utenzi

** think of this as having an Ed Wood style voice over ** At what point is the price of our bloated yuletide holidays too dear? How about when you wake up Christmas morning and find that dear old elf's feet dangling from your chimney. Apparent suicide. Tragic? That's the question we all much ask ourselves. Which one among us is totally innocent? Each year we ask for more and more stuff. And that poor old guy, an obvious cardiac case if there ever was one, must cope with hauling all that loot around the world. It's no wonder his feet are swaying in the breeze. And what's up with the dog? Is he hoping that someone will light those logs so he can have some roasted elf? From this grisly scene we should all take a lesson. Before it's too late. Take it easy at Christmas time and don't end up like that poor fellow dangling there. Despite having marvelous boots he apparently didn't have enough to live for. Maybe if he'd tried a cashmere sweater ( Glen or Glenda...

Here's an excerpt from a science item in today's news: Scientists think they have discovered the energy source of the spectacular color displays seen in the northern lights. New data from NASA's Themis mission, a quintet of satellites launched this winter, found the energy comes from a stream of charged particles from the sun flowing like a current through twisted bundles of magnetic fields connecting Earth's upper atmosphere to the sun. The energy is then abruptly released in the form of a shimmering display of lights visible in the upper latitudes of the Northern Hemisphere, said principal investigator Vassilis Angelopoulos of the University of California, Los Angeles. I think the scientists have overlooked the obvious. Santa's workshop, of course. Think about how much energy is expended there and the obvious need to entertain those hard working elves. You gotta figure television reception is lousy up there so Santa came up with those pretty lights in the sky...