BIG BUTCHA - Bloodstainz LP

Tardcore gangsta rap/hip hop ,from a wannabe juggalo. This 14 year old kid sounds almost just like Andy Milonakis ,a far cry from anything Inane Clown Pussies have ever done. And that's no diss ,as I look at Andy Milonakis ,as one of the funniest rappers ,ever! And Big Butcha is right up there with him.But ,enough with the comparisons ,this shit flat out rules! Whether you like rap ,or hate it ,this is both a tribute ,and a parody/mockery of rap music.One of the best things I've heard in a while!

CLICK HERE: http://archive.org/download/BigButcha-BloodstainzLp_181/BigButcha-BloodstainzLp.zip

THE BLOOD RED OSCARS / TEENAGE MUSTACHE - Mixed Marshmallow Arts Split Album Soup

A brand new split release from Seattle's Dead Ken Frilly and his one-man band Teenage Mustache ,and old-time tardcore king ,Satan Peabody and his one-man band ,The Blood Red Oscars! Teenage Mustache is funny ass stupid shit ,more tardcore than usual,with a cover of Black Sabbath. My pick hit here is ,"Vacationing On The Sun" ,but the whole thing is great! The Blood Red Oscars ,return to recording ,besides appearing on compilations for the last few years ,this is the first full-length (oh,yeah ,it's a split!) ,of new shit from Satan Peabody ,in years!!
5 songs are covers of :Beat Happening ,Motley Crue ,Bobby McFerrin ,LMFAO ,and Sockeye! Along with 8 new original songs ,including the hit ,"It's 2012 ,Punch A Mayan In The Face".
If you don't laugh while listening to this disc , you should probably check your pulse! Stay tuned for more ,from both bands! Please leave comments ,reviews ,complaints ,and nude photos ,in the comment box below ,thanks you ,punk. Oi Oi!!
CLICK HERE: https://sluggishatapes.bandcamp.com/album/blood-red-oscars-teenage-mustache-mixed-marshmallow-arts-split-album-soup 

THE GRATEFUL DEAD KENNEDYS - In Glob We Trust

The sophmore release from Food and Noah's tardcore ensemble ! Matches the first release in stupidity and ingenuity! Noah provides the awesome culturally iconic music samples ,while Food spews his tardo-matic lyrics and vocals all over it!This is gonna be in my mp3 player for months to come!! What more can I say? If you know the players ,if you know the band ,you know what to expect. If you have no idea what this crazy shit is ,or are a fan of Jerry or Jello ,this might be something that will change your life forever! Get the hard copy from Wheelchair Full Of Old Men Records or over at retardriot.com ,and tell 'em GOD sent ya!
CLICK HERE:
https://archive.org/download/TheGratefulDeadKennedys-InGlobWeTrust/TheGratefulDeadKennedys-InGlobWeTrust.zip

ICE CREAM SANDWICH SHIT HEAD - Take The Schlong Way Home

The latest from ICSSH! More of the acoustic tardcore stylings ,you've by now come to know and love (or hate!) A Sockeye cover and a Gimp/Catch 22 cover (some of the most mature playing and singing from this youngster ,yet!) to recommend this ,and songs about Ron Paul and a semi-cover of Bonnie Tyler ,plus dumber subjects ,to occupy your mind for 15 minutes ,or so. I'm proud of my pal ,Eric , for keeping up with releasing new music that almost nobody wants to hear. I've been doing it myself for years ,now!! This is great shit! Come and get it!!
CLICK HERE:
http://www.mediafire.com/?x1kjf098xruk19s

BLUE WAFFLE PUSSY - Swallowing Batteries For George Washington Christ

Eric , of the one-man-band, Ice Cream Sandwich Shithead or ICSSH , has this new band with his friend Kevin ,which is right up the same alley ,at the corner of tardcore and scumfuck. There are covers of GG Allin and scathing words for David Vincent ,Insane Clown Posse , The Rev ,and Euronymous! A joyride thru the New England region ,with your underwear on your head ,while masturbating to porn with your dad!! Fucking tardcore to the max ,and I mean stupid dum dum!
CLICK HERE:
http://www.mediafire.com/?sp4bp9q24d9y49c

ERIK AND THE PSYCHOS - Hey,Buttmonkey!

