WE WON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Again)

So happy to be re-posting what I did four years ago. Not only am I thrilled for four more years of Obama, but all the other victories for women, for the LGBT community, for legalization of weed and other progressive ideals - and for the failure of the hateful racism of the Tea Party, the super PACs, religious fanatics, Ayn Randian politics, rape-obsessed old white men and lying, tax-evading billionaires. This is a wonderful day to be an American. Let's all move FORWARD!

Gore Vidal (1925-2012)

Anonymous has left a new comment

I just love getting reader feedback on my blog posts. I really love when the feedback is for something I posted over a year ago - which tells me that people actually look at older posts! Who knew?

We'll, today I got an interesting little message from somebody named "Anonymous" that I'd like to share with my readers. This comment is in response to a post I made on September 29, 2009 on the controversial topic of celebrity record albums called "When TV Stars Sing".

Here is the lovely message from Anonymous:

"You ruin your blog with hateful comments, but what else is new? Yet another leftie spewing stereotypical rhetoric, ie, all Republicans are nut jobs. The second such comment I've read from you, so I'll just leave your blog.

For the record, I am an independent, so I think you are all "nut jobs" in a moronic civil war. But you have to interject your immaturity into a blog that should be free of politics and religion. Wouldn't it bother you if a cool blog about classic stuff randomly called homosexuals (or blacks) hateful names? Or do you think that's fine, that everybody should be disrespectful?

You partisan political boneheads have ruined civility on this planet. I'll bet you probably think you are a peaceful, good person. But you have the same hate in your heart as terrorists. Aren't you proud?"

Normally when I get messages like this (about one a year), I ignore it. But today, after learning about the death of the legendary goddess Tura Satana - I feel I have to respond somehow. Kinda like the angry drag queens who started the Stonewall Riots on the night Judy Garland died, but with a lot less makeup, feathers and glitter.

Okay, let's dissect Anonymous' claims:

"You ruin your blog with hateful comments, but what else is new? "

Well, there's lots new. New York.  New Kids on the Block. New Zoo Revue. I for one, do not think my blog is "ruined" - it's my damn blog and it's my damn opinions. My so-called hateful comments are in response to other people's bigotry and intolerance. In the case of Buddy Ebsen - he was a not a nice person. His negative campaign against co-star Nancy Kulp has been well documented, and it cost her an election.

"Yet another leftie spewing stereotypical rhetoric, ie, all Republicans are nut jobs."

I don't recall ever saying all Republicans are nutjobs. Not ALL Republicans are nutjobs - but a lot are. So are some Democrats. And liberals. And independents. And people without a sense of humor.

"The second such comment I've read from you, so I'll just leave your blog."

Well, thanks for visiting.

"For the record, I am an independent, so I think you are all "nut jobs" in a moronic civil war."

Glad you cleared that up.

"But you have to interject your immaturity into a blog that should be free of politics and religion. "

Religion & politics are a part of pop culture, always have been, honey. My immaturity is part of my charm. :)

"Wouldn't it bother you if a cool blog about classic stuff randomly called homosexuals (or blacks) hateful names?" 

I'm sure a blog like that exists. It wouldn't bother me because I wouldn't visit it, just like I don't get my news from FOX. The difference here is political affiliation is a conscious CHOICE that someone makes based on their views. Sexual orientation and race are not. Besides "nutjob" isn't hateful - it's fucking funny!

"Or do you think that's fine, that everybody should be disrespectful?"

There is difference between "free speech" and "hate speech". If I said that people should go out and kill Buddy Ebsen's family and deface his grave with feces - that would be disrespectful.

"You partisan political boneheads have ruined civility on this planet."

Civility is still alive. Is calling someone a "bonehead" civil?

"I'll bet you probably think you are a peaceful, good person."

I know I am, bitch.

"But you have the same hate in your heart as terrorists."

Yes, because calling Buddy Ebsen a nutjob is the same as crashing a plane into the Twin Towers.

"Aren't you proud?" 

Oh I'm very proud. Proud that I have 8000 visitors per week who enjoy my blog for what it is - a reflection of the things I like and want to share with like-minded people, not Anonymous visitors who get all bent out of shape because I call Buddy Ebsen a nutjob.

