becoming four

We have no sense of routine or schedule yet.  So far I'm just enjoying Avett's cuddly baby ness and loving seeing Evie be a big sister.  Somedays are total disasters with major meltdowns and blowouts (literally and figuratively).  I congratulate myself if I manage to change out of my triple dried and crusted spit up shirt before John walks through the door from work.  And other days surprise me and I feel like I might know what I'm doing.  Yesterday I did 3 loads of laundry and put them away, did a load of dishes, and cooked dinner after a nature walk around outside with the two dressed kids!  

The transition to two feels natural but difficult.  There are a lot of moments where both babies are crying and need something and all I can do is sit on the floor and nurse one while I try to hold the other on my lap and I just look around and laugh. My mother always says, "Might as well laugh as to cry." It would be easy to feel overwhelmed and stressed out but I remember something that my mom told me a couple of weeks a go when I was worried about how I would get things done.  She told me that my only job right now is to hold and love my babies.  That's what I try to remember when I'm going throughout the day.

I just love being the mother to a little boy. I feel different about Avett than I do Evaleigh.  Obviously I love them the same amount but when I look at Avett I feel protective of him in a totally different way.    I'm not sure I know how to explain it yet but he's my son and I love having a little mini John Murphy.  

I feel like Evaleigh grew up over night when I was in the hospital in labor .  When she came to meet Avett she was walking around saying, "um, um, um."  The next day she learned the word princess and there have been new words every day since.  It was like all of the sudden she wasn't a baby anymore.  She is so helpful with getting diapers and trying to console her brother if he is crying.  

It's like we were always meant to be four.