Discovered this on the web , a rare footnote in the annals of tardcore. This almost sounds like Ice Cream Sandwich Shit Head ,without his trademark acoustic guitar. The band is from New England. Erik, who is the frontman, pretty much did everything himself. The Psychos appear on only two tracks: "Freak-Out Musicians," and "Boogie Boo Boo." On this CD Erik plays a set of percussion instruments (a grill, a Mickey Mouse cup, a cardboard box) and throws in a few contemporary rock/pop culture soundbites for the hell-of-it. These are mainly used as segue pieces introducing each song. The CD is chock full of juvenile bathroom humor, esp. "The Cheese In My Shoe" and "Garbage Can Lids" -- these were the days of "Beevis and Butt-head" my friend. Unfortunately, Erik regrets it all. The Psychos have moved on and Erik refuses to even touch a drum set (or in this case, a Micky Mouse cup or a cardboard box). Recorded in 1995. Released Independently in 2000.It was all one track ,and I did my best to seperate the tracks,hopefully ,all is tard!
CLICK HERE:
http://www.mediafire.com/?xvx5h4g660ohe9k

CHEAP LITTLE TART

This cdr ,by way of Noah Lyon a/k/a Doctor Ninja a/k/a Rocky Dentist , is a blueprint of the commandments of tardcore punk. This is one of the dumbest albums you are ever likely to hear ,right in the same alleyway as bands on Wheelchair,(Food is sampled several times ,and some of his hits are given remixes) and Sluggisha ,but with a twist. The music is almost entirely made up of samples ,from pop-culture songs ,and punk alike. The vocals are either Noah ruminating on some stupid or crude subject matter or another ,or sampled vocals ,with much weirdness interspersed throughout ,and crazy and funny samples between songs. The final track is a bonus 20 minute live gig ,which is out of this world. This shit is the shit!Noah is having a book launch party ,Thursday, January 12th, 2012, 6-8 pm
Noah Lyon - THE COMPLEXITY OF STUFF book launch (wine, women and booze) at
Printed Matter Inc.195 Tenth Avenue,(btwn 22nd and 23rd St),New York, New York T: 212-925-0325 ,if you are near there you oughta go! His printed zines and buttons are top-sellers at the Printed Matter store.But this music is so retarded ,you might forget that a talented young genius artist ,is behind it all. Thanks ,Noah ,you rule!! from 2001 ltd to 100
CLICK HERE:
https://archive.org/download/CheapLittleTart/CheapLittleTart.zip

ICE CREAM SANDWICH SHIT HEAD - Guitarbage

Another great tardcore album from ICSSH! Funnier than ever before ,what with tales of strawberry Pop-Tarts , Phil Collins ,killing your parents,Bob Dylan,pickles and soiled diapers, and more weirdness. Johnny Cash is covered ,as well as Tommy James & the Shondells classic ,"I Think We're Alone Now"! Special guest ,Kevin ,does vocals on 2 songs ,one of which is a bonus track on this release(a GG Allin cover!),from an upcoming compilation,which will be posted here ,when it comes out next year! Stupid ,juvenile ,tardcore ,the kind which will make you wear Depends undergarments. Check youtube for his live videos! crappyatlife
CLICK HERE:
http://www.mediafire.com/?0dhzhpracc5b5a1

ICE CREAM SANDWICH SHIT HEAD - Huffing Butane For A Better Tomorrow

This piece of tardcore newness ,comes from crappyatlife ,over at Youtube. An acoustic set ,of short tunes (The longest is a cover of "Digestion" ,by Boy In Love) , that show off this guy's (Eric Crapton),tardly prowess.We can only hope he keeps huffing butane ,and decides to send in more songs! For now ,enjoy this moronic excuse for music!
CLICK HERE:
http://www.mediafire.com/?62gfuxij632ctru

JOHNNY SOCKO - Bovaquarium

Another lower-rung ska band ,this time from Indiana. Some stupid lyrics,that may make you laugh a little. The music is not really up to par with most 3rd wave ska bands. A few skits provide relief ,albeit briefly , from their tunes.
CLICK HERE:
http://www.mediafire.com/?jxor7lp11zsnj9t

THE DICK PANTHERS - Norwegian Wood

This ends with a skit ,that sounds like the characters from the other disc below ,some fucked up fellas.The music and vocals here ,are great as on all their stuff ,and weird and stupid. I think you will enjoy the full Dick Panthers catalog ,I recommend it very highly! In the highest!I bet these guys are pro musicians,havin' some beers,and doodlin' around! Like the Beatles of our generation ,or something! And the art and notes in all the zips of these guys,is fab!
CLICK HERE:
http://www.mediafire.com/?wqp0u7ltqclcqol

