Wednesday March 30, 2011 Feeling Springy

Today's Good Things:
A bit of extra sleep this morning
On track with lessons and chores
I did great with food choices/calories today
Gorgeous weather got me out for my afternoon mile AND another family mile after dinner :-)
Enjoyed using my new washer..yay!
Watched a movie all to myself. That was lovely.

Today's Not So Good Things:
My sweet boy's pet gerbil was found "expired" this morning. Funeral was held after lunch. ;-)
Afternoon snack was too carb-y
Missed my Morning 15
Staying up too late to get this in!

It was simply a lovely day.  (well, not counting the sad details of the burial ;-) ) The weather had that hint of warmth to it. The sun was shining down and in and filling up my mind with thoughts of clean windows and walls and basements and yard. Ahhhh...I can still smell the freshness. It won't last long, as I hear tell we are to have 6-12 inches arriving by Friday. Give thanks in all things, right? Right. :-)

I'm finally finding the groove again of paying attention and caring about how I eat during the day. Two days in a row I took the time to make my own lunch rather than gobble down what was easy at the table.

I did end up feeling a little edgy by the end of the day. I think I was just getting to that spot in the week where I needed a little time to myself to regroup and relax.  I seem to need that alone time every so often to refresh my mind and remotivate my brain.

Tomorrow is Thursday which is our wrap up day for the week. I'm so grateful! I admit, I am the one who is counting down the days until spring break. I am the one who is longing for the freedom of no books, tests, and assignements. I am the one who is wishing it all away instead of enjoying and embracing the moment as I should. Serves me right to have winter blast me yet again. I will be grateful and I will rejoice in the challenges of our days. I wonder how the family would feel about turning this next snow into a Farewell To Winter Party? That sure would turn the frowns around! :-)

Tuesday March 29, 2011 Date Night

Today's Good Things:
Fair day with lessonwork
Fair day on calories (minus the choc. chips...grrr.)
Afternoon and evening walk today - 2.5 miles total
Amazing Date Night

Today's Not So Good Things:
Those blasted choc. chips
Over on my eat to lose goal of 1500 cal
Missed my morning 15
Up with sick baby for a couple hours during the night - yawn

Today was a good day in my thinking. I was thoughtful about my food choices. I passed on the high carb lunch and was able to pull together a nice salad with some leftover lentils. That was a good save since I mindlessly nibbled on too many chocolate chips that are meant for rewards for the *children*...ahem.

What topped off my day, however, was the wonderful way my children blessed me tonite. Tuesday night is our regular "date night". Typically we order pizza for an easy dinner and clean up and send the children to bed early to read while my husband and I enjoy some time alone. Well, today my oldest daughter got the idea to have a "restaurant dinner" at home for the two of us. She and her sibs worked all day to decorate and set up a Table for Two in our mudroom/pantry. We were sent off to dress up fancy for our romantic dinner. What a precious night! Both my husband and I were giddy with excitement and bursting with joy to see our children desire such a blessing for us. It's been a tough couple of weeks and this was an unexpected and much cherished gift.

So, I enjoyed the extra calories. Each one helped to create a memory I will treasure forever. :-)

Don't Call Me Sugar! Part 1 - Intro

Our family has been making changes over the years to move to a whole foods diet. As we learned the benefits of eating whole grains and unprocessed foods, we thought we were doing pretty well. However, a serious health issue brought us to our knees and searching for more details on how the foods choices were were making may be harming us.

Our oldest daughter has been diagnosed with childhood epilepsy. That is scary in and of itself, but due to her condition and a week of returning night seizures several years ago, we took the advice of some experienced friends and decided to work hard at eliminating all sugar from our diet as much as we possibly could.

After reading a book, Get the Sugar Out by Anne Louise Gittleman, it was all I could do to keep myself from thinking that every food held poison that would destroy us!! Once I got over the initial extremism that comes when I learn new things, I was able to begin making wise and better choices for our family.