TV GUIDE September 1984

Every September I get a little nostalgic for the old TV GUIDE magazine, you know the one that came in digest size and had good, intelligent articles in the two color sections and exhaustively complete TV listings and crazy black & white display advertising sandwiched in between. Supposedly there is still some sort of weekly entertainment magazine that goes by the name "TV GUIDE", but strangely it is very hard to find in Los Angeles. Go figure. Anyways, in celebration of 25 years since September 1984, I ran this smattering of unusual print ads from my collection last year at this time. And now I run them again. Who better to host an important Special Report about heart disease, cancer and auto accidents than Tony Randall, star of THE ODD COUPLE, THE TONY RANDALL SHOW and LOVE, SIDNEY? Tony sure looks serious in the ad, he must have just lost a round on PASSWORD or some other game show where he was known to be a very competitive player.
Peter Popoff was a popular TV evangelist minister and "faith healer" in the 1980s, until he went bankrupt in 1987 after he was exposed as a fraud. How can that be, when that lady in the ad looks so, um, healed.
The 1st Annual MTV VIDEO MUSIC AWARDS - when the music industry was all about white folks over 40 (and Tina Turner). And nobody wore a disgusting dress made outta meat back then.
"Miss Continental" wasn't even a TV show, but yet they took out this ad - making me wish it was a TV show!!! I wonder if it's still around? I just did a Google search for "Miss Continental" and all that came up were websites for drag competitions. Oh well.
This ad freaks me out - it's like the who's who of conservative America gathered in one place to celebrate liberty??? What the fuck? If you cared about your family, country, financial future and religious liberties you'd have watched this.
A SALUTE TO LIBERACE with David Bowie and Elton John. Nuff said.
Oh no, WELCOME TO THE FAMILY sounds like some sort of cult recruiting program, but it's really about "love, laughter and trust–cementing the bonds between parents and their children." You know, family values. Host Gary Collins has been charged with three counts of "driving under the influence" since 2002. Performer Barbara Mandrell later became an unwelcome stranger in a town where corruption ran deep and tempers burned hot!
Then she co-stared with DUKES OF HAZZARD star Tom Wopat in this TV-movie about the whole sordid experience.

How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying

In honor of the recent screening as a part of LAST REMAINING SEATS, here's a post from November 2008, when I decided I needed to just relax and enjoy a good, simple, mindless old-fashioned musical.

What's more simple and mindless than the film version of the broadway classic, HOW TO SUCCEED IN BUSINESS WITHOUT REALLY TRYING? (1967, directed by David Swift) Well, there's probably dumber and less complex movies out there, but somehow the story of overly ambitious J. Pierpont Finch's meteoric rise from window-washer to chairman of the board was just what I needed!I remember watching this film when it was on TV in the 1970s and loving every minute of it. It's easy to see why - Robert Morse as Finch is a grinning, grimacing, galloping gremlin - like a cartoon character come to life. His body language, his manic energy and innocent, yet seductive charm make him possibly one of the most magnetically watchable cinematic characters ever. Even though Finch does some despicable things to get ahead, we never stop cheering for him. I have to admit, he was my first gay crush. It's so funny to see him today, at age 77 back in the business world as Bertram Cooper on MAD MEN.Supporting actors, notably the women, like cute, perky Michele Lee (as Rosemary), commandingly funny Ruth Kobart (as Miss Jones) and the outrageously curvaceous Maureen Arthur (as Hedy LaRue) are also a joy to watch. One wonders why Kobart and Arthur didn't become bigger stars after this film.The music by Frank Loesser is quite enjoyable, with some great hummable tunes-but this story could almost work without the musical numbers. What makes this film work is the look. With brilliant color design by Disney legend Mary Blair, the sets and costumes POP off the screen and into your living room. Here's a great clip:

Set in the oh so not politically correct 1960s, it's really MAD MEN meets 9 to 5 without the irony or righteousness. It's a celebration of the old school world of businessmen, where smoking, drinking and sexual harassment were all part of the work day. The rules may have changed over the years, but the back-stabbing, ass-kissing, nepotism and corporate politics still exist - just ask anyone who works for a certain nameless movie studio.

So, if you are looking to escape into a silly saccharin 60s screwball sitcom for two hours - I highly recommend either watching this film - or playing the board game!

Take the Good, Take The Bad

So today I found out that the California Supreme Court has decided that my gay marriage is still legal - only because I got married BEFORE a slim majority of voters decided to vote away the rights of others. Meanwhile, dear friends of mine who were married AFTER election day are instantly divorced. Is this America? I've said this before...human rights should not be left up to a popular vote. My right to marry is not a singing contest or a reality show. Unfortunately the only way to overturn Prop 8 now is another damn ballot measure. Just imagine if all the money that has gone into both sides of this debate was used to help sick or poor people??? It just makes me sick that people who call themselves Christian would rather prevent two people who love each from marrying than feed and clothe people in need. Really, what would Jesus do?

