Jilted John – "True Love Stories... Plus" (Castle Music – ESM CD 771) 1978

I remember sending me mum downtown to the record shop to get "Jilted John" by Jilted John on Rabid back in '78......but,it had SOLD OUT?!

This tchoon's time in the limelight coincided with the only visit logged to date of my Australian relatives from the suburbs of Sydney.......I'm now thinking of that fine song by The Fall, "Australians in Europe.....Peel Session version", that reignited my enthusiasm for MES and said group. These were absolutely NOT fans of The Saints,or any of those fine Oz Punk groups.Cousin Carl still wore the most horrible flared jeans,and liked stuff such as Fleetwood Mac and The Beatles(!?)So he was rather shocked at what was happening in the the whole of the UK, music wise. He accompanied me to the Record Shop where i bought that Raw Records Compilation "(Oh No)...it's More From Raw", which included such classic Punk Rock tchoons, as The beyond great Users' "Sick Of You", faux cockney's The killjoys, Some Chickens' manson inspired "Blood On The Wall",Hammersmith Gorillas etc.....not a bad track as far as i was concerned,but Carl was Horrified;later confiding in my mother that he felt Old and past it....he was 17.This of course only encouraged me to play it constantly,and at some stage i slipped Jilted John,on EMI, onto my turntable.This got an enthusiastic response from the female end of our antipodean relations.Cousin Clare was my age and secured herself a copy to take back to Wolongong to show off her new Punk single to her mates.

Describing this novelty single as "Punk" was pushing it a bit,but it had the sneery vocals,one chord guitar work,the group,....or the Rabid Records staff... looked a bit scruffy, but it did have its DIY roots,so i couldn't discourage the idea.This could have been by Johnny Rotten if he had a more privileged upbringing lived in Manchester and was nice.

I never bought, or even know of a Jilted John album until it got re-released in 1999.It's largely awful,and provided further evidence that this Graham Fellows project should have lasted for one single only;but, it does sound like a potential Lost-Teenage dream nostalgia musical that never was.....so maybe in the future?

Tracklist:

1 Jilted John– Going Steady 3:52
2 Jilted John– Baz's Party 4:30
3 Jilted John– I Know I'll Never 1:32
4 Jilted John– I Was A Pre-Pubescent 2:57
5 Jilted John– Fancy Mice 5:10
6 Jilted John– Jilted John (LP Version) 3:02
7 Jilted John– The Birthday Kiss 3:53
8 Jilted John– The Paperboy Song 4:17
9 Jilted John– True Love 3:16
10 Jilted John– In The Bus Shelter 1:36
11 Jilted John– Karen's Letter 1:49
12 Jilted John– Shirley 4:17
13 Jilted John– Goodbye, Karen 2:37
14 Jilted John– Jilted John (Single Version) 2:58
15 Gordon The Moron– Fit For Nothing 3:08
16 Gordon The Moron– Sold On You 4:00

DOWNLOAD HERE! you sad excuse for a post-pubescent you!

Jilted John – "Jilted Jam Demos Rehearsals & Gigs 1977 - 2008" (Boss Tuneage – BTRCRS090) 2016

Another from the same northern monkey school of straddling that grey area between acting, comedy and music, would have to be,one Graham Fellows aka, Jilted John and John Shuttleworth. As was so kindly mentioned by someone in the comments section,he appeared on manchesters' Rabid records, along with stablemates Slaughter and the Dogs, John Cooper Clark, Chris Seivey (Frank Sidebottom),Ed Banger and the Nosebleeds;featuring none other than Vinni Riley of Durutti Column fame,and briefly Jilted John....before EMI snaffled him up.

Yes, "Jilted John" by Jilted John, was a top ten smash in summer 1978.Back in the days when You could say things like Slag,Bitch and Puff on television and not face being cancelled. As this clip of John's third appearance on Top Of The Pops demonstrates, beginning with Jimmy Saville cavorting alongside three possible victims while introducing John on live vocals.Sadly it was destined to become yet another novelty one hit wonder......but there was more....an album and a slew of flop singles.Not to mention demo's and even a couple of gigs!?

Essentially, Graham was more on the Actor who does music rather than the musician who does acting,which never works out great, does it David Bowie ? Actors who do music did have rather more sucess than the aforementioned disasters...namely Punishment Of Luxury, Shoes For Industry,  Albertos y los trios Paranoias and...erm....Jilted John.

I rather think the Jilted John Project would have been better left as just a novelty hit, but of course, when a major label is involved, they squeeze the juice out of anything they get their stupid hands on.Which reminds me of the time when the top EMI record executive met new signings Pink Floyd, and asked which one was 'pink'.

Jilted John would have been a musical in the west end if it was made now....it still could I guess,it's all there,the story sung in half-rhyme,the nostalgic characters,the teenage  memories,the hit, all that's needed is some naff choreography by Wayne Sleep and a few million quid from Andrew Lloyd-Webber's bulging coffers, and an unsanctioned Oligarch.The Public would love it.

John/Graham had another brush with minor fame,this time as an actor,playing Gail Tilsley's inappropriate young lover in Coronation Street.....before reinventing himself as retired Steelworker John Shuttleworth,who spent his redundancy on a secondhand Yamaha keyboard in a quest for fame as a singer songwriter. His greatest hit I would suggest, has to be "Pigeons In Flight" (more on the way....recorded in Dolby.

