Ruby

Here's a re-post from 2009... My friend Jeff came by recently to treat me to a movie called RUBY (1977, directed by the late great, underrated Curtis Harrington). This is a film that I've been dying to see for ages, but for some reason or another I never did. Well, I'm glad to say, RUBY was worth the wait!

RUBY stars the awesome Piper Laurie (best known as CARRIE's mother and a star of David Lynch's TV classic TWIN PEAKS) in the role of a lifetime. Marketed as a horror film to capitalize on Laurie's CARRIE success, RUBY is more of a "slightly less than grand" guignol melodrama with some thrilling and hysterical twists. Harrington's other big films, the Shelley Winters double feature WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH HELEN? and WHOEVER SLEW AUNTIE ROO? are camp classics and his TV films HOW AWFUL ABOUT ALLAN  and DEVIL DOG: HOUND FROM HELL are also fun. I also recently watched THE KILLING KIND and look forward to seeing the rest of his work. I'm never disappointed by Curtis Harrington!

In RUBY, Harrington blends elements of SUNSET BOULEVARD, BONNIE & CLYDE and THE EXORCIST and it somehow all works! As Ruby, a former moll who runs a dying drive-in theater, Laurie not only chews the scenery - she practically digests it!!! This woman is having a great time onscreen, and you can't help but love her.

I don't want to give too much away because I think people need to see RUBY, but take a gander at the trailer and I'm sure you'll be seeking out RUBY before too long.

Seeing that just made me just wanna watch it again...and again. This is what movies should be like.

THE BEGUILED

After Clint Eastwood's puzzling appearance at the RNC the other night, here's a post from 2008 harking back to the days of a kinder, gentler, saner Clint.
Part Civil War epic, part baroque melodrama, part dirty soap opera, part gothic horror movie, part gender politics study and part Brothers Grimm fairy tale: THE BEGUILED (directed by Don Siegel) stars Clint Eastwood in his most intriguing and unusual role since he was elected mayor of Carmel, Ca.

After the requisite montage of real Civil War atrocities via sepia-tinted black and white photos...we arrive somewhere in Louisiana during the last days of the Civil War. Eastwood is John McBurney, a Yankee soldier who is near death after falling out of a tree. My guess is that he was hiding up there when he was shot.

A 12 year old girl named Amy (Pamelyn Ferdin, Edna Unger from TV's ODD COUPLE) is out picking mushrooms and discovers his severely wounded body. They talk, exchange names and cell phone numbers, and just before the girl helps him to stand, he tells her she's "old enough to kiss a man" and pulls her down beside him and gives her a long, hard kiss on the mouth. Huh??? She's confused, but happy. I'm confused and kinda grossed out. She then drags him to the mansion on a old plantation that serves as an all-girls school, where "McB" slowly regains his health under the care of sexually repressed headmistress Martha Farnsworth (Geraldine Page) and the horny girl students who live there. Sort of like when Blair first dragged Jo back to the Eastland school where sexually repressed Mrs. Garrett welcomed her with open arms.

Martha puts her skeptical slave Hallie in charge of washing him...above and below the waist! We are treated to hints of incest when Hallie dresses him in Martha's brother's shirt. Afraid of being turned over to the rebel forces, McB behaves like a polite and appreciative guest, after all he is a Quaker! As he gets healthier, he begins to charm (or beguile if you may) the love-starved students.

Soon the girls begin to vie for his affections, at first we think he's actually falling for virginal teacher Edwina (Elizabeth Hartman), but he seems to be inspiring jealousy among some of the others. This reminds me of Tatum O'Neal and Kristie McNichol both going after Matt Dillon in LITTLE DARLINGS. When one of the spurned girls tries to turn McB over to the Confederate army, Martha comes to his defense, claiming that he's her cousin from Texas. When McB tries to "thank" the headmistress for offering him a permanent residence at the school as the groundskeeper (replacing her brother) we witness a full flashback of Martha and and her lusty sibling getting it on. Donny and Marie Osmond they are not!

Following this we are then treated to Martha's wine-induced dream sequence, an eerie montage of McB frolicking with both Martha and Edwina, ending with a lesbian-tinged three-way that transforms itself into a painting of The Pieta. I swear...McB then gets to suck the nipple of one of the slutty girls - teenaged hussy Carol - leading to a an altercation with an enraged Edwina which ends with McB at the foot of the long circular staircase with a newly re-wounded leg. The battle of the sexes has begun!

SPOILERS START HERE. Martha has the girls harness him up and tie him to the dining room table- and announces that she plans to cut off his leg before it becomes infected with gangrene. What follows is some pretty brutal stuff, involving blood, knives, a saw, bloody hands, sweat, facial close-ups, more blood, blurry faces, a sweaty slave, more blood - you name it...

