Upon arriving

Well, we made it: we didn't bust up on the way to California. Nobody lost a limb or their minds from too many hours on the road. We didn't blow a tire in the Mohave desert (because we stopped in Needles, CA, reminiscent of Radiator Springs, or vice versa, for new trailer tires.) We checked in to our hotel, and Dan checked in to his job.

Sadly, he checked right out again to go to his grandmother's funeral. She was a wonderful mother of 8, grandmother of dozens, and great-grandmother of dozens more. And she sent them all birthday cards. She always made me feel like one of her own. I'm sorry we didn't all get to go to the funeral, but at least our family is represented there and our prayers have us there in spirit.

We're also still praying for a new place. I should be calling on good ole' St. Joe more vehemently.  Turns out that our stuff from Guam made it: we have messages from the shipping companies that our other car and our goods are here, too.

If only we had some place to put them.  They sure won't fit into these two Navy Lodge rooms we've been staying in the past few days, even if they are suites with kitchenettes.

But so far, no suitable home has been discovered.

We do have a back-up plan to live on base in a house that will be available at the end of the month, if we don't find something sooner. It's a bit small: 1700 sq ft, but that is twice the size of the house we were living in when our fifth child was born, so we could make it work and be grateful that we have more living space than most of the world's population.

Still, I'd like to live nearer to the Catholic school we have chosen, even though I'm having second thoughts about it and wonder if we shouldn't be taking advantage of all the programs at the bigger, free public schools.

Or if near the school isn't an option, I'd rather be nearer to the beach.

Or if near the beach isn't an option, I'd like to forego the security of a gate guard in exchange for being able to have friends and family (since we are going to have some family in the area - woohoo!) drop by at their convenience without having to get a visitor's pass.

And more than anything, I'd like to live somewhere where I didn't have to deal with traffic and drive by shopping centers all day long. I think I'm suffering from a little culture shock. I miss the peacefulness and ease of Guam. My kids were thrilled to finally go to an enormous Target today, complete with shopping garage, but I left feeling sullied in my soul for consorting with the demons of consumerism. I also left with multiple bags and walked right into REI, where I admired the variety of triathlon gear. I didn't know such fabrics existed. Nor such prices. I didn't leave with anything, except the question, "Who is it that buys all this stuff?"

I'm sure in a few months, once we're settled into our routines and unpacked and life returns to relative stasis, this sense of alienation will evaporate, and we'll begin to feel as though we belong - if not to California - at least to our life here.

One solace already evident: even though we are in an urban area, the botanical variety is amazing. The mild scent of flowering eucalyptus, I think, has enriched my morning run.  Tomorrow, I'd like to take the day off from house hunting and finally go to the beach and enjoy the immensity of the ocean, if not the frigidity. That same ocean was our consolation in Guam and will be here. Unlike Pip from Moby Dick, I hope not to be driven crazy by experiencing the vastness of God's creation, but to be driven back to sanity by the reassurance that these days of floating unmoored are but brief episodes in the long story.

In the interrim

Our Guam adventures have come to an end. We survived the trip back to the states that took over 30 hours to complete. The kids were great - behavior improved and sorrow was somewhat abated by sharing the flight with some of our favorite Guam friends who were on the same flight from Guam to LA.  

But our California adventures have not yet begun. We still are en route. We still don't have a house or an address. But we do have a car, and we have been having a wonderful time visiting family and going to a school to learn about Navy programs and traditions and how to get along with people. I also learned that my Meyers-Brigg personality is INTP or INTJ. My P/J is muddled by growing up with extreme P's and marrying a strong J. Perhaps the most beneficial part of spouse school was meeting another family who is going to the same base we are. Plus we got to eat at a lot of delicious but overpriced Newport restaurants.

Over the last three weeks, there have been a number of events and ideas that I thought were bloggable, but conversations with family and searching for a dwelling place have kept me from the computer (as has the extreme sluggishness of my parents' internet service). We've celebrated birthdays and our anniversary with the family, and have seen some old friends and lots of cousins. I've been alternately thrilled to be running down roads that open to the expanse of midwestern farmlands and a bit homesick for the ocean and warmth.  

Our time in Indiana is growing to a close, but we are in limbo about our next stop on the journey. My husband's grandmother is failing, and we are debating about heading to her bedside/funeral. He had visited her on his own a couple weeks ago, before she began to fade, so he had a chance to see her while she was well. But we have only a bit of time left, and can't wait for days, let alone weeks, for her to pass on. I've been fighting the desire to be pragmatic and guilt about it. We remain in waiting mode for a day or two more and then head west. Many prayers are being offered for this loving woman who has over 100 living descendents.

And we're praying for safe travels and a nice new place to live. Being in limbo won't last forever, but all the unknowns make the journey seem longer.  Soon enough we'll be settling in and starting a new chapter.