The Mystery Basket

I have one of these! At least, I used to...
Once TWWKMT see this, I'm sure she'll hide it.

TBG - - ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

Hotel Life

I spend a lot of time in hotels...
Good hotels... Sheraton, Marriott, Westin, W...
Probably some of the best hotels I've stayed in were the Hotel Oceana in Santa Monica and the Four Seasons Chinzanso (which is no longer a Four Seasons..more's the pity).
Shitty hotels- Hotel Louis in Kowloon, Howard Johnson in Downtown LA come to mind...
Basic accommodations like LaQuintas all over the US, and a handful of Mom & Pop hotels throughout the South. They are always an adventure.


I've seen and heard almost every weird thing possible...
I've lost count of the number of times I've heard the folks next door to mine having noisy wallthumping coitus at various times of the night or early morning.
I've heard arguing couples, screaming children (often the same thing), and wild parties.
I've had the hotel give my room to someone else, while I was in it, asleep...
(And you can imagine how badly that ended...)

I was checking out of the Detroit Westin to catch an early flight once and as I was at the counter a woman in bra and panties walked up and in a very matter of fact tone just said "I locked myself out. 1253."
The woman that was checking me out looked once, slapped a keycard through the encoder and passed it to her in 4 seconds... Se took the card and purposefully strode back to the elevator.
Granted- it was 4:00am, and as a rule 2 to 5 am is the oddball-shit-happens window...

At the Hilton last June, there was the incident where there were two (quite obvious) hookers walking through the lobby at 3am. A man wrapped in a towel bolted out of the elevator and grabbed one of the hookers by the hair. The other sprayed him with pepper spray. It escalated...quickly.

The hotel I'm in here in Indy is arguably the worst Sheraton I've ever been in.
Seriously.
For most of the week there has only been one elevator working...
In a 20 story hotel.
Needless to day, the elevator usually stops on every floor, and at times it's packed.
I do love seeing peoples faces when a really crowded elevator stops and the door opens...
The see me and everyone does the math on square footage needed inside the very full box, and what my entrance would do to the critical mass of the elevator.
"I'll take the next one..."
And a huge sigh of relief from everyone within...
More than half of the television channels don't work.
The housekeepers miss at least one or two elements during daily service...
Never replaced the used towels, bed mostly made - left the pillows on the floor... Stuff like that.
There is construction going on in the parking garage, and there are chunks falling out of the ceiling, several of them landing on my car...

And the fun one this morning...
As I waited for elevator, a maintenance man knocked at a guest room door near the elevator lobby...
Knock knock knock...
"Maintenance!"
Knock knock.
"Maintenance. Is anyone there?"
Knock knock.
"Maintenance! Hello?"
Maintenance guy taps his keycard on the door and opens it up.
From inside the room:
"DUDE! WHAT THE FUCK!!" from an angry guest.
"Sorrysorrysorry..." Maintenance guy closes the door shaking his head...
"Damnit. I hate it when that happens." he says.

'When that happens'? Like it happens all the time?

And the lesson a prudent Constant Reader should learn?:
Always use the deadbolt, and doorchain/latch on hotel room doors.

Every fucking time.
(I do, ever since the hotel gave my room to another guest and someone tried to move in to my room at 1am and got a very rude greeting by a marginally clothed angry ogre...
I doubt he ever got over that image.)

TBG - - [Exit - Pursued by a disgusted hotel housekeeper]

Posted Without Comment

TBG - - ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

Experiencing Technical Difficulties

(I know - the pics are not coming up correctly...)

Please stand by....




TBG - - ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

Attention to Detail

Okay Touch of Modern...
Get your act together.



TBG - - ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

Lost in Translation

TBG - - ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

Back to Beijing - IAAF World Champs 2015

(Like Famous the Tam is wont to say, I hate using good stuff at an away game.
I had to write up the my current tasking here for Oculus, the company newsletter; 
Since I wrote it, I have no issue with reproducing it here... Enjoy.)

Has it really been seven years?
Yes … Just seven years ago, the Olympic Green in Beijing was simply awash with my co-workers.

