Let Me Get This Straight...

There really *IS* a show called "Dancing With The Stars"??? And it really *does* feature third- and fourth- rate has-been "actors" who are dancing with contestants?

Huh.

All this time I thought it was an elaborate joke, a throwaway pretend show that clever people like our Mistress of Snark would use as an example of all that is wrong with modern society. I figured that the premise was too far-fetched to be real; that it was too over-the-top stupid to be an actual, honest-to-goodness program on the teevee.

Apparently, I misinterpreted the depths to which popular culture can sink.

Now look. I understand dreck. I came of age in the 1980s, when there were such television shows as "ALF", "The A-Team", and "BJ and the Bear" on. This was not quality programming by anyone's measure - this was "give the masses something stupid to laugh at so they can forget about their humdrum lives for 30 minutes". But everyone knew it. We weren't looking for deep meaning, we were looking for something to take our minds off the ZOMG IMPENDING NUCLEAR DEATH.

I mean, it's one thing to pitch a show about a fuzzy alien who comes to Earth wanting to eat cats and live with Joe Lieberman. That takes guts. But to say "hey, let's take a bunch of has-beens and have them dance with game show contestants"??? Really? What was next on the list, "Grocery shopping with the stars", where B- and C- movie starlets would help contestants pick the right brand of hair color at WalMart?

I confess; I don't watch television. I think sometime in the mid-1990s, after Conan O'Brien stopped writing for The Simpsons and the show devolved into nothing more than "How stupid can we make Homer", I lost interest. Every once in a while I'll catch what passes for television either at my parents' house or when the Mrs. is watching TV, and it reinforces that I am not missing a damn thing.

Someone get Obama a violin to play...

That is all.