50 is the New 17

What do these diverse celebrities have in common? Danny Bonaduce, Judd Nelson, Kyle MacLachlan, Lydia Lunch, Mackenzie Phillips, Marie Osmond, Perry Farrell, Rosanna Arquette, Sheena Easton, Val Kilmer, Apollonia, Vanity, Sade and Barbie®?That's right they are all somewhat plastic and have all been in rehab. Just kidding!!! Actually, that might be true, but what I'm getting at is they are all turning 50 this year!Yes, the Barbie Doll is 50 years old - and she doesn't look a day over 17! She's still long limbed, shapely and beautiful, and still only 11" tall. Barbie’s measurements are 5 inches (bust), 3¼ inches (waist), 5 3/16 inches (hips). Her weight is 7.25 ounces!Ruth and Elliot Handler of Mattel Toys launched the fabulous fashion doll named after their own daughter, Barbie - 50 years ago. Barbie's full name is Barbie Millicent Roberts. (Pictured below is a TV Guide advertisement telling you when a TV advertisement for Talking Barbie is going to air - an ad for an ad - how odd!)And strangely, Barbie's soon to be boyfriend Ken, was named after their son. Um, that's kinda gross. (Below is an issue of Dell Comic's BARBIE AND KEN, detailing their European tour, where Barbie almost discovered that Ken was her brother!!!)

By the late 1960s, her adoring public purchased $500 million worth of Barbie products.  And not just dolls - but other cool stuff like records... (Six teen-age tunes sung by Barbie and Ken! I wonder what that sounds like?)

and phones...(How cool is this pink Barbie phone? And not that yucky modern PMS 219  "Barbie pink", but real girl-ish 1960s pink!)
Oddly enough, Barbie has never been married , apparently she just likes to model wedding gowns and leaves Ken at the altar repeatedly. Barbie has managed to keep up with current trends in hairstyles, makeup and clothing, becoming a reflection of the history of fashion and style - for better or worse!The best-selling Barbie doll ever was the freakish white-trashy 1992 Totally Hair Barbie®, with hair from the top of her head to her toes.My sister had this very same Dream House and I was never allowed to play with it. I guess they'd though I'd turn out gay if I played with Barbie. Um, guess what? (Check out that stylish brick fireplace below!)Well, happy 50th birthday to the girl who has it all, has been it all from schoolteacher to astronaut (Barbie has had more than 108 careers and has been a presidential candidate four times as an Independent candidate!) and most all all, always a great Malibu tan.

Will we see fireworks?

I certainly hope so.

Michael Phelps' Next Product Endorsement?

If Olympic champion and reluctant "role model" for America's youth was photographed drinking a beer, it would  have been a product endorsement. They (the media) say he may lose some of his product sponsorships because of this so-called "scandal". So I wonder what's up next for young Mr. Phelps? Maybe U.S. Bongs is looking for an all-American spokesperson to replace retiring Uncle Sam? I could picture it now...

Happy Belated Birthday, Betty White

Damn! I totally intended to run this on Ms. White's birthday on January 17 - but I guess something suddenly came up. Well, here it is, two weeks late. Happy Birthday to our favorite old broad. Whether she's baking pies and acting all sexy on MARY TYLER MOORE or dumb and dumber on GOLDEN GIRLS-Betty is a real class act. We love her on soaps (ANOTHER WORLD, BOLD & THE BEAUTIFUL) , game shows (PASSWORD), talk shows (ELLEN), even in movies (LAKE PLACID). I wish more old people would be as cool as Betty White. I wonder if Fox will ever release her short-lived, fondly-remembered 1970s THE BETTY WHITE SHOW on dvd. Well, cheers to Betty - 87 years young and still making us smile! Here a fun clip from before the election. The set up here is that Betty is John McCain's speechwriter.

Here Comes the Prez

Prez Says: Cool it, man! You had your chance!

