Rose's Cantina

Memorandum     To: Fearless Leader From: Rona Ambrose, Health Minister Re: Obesity strategy   Dear Leader:   Thank you for providing me with this opportunity to give some input into your wonderful, nation-building agenda. I know, I haven't been much help in the past, but I'm trying, I'm really, really trying. Bruce and I were in bed the other night and he noticed that I was getting a little round in the tummy, not a good look for me, I know. "Why don't you get a bit of exercise?" he said. "You're not getting any younger, or thinner. Still, your hair looks great." At first I was a bit mad, but then I thought: why not turn a negative into a positive? As I was brushing my hair in the morning, the light bulb just went off. Bam. Nearly knocked me out of my Uggs. I'm not getting any younger or thinner, just like the rest of Canadians. I remember something Dr. Oz had said to me. You remember, we retained him to help u...

If you're looking for a good deal on a car, don't call my husband. He's finally given up on being that super-successful car guy, the one who brings in $70,000 a year by ripping off consumers. I've never met a car saleman who makes $70k -- most of the really, really successful guys make $40k tops. I've also never met a consumer who knew that. Most people think that car salesmen are lining their pockets with gold, hence they try to get brand new cars for $10,000 taxes in. It's a ridiculous business, a pyramid scheme where the dealers and managers cut the commission down to the bare bones just so they can meet their quota and keep their dealership licence. These same owners and managers make tonnes of money because they take a cut from all the sales guys who sometimes make barely enough money to cover their gas and a Tim Horton's coffee. Like my husband. We had one month recently in which Scott brought home $1,200 for working long days and weekends. ...