StAss the Mad Russian, Chief Propeller Head, Ty, Ben (no longer) in Florida, The Apostle, Spongemark, SGK, and a host of others in addition to your humble correspondent were dispatched far and wide over Beijing during the 2008 Olympics.
(For some of those tales, head to the left of the page and navigate to Aug of 2008, or click the Olympic tag to see all of that content)

Ah, yes- the agonizingly slow buses to the shoebox-like accommodations, the thorough and very invasive security pat-downs to get in and out of event spaces, the insane traffic as we tried to go from site to site or to see the local attractions, and of course, the spectacle of the opening ceremonies. Good times...good times...

Fast-forward to August 2015, and we (and by we, I mean yours truly, the lone survivor from the Battle of Beijing) are back in the Celestial Kingdom, and once again courting heat stroke, black lung disease and food poisoning as we provide stats interfacing for the Really Big American Network broadcast for the IAAF World Track & Field Championships in the National Stadium (国家体育场北京 aka the Bird's Nest). The former Olympic sites are a little faded and dusty, but the Water Cube and the other structures around the former Olympic site are still very recognizable.

Your humble correspondent is the boots-on-the-ground in Beijing, with very capable tele-support provided back in Florida by St.Ass and  The Apostle. This World Championship is basically a pre-Olympic event, a warm-up if you will, for the Rio Olympics in August 2016.

I had a bit of a scare in the days leading up to departure for the event … The container of equipment for the event was on-site in the port of Tainjin when a warehouse full of chemical and explosives blew up. I was sitting on the edge of my seat to find out if the container was OK. A backup plan was put in place where I would hand-carry the equipment in case the container was damaged, lost or destroyed.

The word came down the day before I left Jacksonville that the container had arrived in Beijing and all was well. (I brought the backup equipment anyway, because you never know.)

On arrival, I found the pre-shipped equipment was in pristine condition. I wish I was in as good condition after the 25 or so travel-hours it took to me get here.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


There is a huge parade and showcase for Chinese militaria next week in front of Tienanmen Square and the Forbidden City, in celebration of the anniversary of the victory over Japanese aggression (not kidding).
They are practicing different aspectds of how they will be screwing up basic services and inconveniencing everyone this week... We got caught in a traffic holdup and after waiting on a freeway offramp for 45 minutes and a van with no A/C, I said Adios MotherF'er and walked to the site... Ain't nobody got time for this.


There is absolutely no truth to the rumor that I set up a Teamviewer app and was running my systems from the bar in the hotel, in order to avoid the traffic and the roasting highways.
No truth at all. None. Nothing to see here... Just move along.



I said move along. Now go.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My real workstation at the Birds Nest....

So China   Much exotic    Very Broadcast   Amaze.

There is a little Easter egg here that a few folks caught. So worth it.
The TIS Virus lives!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A funny story: Everyone knows that the Silk Street Market is a six-floor building dedicated to separating tourists from their money in exchange for counterfeit or poorly made knock-offs of name-brand merchandise and mass-produced tchotchkes and gewgaws.

First-timers are cautioned not to go alone, or at least to be very wary of any deal that seems too good to be true. And this visit was no different.

The crew headed for the Silk Street Market to shop for souvenirs. One of the NBC runners for the event, who we shall call "Ferguson" in order to shield him from further ridicule, split off from the rest of us in search of adventure and treasure.

When we caught up with him later, we found he had not heeded the warnings from the Old China Hands on the crew, and proudly showed off his new "finest quality" Rolex he had just purchased for a ridiculously high "friend-price." Most of us, having seen the gamut of knock-off Rolexes from the shoddy to the near-perfect, gathered around to see how he did.

In a word: Awful.

Crappy band, ticking second hand, lightweight ... It was sad.
And poor Ferguson...
He thought he'd gotten a deal.
They saw him coming and they laid the sales pitch on hard.
Sat him down, gave him a cup of tea, brought out the pretty inlaid wood boxes and gave it to him with both barrels.

Word of his folly spread quickly once we got to the site for work that day...

And to add insult to injury, his painful lesson was reinforced every day, all day long on-site. 
There is a tape source named 'X'. During the broadcast, the director will call cameras and tape sources to be used on the air, and very, very often we will hear the director call "Ready X ... Roll X!" (Rolex! - Get it?)
In the spirit of fun, everyone started calling the source "Ferguson" or "Ferg" - So we heard "Ready Ferg ... Roll Ferg!" instead of “Roll X!” all through the broadcast.
========================================================

From our "That Dude is Fucked" Department...



