Weidorje – "Weidorje" (Cobra – COB 37014)1978

The envious ears of a bunch of over-paid Parisian session men vibrated to the sound of Magma and they thought that they could do the same...but,as musicians are prone to think, they were better at it and could do better.

They managed to release just three tracks in their lifetime,which made up their sole album,here beefed up with a couple of live outings
They were of course very Magma styled,even nicking their Kobaian name from a Magma track,blending in elements of systemic music, and some saxophone.An element long ago dropped in early Magma giving it a distinctive sound of its own(it says here!).Yep....more Zeuhl-lite for potential chart action.The ill-advised use of Brass steers proceedings firmly towards the Fusion-end of Zeuhl,but at least those Wagnerian Brunhilde vocalists don't make an appearance.

The session men involved soon realised that there was no money in having their own Zeuhl band,and soon melted away back into playing guitar solo's for Johnny Hallyday or arranging romantic string sections for Sacha Distel.

They did however leave us one of the most listenable French Prog records,that may even attract people into the room rather than drive them away from it....dunno if that's a good thing, but sometimes its useful.Even if it's just to avoid the noise of the unenlightened majority demanding that this racket be turned off.

Tracklisting:

1.Elohims Voyage 16:33
2.Vilna 12:20
3.Booldemug 7:10

Bonus Tracks:
4.Rondeau 8:49
5.Kolinda 12:28

DOWNLOAD this wee orgy or for the benfit of Donald Trump that's kobaian for pee pee party HERE!

Besombes - Rizet – "Pôle" (Pôle Records – PÔLE 0006/0007)1975

Another French electronic duo,but this time without disguises,and looking at them maybe they should have? Dunno which is which, but one of them, be it Bescombes or Rizet smokes a pipe.Not enough pipe smokers in progressive rock for my money.

They also had a remortgaged house worth of keyboards: VCS 3 AKS, ARP 2600, Electrocomp 101 and 500, Farfisa Synthorchestra , YamahaF Y 1, Oberheim Expander , Solina Stringensemble , Crumor electric piano, Fender Rhodes electric piano, Hammond Organ and,last but not least,a Mellotron 400.

All that and a pipe too!On paper this sounds perfect.

They didn't waste time on creating a trademark sound.There's nothing here that, if you didn't know better,you could sit back and say, "Ahhh, that's Bescombes and Rizat that is".Bouncing between Cluster duetting with Rick Wakeman after his fingers were amputated, to Robert Rental before he was Robert Rental,but spacey enough to be Robert Rental after his death. It's as if they,shockingly, had never heard of Mozart,which was an obligatory influence for all progressive rockers in 1975,alongside numerous versions of 'Lick My Love Pump'by many a proto-nwobhm band in Birmingham or Essex; Not for Bescombes and Rizet was the electrification of the usual suspect suspects from the sleep inducing classical era; they wanted to experiment!?

There's also not many albums that are named after their record label either......how cool is that? As Captain Oates said on the now speedily melting Ross Ice Shelf, "I'm going outside, i may be some time".....when in fact he was checking out this immortal French Prog double album on the hotter part of the Pôle,to be thawed out approximately fifty years later at the most southerly record fayre held in the spritual wreckage of Shackleton's Discovery. Now everyone wants a piece of this Discovery,so here's your chance to step outside and stay there for the duration of the four splendid sides of this electronic prog miesterwerk.

Just a small francophobic  aspersion to come, as i've been quite nice to them recently. If Scott's crew had been French, they would have pushed Captain Oates out of the tent to certain death to save themselves rather than rely on his noble deed of self-sacrifice.

Bescombes and Rizet got to the Pôle lomg before Amundsen,and they didn't even have to leave the warmth of the studio....all likely paid for by the French Government's vast Art Grant's department;to the astonishment of the UK Tax Payer,and beyond.Bloody Socialists!

Tracklist:

A1 Haute Pression 10:56
A2 Evelyse 7:17
B Armature Double 18:00
C1 Lundi Matin 5:41
C2 Montélimar 7:37
C3 Rock À Montauban 3:30
D Synthi Soit-Il 21:42

DOWNLOAD the first men to reach the Pôle HERE!

Philippe Grancher – "3000 Miles Away" (Pôle Records – PÔLE 0014) 1975

About the same time Throbbing Gristle were glamorizing serial killers and feeling too clever by 'arf, a forward looking French guitarist was predicting future serial killing by assuming the form of Cromwell Street child killer Rose West 20 years before she got her dog collar felt by PC Plod. 

