number 3

I'll never forget the few hours after Avett was born.  I was overwhelmed and amazed at what my body had just done, and done so well! I was enraptured by my plump perfect 10 pound boy admiring every detail and tiny feature.  But almost immediately the oddest feeling came to me: it was an urgency of some sort.  Something as if to say that my 3rd child knew he or she was next in line, and the feeling was that they were ready. Ready to come on down and join the family too.  I couldn't shake it for a while and I tried, after all I had a merely hours old newborn in my arms! 

That feeling has come to me countless times since Avett joined our family.  It has been the strangest thing.  But somehow I know it's real.  I know that when ever and how ever number 3 comes to be that it will be a long awaited arrival by us all.  

Truth be told I'm not sure why our next baby is taking some extra time.  I go through waves of not caring one bit to disappointment and a bit of sadness.  But truly when it comes down to it I have complete and utter faith that it will happen when and how ever it is supposed to.  John and I are both terribly busy now and as we've talked and talked about it it seems that all of this waiting could be a form of a blessing in disguise. 

So we will wait.

And trust.

And enjoy what we have now.

Because what we've got going on now is pretty wonderful.  

This past weekend was spent with my sisters family and their 4 week old Mason, who is just perfection. My children were all over him and wanting to help and snuggle and take in his sweetness just as much as I wanted to.

I do believe one of the best gifts you can give your children are siblings and I want so badly to give them more.  More opportunites to grown and love and help and serve.  

They will be fantastic when and if that day comes. Time will tell and in the mean time we will savor what we have right here and right now. 

boy

Thanks for all of the love and excitement about baby #2!  We are so excited to bring a Murphy BOY in to this world.  Saturday was probably one of the happiest days in John Murphy's life.  I don't know that I've ever seen a smile on his face that big, not even on our wedding day...honestly.

  

Our appointment was at Stork Vision, which I highly recommend   They do gender ultrasounds as early as 16 weeks for a super affordable price, which is awesome for impatient people like me and Mr. Murphy.  We used them for finding out what Evaleigh was and I will keep using them for every baby after!

Our appointment was at 1pm that day, which was torture!!  Especially when your one year old wakes you up at 7:30 and you are counting down the hours and minutes until you can jump in the shower and go! When we got there they took us back almost immediately.  Evaleigh has an intense fear of doctors so she started crying horribly loud and dramatic.  I'm pretty sure she thought the ultrasound tech was going to hurt me.  John handed her to me and she laid her body across my chest, started patting my shoulder, and didn't move the entire time.

The tech started the ultrasound and John had his face 2 inches from the big screen tv where we could see it all.  The anticipation on his face was priceless.  When the goods popped up on the screen for just a minute he jumped back with a huge smile.  They came on again as clear as could be and before the tech could even get anything out of her mouth he said, "ITS A BOY!" and put his hands over his head as if he had just made the winning basket!  The ultrasound tech confirmed it and said, "That certainly is a boy.  I will literally quit my job if that isn't a boy, there is no mistaking it."  John was fist pumping and smiling and all sorts of crazy body movements that I don't think I've ever seen.

Every once in a while now he will pat my tummy and say, "My boy."  I can't wait to see him with our little guy.

If you missed it, our little video reveal is here.

weekend picnic

This weekend we met up with my dad at a park near the house and camped out under some tall oak trees for a few hours.  We played with the babies, had watermelon rine chucking contests, and ate subs and hummus.

Here are Evi's baby blues.  Don't mind my snaggle tooth in the next picture.

Dad was trying to get this baby to stand.  I'm not ready for that, my heart can't take it.  I let her suck some watermelon juice off of my finger and I swear I didn't think I was going to leave with all of my fingers in tact, she loved it.  Bekah brought her baby boy and I can't get enough of him.  I love seeing the babies together and imagining them being friends.

Evaleigh turned 4 months last week, I am working on her video.  I can't believe how fast the time is going!

He's here!!!

Welcome to the world little Parker. I love you so much.

Born to my sister and Joe on May the fourth.

I am so proud of my little sister.  She is a mother to a son.

Meeting him was pretty incredible.  My uterus burst into a tiny million pieces of hearts and flowers while my ovaries were exploding in to chants of "more babies more babies more babies!!!".  

I want more babies...now.

Its so crazy how quickly you forget how tiny they are.  My rotund baby looks preeeety huge next to Mr. Parker.  