By now everyone should have seen The World's Fastest Man, Usain Bolt get taken out by a Chinese cameraman on a hands-free Segway...
Fortunately Bolt escaped the attack unscathed, later joking that American Justin Gatlin had paid the guy to run him over...
He had a great sense of humor about it.
Not sure the Ogranizing Committee will be as forgiving. They have zero tolerance policy  about public embarrassment. That and the $50,000 camera he destroyed...
I have a feeling that next week Segway CameraDude will be posted in 二连浩特市, (which is so far away that it doesn't have an English pronunciation) and will be videotaping yak turds for the rest of his career.

===========================================
Outta here on Monday.


Cannot wait.

TBG - - ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

OMD - Slander!

Old Money Dog will not put up with such an affront!



TBG - - ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

I Must Be Getting Mellow In My Dotage...

Sydney Olympic Park is just chock-full of bicyclists every flippin' day.
And I'm talking these lycra-clad bags of douche and their $8000 carbonfibre-and-unicorn-earwax bicycles, racing around the 6km perimeter road- not your typical two-wheeled tourist-types.

I have nothing against bicyclists in general, but these morons think they own the roads hereabouts...


(This is A moron, but not THE moron.)

Edwin Frack Boulevard is a four-lane split median road, and at 7AM there ain't no one on the road except the occasional idjit like me, and a boatload of LWAHs (Lycra-Wearing AssHats) that come zipping by every couple minutes.

Long story short, at around 7:15 AM I was in the midst of parallel parking in front of the hotel to pick up my co-worker, when a Lance Armstrong wanna-be comes racing by- 

"Learn to f*cking park, asshole" he shouts as he goes past.
Really, I was just pulling into the space...
You felt I needed insulting because you had to move over a bit on the (very empty) road?

Now... (And this is where the title comes from...)
All I could think of doing at this point was...



(...Wait for it....)



Finish parking the car and waiting for my man Andy show up so we could get to work...
(I know. Surprised me too.)

There was a time (not too long ago) that Billy Bicycle would have felt the tap of a front bumper sending him off to a high-speed impact with a eucalyptus tree, or perhaps a car door might be opened in front of him, and I'd still have been back to pick up Andy and make it to the site on time.
Billy would get that special feeling- the kind of feeling you get as you ride to the hospital with your teeth in your pocket.

But not this day...

I must be slipping. Getting mellow.

Gah...

What the hell is happening to me?

Tech Support: Notes from the Battlefield

From the "Too stupid to own a computer" file:


(While walking a User thought a procedure in Windows)

Yours Truly: "I need you to right-click on the document."
User: "Ok."
Yours Truly: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
User: "No."
Yours Truly: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up
menu?"
User: "No."
Yours Truly: "Ok... Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
User: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."

(That banging noise coming out of the server room is me, putting dents into the side of the server rack with my forehead.)

TBG- ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

All The Gear - All The Time - Oz Bike Ruminations

Really missing my bike right now...
Especially sitting in the traffic while the local bikers filter through the traffic here.

I kinda liked being able to do that when I rode here last year, and would love to see the practice legalized in the 'States.
(Filtering - Motorcycle lane filtering is when a motorcycle rider moves alongside vehicles that have either stopped or are moving slowly, less than 30km/h. Lane filtering laws now apply in NSW. It's somewhat legal in Kalifornia too, but there is quite a bit of controversy regarding the subject.)
Of course, lane filtering, even if legalized in the US (especially the South), would be looked upon as blatantly unfair and presumably oppressive to four-wheelers, and become a challenge to right-thinking drivers everywhere and Steps Would Be Taken to end such a heinous practice. (Think lane-squeezing and car-door opening.)

It would become a case that would (I think) encourage wearing All The Gear, All The Time.
Now I know that some Really Conscientious Riders (Weekend Warriors, Rolex Riders, Etc) do it, but some of us (yes, guilty as charged) for whom riding is our main form of transport don't go full kit every time we ride.
Really- boots, iron-cloth riding pants, chaps, armored jacket, rhino-hide gloves, full-face helmet, etc etc ad naseum are a little much in 95-degree heat to go two residential blocks to the grocery. Proponents will argue accidents will happen anywhere, do you have a fire-extinguisher, and you do carry your pistol everywhere just-in-case, right- then go right or don't leave the driveway.