Tracklist:

1 Jilted John (Live At Erics, Liverpool, May 12th 1978) 3:28
2 Unknown Interview Clip 1 0:50
3 Jilted John (Original Demo, December 1977) 3:20
4 Going Steady (Live At Erics, Liverpool, May 12th 1978) 3:36
5 Unknown Interview Clip 2 1:00
6 Jilted John (What's On, Granada TV, April 1978) 2:43
7 Going Steady (Live At Big Chill, August 2008) 4:39
8 Baz's Party (Band Rehearsal, September 1978) 5:03
9 Radio Clip 1 (BBC Radio 1, November 1978) 1:17
10 Birthday Kiss (Live At Erics, Liverpool, May 12th 1978) 4:26
11 Shirley (Band Rehearsal, September 1978) 3:53
12 Unknown Interview Clip 3 0:33
13 My Love's Just Begun (Unreleased Recording, 1979) 3:24
14 Baz's Party (Original Demo, 6th August 1978) 6:17
15 Radio Clip 2 (BBC Radio Manchester, November 1978) 1:39
16 Birthday Kiss (Live At Big Chill, August 2008) 4:50
17 Paperboy Song (Original Demo, July 1978) 4:09
18 Radio Clip 3 (BBC Radio Manchester, November 1978) 0:55
19 Keira Knightly (Live At Big Chill, August 2008) 2:39
20 Stoodup Stephen (Original Demo, January 1978) 6:08
21 Debbie, Debbie (Live At Erics, Liverpool, May 12th 1978) 2:42
22 Trendy Wendy (Original Demo, April 1978) 4:15
23 Jilted John (Live At Big Chill, August 2008) 5:10
24 Sharon's Song (Original Demo, Incomplete, Early 1978) 1:14

DOWNLOAD HERE! you Slaaaaaags!

John Cooper Clarke ‎– "Où Est La Maison De Fromage?" (Rabid Records ‎– NOZE 1) 1978

Staying on the theme of Manchester word-smiths,one must dedicate at least one post to the original ranting poet Johnny Clarke. Yes, he who saw how Bob Dylan dressed in 1966,and it stuck. Rarely seen without shades,he claims that he's photophobic,hence an excuse as to why he wears sunglasses in a nightclub. Having seen a sneaky photo of John sans lunettes du soleil,one can see why he's manufactured this story. Afterall, thats what he's good at? 
Unlike American stand up poets, the British variety tends to lean more towards comedy as a weapon rather than shock and awe. I think Patti Smith tried a few of her pretentious poems at gigs in the more provincial parts of the UK and had the odd missile thrown penetrating the unenthusiastic reception outside the more arty venues in London. Nearly all these poets were from outside the capital,where there was far more incentive to do something that would help you escape the prison of poverty that places like Bradford and Barnsley had become by the winter of discontent.
"Où Est La Maison De Fromage?",or 'where is the Cheese Shop',was the only Cooper-Clarke album that actually captured him at his best,with his trademark 100 miles an hour word delivery in his unabashed Salford accent......likely indecipherable to most americans,so forget about 'Breaking America',as so many bands of that era seemed to want to do?

The poems themselves bursting with satire,endless humour and boundlessly clever couplets,backed up with John's endlessly witty repartee.

Future albums, with Martin 'I over produce' Hannett,and the Invisible Girls,Clarke had to slow down his delivery by at least 75%,so he became a different act on record than he was live.Although he did do a tour with The Invisible Girls,but this was something different and far less effective than his one man shows.As heard on the Peel Session included here.

Hopefully,before he dies, he will be given the opportunity to turn down the role of 'Poet Laureate'.


Tracklist:
1 The Serial (Part 1)
2 Letter To Fiesta
3 Film Extra's Extra
4 Majorca
5 Action Man
6 Kung Fu International
7 Sperm Test
8 Missing Persons
9 Split Beans
10 Dumb Row Laughs
11 Bunch Of Twigs
12 Trains
13 The Cycle Accident
14 Gimmix
15 Readers Wives
16 Ten Years In An Open Neck Shirt (Part 1)
17 Nothing
18 (I Married A) Monster From Outer Space
19 Ten Years In An Open Neck Shirt (Part 2)
20 Daily Express (You Never See A Nipple In The)
21 Ten Years In An Open Neck Shirt (Part 3)
22 Salome Malone
23 Psycle Sluts (Part 1)
24 Bronze Adonis
25 (I Married A) Monster From Outer Space (John Peel Session)
26 Readers Wives (John Peel Session)
27 Health Fanatic (John Peel Session)
28 Split Beans (John Peel Session)
29 Suspended Sentence
30 Innocents
31 Psycle Sluts (Parts 1 & 2)
32 Daily Express (You Never See A Nipple In The) (Live)
33 (I Married A) Monster From Outer Space (Live)

DOWNLOAD from your favourite cheese vendor HERE!

Slaughter and the Dogs - "Live Slaughter/ Rabid Dogs" (live bootleg 1977)

My favourite 'Punk' band was/is the gloriously Stupid Slaughter and the Dogs. These yobs were like the real people I knew, and they wore scarves! Not a jot of Kings Road finery to be seen, and absolutely no pseudo-situationist bollocks to be heard.
This is Slaughter's version of 'Spunk', a fairly awful live performance, but that's its charm.
Punk rock could have gone all the way if all the groups by-passed the record labels and put out bootlegs for the fans, and ignored the charts completely. A missed opportunity.

Tracks:

You're A Bore

Mystery Girls

Johny T

Where Have All The Boot Boys Gone

We Don't Care

Waiting For The Man

Victims Of The Vampire

Boston Babies

I'm Mad

We Don't Care (Reprise)

DOWNLOAD these Rabid Dogs HERE!