Life keeps happening...even on your Anniversary!

"LIFE IS TEN PERCENT WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU AND NINETY PERCENT HOW YOU RESPOND TO IT "
I have heard this saying many times in my life and I believe it is true!
Today started out fine, I got a few things done around the house, then headed off to my Physical Therapist in hopes that he could give me some relief from my back pain lately. The appointment was in Bellevue. After that appointment...I was suppose to meet a friend and then on the way home I was going to stop and get a card and stuff to make a special dinner for Jeff tonight. After all , it is our 34th wedding anniversary!!!
But as I was heading to the appointment, only blocks away from the PT's office, as I was turning on the green light, someone coming the other way ran through the red light and hit me. I kept thinking as I saw him come closer ...that he is going to stop, but then when I put on my brakes, I realized that there is no way he wasn't going to hit me and he did. After we got to the side of the road and I called 911 and the insurance, I was still shaking. My neck hurt, my knee hit the dash board and my lower back was hurting. I first thought ...what are the chances that I would get hit ...on my way to the PT for back pain in the first place? Then I thought...am I going to have neck and back pain for my whole life? From then on the thoughts were getting worse and coming faster.
After all the calls and exchanging of numbers and insurance cards...I headed back to the PT office and told him what happened, he worked on my back and neck.
It was after the appointment when I was sitting in my car for awhile (because I still felt light headed and a headache was coming on)...that I thought...I am very lucky that I was able to see my PT right after something like that happened. I was blessed that it wasn't worse. I was grateful that the man did stop, admit he ran the red light; and that he had car insurance.
So even though I have a headache and a pretty bad neck and back ache, I realized that I am blessed. It could have been way worse.
Jeff and I will have to celebrate our anniversary later, but I just came home and laid down and have been keeping ice on my neck and back.
Though I am blessed to have had 34 years with Jeff by my side. Have they all been blissful and wonderful...nope, but we have continued to work at it and he still is my best friend and the love of my life! We truly have had many wonderful years!
I just need to remember this quote again today, life is still good and we have much to be thankful for.
Good Night dear friends!
P.S. I have posted this article before, but I feel like it is worth reading again!

A LOVE LIKE THAT

I was 23, and all the way to the hospital I'd been composing what I would say to Mama before they took her to cut into her heart, whose center I supposed myself to be; hadn't she told me all my life I was the most important thing in the world to her?

Threading my way through the hospital corridors, I practiced my opening line, which  had to strike just the right note. Who but I could give her strength and confidence she would need? Whose face but mine would she want to be the last one she saw before they cut her open and died probably? Whose kiss but mine...?

I turned a corner and there was my mother lying on a stretcher in the hall, waiting for them to come for her. My father was standing over her. Something about the two of them made me stop and then, as I watched, made me keep my distance, as if there were a wall between us, and around them.

It was clear to me at that moment that for them, nothing existed outside them, nothing; there was only the man, the woman. She didn't see me, nor from the looks of it care much whether she did. They weren't talking. He was holding her hand. She was smiling into his eyes; and they were, I swear, speaking a language that at 23 I hadn't begun to understand, much less speak myself. But I could see them do it, literally see them, and I moved closer to see more, stunned, fascinated, very jealous that I had fallen in love with someone, married him, divorced him and never once come close to what I was looking at in that hall.

Next time, I said, I will know better. I will love like that.   ~ Linda Ellerbee

This is soooo important to remember!

For many years now I have said that I wish that we could sew clothes out of Wipe Off materials. That way we could see what everyone has been going through that week, that day...even that moment. Then if we know what they had been through, then maybe we would give them a little slack or at least have a little more compassion and understanding. Because I believe that everyone has a story, everyone is going through something..sometime in their life they will have to fight a battle!
But watch this short video...that is exactly the purpose of my Wipe Off Board outfits! Hope you take a minute to look at it...
you can watch it here:

The down side of these clothes would be ...you might not want to have everyone know your problems are...but the solution would be...don't wear it  until you need to!
But most people could use help, love and compassion sometime in their life, it just makes life better to have someone who can be on your side and be there with you. Life is hard and no one should have to do it alone.

I found my peeps, and I don't mean the candy ones!