Granted - I don't go full kit each-and-every-time, but I also don't go Squid-mode - shorts, flipflops, tank top, 110mph with my head afire like some sportbikers...)

I really should go ATGATT but I don't, and that's my mistake...
I'm sure my man Borepatch would chastise me using very personal experience as a cautionary tale, but I'm in recovery (after all, isn't acceptance of the situation part of recovery?)

Another aspect is for a rider to know his/her limitations and expectations. (a/k/a pull stupid stunts, win stupid prizes)
Like this:

Yeah- that's gonna hurt.


Moving on- I think I've mentioned it before- before heading off on a long bike ride, I like to go to YouTube and watch some Russian dash-cam motorcycle videos...
They are the best incentive to go ATGATT.



She's gonna have a problem hitting that shifter with those shoes...

TBG- ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

Glutton For Punishment - The Followup

The plan:
Drop off car near Cronulla Station, take 5:25am train to Otford, Walk to trail head at Otford Lookout.
Begin hike at +/-6:30am.
Need to complete hike at Bundarra before 7:00 PM to catch last ferry back to Cronulla.
12 hours to do 26km. Easy peasy.


You know- there is a reason that they recommend making it a two-day hike...
Looking at the satellite views from Google maps doesn't tell the whole story.
I should have taken the walk from the station to the trailhead as a sign of things to come.


I got to the station just after 6:00 am.


From the station to the lookout is a 300' climb.
Not a good way start...
I had my backpack with water, a change of clothes, etc, and I had picked up an aluminum telescoping walking stick... The stick was a life saver.
I used it in it's original office to steady myself- but I also employed it to fight off the spiders...
The bad thing about being first on the trail for the day is that overnight the spiders have laid webs thick and heavy across the trail.
Everywhere.


(One of billions)

Gah.

Once I got started I was doing pretty good. I resigned myself to the fact that this was going to be an all-day thing.
One thing that all the documentation said was that it could be done in one day if the hiker was in excellent shape.
Dude, I am NOT in excellent shape.
I'm not even in decent shape.

By about 10:30 I had made several up-and-down traverses- from the top of the hills and cliffs, then down to the beach, then back up to the top of the next cliffs to the next descent to the next beach...
And the beaches- beautiful and deserted, but-

Slogging in hiking boots across the sand will sap every bit of energy you have.
And there is an inevitable realization that when you go down, you must also go back up.

I had made it to Garie Beach by 10:45 and the sun was starting to come out...
I slathered up in sunscreen and kept at it.
The worst climb was coming up... The climb up to Garie Overlook was another 350' up a winding log and stone path. I'm not embarrassed to say that it took me almost 90 minutes to get to the top, and another 30 to recover from the climb and eventually move on.

One thing about the paths and trails...
There is quite a bit of variation in the paths- from barely-recognizable paths through scrub, to wide-open roads, to composite decking that traverse grassy areas.


Rocks in the path like this are ankle-breakers. Not to hikers: Wear boots with good ankle support. I wore my Belleville boots- had I worn sneakers I would have had to bail an hour into the trip.


Wide-open spaces. Watch for spider webs.

Another danger was not paying attention...
If you stopped on the trail, you had to make sure you weren't standing on these:


Some bad-ass army ants would boil up out of these holes and (I assume) bite the shit out of you...
I saw them swarm once early in the day, and I steered clear after seeing how fast they could move.


Composite decking on the cliffside.


Another high climb from sea level...


Mmmm. Nice decking...

There was a long relatively flat stretch (about 4 miles or so) where I just got roasted by the sun... It was a tease, however.

Pretty plants... They are probably poisonous, this being Australia and all...
(Took this pic with my Samsung phone, hence the quality- most other pics were taken with my Oz iPhone from the tournament.)