The One and Only, Genuine, Original Family Band

You'd think I would have learned my lesson with THE HAPPIEST MILLIONAIRE. Well, here's another late 1960s musical from the Disney studios (directed by TV western vet Michael O'Herlihy) featuring subpar Sherman Brothers songs and performances by Lesley Ann Warren and John Davidson. Once again, Warren and Davidson are young lovers. She's again the eldest daughter of a wacky family (they have a band-hence the title) and he's the handsome suitor that someone in the family doesn't approve of. Just like in MILLIONAIRE, her father is portrayed by another beloved TV star (Buddy Ebsen), and the mother character (Janet Blair) is sadly underdeveloped. Seems like awfully familiar territory. Like MILLIONAIRE, it's also based on a true story!The difference this time around is that Grandfather Bower (Walter Brennan) is the problem. You see, Civil War vet gramps is a staunch Democrat - he's even written a song honoring President Grover Cleveland for the 1888 Democratic Convention which he wants the "family band" (including a young Kurt Russell) to perform. Only young Republican Joe Carder (Davidson) shows up and one by one seduces the family (not literally) with the notion that they should pick up and move to Dakota. The family moves and the political division between the family members intensifies when the old coot starts preaching to anyone who'll listen about how evil Republicans are. Normally I would agree with him, but the character is so pathetic and annoying that you just kind feel sorry for him. Grandpa really gets his knickers twisted when the Dakotans decide to split their territory into two states, thereby doubling their amount of Republican senators!You might be asking - does this really subject really make for a fun, freewheeling family musical? My answer is a resounding NO. As I continued to watch, I wondered - just where the HELL is this One and Only, Genuine, Original Family Band I was promised? I was expecting a silly, mindless comedy about a 19th century Partridge Family, but what I got was two long hours of an old man whining about political issues that seem relatively simple compared to what we have going on the states today. I guess it might have been interesting in 1968, but 40 years later it just seems un-entertaining. Once again, as with MILLIONAIRE, I wonder who the studio was aiming this film at - kids certainly could not care less about these political issues. There were no cute fluffy animals or magical British nannies to be seen - just a lot of yelling and pontificating about how politics should never be discussed in the home.It was fun seeing a young Goldie Hawn (at 1 hour and 32 minutes in) in a small role (though it would have been fun to see her interact with future lover Kurt) and other child stars like Pamelyn Ferdin (THE ODD COUPLE) and Jon Walmsley (THE WALTONS) as members of The Family Band, but overall this effort was a major disappointment - I guess I still haven't found what I'm looking for in terms of a Disney musical that even comes close to be being as wonderful as MARY POPPINS.

Hollywood Liberals vs. Real Americans

If you believe the GOP (and by the results of last week's election - very few do)–there are two Americas: them & us. Basically it's the big city folk verses the country bumpkins. Wouldn't it be great if some TV network took a well-balanced in-depth look at this issue? It would require two big hours of prime-time to fairly cover such a broad range of topics. Viewers could choose a side and maybe by the end of the program, see what it would be like to walk in the other's shoes. Well, back in 1980 NBC already did this. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you... the CITY VS. COUNTRY SHOWDOWN!
Yes, that's right, hosted by QUINCY himself, Jack Klugman - two teams of "celebrities" competed in stunts such as  country "chores" like chasing a greased pig, milking a cow, and throwing hay bales. Yee-haa! To balance things out, several "city" events like basketball, jump rope and "chicken fights" in a swimming pool were also mounted. How urban! This makes US AGAINST THE WORLD sound positively riveting.  The "City" team included Charlene (DALLAS) Tilton (I would have thunk she was country!), Larry (CHiPs) Wilcox, Bowzer from Sha Na Na, Linda (DYNASTY) Evans and Grant (EIGHT IS ENOUGH) Goodeve. The "Country" team featured Tanya (TNT) Tucker, Melissa (LITTLE HOUSE) Gilbert, Glen Campbell, Barbi (HEE HAW) Benton and Susan (GOLDENGIRL) Anton. More than 20 Hollywood Stars!!! Wow - what a trainwreck! I wish I had this on VHS - Does anybody out there have it??? This would make a great Thanksgiving viewing party.

How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying

After all that's been going on in the world (and in my life) for the past few days, I decided I needed to just relax and enjoy a good, simple, mindless old-fashioned musical.

What's more simple and mindless than the film version of the broadway classic,

HOW TO SUCCEED IN BUSINESS WITHOUT REALLY TRYING? (1967, directed by David Swift) Well, there's probably dumber and less complex movies out there, but somehow the story of overly ambitious J. Pierpont Finch's meteoric rise from window-washer to chairman of the board was just what I needed!I remember watching this film when it was on TV in the 1970s and loving every minute of it. It's easy to see why - Robert Morse as Finch is a grinning, grimacing, galloping gremlin - like a cartoon character come to life. His body language, his manic energy and innocent, yet seductive charm make him possibly one of the most magnetically watchable cinematic characters ever. Even though Finch does some despicable things to get ahead, we never stop cheering for him. I have to admit, he was my first gay crush. It's so funny to see him today, at age 77 back in the business world as Bertram Cooper on MAD MEN.Supporting actors, notably the women, like cute, perky Michele Lee (as Rosemary), commandingly funny Ruth Kobart (as Miss Jones) and the outrageously curvaceous Maureen Arthur (as Hedy LaRue) are also a joy to watch. One wonders why Kobart and Arthur didn't become bigger stars after this film.The music by Frank Loesser is quite enjoyable, with some great hummable tunes-but this story could almost work without the musical numbers. What makes this film work is the look. With brilliant color design by Disney legend Mary Blair, the sets and costumes POP off the screen and into your living room. Here's a great clip:

