This is a war story.
My group was on the second level of a classic module. They
had been slogging through it for some time and had just gotten out of a major
trap and were pretty beat up. Half of the party wanted to go back to camp, and
the other half wanted to stay and clear more rooms. This turned into a longer-than-normal
table discussion.
One of my players (we’ll call him Cain) was built for action, not talk. He
routinely zoned out if a discussion ran longer than a few minutes. Cain was a
druid, but he was about as druidic as a goblin assassin, which he probably
would have enjoyed playing. He was in the
“go back to camp” group. The other player (“Abel”) was a big, thick fighter and
he wanted to clear more rooms. The four players were gridlocked at two and two.
While the rest of the group was yelling, Cain said to me, as
quietly as he could, “I’ve got rope, right? Fifty feet?” We checked his
character sheet and sure enough he had 50 feet of fine adventuring rope.
The party was on the second level, about 100’ high into the
mountain tower. Their exit was an opening with a ledge on it and a straight
drop down, or a careful spelunking with a Dex check at the end.
I naturally assumed that Cain was going to just start
setting up the rope for everyone to descend. One of the party had a ring of
feather fall, so he was fine. The others would have to solve this relatively minor
logistical challenge.
As it was, I was trying to referee the discussion when Cain
said to me, “I want to tie the rope around Abel’s leg.”
That got Abel’s attention. “What?”
Cain refused to look at him. There was a prank in progress.
It was how they operated, this group. “Okay,” I said, “you need to make a
Stealth roll, and you, Abel, get to make a perception check.”
They rolled. Cain rolled a 19. Abel rolled a 3.
That rope was now tied around Abel’s boot. “What now?”
Cain looked right at Abel and smiled. “I grab the other end
and run for the opening and jump out.”
Abel said what we were all thinking. “Why?”
“I’m sick of talking about it. We’re leaving!” Cain looked
at me and said, “I jump and take him with me.”
Howls erupted from the table. These guys were always doing
stupid shit like this, but this was the first time that hit points were going
to be lost. “Okay, fine, but we’re doing this in slow motion. First off, make a
Strength save to yank this giant guy off of his feet.”
Cain rolled. “Sixteen!”
Dammit.
“Okay, Abel, you have been yanked off of your feet and you are sliding as fast
as Cain is falling toward the opening and the ledge.”
“Can I grab the ledge?”
“You can try,” I said. “Make a Dex save.”
The d20 rattled into the tray. “2.”
“Okay, you can SEE the ledge as it zooms away from you, and
now you are falling.”
The other players are now starting to laugh, mostly because they aren’t the
ones about to take a bunch of falling damage.
Cain was not to be denied. “Can I pull Abel down faster?”
Abel said, “I throw my arms out, trying to grab anything I
can.”
Sure, why not? “There’s a tree limb sticking out of the side
of the rocks. Make a dex save.”
Dice rolled. “18!”
“Okay, you’ve got the limb, and you’re hanging on for dear
life.” I turned to Cain and smiled. “Make a Strength save to keep hold of the
rope, because you’ve just jerked to a stop about halfway down the cliff.”
Cain rolled. “15?”
“Yeah, you can keep hold. So, now…”
Cain interrupted. “I want to brace my legs and pull Abel off
the limb.”
“Really?”
“Yes, really!”
“Okay, so, make a strength check. Abel, you, too.”
You can guess how it went down.
“Abel, you are falling straight down again,” I said.
“Am I closer to Cain now?”
“Yes, you are.”
“Can I catch up to him in the fall?”
“We’re in slow motion. Sure, why not? Make a Dex save.”
“Natural 20!”
Who am I to argue? “Okay, he’s within your grasp.”
“Wait, can I get out of…”
“No, you can’t. Abel, what do you want to do?”
“Are we close to the ground?”
“Oh, yes.”
“I want to position myself so that I’m on top of Cain.”
“And I want to be on top of Abel.”
Of course you do. “Strength
versus Strength. Go!”
Abel lost. Abel hit the ground first, and took enough damage
to knock him out. Cain made a saving throw and took half damage from the
relatively soft landing. The character with the feather fall ring floated down
and threw the ring up to the last member of the group. Abel was healed, and
Cain got punched, but they were all too busy laughing and telling me what an
epic encounter that was.
It was like running a game for the Marx Brothers, but they
loved it. And that effectively ended the session for the day. Oh, we did a
little more, but we all knew nothing was going to come close to matching the intensity
of the Tandem Slo-Mo Rope Fall.