Rain was in the forecast for the afternoon and I could see the clouds rolling in from the north as I soldiered onward.
I didn't realize how fast the storm was coming. I got to the next way point, Eagle Rock at a 1:45p, and the wind was whipping and the rain started.
I hunkered down under an overhang of rock waiting for the worst of the rain to pass-
it took almost an hour- and now I was starting to worry about making the ferry at 7 PM.
I also knew I had 2 major climbs in front of me...
One thing I had in my backpack was one of those Mylar space blankets...
I wrapped up in that, covering my head and my backpack (a wet backpack is HEAVY) and got on my way.
Fortunately the rain had slacked off a good bit- just waves of drizzle...
Curracarrang to Wattamolla was a wet blur for me. It was my next resting place...
I changed socks and got going again- another high climb off the beach at Wattamolla and then off across the cliffs again heading for the Marley beaches.
I got smart going across the Marley beaches by taking off my boots and carrying them in my backpack- much better going- definitely worth the time.
One last climb up from Marley's beach - it was just after 4pm... I had a 400' climb over the next mile and a half- then a long downhill to the ferry in Bundeena and the rain was getting heavier... the drizzle was now waves of short light showers.
I got to the trail end at 6:05pm, and walked through the streets of Bundeena trying to find the ferry dock. I got to the dock just at 6:30- the last inbound ferry just arrived.
I got my ticket and sat on the boat to wait for the ride back to my car...
It was uneventful, except I could barely drive once I got to the car.
I had to take my boots off and massage my feet and legs for a bit before I could get back on the road...

But I made it.

From the pedometer on my phone...


Did I have a good time?
Not really...
Was it cool?
Yes- I'm glad I did it.
Do it again?
Nofuckingway.


TBG- ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

Self Preservation

Know where the nearest exit is.

And in this case, bring a hammer.

TBG- ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

Irony...

We has it.

To which every parent will reply: "Yep. Pretty much."

TBG- ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

Fellow Blogger Blacklisted!

Wow... Them OpenDNS folks aren't screwing around...

Hey Irish-
You need to charge more for access since you are obviously running a straight-up porn site.


TBG- ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

Expensive Weekend

TL;DR
My shits f'ed up, yo.
Working on correcting it.


Longer:


The weekend started well- the Friday night Ingress get-together was good right until the end when I tried to do an equipment drop with Steve from Houston...
I couldn't get my Samsung S2 to synch up and behave enough to do the swap.
This should have been a harbinger of Things To Come. 

(I hear you saying: What?! An S2? No one uses the S2 anymore. This is 2014, Dumbass. 2010 called, they want their phone back.)

Saturday started a bit late, but good- I met up with the crew for breakfast and we got to work. Good times, good times.

Checking messages during the day, my phone was still acting up- never a good sign..
Worse- it felt like it was running hot... Well- hotter than usual.

Well- screw it. No time to worry now-the project waits for no man. I'll have to do with what I have. 

As we were knocking off for the day, my smartphone dies.
Like dead.
Completely dead - screen black.
And hot? Holy crap it's burning hot.
Like can't-hold-it-without a 2d6 damage roll.

Power?
No- it's on the external battery. 4 blue lights.
It is vibrating now and then, just slightly. Like a mackerel laying on the dock- twitching occasionally as it slowly expires.

Great. What the hell else can go wrong?

Everyone has taken off- so I head back beach-bound...

I missed my turn off one street heading for the bridge out of downtown (not paying attention, wound up in wrong lane, dumbass move 1) and just figured I'd circle back by going around the block. (Typical 'downtown' layout, lots of one way streets.

This is when it really got fun. And expensive.

Coming up to a stop, Soccer Mom was in front of me in her MiniVan- taking the right on red...
I'm looking left after seeing her pull into intersection- all still clear so I start to roll on the throttle and look back right....
Soccer Mom was only halfway into the intersection and I was .000002 inches from her bumper.

BANG! Ow!

Oh. Shit.

F'ing lovely...

She pulls up into the parking lot...
I push my FUBARed bike up to the curb.

Bike's not rolling anywhere anytime soon. Left fork is mangled, front fender is in 4 pieces, cracks in faring. Front left brake is toast.

Personal physical harm... Yeah- there's damage.
Deceleration trauma where my cojones hit the gas tank as the bike impacted the back of Soccer Mom's car.
There is going to be some swelling... And not the good kind.