Clint flips out when he wakes up the next day without a leg, and he's now a prisoner rather than a welcomed guest. Amy tells McB that she loves him and he loves her back. I think she's 13 now. Somehow McB gets his hands on a gun - and now he has the upper hand...but only one leg!

After he threatens Hallie, we flashback to her being raped by Martha's brother. Charming fellow. McB then discovers the wine cellar, then he interrupts the girl's lunch with a drunken rant...and news that he has discovered love letters between Martha and her brother! When Amy tries to lighten things up, he flings her pet turtle across the room, killing it!!! Huh? After this hysteria, Martha convinces sweet, innocent Amy to put down the bloody turtle and gather up some yummy mushrooms for the evening's dinner.

At dinner, McB apologizes for his drunken behavior, leads the table in prayer and and announces his intention to marry Edwina, but it is too late...he's been poisoned by Amy's mushrooms!!! Clint realizes this and slowly gets up from the table and struggles to leave the room. Martha demands that the girls leave him be and finish their dinner. They do. He tumbles to the ground off camera and dies. Next the girls wrap up his body and carry it outside the gate to dump it. The end.

This movie is brilliant. I'm not much of an Eastwood fan, but between this and PLAY MISTY FOR ME, I gotta say - he really knew how to pick 'em back them. Great acting from Clint, Page and Hartman also set this film apart from the pack. THE BEGUILED gets a big 10 outta 10 in my book. In an odd coincidence, two of the actresses, Elizabeth Hartman and Geraldine Page, died in the same week. Hartman died on June 10, 1987 after jumping out of an 5-story window in an apparent suicide. Page died on June 13, 1987 of a heart attack. Sad.

Rainy Day Movie : THE BEGUILED

When people talk about their favorite Clint Eastwood film, they usually list DIRTY HARRY, a spaghetti western or one of the "important" films that he's made in recent years. My favorite is
THE BEGUILED, which I first reviewed here two years ago. Part Civil War epic, part baroque melodrama, part dirty soap opera, part gothic horror movie, part gender politics study and part Brothers Grimm fairy tale: THE BEGUILED (directed by Don Siegel) stars Clint Eastwood in his most intriguing and unusual role since he was elected mayor of Carmel, Ca.


















After the requisite montage of real Civil War atrocities via sepia-tinted black and white photos...we arrive somewhere in Louisiana during the last days of the Civil War. Eastwood is John McBurney, a Yankee soldier who is near death after falling out of a tree. My guess is that he was hiding up there when he was shot.

A 12 year old girl named Amy (Pamelyn Ferdin, Edna Unger from TV's ODD COUPLE) is out picking mushrooms and discovers his severely wounded body. They talk, exchange names and cell phone numbers, and just before the girl helps him to stand, he tells her she's "old enough to kiss a man" and pulls her down beside him and gives her a long, hard kiss on the mouth. Huh??? She's confused, but happy. I'm confused and kinda grossed out. She then drags him to the mansion on a old plantation that serves as an all-girls school, where "McB" slowly regains his health under the care of sexually repressed headmistress Martha Farnsworth (Geraldine Page) and the horny girl students who live there. Sort of like when Blair first dragged Jo back to the Eastland school where sexually repressed Mrs. Garrett welcomed her with open arms.













Martha puts her skeptical slave Hallie in charge of washing him...above and below the waist! We are treated to hints of incest when Hallie dresses him in Martha's brother's shirt. Afraid of being turned over to the rebel forces, McB behaves like a polite and appreciative guest, after all he is a Quaker! As he gets healthier, he begins to charm (or beguile if you may) the love-starved students.

Soon the girls begin to vie for his affections, at first we think he's actually falling for virginal teacher Edwina (Elizabeth Hartman), but he seems to be inspiring jealousy among some of the others. This reminds me of Tatum O'Neal and Kristie McNichol both going after Matt Dillon in LITTLE DARLINGS. When one of the spurned girls tries to turn McB over to the Confederate army, Martha comes to his defense, claiming that he's her cousin from Texas. When McB tries to "thank" the headmistress for offering him a permanent residence at the school as the groundskeeper (replacing her brother) we witness a full flashback of Martha and and her lusty sibling getting it on. Donny and Marie Osmond they are not!

Following this we are then treated to Martha's wine-induced dream sequence, an eerie montage of McB frolicking with both Martha and Edwina, ending with a lesbian-tinged three-way that transforms itself into a painting of The Pieta. I swear...McB then gets to suck the nipple of one of the slutty girls - teenaged hussy Carol - leading to a an altercation with an enraged Edwina which ends with McB at the foot of the long circular staircase with a newly re-wounded leg. The battle of the sexes has begun!

