Long before the madness known as
AMERICAN GIRL became our latest national nightmare, young girls (and some adventurous boys) imagined themselves living in the pioneer world of LITTLE HOUSE ON THE PRAIRIE. Yes, there were kids who actually enjoyed making believe they worked the fields in Walnut Grove, taught in a school for the blind and battled the devil incarnate herself,
Nellie Oleson. Melissa Gilbert as Laura Ingalls Wilder was extremely cute, but it didn't hurt your teeth to look at her (like many other sugary child stars of the 1970s). She had a sweet, wholesome and believable cuteness that kept us tuning in on Monday nights, even into the 1980s when Laura had a husband and kids of her own.

So why then, did they make a Halloween mask that made her look more like, um...Perez Hilton?

Poor "Half Pint".