Today I went swimming all alone. My swimming buddy was busy, so I had to just MAKE myself go back to the pool this morning. After dropping off my car to be fixed... after being hit in a parking lot while I was shopping. And no, they didn't admit that or leave us a number or insurance information...so we had to pay the deductable ourselves in order to get it fixed. :( Oh how I wish I would have been hit by someone HONEST!
Anyway I finally did get to the pool and even though I wasn't looking forward to being by myself but I was pleasantly surprised to meet some incredible ladies. They were doing their own exercises, but after we got out we were able to talk in the shower room. I found my peeps! Women who have lived a lot of life and have such an amazing attitude about LIFE!
Remember last week, I was worried about going swimming again and feeling bad about my body and having had a Mastectomy and all?
 The first lady that I met was a 4 time Cancer survior, she was 78 years old  and she was such a happy and grateful lady and she was swimming without any prosthetics... so she made me feel silly for worrying about just one prosthetic! Then another lady I met told me all about her exercise routine and then she shared with me all that she has been through. Knee replacements, shoulder surgery, 2 new hips and she contintues to keep coming back to swimming because in her words " You just have to keep going". The 3rd lady I met was 91 years old and she totally didn't look like it. She said that she was grateful to be able to come swimming 3 times a week, and was proud that she still could stay in her own home, take care of it by herself and also her yard. As I listened at all the stuff she does... I realized that she does way more than I ever do! She was happy and told me all about her family, children and grandchildren. She laughed and smiled alot!
So I guess this quote that my Grandmother always said to me "If everyone's problems were hung out on a line, you'd take yours and I'd take mine"... is so true! After listening to these amazing ladies, I realized that I have much to be grateful for!
I was able to do 18 laps today, ( don't get too excited ) I did some in Aqua jogging, kick board and crawl strokes...but it was a 1/2 mile. Still it felt good and I am glad I am finally back in the water.
Good night dear friends!

Kindness of Strangers

What an amazing story!
Hope you take the time to read it!
Good Night dear friends!

Deborah Greene of Superior, Colorado, published a deeply emotional open letter on The Mighty on March 8. In the week since, “To the Strangers in Whole Foods Who Surrounded Me After News of My Father’s Suicide” went viral and touched millions around the world.

Including me.

Moved by her candor, gift for writing and the topic itself, I reached out to Greene for the rest of the story. Our lengthy interview pulled back the curtain on a remarkable woman who feels both pain and a passion to prevent another heartbreaking moment like hers.

As Greene writes in her poignant letter, she was shopping nearly a year ago in Whole Foods when her phone rang. With just a few words, Greene’s life changed forever. Her father, Lowell Herman, had committed suicide. Consumed by shock and sobs, Greene collapsed to the floor and was cared for by strangers. Her beautiful letter is a heartfelt thank you to those angels and the opening, she prays, of a national conversation.

Greene described the challenging 10 months since her father’s death and her decision to go public with both her grief and her thanks. She would have penned the letter earlier, if not for the barriers of guilt and trauma so often associated with suicide loss.

“It took time for the walls to come down and for me to understand my thoughts and feelings about that morning,” Greene said. “I struggled with a lot of anger and it was hard to access some of the feelings I wanted to convey. I have done a lot of work since then in support groups and therapy.”

Greene added that writing became a way of grieving out loud. The more she wrote, the more she healed. The more she healed, the more she recognized she wasn’t alone.

“We have got to talk more about suicide,” Greene told me with a dash of force. “Grief is grief, no matter why we’re living it, but suicide is uniquely complicated. And more than any topic, it silences a room. I’ve been very blessed by friends and my beloved family who’ve helped me through this, but it’s been hard. Suicide is just different. People don’t always know what to say. And so sometimes, they say nothing.”

Like most suicides, Greene’s father’s came as a gut-punch surprise. Although the family knew he had battled depression and anxiety, he’d been getting help and, as far as they knew, had never been suicidal. Looking back now, with all they have since learned about the signs that someone might be in crisis, they wish they’d asked the most important question: “Are you thinking of hurting yourself?”

Greene, married to a rabbi and with her own long history in Judaism, admits to a complicated relationship to God since her father’s death.

“The casualty of loss makes faith difficult. It’s not a question of do I believe — I believe strongly in my faith — but I’m trying to learn how to talk God again,” she said. “I was so angry. I remember the first time I went back to synagogue I just sobbed. My husband told me I didn’t need to come if it was painful, but I told him I wanted to let God know that I’m still in it.”

With the explosive popularity of her letter, Greene is more than just in it, she’s all over it.

“I had no idea this would happen, this response is amazing,” she said. “I want to move forward into advocacy and make meaning of my father’s death.”

As the months crawl by, Greene reflects on her parents’ nearly 50-year marriage and the beautiful family they built together.

“Yet the love that surrounded him was not enough to combat the relentless voices of depression and anxiety that took hold and metastasized into his soul and spirit. It’s heartbreaking,” she said.

While Greene confides that she still feels lost, she’s less angry now. And that softening has helped her recognize that God has not left her alone.

“He will patiently wait for me to find my way back,” she said.

More than anything, Greene believes she cannot allow her father’s suicide to be for nothing.