SPOILERS START HERE. Martha has the girls harness him up and tie him to the dining room table- and announces that she plans to cut off his leg before it becomes infected with gangrene. What follows is some pretty brutal stuff, involving blood, knives, a saw, bloody hands, sweat, facial close-ups, more blood, blurry faces, a sweaty slave, more blood - you name it...













Clint flips out when he wakes up the next day without a leg, and he's now a prisoner rather than a welcomed guest. Amy tells McB that she loves him and he loves her back. I think she's 13 now. Somehow McB gets his hands on a gun - and now he has the upper hand...but only one leg!

After he threatens Hallie, we flashback to her being raped by Martha's brother. Charming fellow. McB then discovers the wine cellar, then he interrupts the girl's lunch with a drunken rant...and news that he has discovered love letters between Martha and her brother! When Amy tries to lighten things up, he flings her pet turtle across the room, killing it!!! Huh? After this hysteria, Martha convinces sweet, innocent Amy to put down the bloody turtle and gather up some yummy mushrooms for the evening's dinner.

At dinner, McB apologizes for his drunken behavior, leads the table in prayer and and announces his intention to marry Edwina, but it is too late...he's been poisoned by Amy's mushrooms!!! Clint realizes this and slowly gets up from the table and struggles to leave the room. Martha demands that the girls leave him be and finish their dinner. They do. He tumbles to the ground off camera and dies. Next the girls wrap up his body and carry it outside the gate to dump it. The end.













This movie is brilliant. I'm not much of an Eastwood fan, but between this and PLAY MISTY FOR ME, I gotta say - he really knew how to pick 'em back them. Great acting from Clint, Page and Hartman also set this film apart from the pack. THE BEGUILED gets a big 10 outta 10 in my book. In an odd coincidence, two of the actresses, Elizabeth Hartman and Geraldine Page, died in the same week. Hartman died on June 10, 1987 after jumping out of an 5-story window in an apparent suicide. Page died on June 13, 1987 of a heart attack. Sad.

HOW AWFUL ABOUT ALLAN

Joan Crawford, Bette Davis, Olivia DeHavilland, Shelley Winters, Agnes Moorehead, Tallulah Bankhead, Geraldine Page, Ruth Gordon - these were the women of Grand Guignol - macabre cinematic tales of subtle terror and sudden shocks starring faded Hollywood stars who were ripe for a comeback vehicle. But what if a man starred as the victims in one of these twisted tales?

That would bring us to Anthony Perkins starring in HOW AWFUL ABOUT ALLAN, directed by Curtis Harrington ( also WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH HELEN? and WHOEVER SLEW AUNTIE ROO?) and produced by Aaron Spelling for the ABC MOVIE OF THE WEEK.

Perkins plays Allan, who has been blinded in a fire that killed his brilliant father and left his sister Katherine (Julie Harris) disfigured. Allan is in a hospital and declares that he doesn't want to see anyone. Has he forgotten about his blindness? After 8 months, he's released from the hospital and goes home to live with Katherine, who wears a big pink plastic patch over her burn scar. She tells Allan that she has been renting out rooms to students to help pay the bills. She has closed off the room where Daddy got cooked. Allan begins recording a diary about all the fun he's having since his return home. He seems to spend most of his time drinking coffee and modeling pajamas for his ex fiancee Olive (Joan Hackett from THE LAST OF SHEILA - dressing like Eliza Doolittle here).

Allan's sight still isn't perfect (he sees things as if he were looking through a bumpy piece of frosted glass) and the new whispering "roomer" Harold Dennis makes him as uncomfortable as the wallpaper in the house makes us. I've decide to nickname this film I HEARD A ROOMER.

Allan decides to find out more about this college student, so STILL PARTIALLY BLINDED, he gets behind the wheel of his car and drives to the nearby campus, causing a few accidents. Back home, Allan figures out that the student isn't real , but maybe he's Katherine's lover Eric Walters! Lots creepy shadows appear inside the house (ghosts?) and then Allan cuts his hand on a carving knife. Olive the ex comes to his rescue.

Later, there is a storm and blind Allan winds up outside in the rain - and pinned under a downed tree. We now flashback to his childhood and witness the abuse and torment foisted upon him by his father and sister! What a couple of evil bastards those two are!

The whole thing leads to a climax that is a homage to PSYCHO - right down to the swinging light fixture -and the killer and his/her motives are revealed. Shocking! Not.

ALLAN is fun little footnote that is worth watching (if you can find it). It probably would have been a lot more fun with a old woman in the lead role, but I guess Aaron Spelling hadn't hooked up with Joan Collins yet. I'll give it 7 out 10 "Huhs?"