Now is when the really fun parts of life start to happen.  I am so looking forward to watching our babies grow together to be friends.

parkers baby shower

Mr. Parker is coming to join us in just a month!  Remember when this happened?? 

That feels about 10 minutes ago.

But now he is coming to this world and I can't wait to be his auntie!

Thanks to Ashlyn for a few extra pictures!  (more pictures here...I found the foot ruiner...do I get a cookie for real??)

After everyone left we stayed outside until it got dark, and then we stayed outside some more and made a fire.  I don't think my feet went inside until 11:30pm.

I can't wait to meet that tiny baby!

Cloth Diaper Review

After trying about 6 different kind of cloth diapers  I'd like to offer up my opinions of them all.  

I ended up really just loving the prefolds with Thirsties covers.  Thirsties is a great American made product.  The most unique thing it offers are the gussets in the side which give extra protection against leaks.  

The Thirsties fitted was great for absorbency and held the poop well but I felt like it carried more odor.

The Fuzzibunz was AMAZING and I'd love to purchase some someday but they are a bit on the pricey side for me.  The material is hands down the softest thing and I would even like it on my bum.

I didn't like the Flip with the insert at all, it didn't really hold the poop in like the other covers and the material felt a little rough.

The newborn Kissaluv was just so small I ended up using it like a fitted diaper with a cover because it didn't absorb the poop as well as a prefold.  Even though I liked the feel of the material as much as the Fuzzibunz. Plus my baby was gaining weight really fast so she wouldn't get use out of it very long.

The Kissaluv aio was cool but I wasn't crazy about the material and it fit Evaleigh's bottom a little funny.

I didn't like Thisties pockets because I feel like that system would be way more laundry than just covers and prefolds. Not to mention more expensive. Although it is nice to throw a pocket in every once in a while when I don't feel like doing the 'work' of a prefold.

All in all covers, pre-folds and snappis are for us!  They are very affordable at the initial cost.  

No diaper rash and we haven't purchased a single diaper in a month and a half!

P.S. Thanks to Spearmint Baby for the sweet nursery feature!

wakey wakey eggs & bakey

Here is my wake-up call to you.  

Let's all try and be a little happier and a little more positive each and every day.

-Find a baby and give it a kiss.  (you can come kiss mine if you need to!)

-Stop worrying so much about how you look, I am here to tell you that you, YES YOU, are beautiful!

-Don't compare yourself to anyone else, there is something so wonderful about self confidence.  Learn to really like yourself.

-Take joy in the little successes. Like yesterday I may not have gotten to any of the laundry or printed off my long overdue thank you notes but dangit....I got a shower.

-Try to find the best in everyone, because its there I promise.

-Pray, a real long sincere prayer, everyday.

Be happy...it is a choice.

3 lovely things

1. My sleeping babe with exposed midriff. (not in a cloth diaper GASP! it was laundry day...)

2. A delicious snack of fresh strawberries, sour cream, and brown sugar.

3. A walk with Miss Evaleigh and bright red kisses.

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another baby!!!!

Remember this? 

If not, go now.  It will make you smile...or cry...or laugh...most likely laugh because I am sporting the ugly cry.

Well finally at 28 weeks this girl has a baby bump.  It took a while for that thing to get on out there but now its the cutest bump around!  She has the most ACTIVE little boy in there. I love him so much already and can't wait to have another little baby around.

I told her she has the pregnancy glow. 

She said, "No, its just the toaster effect on Instagram..."

No pretty sister, you've got your glow on.  

Now give me a nephew.

busy

I swear I'll make good on my promise of birth story part deux.  It has been a really busy week.

eat sleep poop eat sleep poop GO TO THE DOCTOR eat sleep poop poop some more eat eat eat eat eat eat sleep poop change 100 diapers SING JE VEUX VIVRE TO EVALEIGH WHILE SITTING ON THE TOILET (she loved it by the way) eat sleep HAVE A COMMUNITY MARATHON WITH MY HUSBAND AND EAT JUNK poop change diapers stare at my baby sleeping WATCH THE BACHELOR eat sleep poop READ COMMENTARY ON THE BACHELOR eat sleep poop change diapers MAKE HEADBANDS FOR EJ change diapers do some laundry  dont fold laundry CONTEMPLATE VALENTINES DAY GIFTS FOR JOHN eat eat eat poop diapers eat eat sleep pump READ FIRST PRESIDENCY MESSAGE TO EJ BEFORE BEDTIME change diapers watch ev smile

i love our life. really truly i do.

have a lovely weekend!

the day we gained new names- part 1

I'm not really sure how to begin this story of the most sacred day of our lives.  In fact I have tried to write it several times and have had trouble trying to get it out.  I'm positive that these simple words will not give that day the honor that it surely deserves, however I am going to attempt to recount that beautiful day before the precious details slip my mind.  The mere thought of the feelings and emotions that were present then make me cry.

