It looks like "Idiocracy" has already arrived.

It's amazing the things that people will do to wreck their lives, and the statements they'll make after the fact.

For example, this article about a man who got "frisky" with his co-worker's water bottle is filled with unintentional comedic gems.

Consider the defendant's explanation, to wit -

"Lallana explained, "It was the closest I could ever get to someone as good looking as that without tampering with my marriage ...."

I wonder how that's working out for him.  Putting aside the yuch! factor of what he did, did his wife castrate him for essentially saying that he had to settle for her because he couldn't get close to anyone "hot" without committing a depraved sex assault?

Then there is the victim's approach to criminal forensics -

Tiffany testified she threw the water bottle away that January. But after the second time in April, she kept the fouled liquid and asked her fiancee put his semen in a water bottle to see if that's what she had tasted at work.


"At the time, I had no idea how else to figure out what this was," she testified."

Two questions:

A. Really????

and

B. Really????