FEEBLE AXIS

The music on this amazingly dumb tardcore punk release , by my amigo ,Food Fortunata , alternates from crazy keyboardy/drum machine stuff , to acoustic guitar ( on one track ,I think?) ,to standard guitar ,bass ,drums ,vocals thingy ,and back again! Most tunes are under 2 minutes in length,while a few strain to make a minute! The lyrics and vocals ,are totally funny , as always ,when Food is at the helm! Really stupid! Sample lyric from , "Egg Planned" , : "Do you like eggplant? , no,no,no, I like eggplant too!" , and from "Training Pants ," John put a bullet in my poop , John cleared his throat like Augustus Gloop". Need I say more!!
CLICK HERE:
http://www.mediafire.com/?1ir5v7p0fnj8cvp

STORE BOUGHTEN TEETH - I Am An Adult

More tardcore punk ,from my buddy Food of Wheelchair Records. As usual ,funny and stupid stuff ,from one of the leading purveyors of dumb rock. 10 songs in 19 minutes ,and songs titled stuff like ,"A Hippy Ate My Cole Slaw" , "I Am Richard Speck" , and "Dentistry Is A Lie" ,how can you deny yourself the happiness and joy this short disc will bring to your life?! Great thing ,this is!Thanks Food!
CLICK HERE:
http://www.mediafire.com/?jhhy28llf715cca

SACKTAP - Stupid Is Born Every Second

One of the dumbest bands of all time!  ,there is much to redeem this,their second LP.(The first one, self-titled,is available on this here blog,somewhweres).You have some poetry readings,some of their trademark Jazz/scat numbers,some more episodes of The Bob and Jerry show,parodies of 70's/80's TV commercials,crazy instrumentals that will trip you out (wear headphones!),a drum solo with a fat guy snoring on top of it,and covers of : The Misfits (Brian "Snax" Siders (R.I.P.) on drums and back-up vocals),Motorhead, 7 Seconds, and Black Flag! There are also some terrible songs,that are some of the worst pieces of shit you may ever hear.Or not!Total Tardcore madness!Fuckin'dumb!

CLICK HERE: https://archive.org/download/Sacktap-StupidIsBornEverySecond/744Sacktap-StupidIsBornEverySecond.zip 

ANDY MILONAKIS -Hot Soup + Bonus Tracks

Hot Soup is Andy's latest stuff.I included a ton of earlier cuts,from all different time frames.All the tracks are mixed up,as I compiled them.Total tard-rap,funniest shit ,besides Tom Green ,in the rap world.He works with J Kwon,Major Lazer,Kool Kojak,Dirt Nasty,Rich Hil,and others.Even if you hate rap,check this out,it's a riot!Only time I ever heard a rap song sample John Cooper Clarke,on "Chickentown"(Joel,you simply must hear this cut!!)
CLICK HERE:
http://www.mediafire.com/?ysen4g3s6w3co94

WC500-

In the making for over twenty years,we have reached the pinnacle of stupidity,at it's most gourmand,The 500th release of Wheelchair Full Of Old Men Records And Tapes,WC500!!!
Food Fortunata,proprietor of said label,put this best-of thing together,with help from friends and fans,who suggested songs for this comp,provided ideas and concepts,and artwork.Mine is numbered #9 of 50 ,one-of-a-kind,hand-made,special packaging,and it is a beaut,as you can see by the shots above. 89 songs on 3 discs,from a number of bands,most of which (unless you are a WCFOOM fan) ,you've most likely never heard of.This thing should be placed in a time capsule,so future generations can see ,how dumb the human race was.I praise my friend ,Food ,for his hard work and stamina at keeping this label going for over 20 years!! Many more to come,look here for some of the finest tardcore ever recorded,at the official home of Wheelchair on the web,Sluggisha!!!!!!!!!! Order this and send Food all of your money!
In 3 parts,get all to experience the feelings of extreme loneliness and hatred,and the funny looks,you will get from listening to this.One of the best releases of 2010, in this crazy reporter's view of the music scene as we now know it.
PART ONE CLICK HERE:http://www.mediafire.com/?4a2jmwv7ikb275f
PART TWO CLICK HERE:http://www.mediafire.com/?so49o6zw6bu6zom
PART THREE CLICK HERE:
http://www.mediafire.com/?u3tc5ei0pgtny6c

Z.A.T.H.- Zamboni Adventure Through Hell

A third release pops out of the ass of the tardcore machine,nay,institution,known as Z.A.T.H.

