Rose's Cantina

That's me, front, second from the left. When I was in high school, I was a size 12, which today would be a size 8. I was proud of my tiny waist, it was a 23 as I recall, but my big hips bothered me. I wasn't delusional; I knew there was nothing I could do about them. There was no fat on them, just the hip bone. But I was aware of them. For years, I was jealous of girls I'd consider scrawny today. They got to wear see through jumpsuits made of bubble wrap, and maxi coats that hugged their lithe bodies. Me, I settled for clothes that were tailored, like the outfit in this photo, shirts that didn't cling, skirts that weren't too snug. I would have been the perfect private school girl. I realize now that my body shame started back in high school. It was hard to accept that I didn't have a perfect body, the kind the boys all drooled over. I was just an anonymous kid, the egghead, who hung out with the freaks and geeks in the audio-visual room. ...

#143175379 / gettyimages.com   I'm troubled by a recent media circus over remarks made by the director of a local food bank. Karen Secord, the coordinator of the Parkdale Food Centre, says she has been turning back food she doesn't believe is good for her clients, things like Kraft Dinner and canned soup. The interview set off a media feeding frenzy and ruffled a lot of feathers among people who donate to the Ottawa Food Bank, which does not share Ms. Secord's policy. Media trainers must be lining up right now to give Ms. Secord some advice about how to do media interviews. Meanwhile she's been threatened and called names by people, and by the looks of the follow-up story she has no idea why. I don't think anyone disagrees with Ms. Secord that disadvantaged people need, and deserve, nutritious food. From what I've seen looking at the bin at my local Loblaws, most people are making good choices concerning what they put in their food bank do...

Dear Gallbladder: I've been thinking a lot about you over the last week whilst you were relentlessly stabbing me in the back. I'm disappointed in you. We've been through so much together; now is not the time to break up. Of course, we might not have any choice. The doctor may issue a restraining order meaning that you and I will inevitably part ways. I will be alone and you will be in a glass jar someplace mothering all those baby crystals for time in memorial. If this is the case, and we will know soon, I will accept my part in all of this. The drinking, the 2 a.m. smoked meat at Nate's, the T-bones on the barbecue. We've had some good times, haven't we? I was the life of the party and you, well, you were the organ beneath my ribs. I see now how selfish I've been. Putting my face in that pile of ribs was awesome, but I understand now what a sacrifice you made. Mixing up bile, spewing out stones, and I never even knew. You suffered in silenc...

Tired of hearing about my exercise and diet regime yet? Well, go find something else to read. What do you expect from an obsessive-compulsive ADD girl anyway? It's hard for people like me to commit, but when we do, we go all in. Today, I started the day with a mushroom egg omelette and a trip to the gymnasty. Right now, I'm drinking a 90 calorie vanilla almond latte which tastes EXACTLY like a Tim Horton's double double. I shit you not. Then I'll do housework after which Scott will return home to barbecue some lovely beef tournedos I picked up at Farm Boy today. We'll have that with a tomato salad littered with bocconcini pearls and red onions and maybe we'll have a nice slaw. That's right baby, I'm turning into Martha Fucking Stewart. Deal! Oops, I forgot about lunch. Can't forget about lunch! I'm trying to decide between a sweet potato and chicken stew or a bowl of chili. Maybe a stir fry? Why the choice? I've been cooking all ...

I couldn't have picked a better week to do a juice cleanse. It's hot as a whore out there, so who wants to turn on the stove? In fact, I'm using my stove as my juicing station now. It's also nice not to have to think about what's for dinner. You know what's for dinner, lunch and breakfast. I bought this Breville Juicer about three years ago and I used it, like, twice. Now I'm cranking out my entire week's worth of eats in it. I can make an entire day's worth of juice in about half an hour. I thought juicing was going to be expensive, but it turns out that I can do it for less than ten bucks a day if I go Farm Boy and buy my apples, oranges and peppers in the discount bin. What does it matter if the skin is a little bruised? It's going to be pulverized anyway. The worst thing about a juice fast is what comes out the other end, especially after a beet juice session. Not for the faint of heart. But energy. I feel like Bradley Cooper in ...

Perhaps against my better judgement, on Monday, I will forging ahead on yet another diet regime. I'm not a good dieter; I have trouble staying with most diets because they make me feel sick. But I'm hanging my hopes on Harley Pasternak, trainer to the stars, who claims he can get a person like me swimsuit ready in 20 days. I haven't been swimsuit ready in decades. If you don't know him, Harley is a Canadian with a masters in nutrition and kinesiology. He started his professional career as a trainer for the Canadian military and segued into the movie business training the likes of J Lo and Halle Berry. Actually, a better question than who "has" Harley trained is who "hasn't" he trained. Okay, so I'm not stupid. The odds of me having a bod like Jennifer Lopez is a big friggin' zero. My hope is that I merely can start looking good for Rose . I'm not looking to be a size four. A size four would make me look like a cancer patient...

In a tale reminiscent of the McDonald’s hot coffee lawsuit, moms in the U.S. brought a class-action case against Nutella maker Ferrero, claiming it misled them by portraying the chocolate spread as “an example of a tasty yet balanced breakfast.” Seriously, moms? You thought that crap was good for you? You're probably the kind of mom who buys food for your kids that says made with "real fruit juice" or "real cheese". Read your labels, people! Here are the ingredients in Nutella, according to Wikipedia: According to the product label, the main ingredients of Nutella are sugar and vegetable oils (mostly palm oil [ 5 ] ), followed by hazelnut , cocoa solids , and skimmed milk . In the United States, Nutella contains soy products. [ 6 ] Nutella is marketed as "hazelnut cream" in many countries. Under Italian law, it cannot be labeled as a chocolate cream, as it does not meet minimum cocoa solids concentration criteria. About half of the...

I spent last night laying on a gurney in the hospital waiting for an evaluation. Nobody came to see me. Eventually, some people came by with buckets of KFC and the whole ward turned into a party. Never did see a nurse. Or a doctor. Just a whole lot of people like me laying on gurneys with sheets over them. With chicken juice dripping down their legs. Some health care dreams are better than others.