Never ones to put style ahead of tucking a sweater into some high waisted slacks, the French guitarist doesn't understand why image should come before musical proficiency;and Philippe certainly seems to have image pretty low on his list of priorities......and why not?

Rose

 

Philippe

Although Philippe's career path was registered as "Guitarist" (they do this kind of thing in France,even i'm registered there as an 'Artist' ffs!),he seems to have forgone the requirement to flesh that out by actually playing one.He instead has opted for the banks of keyboards and synthesiser option that was so fashionable in 1975.The few guitary parts were actually played by someone else........Noooooo....not Fred West...someone called Arnaud Chevalier. The lead instrument seems to be a Piano,with  bits of Mellotron,and lots of effects.

Despite looking like a serial killer from 20 years into the future,our Phil doesn't let that hinder his creativity,and keeps his pullover firmly tucked into his waistband to make one of thee better French prog Space rock albums of all time. Another Pole Records classic,but I doubt if Phil was kept on as a model for the Porn Mag that the company became after 1977,even though the pervy glasses are a good look for rude magazines in the seventies.If worn by the unfortunate young lady involved,glasses can be a convenient place to deposit the money-shot.

He can still be seen ,however, playing the blues (zer bloose) in French bars for a living....and he still looks like Rose West......poor sod!

So if you can stand sitting in a café full of swarthy Frenchmen with B.O. wildly applauding that Muddy Waters cover at one of his engagements ,shout out for "3000 Miles" as an encore,and see the room empty as they wheel the piano out.

Tracklist:

A1 3000 Miles Away 10:00
A2 Naïvetés 2:50
A3 Réflexions À Propos D'un Miroir 3:00
B1 Flip-Flop 10:00
B2 Birds, Birds 6:10

DOWNLOAD philippes f-lop HERE!

Herman's Rocket – "Space Woman" (Disques Ibach – 60520) 1977

What did crazed French Progressive Space rocker Jean-Pierre Massiera do as soon as Punk Rock infiltrated the pop culture of every medium sized town in every medium sized country and medium sized brain in the western world around 1977? Why he immediately dumped his Space Rock past did the proper Punk thang to do and went Disco....but, this is NOT the Disco that we came to know and despise .Oh No!This was the Disco soundtrack to One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest starring a lobotomised John Travolta wiggling his hips to a crowd of medicated victims of electric shock therapy,shuffling around the secure unit dancefloor.The BeeGee's have painted themselves Green,renamed themselves the BeeGreens and wore blonde afro wigs after being treated with experimental drugs gone very wrong.

Nowhere was Disco music made so as incredibly daft and weird as it was in La France,except maybe in the former Soviet Union?

Herman's Rocket......what a band name.....is the nuts.Come on kids,let's dance and get high on some liberal use of Electro Convulsive Therapy....with a Disco Beat..er...in Space!

Tracklist:

1 Space Woman 5:11
2 Golden Crystallen 2:48
3 Transport Mission Security 3:33
4 Spirit In The Wind 4:20
5 The Last Tournament 3:51
6 Space Rebel 3:16
7 Jupiter Flight N°9 4:08
8 Indian Planet 2:37
9 Hanged In Univers 3:22
10 Green Creature 4:10

DOWNLOAD like punk had never happened HERE!

Heldon – "Third : It's Always Rock'n'Roll" (Disjuncta – 000006/7) 1975

Did they mean to say 'It's Only Rock'n'Roll' but it got lost in translation,or is this the correct title?

It is however,Heldon's final appearance on Pinhas's own label, Disjuncta,and its a goody....it's always Rock'n'Roll and I like it,like it,yes I doooo!

But this is,thankfully as far away from the Rolling Stones as you can get and still call it Rock'n'Roll. Rather too many Drug references going on for my liking,but at least there ain't no lyrics to further compound my disapproval. Nice hair,effing gr8 guitar virtuosity ,and effect laden,electronic ear abuse from some Frenchmen who dig Fripp and Eno....don't get to say that very often. They ALL (the Frogs) like Zer Rollin stonsss without exception,but they so make good unadventurous food,so we'll forgive them that faux pas.Stone the bleedin'crows guv'nr, even i like that Emotional Rescue album.....weird shit going on there.There isn't a French person who doesn't worship Zer Doorsss either,and more bizarrely Superrrtromp. Ask a Frenchman what they think of Heldon,and they wouldn't be able to place the name,incredulously wondering why an Anglo-Saxon would want to listen to a French group rather than Led Zeppelin(they can pronounce that one) or Leonard Sky-nard!? Its like that moment when Bowie was on German TV,and the interviewer asked the David what German music he liked as he had heard that he was heavily influenced by new German music.His Bowieness asked the audience if they had heard of Neu and one voice shouted "Ja!".(its on YouTube somewhere)

There are indeed other French groups that are worth listening to,and we shall discover them over the coming weeks, said Humpty;or if you're american...so said The Cookie Monster.