Sugar is an addictive food, that is certain. Sugar is harmful, there is no argument. Sugar is also confusing and difficult to track since it can be hidden, transformed, and deceptively labeled. In a culture such as ours, it is vital that we understand the effects this substance has on our bodies, emotions, and habits.  Sugar is not evil, in and of itself, just as money is not evil, in and of itself. However, just as we are warned that money is not to be our master, we would be wise to have the same awareness and cautions with the beloved sweeteners that make this world go 'round.

I know that our society has overwhelmed us with sugar and sugar products to an insane excess, but I'm confident that our flesh has battled this indulgence from early times. The Lord created sweetness for us to enjoy, "My son, eat honey, for it is good, Yes, the honey from the comb is sweet to your taste" Prov. 24:13.  He even uses our delight of His natural creation to draw us closer to His own commands, "How sweet are Your words to my taste ! Yes, sweeter than honey to my mouth!" Psalm 119:103.  As is our (sinful) nature, we have found a way to distort the good gifts the Lord has given us to indulge our flesh.  So much so that the Lord has to caution us as he gives us his gifts, "Have you found honey ? Eat only what you need, That you not have it in excess and vomit it. " Prov. 25:16; "It is not good to eat much honey, Nor is it glory to search out one's own glory." Prov. 25:27

In this series of journal entries, I plan to share the resources that I've learned from as I've been making changes for myself and my family. I will post some neat lists and videos that bring to life the reality of how our bodies are affected by our daily choices.  I'll share the simple and not-so-simple ways I've been working to eliminate sugar from our diet and our desires. I hope to record the great ways our health has improved due to the nutritional changes we are making.

I'd like to devote a great amount of time to this, but in all practicality, I'm not able to put this in the Top Ten of Things I Must Do In A Day.  So, bear with me as I work to record my own journey and encourage any others who may be following along.

Until then, here is a fantastic video from a new blog that I've just started reading. It's a far better series on sugar than I could ever hope to produce. Give it a read and feel free to leave some comments here for discussion as you do. I haven't read it thoroughly, so I'm linking to it for source purposes right now. Though, it does look promising as far as helpful information goes. :)

Overheard today...

"If Jesus can make it 40 days in the wilderness, I can make through the Dunkin Donuts drive-thru."

I resisted the Boston Kreme! Yay Me!!  Oh, correction...Yay God!! :D

Saturday March 26, 2011 Reap What You Sow

Today's Good Things:
Decent day calorie-wise
Active day with household tasks and errands
Fun time out shopping with my oldest
Good choice on a take-home dinner (Sam's rotisserie chicken served with a quick-fixed salad and sourdough bread)

Today's Not So Good Things:
Empty calories sharing a soda at lunch and on the way home from shopping. I HATE drinking calories. :-/
High sodium day

I'm bummed with the scale. Not surprised, just bummed. I am reaping what I have sown for the last two weeks. Neglect.

When I don't do this ON PURPOSE, it doesn't get done. I'm not sure when or if I'll ever get to the point where I just naturally eat to lose or maintain, but I am praying it happens someday. Until then, I need to get back to work and work HARD.  I'm still trying to find a way to make this season of losing the weight a priority when so many other things need to be priority, too. There is a way. I know there is, I just need to keep praying and working to find it.

I can do *all* things that He has called me to do through Him who strengthens me. (my paraphrase of Phil. 4:13)

Thursday March 24, 2011 Super Fun!

Today's Good Things:
Field Trip!!!!
Made some good choices for our packed lunch
Burned 233 calories with my evening Step Aerobics workout
Got in my sit-ups and push-ups (a little late, but it counts!)
Shopping for a new washer/dryer :D

Today's Not So Good Things:
Made some poor choices for our packed lunch
Munchies on the way home
Still not caught up on laundry

We had a Super Fun day today! It was like My Birthday Part 2 - The Good Version. :-D  Dh woke me with an offer to take us out for some fun. We decided to go on a field trip I've been planning for a while to a history museum/science center. We had such a great time. Perfect, perfect, perfect day. :-)

I came home and got the kids settled into bed. Read from the Five Little Peppers and then got in a 30 min. step work out on the Wii.  It felt so good! I haven't done it in so long, I actually made myself believe I didn't like it anymore, but that is SO not true! I love the step aerobics and I can't wait to start up again in the evenings. Dh's schedule is so crazy right now, so I hope I can find a way to make it happen.