***

Evaleigh had a mind of her own from the beginning.  I struggled quite a bit with the idea of having to deliver c-section due to Ev's breech presentation.  After much prayer and thought John and I decided that it was the best decision to try all that we could naturally to get her to turn.  We thought that if she made the turn on her own then we would proceed with our planned natural birth but if not, we would make what we believed to be the safest decision for our child and have the recommended scheduled Cesarean section birth.  

Our prayers changed from "Please help Evaleigh to turn so we can have a natural birth" to "Please keep her safe and let her be in whatever position is best for her."  Days would pass and still no change.  I began to prepare for my birth experience in a very different way than I had imagine my whole life.  It was difficult and not without many many tears and heartache.  After countless supportive and encouraging emails, messages, phone calls, and shared personal experiences from friends, I began to feel hope.  I felt hope that our birthing experience, come what may, would be nothing less because it was not a natural birth.

Monday night, the night before our scheduled c section, my sister and her husband came over and we all played cards until about midnight.  No big deal, we were just going to stay up late because its not like we were having a baby in the morning or anything.  We really enjoyed our last baby-free night.  I fully aniticipated to sleep horribly, much like Christmas Eve when you wake up at 3am and realize you have to go back to sleep and then again at 5 and 6:30 and then you can finally get out of bed at 8.  
I slept solid until 8am.  It was such a blessing.
My mother fixed everyone breakfast and I was forced to smell delicious bacon and bread and not eat anything because of the surgery.

I showered and everything was so surreal. We got everything ready and packed the car.  When John and I drove out of the driveway we held hands and and I said, "Next time we are on this driveway we will be 3."  We listened to soothing classical piano music the whole way there.  It was such a surreal drive.  We had driven those roads and highways hundreds and hundreds of times and this time felt the same, familiar and right.  The roads were leading us to our daughter.  We got to the hospital and left all of our things in the car.  It felt weird walking into the hospital with nothing but a purse on my shoulder, I felt like I needed more than that to accomplish this huge feat that was ahead of me.  But all I really needed was my body, my strong and capable body that had courageously held this beautiful baby for nearly 10 months. 
We checked in at the front desk and the excitement was bubbling up inside of me.  I sat there holding the hand of the man I made this child with; it felt perfect and whole and right.  My mother and sister arrived shortly after us and the nurses took me back to my pre-op room.  I swear the walk there was a mile or more.  Once we got inside I changed in to my hospital gown.  

I recieved my IV and they drew some blood.  John took care of everything, reading all of the necessary papers and then he would just have me sign.  Every little task was taking us one step closer to meeting our daughter, that precious tiny thing we had made together.
After all of my prep work was done my family was allowed to come in.  My father came in parading the most embarrassingly large pink unicorn (of which has since gained the name Feathers) and a beautiful bouquet of delicate pink roses.  I don't know if I have ever seen his face so happy.

My husband, my mother, my father, and my sister were all gathered around me.  I was surrounded by the people that I love the most and that love me the most and inside me was a new person that we would all love even more together.  I felt secure and confident.  I felt supported and protected.  The moments were passed with exchanges of. "I can't believe this moment is really here!" and "I'm so excited!" phrases.  It was all so blissful.  The nurse came in and said, "Ok mom, 15 minutes til!"  My heart lept!  We would be meeting our daughter in a matter of minutes.  I had one more thing I wanted to do...try and use the bathroom.
I rolled my IV in to the bathroom with me and sat down and had a quiet moment to myself.  I said a prayer and told Evaleigh how excited I was to meet her.  It was as if that moment froze.  It was our last moment together just the two of us while I still had her all to my self.  It was a sacred moment to me.  I told her that she was about to come in to the big world and I promised her then and there that I would do all I could to protect her and be the best mother I could.  I rubbed my belly, took one last glance at my pregnant self in the mirror, and then went back to my room to receive my epidural.  
We were going to have a baby.
It was go time.

part 2 here