Tracklist:

A1 Ics Machinique
A2 Cotes De Cachalot À La Psylocybine
A3 Mechamment Rock
A4 Cocaine Blues
B Aurore
C1 Virgin Swedish Blues
C2 Ocean Boogi
C3 Zind Destruction (Bouillie Blues)
D Doctor Bloodmoney

DOWNLOAD as you're always downloading HERE!

Heldon – "Heldon II : Allez-Téia " (Disjuncta – 000002) 1975

Never before has one witnessed such on record arse-licking than one has witnessed on Richard Pinhas' albums. He likes Robert Fripp apparently?

Eno never gets a mention one notices, which after inventing Frippertronics for Robert to play his sustaining pick-ups through,is a bit rich.

So, yes, you get plenty of short Fripp and Eno facsimiles,but even better lots,and lots, of Mellotron.

All this from a slimmed down version of Heldon, now briefly,a duo for Heldon 2, a mellow, melodic,mellotronic and very drumless experience to burn a scented candle to in your virtual flotation tank.There's even an acoustic guitar track to remind oneself of the riverbank on a sunny day to further relax the reluctant Space Rocker yearning for a Dave Gilmour solo.

I think Fripp should dedicate an album to Ricky Pinhas on the evidence of this. From Bobby to Ricky with love.XX

Tracklist:

1 In The Wake Of King Fripp 6:36
2 Aphanisis 2:20
3 Omar Diop Blondin 7:20
4 Moebius 1:49
5 Fluence (Continuum Mobile) 1:56
6 Fluence (Disjonction Inclusive) 10:17
7 St-Mikael Samstag Am Abends 6:18
8 Michel Ettori 4:17

DOWNLOAD this capsized tribute to bobby fripp HERE!

Hydravion – "Hydravion" (Cobra – COB 37012) 1977

 

Let's start off with a review i saw of this on Discogs:

"Terrible dull, empty and meaningless album. No real melody, there's not a single musical moment. All is more like rudimentary experimentation in "progressive" style. No instrumental, nor "song" writing abilities are shown despite of being progressive music. Compared to any other similar spacey contemporaries (as to a similar empty Heldon) it's absolutely a wasting of time. Go and find houndreds better in the genre."

After reading that, you just know that this album has to be brilliant?

I like my music empty and meaningless, so what? After all doesn't that describe existence itself? There's a meaning to the meaninglessness....ness. More than there is to existence at least.

There's something of the 'La Dusseldorf' about this French Krautband. I thought La Dusseldorf were joking when I first heard them, and Hydravion most certainly are NOT joking.It also reminds one of those Soviet Union official disco bands that cropped up on state label Melodija from time to time....and I certainly know they weren't joking either.Joking could get you into serious trouble in the Communist Bloc.

Of course the French notoriously cannot laugh at themselves,they can laugh at disableds or Belgians,but NEVER, at themselves; so it figures that this electro-prog trio mean every dull swirling note and therefore is,predictably french,and more than a noggin pretentiously, 'ART'.

Yes, it's empty,there's no melody, no songs, but it's space rock made for surfing the event horizon of the super massive black hole in the centre of the music industry.

Wanna piss of that aging Punk with the Joy Division T-Shirt next door?....then play this at toe curling volume,followed by La Dusseldorf and then Argo's "Discophonia". Guaranteed to push the aging Punk neighbour over the edge, and totally fuck off the poor chap who wrote that dreadfully conservative review above.

I guess Hydravion is French for a Flying Boat,which,if there was to be another great flood sent down by our loving creator,then a flying Ark would be a great way to get around and rescue all the species left on the planet while we waited for the water to drain away.Luckily no need to save two of every fish,and controversially, no gays allowed! Even no Gay Chimps allowed,unless a third chimp is recruited as a surrogate chimp for future births to repopulate the devastated planet.I suppose the sea level would have to exceed the top of Mount Everest,so that would make the oceans at lease 29000 feet deeper than it was before we were all taught a lesson.I assume we would all starve to death after the water levels somehow drained away,so what was the point in creating us anyway....more meaningless...ness? No-one will be volunteering to be the new Noah either in the "Me Too" era, as he's usually biblically required to have sex with his daughters.....unless God hasn't kept up with the times....Again!?