Tomorrow is Friday. We'll have to catch up for the work we didn't get done today, but no biggie. No one can be grumpy on a Friday. ;-)

Where Am I?

Good question. Wish I had a great answer. ;-)

The last week and half I've not been journaling. I've not been logging consistently either. Some days I've been too busy to find the time to write. Some days I've been too busy to log food and exercise. Most of the time, however, I've been derailed by one thing or another. Company for dinner, a holiday party, the weekend, my birthday.  Sort of a snowball of this and that which led to a stand still in this part of my life.

I was working to make some good choices. I also allowed indulgences. I have started up with my morning 15s again this week, and was surprised that I was able to start where I left off with reps. The weather has been a real downer and I've used it as an excuse to stay in where it's warm instead of conquering the snow for my afternoon walks.

I'm a little bummed that I didn't meet some of my goals that I had for my birthday. However, I was learning from my son this morning as he shared about his devotions. The Lord tells us he desires our obedience rather than our sacrifices. It struck me a little that the goals I've been making, the routines and the lists, they are like sacrifices in a way.  Like the Israelites of old would rely on the practice of offering sacrifices to excuse sin, I saw that how easy it is to use my fitness tricks or games to excuse some of my indiscretions with my choices. The Lord desires my obedience above my excuses. Obedience in the area of how I use and care for my body. Obedience in the example I give my children. Obedience in the use of my time and fulfillment of my responsibilities. When I fail to obey, I need to be on my knees asking forgiveness, not trying to "make up for it" by sacrificing the next days meals or doubling up on my chores. Now, there are certainly times when I will need to do those things, but they are not what makes me right before the Lord. I cannot "undo damage" with my own efforts. "Picking myself back up", "Getting Back On Track", none of that is what the Lord is calling me to do UNLESS I have first made right my heart before him.

Lord, you call me to obedience to your command to be diligent in all things, to walk in self-control, to live peaceably with those around me, to live by the Spirit and not the desires of my flesh. I know that I have sinned and fallen short of these commands.

Daily I need your cleansing and it must come before I make attempts in my own strength to fix any messes I have made. When I come before you, humble and contrite, you will restore and renew. You will pick me up and set me on the path. I am in awe of your grace and mercy.

"If we say that we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar and His word is not in us."

1 John 1:8-10

"I waited patiently for the LORD; And He inclined to me and heard my cry. He brought me up out of the pit of destruction, out of the miry clay, And He set my feet upon a rock making my footsteps firm. He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God; Many will see and fear And will trust in the LORD. How blessed is the man who has made the LORD his trust, And has not turned to the proud, nor to those who lapse into falsehood. Many, O LORD my God, are the wonders which You have done, And Your thoughts toward us; There is none to compare with You. If I would declare and speak of them, They would be too numerous to count. Sacrifice and meal offering You have not desired; My ears You have opened; Burnt offering and sin offering You have not required. Then I said, 'Behold, I come; In the scroll of the book it is written of me. I delight to do Your will, O my God; Your Law is within my heart.'"

Psalm 40:1-8

Back where I started!

Yesterday I saw 206...really, I did!

