The Unexpurgated Bible #152

And God said, “Let the waters under the heavens be 

gathered together into one place, and let the dry land

 appear.”

“It’s been really nice. It’s been a wonderful thing. It’s been 

beautiful. Have a good time everybody!”

Alex Witt Sez: ‘We’re seeing a remarkably different 

President in Houston. This one has such big hands!"

'White House Walks Back Promise about Trump Donating 

Sarah Huckabee Sanders to Hurricane Harvey'

Hey, Ted Cruz, it's been four years since you last shut

down the government. Now that Houston is underwater,

isn't it about time for you to do it again?

Texas Secessionists Go Silent, Thought to Be Underwater

Judging by the number of times he used the

 word, Trump evidently believes 'Thank' is

 cheaper by the dozen.

"Unlike Governor Christie, Senator McCarthy and I are

not desperate to stay in the news."

Unlike his mentor, he couldn't walk on water. But Joel 

Osteen did what he could.

Trump Boasts 'There’s Never Been Anything So Expensive 

in Our Country’s History' as Hurricane Harvey

Well, at least Melania wore an appropriate

hat when she toured the Texas flood zone.

Who needs FEMA and the Texas National Guard to deal 

with the Houston flood when you have Joel Osteen?

Relax, Houston, Mr. Sunshine has everything under control.

Trump Pardons Hurricane Harvey, Says It Was Only

Doing Its Job

Waiting for Dan Patrick to Claim Hurricane Harvey Is God's 

Punishment for the Texas Legislature's Failure to Pass the 

Bathroom Bill

Trump Sez: "Many people are now saying that this is the 

worst storm/hurricane they have ever seen. Good news is

 that we have great talent on the ground."

The Unexpurgated Bible #151

And when he saw his people being blown to kingdom come

 by the hurricane, Trump said, "Good luck to everybody!"