That, essentially is what this album almost certainly Isn't about;but, as it's meaningless one can always insert any meaning you can feel comfortable with,and that takes imagination.A quality few human beings possess in these daft ol' days innit?

Tracklist

A1 Metropolitain 3:36
A2 Triste Fin 10:24
B1 L'Hydravion D'Argent 6:36
B2 Etude En Do 4:45
B3 J'ai Pas Le Temps 7:05

DOWNLOAD the flying boat of doom HERE!

Heldon – "Electronique Guerilla" (Disjuncta – 12/13) 1974

I'm very proud to announce that I have not been awarded a Damehood in the corrupt yet meaningless ongoing joke that is the Queen's New Years honours list, neither for sevices to stealing intellectual property,or spreading corrosive cynicism and being a moaning ol' bastard. Joining the likes of ....is this a joke?....Mel B!!!?  late of the spice girls, Joanna Lumley who was in the New Avengers and something else on TV?Then there's Ashley Banjo for services to bloody awful street dancing,and for being the nearest thing they could find to a Black person,apart from Mel B of course.

The French,of course, don't go in for this kind of stuff.....er...wait a minute they do don't they.That beyond daft Legion d'Honneur silliness. Didn't Patti Smith get something like that for being a self-confessed poet? Celine Dion for singing in French....y'know, stuff like that.

No French Prog innovators are on either the British list or the French list,to my limited knowledge.

So Richard Pinhas, guitar wielding French Progger has none of these dubious Honors.

However he did make some rather interesting self-released LP's under the guise of Heldon, that combined Fripp and Eno with Berlin school style electronics,such as this.Casting himself as some kind of electronic freedom fighter.

There were,and are, of course, many Electronic Terrorists committing crimes against music everywhere on the planet. Jean Michel Jarre and Howard Jones being but two incredibly guilty culprits.But Richard doesn't seem to be one of them.At least not on the evidence of this fine record. 

Tracklist:

1 Zind
2 Back To Heldon
3 Northernland Lady
4 Ouais, Marchais, Mieux Qu'en 68 (Ex : Le Voyageur)
5 Circulus Vitiosus
6 Ballade Pour Puig Antich, Révolutionnaire Assassiné En Espagne

DOWNLOAD a guerilla into the room HERE!

Mess - "Sven Grünberg’s Proge Rock Group Mess(1975-76)" (Bella Musica ‎– BM-CD 31.4199) 1995

Sven Grünberg was in a Estonian progressive rock band called, ironically, Mess;which I hope was a piss-take of 'Yes'? This mess was founded by Sven and the splendidly named Härmo Härm in 1974.However, Despite the many years of the band's existence and many live performances, Mess didn't release a single studio album because of the contradictions of their musical style with Soviet ideology; only in 1995 did Grünberg manage to release a compilation from several surviving Mess recordings,of which makes up this CD,recorded from 1975-76.

I've always had a soft spot for bands that exist for decades yet never release any product, like Keiji Haino's the beyond excellent 'Fushitsusha',and the also excellent 'Mess'.

Mess's sound is a spaced-out experimental type of prog,thats a cross-hybrid between the more cosmic end of Krautrock and the darker,spacier, side of British progressive Rock.Further strengthening the Baltic states claim to be the home of Soviet music,where all the most interesting commie prog,or 'proge'(i'm sure that's a typo,but a good genre name nonetheless) bands came from.

Sven eventually got his 'professional' status which enabled him to get a record released on Melodiya under his own name,the soviet-kosmiche electronic classic, "Hingus".

Tracklist:
1 Overture/Avamäng 1:48
2 Green Hearths/Rohelised Leed 7:16
3 Bright Mornings/Valged Hommikud 6:31
4 To The Clouds/Pilvini 4:19
5 Pond/Tiik 9:43
6 Story/Lugu 6:09
7 Alone/Üksi 4:39
8 Ask Yourself/Küsi Eneselt 10:39
9 Sky/Taevas (Coda) 2:40

DOWNLOAD this mess HERE!

Zodiac ‎– "Disco Alliance" (Мелодия ‎– C60-13771-2) 1980

It's 1980,the year of the Olympics, the one when nobody went because of the Soviet Invasion of Afghanistan, and Disco was hitting big in the Baltic states.
Meanwhile ,in the students' club of the Latvian State Conservatoire of music, Janis Lusens (a Bloke by the way!) organized a rock-group, named "Zodiac". Their first album, "Disco Alliance",turned out to be the Soviet "Dark Side Of The Moon" if not for its spacey themes,then for its persistence in the Soviet charts. LP's, issued in large quantities, sold out immediately in every corner of that huge drab empire.The Melodija pressing plants were straining to keep up with demand, even with their low grade pressing standards, and cheapo sleeve printing.