This morning 206.6  I had a lot of sodium yesterday, so maybe that accounts for the gain, but it's still a loss and I'll take it. ;)

That puts me at 15.4 pounds gone since October. I'm back at my after-baby weight. That has never happened before! I usually meet baby's first birthday at least 20 pounds heavier than birth. I'm celebrating the Lord's work today! :D

I reset my weekly goals list, but I wanted to add a couple things to it here:
Declutter/reorganize school room
1500 daily calorie goal (baby has begun to wean, so I think I'm safe with that goal now)

It's getting warmer, so I'm going to work hard at my walking goal this week. I made note of my next milestone marker I'm aiming for at the top of the blog. If I meet that mark, I'll have met my next reward for losing another 10 pounds. I'll have another First of being UNDER my after baby weight at 1 year pp. I'll be much closer to my walking goal of 100 miles. 

And if I don't meet that milestone, I'll still celebrate and be thankful for all the Lord is doing in my life. :-)

Please pray for my heart to be in line with the Lord's and that my actions would follow!

"For since He Himself was tempted in that which He has suffered,

He is able to come to the aid of those who are tempted."

Hebrews 2:18

Active Patience

I was updating my notes from the book I'm reading. As I was doing so, I felt this topic warranted it's own post. I am struck by the truth it holds and the simple way it challenges me in this journey. Here are some quotes and my thoughts I wanted to get down.

"The testing of your faith produces endurance; and let endurance have its full effect, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking in nothing." 
James 1:3-4

"...we often think of patience and waiting as an empty time--a time of doing nothing. But waiting can be a very important, even critical, time in our development.

Patience benefits our souls as much as it ever does our bodies. Remember, the Apostle Paul charged us to 'run with perseverance the race that is set before us' (Heb 12:1). Even in the midst of running a race, patience is key. Without patience, endurance and perseverance, discouragement sets in. And with discouragement comes defeat. Patience is not a passive time. Patience is a time of growing.

I'm encouraging active patience--patience that comes with taking the first step in the direction you know you need to go--perseverance. Paul didn't say to 'sit on the sidelines with your patience.' He clearly said to join the race.

You have joined the race. Patience will help you get to the goal line because it will help you put one foot in front of the other at a steady pace instead of sprinting out fast, wearing yourself out, and not finishing the race.

'...when you do one thing right--at the right time--the next thing works even better, and you, one day, will become what you want to become.'

People who lose weight and keep it off don't need to be extreme. Patience keeps them steady."

I find amazing encouragement and a bit of chiding in these words. I admit, I want to be skinny now.  Well, truth be told, I'd be happy if it was yesterday. ;-)  I confess, I get so upset and irritated when I work so hard for great results and they don't come fast enough. It's true, I hate being told I need to "just be patient".  However, I find great empowerment in this concept of Active Patience. It is true that when I think of patience, I equate that with sitting still and doing nothing. Yet, that is so far from the truth. Patience IS perseverance. Patience is ENDURANCE. Those are ACTIVE words. Those things require me to work and to work HARD.  And, they hold hope and promise for a reward. 

Honestly, I have such a great mountain to climb, I need all the Active Patience the Lord will grant. Yet, I can already see that the testing of my faith in this area is certainly creating an endurance I've never known. I can't remember the last time I have had to work so hard for so long, inching my way to my goal. This endurance that I am learning will one day have it's full effect. One day I will be mature and complete, lacking in nothing, and it will be because of the Active Patience the Lord created in me during this time. Therefore, I will not wish away this challenge. I will not envy those who are progressing faster than I am or have already met their goals. I will rejoice that the Lord has chosen yet another area in my life to refine and change so that I may develop the maturity and become complete in Him.

How truly grateful I am for the Lord's continued work in my life. He never stops transforming my life.

I Just Realized...

Today I was going over some notes in my pregnancy journal from last year.  I am already 4 pounds UNDER my pre-pregnancy weight! And, I have 1 pound to go before I reach my after-baby weight!!

See, I gained a total of 5 pounds in my last pregnancy. After delivery, when all was settled, I ended up 5 pounds under my pre-pregnancy weight. That was amazing. But, here's the really great part of that story...