“It cannot be senseless. I’ve learned so much about what we all might have done to save him, it’s time to raise my voice to prevent another family from suffering this kind of horrible loss,” she said. “I want to write and talk about suicide loss and grief to open eyes.”

If the success of her opening to this conversation is any indication, the world is ready to read, listen and see.

(To learn more or contact Deborah Greene, see reflectingoutloud.net. If you or someone you know needs help, please call 1-800-273-TALK or visit the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline today atsuicidepreventionlifeline.org.)

I found the article HERE

A bit better today!

Well, I still just don't feel very good but... I am a bit better than yesterday so...I am trying to keep everything in perspective. Always amazed at how TIME slows down when you are in such terrible pain. I thought Sunday and Sunday Night would last forever! Then the 2 hours in the ER waiting room with hurting so bad with Kidney Stones, I thought I would never get help! I'm not a screamer or yeller but oh I absolutely couldn't sit still the pain in my back and the nausea was soooo bad. Once they finally got the pain medicine the right dosage then I started getting some relief!

 My family always teases me that every where I go...I make new friends! I had to laugh today because after I finally drug myself to the store, as I was checking out I was talking to the cashier and the man who was bagging my groceries. They all know me there and they knew that I hadn't been in for a few days ( that's how often I go ). As I told them that I had been sick with Kidney Stones, we then talked about everyone they knew who had had kidney stones. As I left they told me that they hoped I felt better. When I got to the car the cashier came running out with a bouquet of flowers and said " we sure hope you start feeling good and come back soon!" 

Yes, life is hard but it makes it sooooo much better when you have wonderful friends!

What a great weekend!

Well, my laptop is broke and I find myself behind on my blog, because Jeff and I both are sharing the computer. So tonight I will play catch up a bit.
I hope someday when my children and grandchildren look back at this blog that they will feel ....loved, appreciated, happy, inspired and grateful. Because that is what I am totally trying to do with writing it. It is about life, it is about the lessons we all learn in life. It is about love, friendship, family and faith.
I feel like in my life, I have been blessed by so many of you! I have been blessed to have an incredible family and now to have grandchildren...is quite the BONUS! I love the fresh look they give to my life. It truly makes me want to slow down more, listen more, play more and love more. And that's what we did this weekend, when we had Jenny for her 2 Day Sleep Over!

Jenny is quite a funny personality. She laughs a lot and even in the morning, after coming into my bed and talking about ... everything, she still keeps me laughing.

She had a huge imagination and loves pretending with her stuffed animals. Here are her puppies going to the book store she said! I love waking up to this smile!

After she helped Poppa in the garage ( while he was working on his motorcycle ), we had dinner and then went to Menchies ...for Frozen Yogurt, it's a tradition when the girls come over!

It is her favorite place she said!

She and Poppa were laughing at each other, because each of them got a Brain Freeze!
This girl doesn't leave her Poppa's side for very long! She keeps him laughing too!

Then because it was Saturday night, we went to the store to pick up a few things before the Sabbath, and look what we found outside of Trader Joes...more fun photo props!

"As soon as I saw you, I knew a Grand Adventure was about to happen" ~ Winnie the Pooh

Oh Jenny, we love you so much! Thanks for bringing such a fun, innocent and fresh outlook on life to Nana and Poppa this weekend. Can't wait till next time!

Still learning at my age!

The other night Jeff and I watched a special on BYU TV about Joan of Arc!
What an amazing story, some times I wish I hadn't miss so many of the stories of History in school. But I did, most of my time in school was just trying to survive, it was just too hard for me to concentrate.
As I listen and watch Historical specials on TV, I realize that there were a lot of amazing people that I missed in my childhood.
So glad that at least I am learning so much now!!!!
Guess you are never too old to learn!
Would love to have the chance in the next life to meet this Joan of Arc, what a brave, obedient and amazing young women.

You can watch it HERE:

"There are some things worse than death. There are some things worse than dying young. These are, to live without courage and conviction."

Joan of Arc’s incredible story starts with her humble beginnings as a farm girl. Within a few short years, she would become an inspiring military leader. In a time when France was in disarray and women did not fight, Joan followed the voices of angels and dedicated herself to her mission. Joan's strong commitment to her faith seamlessly translated into loyalty for her cause - something her country needed, but others feared.

Grateful!