Once again Food and I, exchanged tunes,and added vocals on each others music.This is definitely the most experimental we've gotten as of yet.There are some straight-out songs,then there are mind-bending musics and vocals like you never heard before.This is about as stupid as it gets,what with tunes about, corduroy meatballs,chocolate teeth,baseball champions,monster trucks,the Residents,giant turtle vomit,cheeto eating mummies,and much more,no stone is left untur(ne)d.Great covers of a Devo song(Mongoloid),and one by German metal giants,Sodom(Volcanic Slut),these 26 ditties,will bring you to a higher state of ZATHness.I'm gonna lay down tracks for the next one,soon.As usual,Food did the artwork,as only he can.If you get this,grab our back catalog,as well.  https://zath2.bandcamp.com/album/zamboni-adventure-through-hell 

Z.A.T.H.-Zebra Amplified Turd Harpoon

This is the 2nd ZATH album,Freshly recorded over the last few weeks.once again,Food Fortunata (man of a thousand voices,and bands)sent me some music to sing on,and I sent music for him to sing on,If you wanna call what we do ,"singing".More of the fine stuff known as tardcore,round these parts,in this new installment.and look at that fine art piece above by Food,I mean that thing should be in a museum,freaking awesome dude! 3 versions of one Butthole Surfers song,and goofy ass vocals,with crazy churning music.were talkin' "THE" fucking pinnacle of stupidity here folks,don't attend their concerts,Peter Cetera is opening for them,ugh!Another swell product of Sluggisha and Wheelchair. P.S. bonus tracks are alternate takes of me singing on Food's music,slightly different delivery,and lyrics,and it was 3 a.m. and i was drunk out of my gourd!yes,there are an additional 2 more versions of a Butthole Surfers song,ha ha this may be better than the actual finished product,you can download it,as well,and add it to this for a one-two punch,that will make you protect your sack! -G O D
CLICK HERE: https://zath2.bandcamp.com/album/zebra-amplified-turd-harpoon 

HALLUCINATION REPAIRMEN-2-1/2 years of incompetence-a compilation

lo-fi,psych-punk stupidity,doesn't even begin to describe the wonderful hallucination repairmen.hailing from tx and nh,and distro'ed by wheechair,this is wunderbar.they have been on a few comps over the years(incl."fuck rush limbaugh 7" found on this blog!)and proven to be worthy of these ears!more is coming from food at wcfoom,soon!for now marinate on this a while!

CLICK HERE:

http://www.mediafire.com/?2ezqz2yjn5o

WHEELCHAIR FULL OF SLUGGISHA-a tardcore to the max compilation from food fortunata and satan peabody all new for 2009

The Sluggisha Tapes label started in 1990 with the advent of Cat Machine,although many bands already existed in our galaxy before Sluggisha or Cat Machine,and most are included in our canon of bands.This release represents some of the stupidest music ever recorded in history.Most of these bands and songs would be lost to the ages if not for this release.I've been in contact with my pal Food Fortunata for the last 15 years,and together we built this castle of crap that no one should ever have to listen to,as if they would ever want to.Includes 4 totally new unreleased tracks from the Blood Red Oscars,2 of which pay homage to Wheelchair bands,and the songs are exclusive to this comp. as are most tunes here.Funny,strange,bizzarre,hilarious,scary,and stupid are some of the things you might say after ingesting this.Don't be alarmed ,you are correct,this is tardcore!Brought to you by Sluggisha Tapes and Wheelchair Full Of Old Men Records and Tapes,and compiled by Satan Peabody and Food Fortunata.Art by Satan and Food.Here's what Food had to say about this release:

These 32 Wheelchair songs were chosen with the utmost care, when I was drunk and shit. What other way would be appropriate? Wheelchair started in 1987 and there was really no intention for it to continue any longer than it took to put out a tape or two that ultimately no one in the world wanted to hear, but for one reason or another, the shit just kept piling up and it has kept piling up for better than 2 decades. Sooner or later, I’m bound to lose interest in all this, but until that happens, enjoy the fruits of the labor of this union of morons. Love and kisses, Food Fortunata.

so here it is in all it's glory,"WHEELCHAIR FULL OF SLUGGISHA"!

CLICK HERE::  https://archive.org/download/WheelchairFullOfSluggisha-aTardcoreToTheMaxCompilationFromFood/157Va-WheelchairFullOfSluggisha.zip