A few months before I got pregnant, I had started working to lose weight, just as I'm doing now. (minus the blog ;) ) As I worked, I prayed the Lord would give me a longer break between babies so that I could work to lose the weight I believed was necessary to lose to have a safe and healthy pregnancy. I had been borderline GD for the last few babies and I knew I needed to make big changes.  I believed I had a great reason to ask for a break. After all, the Lord would want me skinny to have more babies, right?

Well, just 2-3 months into my efforts, I ended up pregnant. And that was with some efforts on my part to even avoid a pregnancy! (charting with only one cycle isn't real helpful ;-) )  I was confused. I was frustrated. I was annoyed. I was scared. And, I was even a little embarrassed that I hadn't lost more weight before getting pregnant again.

Guess what? I had a tough pregnancy. I was very tired, sick, sore, and never really got any kind of "second wind" that I normally would with our other babies. Guess what else? I ended up diagnosed with GD in the last month. Because of that, I lost the homebirth I had planned and ended up with a not-as-bad-as-it-could-have-been-but-still-miserable-in-my-book hospital birth. My poor choices over the years had done just what I feared they would do. Prevented me from the *best* I had hoped for.

However, my prayers were not unheard. I may not have gotten the break I wanted to lose the weight, but I *did* lose weight! In nine months I grew a 8.9 pound, healthy baby girl and LOST 5 pounds!! Pretty funny how the Lord works. Because of the GD, I also gained some new insights into my eating habits, I learned a bit more about nutrition, I learned even more about the medical community ::sigh::, and I learned a GREAT DEAL about trusting the Lord in a mighty way.

So, I'm excited that I'm back where I started a little less than  a year ago. I'm praying that I'll see ONE-derland before Baby's first birthday. THAT would take another miracle, but I know and love Someone who is very good at those. :D

Wednesday March 9, 2011 Finished Well

Today's Good Things:
Great eating day, right at 1500 cals
Good day working with the children
Dealt well with my stress/frustrations
Got in 1.5miles with ds this afternoon
2 more spreadsheets done for school planning

Today's Not So Good Things:
Minor emotional meltdown this morning - really blasted dh :(

I was very pleased with my eating today. Even kept my carbs under the 200 mark, which is what I've given myself as my "top" goal for now. That was with the ice cream bar treat that dh and I enjoyed together for dessert.  I was thrilled to get in 1.5 miles this afternoon, especially since I spent the rest of the day schooling and planning at the kitchen table.

Emotionally, I really lost it this morning. I'm having a rough time with some things and the flood gates erupted today. I feel horrible for allowing it to happen, but I honestly feel much better. Sigh. Poor dh, I know *he* isn't feeling better. :(

So, I need to add Prayer and Journaling to my list of things that I am trying to reprioritize in my day. It shows that I'm off balance there, for sure.

Tuesday March 8, 2011 Crazy Week

Today's Good Things:
Decent school day
Kept up with meals well
Got out for a 1.5 mile walk with dh this afternoon (gorgeous sunshining day!)

Today's Not So Good Things:
2nd day of apple pie
not getting in enough exercise
late start
2nd night dh working late

It's been a tough couple of days and the rest of the week promises to be a bit stressful. Dh was able to get a small job, but it's working after hours, so I've been solo the last couple of nights. He's so busy during the day bidding jobs or studying for the exam that, well, it's been a little harried around here.

I've been trying to figure out what happened over the last few weeks. I was getting in a workout almost every evening and doing really well with my 15's. Now, I just can't seem to find the time again. I hate when it feels like life is overwhelming.  As if everything is about to topple over.  That is so not true, but somehow I go through these times when I feel like I just can't get a grip.

Tonite I worked on some curriculum planning. I got some laundry put away and worked on getting children to bed. It was good to get a few things done and it was enough for this tired momma. However, I really need to get back to my daily activities that are building strength in my body. I liked that I was feeling stronger and had more energy. I liked that I *wanted* to move and be active. I don't like feeling lazy and slumpish. And, not getting in the exercise makes the stress feel harder to work through. I know that having dh work nights makes it near impossible for me to get in a good workout, but tonite is the last night so I can start fresh in the morning.