I have had a GRATEFUL day and don't want to skip over that without acknowledging how blessed I feel. As I told you that I have been down with a cold this week but... not down like I usually am. Yes, I got some chills, I had heaviness in my chest and other cold symptoms but it stayed just at that...a plain old ordinary cold, not bronchitis or pneumonia! That is a first in many years. 
About 6 months ago I felt impressed to call a lady that I knew ( but not well ), but who I knew was a strong and healthy person and one who definitely into healthy choices. She is also one of the happiest and most positive people I have ever met too. Just a wealth of knowledge and happiness all wrapped up in one.
I asked her about some healthy choices that I could look into before this Fall and Winter came, to strengthen my immune system. Since that is the flu season and personally I didn't want to go through another year of being sooooo sick. One of the things that she and her family use are doTerra Oils , I didn't know alot about them but was very curious so I went HERE: to learn more about them.
But since she sells them, it was great personally to get her knowledge and advice for what me and my body needed.  I have had other women help me with them, but I guess it just wasn't the right time, but I appreciate what they taught me. But 6 months ago I knew that I needed to get back into really paying attention to my body, and so I  started using the oils. I really do love them! My family and close friends are amazed at the results. I even took on 2 more jobs this fall and still stayed healthy through it all.
Now I am still a work in progress, but I was just tremendously grateful that this stayed at JUST A COLD!
I also went to a new Doctor today about my back. I will let you know more about that as I go along but it did remind me today that I need to stop and listen to my body more often, I need to do more positive affirmations,and I need to be more Grateful for the amazing life, family, friends and connections that I have!

Plus, my dear friend actually took me today to that new Doctor appointment, fun to be with her and not to have to do that alone. She is a PT herself, and so together we were able to share information that the DR wanted to know about me, my body and my life. So grateful that she went with me and we got to spend some time together!

After the DR appointment I was able to make a connection with a lady by phone that I found online through a you tube... she was so amazing that I emailed to thank her for her talent and for sharing it so freely with others. She is an artist, a scrapbooker, a stamper... and what a treat it was to just come upon her blog! You can check her blog out for yourself if you are into any kind of paper crafting ...look her up HERE: watch one of her you tubes and you will be amazed and her sweet personality comes through on her you tubes. I know... I should take some personal classes from her! :)

Then the dear friend who I mentioned earlier, came over tonight to help me with something I was having trouble with. I am alway amazed at how selfless she is, she has a young family, she is very busy and she is also a Massage Therapist and a great one at that ... see for yourself HERE:
but she just came and took time out of her busy life to help me...her friend.

I just feel so grateful to these people who are in my life now, helping me, or setting an example for me, who are teaching me how to make my life...even better!
 I am teaching a lesson at church tomorrow so I had better get studying!

Good Night dear friends!

I must have done something good!

Yesterday our dear, fun, sweet, crazy, talented and beautiful daughter Lauren turned 25! How can that be? Wasn't she the fun, sweet, crazy, twisted and troubled toddler just a year or so ago?
Oh how I worried about that girl when she was little, she seemed to have her own mind, she definitely saw the world through different eyes and I was almost positive that Heavenly Father forgot to put that filter in her body, you know the one from your mind to your mouth! We never knew what was going to come out of her little mouth! :) Life was never boring with  her that is for sure! How we loved her and how we continue to love her!
She and her husband Nik are still in Rexburg, Idaho. She has graduated, but she is now working there and helping put him through the rest of his schooling. All 4 of our kids went to BYU Idaho, and every time I would go visit them, I wondered how in the world they handled that cold weather? But they not only survived, they seemed to have fun at the same time!


 Our other dear, fun, sweet, talented and beautiful daughter Amy ...made this for Lauren's birthday! She is one talented girl too! And you should meet my daughter in law Krystal... the talent all these girls have is just crazy and wonderful! I feel blessed to just be around all of them!

Like the song from the movie Sound of Music... " somewhere in my youth or childhood ...I must have done something good" to deserve such wonderful kids!

 and Grandkids!

Lauren has been drawing since she was a kid, always creating something. Then she started taking classes in school for Photography and fell in love with that. Her first Photography Business was called THROUGH LAUREN'S EYES! She showed us a world that was even more beautiful when we got to see it again through her eyes!




She did this photo shoot of Angie and Jenny as the Princess and the Pea, she has always loved Fairy Tales!


She loves Christmas and Winter!

She loves the outdoors and camping!
She loves wearing T shirts, especially the ones her brother Brad designs! She actually used to draw and sell her own T shirts when she was young... but that is for another post! :)

She loves all animals, always has!

Even stuffed animals! Every Christmas she would write in her letter to Santa " Please bring me an animal ( a breathing one )!"

 She loves her cousins, her brothers and sister!

And of course her Dad!

She loves to draw and just took up Watercolors...they are amazing!

She likes to sew...

 She especially likes to design and sew costumes for her photo shoots!

She likes to cook and she LOVES PUMPKIN PIE!!!

She likes being a Seattle Native!

She loves married life with her Best Friend!

She loves everything about History and wants to see the world!

And I bet the way your life is going sweet Lauren, that you will! And we will all get to see it too through your eyes and your art work!
Can hardly wait for your next 25 year adventures to begin!
We love you forever Lauren Brooke!