Set in the oh so not politically correct 1960s, it's really MAD MEN meets 9 to 5 without the irony or righteousness. It's a celebration of the old school world of businessmen, where smoking, drinking and sexual harassment were all part of the work day. The rules may have changed over the years, but the back-stabbing, ass-kissing, nepotism and corporate politics still exist - just ask anyone who works for a certain nameless movie studio.

So, if you are looking to escape into a silly saccharin 60s screwball sitcom for two hours - I highly recommend either watching this film - or playing the board game!

GAY RAGE

The Church of Latter Day Saints, Focus on the Family, the Knights of Columbus, the American Family Association and all the 52% of Californians who supported Prop 8 - you cannot take away our RIGHTS and not expect RAGE. This fight is FAR from over. The Holy War has just begun, and RAGE is gonna kick your asses. Better start praying. Oh, by the way, this has NOTHING to do with Jesus, school children or taxes. It has to do with bigotry, hatred and lies. 

VOTE, BITCHES, VOTE!!!

VOTE as if your life depends on it.

Okay, readers. I woke up today to find that my NO ON 8 lawn sign had been stolen overnight. For those of you who do not live in the state of California, Proposition 8 is

a ballot measure that would overturn state law and make same-sex marriage (which is now LEGAL in California) illegal. This proposition has been heavily funded by the Mormon Church (which doesn't even have a strong presence in the state) and the Catholic "charity" group Knights of Columbus. These two "Christian" groups and other contributors have spent way over $50 million dollars that could have been spent helping poor, hungry or sick people (you know, the kind of people Jesus cared about) - to take away MY RIGHTS as an American. And now, they have taken away MY freedom of speech by absconding my lawn sign. The lies and misinformation the YES ON 8 campaign has been spreading makes me sick. Claiming that churches will lose their tax-free status (which I think they SHOULD) and that the poor little children will be taught about gay marriage in public school (no - they'll learn about it from their own bigoted parents) - are all lies. So - if you live in California and haven't voted yet, please VOTE NO ON 8 - vote against discrimination, vote for equality, vote against the religious right and vote for fairness. Why should MY marriage make your marriage any less valid - and to think Mormons are critical of anyone else's marital rights!!! Don't get me started.

...and VOTE OBAMA!!!

PS...ignore the  YES ON 8 "public service" Ad that Google placed below - I'm trying to have it removed!

HOLY MISMATRIMONY! EMERGENCY 'NO ON 8' FUNDRAISER

Come Out and Join Us This Thursday September 23 at 8PM for a Special "No On Prop 8" Edition of THE MISMATCH GAME!!!

Laugh along as we send-up the classic TV game show and raise $$$ to combat the evil forces that want to make gay marriage illegal in California. Basically - they want to take away a right that we ALREADY HAVE! WTF? Can't these people deal with their own fucked-up lives and leave us alone? There's sure to be some timely politically charged humor as well questions about the latest celebrity bullshit. Madonna's divorce, anyone?

Hosted by DENNIS HENSLEY with an All-Star Cast including...
TED BIASELLI as Miss Piggy
DREW DROEGE as Karen Black
JOHN CARROZZA as Greg Evigan
MADELINE LONG as Shelley Winters
TOM LENK as Heidi Klum
NADYA GINSBURG as Cher
SAM PANCAKE as Lisa Whelchel
JACK PLOTNICK as Evie Harris
FELIX PIRE as Ricardo Montalban

DOUGSPLOITATION (that's me!) will also be there working the line and recruiting contestants! YOU can play on stage with the stars - and win fabulous prizes! There may be other special guests and surprises as well!

ONE NIGHT ONLY!
Thursday, October 23 at 8pm
at the Renberg Theatre
1125 N. McCadden Place, Hollywood, USA
(one block east of Highland, just north of Santa Monica Blvd.)

All proceeds go to benefit the ‘NO on 8’ Campaign to help secure Marriage Equality in California.

Tickets $25
Call 323-860-7300 or Buy tickets ONLINE at: www.lagaycenter.org/boxoffice

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