I hope to get up early enough for a good walk and a strong start to the day. I *will* get back to my morning strength exercises because I know how good I will feel mentally, physically, and emotionally for doing them. I'm not really "off-track", because I'm still working hard to make good choices with my eating. But, I need to refocus on my activity level and reprioritize that again.

Afraid to Weigh-In

I avoided the scale all weekend. It was a horrible-no-good-bad-eating-no-exercise-on-the-run-don't-think-about-what-you-are-shoving-in-your-face, weekend.

And I'm down 1.2 pounds. !!!!!!!!
Shocked?
Absolutely.

Dehydrated?
Probably

Happy?
You Better Believe It!!

Okay, no time to post more. Off to go read my bible and then get my act together for a Recovery Week.

Wow.

My Afternoon 15

I grabbed the camera the other day to get some photos of the pretty snow while on my walk. This is my usual route to get in my 15 minute mile.

 I was out a little late that day, so the lighting isn't so great. It was also hard to get a shot of all the amazing views. Horses standing tall and regal with their winter blankets. Distant mountain peaks. Idyllic new england farm houses surrounded by gardens, pastures, field and forest. Where we live is beautiful in all directions, so sometime I'll get some more pics to post of my other lovely views.

Truly, being out in the beauty that God has made is so invigorating. I can't help but praise Him for all that surrounds me as well as the opportunity to be out there enjoying it. This is definitely the kind of exercise I have come to love and look forward to. I'm so thankful He's given it to me!

Wednesday March 2, 2011 Quiet Day

Today's Good Things:
Restful day
Completed a couple small projects
Tried a new soup, good and healthy
skipped the pasta bake again

Today's Not So Good Things:
No exercise
Fought a headache all day
T.i.r.e.d.
Over on calories

Today my oldest was feeling sick. We took it easy, as I've been fighting a headache myself, though I'm pretty sure that's due to lack of sleep more than illness.

I felt so hungry today. Possibly b/c I've been under on calories the last couple of days.  But I was genuinely hungry, not just eating out of habit. So, I'm over by a couple hundred calories today, but I think I needed them. I just wish I hadn't gone so Carb Heavy today to do it.

Dh worked late tonite, but is home safe and sound out of the snow and ice. We've had some crazy weather and while I enjoyed some gorgeous sunshine pouring in the afternoon, the ground is covered in white yet again tonite.

I am so ready for spring.

Tuesday March 1, 2011 Great Day!

Today's Good Things:
Family prayer time
Short morning walk due to too much ice on the road, but still great getting out!
Great eating
Great school day
Afternoon walk with dh and ds
Date night OUT, children at Papa and Grandma's
Mall walking - 2miles (at least)
Great conversation time with dh

Today's Not So Good Things:
Indulged in a Boston Kreme my sweetie bought for me
I'm staying up too late again

Such a lovely day today. I loved getting outside to walk and soak up the cool, crisp air and sunshine. The ice was a little scary, but worth it. I was so good and skipped the pasta bake I served the fam for lunch and heaped up a big ol' plate of greens instead, topped with black beans, corn and salsa. Grapes for sweet. Great lunch! Peanuts for snack time and I was on a roll!

Dh offered to take me out for date night, so we headed to Applebee's for their under 550 menu. My meal, with sides, was only 390 calories! Woohoo! Then we headed to the mall for some speed walking. We were told it's a 1/2 mile per lap, but it sure feels like a lot more than what we walk for our mile at home. I can't find it listed online, so I'm going to call tomorrow to see. My curiosity is driving me crazy wanting to know how many miles I really got in tonite. ;) As it is, I'm recording my 4 laps as 2 miles, plus the 1.5 I walked around the neighborhood gives me a 3.5 mile total for the day. Yay!

We started our new curriculum this week and we are all LOVIN' it!! Amazing what a difference it makes. I can't wait to look at the other subjects at convention in a couple of weeks.

Off to get some zzzzz's......