Zodiac's mid tempo instrumental electronic rock had everyone dancing like the zombies in the 'Night Of The Living dead',from deepest Siberia to the Kremilin ballroom.Even leonid Brezhnev was seen tapping his foot to this classic Latvian cheese, momentarily before he had to stand and endure the mayday parade of nuclear missles.Ironically the very things that destroyed the USSR.Their incentiveless economy was drained dry by spending all their roubles on those rediculous ICBM's.

The only joy the proletariat had were the unannouced record releases that state label Melodija turned out.Your average Comrade only had to look at the front cover and read such forbidden pleasures as 'Instrumental Rock Group' that adorned the terrible cover of Zodiac's magnum opus, and you were away. The word spread quickly that there was a new Rock group from the glorious republic of Latvia, and everyone wanted one. Not easy to supply millions of albums when your industry runs on sludge. No-one knows how many copies they sold ,but it must have been over a few million.

It's a sort of cross between 'Dark Side of the Moon',BBC Testcard music,Georgio Moroder and 'Stars on 45',all the way from the Dark side of the Earth.

Tracklist:

A1 Zodiac 5:12
A2 Pacific 3:52
A3 Provincial Disco 4:18
B1 Polo 3:17
B2 Mirage 4:02
B3 Rock On The Ice 2:42
B4 Alliance 3:41

DOWNLOAD from the dark side of the earth HERE!

Guru Guru ‎– "UFO" (Ohr ‎– OMM 56 005) 1970

Probably my favourite Kraut Freak-out album from Rocks golden era is "UFO",This is how to abuse an electric guitar,whilst walking a delicate line between control and chaos,with a loose but tight rhythm unit rumbling along behind the electric storm clouds of Ax Genrich.
The sister of a now deceased German friend of mine, Uli, who looked not unlike a member Guru Guru; told me at his funeral, that Mani Neumeier  (the drummer of Guru Guru)once suggested that she have sex with him.A request to which, she understandably refused vigorously.Looking at the band pictures its a wonder any of these Free Rock legends got laid at all.
From this peak,they slowly decended that well trodden down escalator to Jazz Rock Hell.

Tracklist:

A1 Stone In 5:42
A2 Girl Call 6:15
A3 Next Time See You At The Dalai Lhama 6:10
B1 Ufo 10:15
B2 Der LSD-Marsch 8:25

DOWNLOAD then U F Off HERE!

Ash Ra Tempel - "The Private Tapes Vol. 1" (Manikin Records ‎– MRCD 7011) 1996

So, we've established that 'Krautrock' was a rougher form of prog rock by German groups who wanted to be Pink Floyd,with splashes of Zappa,Soft Machine, and The Velvet Underground.They weren't gonna be doing world tours or hiring jumbo jets or anything like ELP or Led Zeppelin anytime soon, so they could get a bit more unpalatable for the stinking masses than any Anglo-American group were allowed to.

Firmly in the Pink Floyd-a-like camp are the various incarnations of Ash Ra Tempel supremo, Manuel Gottsching.

This is the first volume in a series of six CDs of unreleased historic recordings from the seventies by Manuel and his groups Ash Ra Tempel & Ashra.

The first track from 1979 is an insipid new age foray into the unforgiving world of bland medatative neck pick-up guitar noodling.

Next up we get a Berlin School influenced proto ambient trance seqencer piece,think Tangerine Dream but crapper.
The catchily titled,"Begleitmusik Zu Einem Hörspiel"is classic, get yer echo boxes out Pink Floyd mimickry, then back to new age beige for "Bois De La Lune"

Track 5 is a truly terrible sixties German high school blues band atrocity.....it can only get better...and it does.... on volume 2.

Tracklist:

1 –Manuel Göttsching -  Bois De Soleil (1979) 3:14
2 –Manuel Göttsching - Eloquentes Wiesel (1979) 28:47
3 –Manuel Göttsching - Begleitmusik Zu Einem Hörspiel (1974) 24:41
4 –Manuel Göttsching - Bois De La Lune (1979) 7:26
5 –Steeple Chase Bluesband -Chicken Maladie (1970) 9:52

DOWNLOAD to your private hard-drive HERE!