Damage to Minivan- a bare scratch in the vinyl of her back pseudo-bumper.
Virtually nothing.

Me- I'm screwed...
And it hits me... I am in Dark Territory. No cell phone. No camera to document damage.
Shit... no contact list (it's on my phone) of people to call.

Soccer Mom lets me use her phone-
"But only for a minute- I have to go pick up the kids!"

I find an old receipt with the number to the bike repair place in my case on the back of the bike...
I call them, explain the situation and ask them if they can send their truck and bike trailer to pick up my heap of twisted metal...
No- truck is out on another pickup. They'll send a wrecker.

Great.

I got Soccer Mom's info and she took off.
I'm on the curb, pissed.

It was especially frustrating as I have no way to alert anyone as to my predicament...

Have you noticed a dearth of payphones now days?
Used to be one on every corner.
Now you can't find them for love nor money.
Besides- even if there was a phone, I didn't have any numbers memorized, they're all on my contact list on my phone... (Or my iPad back home.)

I'm screwed.

90 minutes (or thereabout- I was about to pass out from the heat)
the tow truck showed up.

We wrestled my FJR up on to the flatbed and strapped it down, then headed off to the cycle repair shop in Atlantic Beach.

On arrival I realized Dumbass Mistake #2 - I hadn't latched my "trunk" on the bike. it had blown open and all my shit was strewn along I-95 & Atlantic boulevard...
Things like my riding glasses, gloves, some of my tools, and my bike manual.
Just #$%@*&^!ing lovely.

At the shop, The Mechanic looked at the remains of my bike as one would a bad cheese.

"Yeah, well- the one fork we can fix with new seals.
That other fork and brakes- pretty sure I can get those used locally.
Prolly gonna be 500 in labor and parts. Git it back to ya on Wednesday.
The fender and the other plastic- yeah- that's really gonna cost ya.
Gonna be around 1500 for the new fender & farings.
Lucky the headlights and lenses are ok- that's grand right there."

Lucky?

That's my middle fucking name today.
Lucky.

I left the bike at the shop (duh) and got a ride home from The Mechanic. It was almost 5:30.
Had a looooong chat with Captain Morgan, with an icepack on my crotch the rest of the day and most of the next.

I didn't leave the house again until Monday morning.

Epilog:
Wednesday AM. I am mostly phoneless...
The S2 screen is FUBAR as are some of the comms features- I can plug into it into my laptop and see the device - so it looks like the data is intact.
It can't make or recieve calls.

I've moved my SIM into an old Samsung phone our Phone Maven had on hand for emergencies.
I'm eligible for a new phone (according to our corporate package) in July...
I've already been assigned a new Galaxy S5.
(Phone Maven: No choice- you'll get that one and you'll like it. Or you can go buy your own.)

Picked up my bike Wednesday AM-
Cosmetically, it's bad - duct taped fairings, missing fender, etc.
But I'm back on two wheels, and the swelling has subsided enough that riding is not uncomfortable.

The new farings are ordered and will be here in 3 weeks.
Yay.

So-
Between parts, labor, taxes, towing, etc...
About a $2500 weekend for me...

The Moral of the story:

PAY FUCKING ATTENTION WHEN YOU ARE ON THE ROAD.

TBG- ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

Opening Ceremonies Fail

The Cisco guys and I were sitting in our 'office' in the IBC watching the Opening Ceremonies when the first major FAIL of the night went off...
The 5th ring in the Olympic logo didn't bloom from it's original snowflake form...


It immediately became quite the conversation starter.
Was it sabotage from the LGBT community- inserting a stylized chocolate starfish into the production?
We could see the Rainbow Commandos high-fiving each other "Yeah! We did it!"...
Some other choice comments revolved around current events and trending memes-
The incomplete logo is a tribute to the unfinished hotel rooms and broken services,
and my favorite- "Oh 5th Ring.,.. You had just one job. One. Job."
Of course there are already t-shirts available...


Get yours here.


The kids up at the mountain cluster were gathered in one of the local watering holes to watch some of the fun...


SpongeMark, the young программист ученого, Marco, the Fair Mrs. Spongemark and Nick from Sanki were in a bar in Rosa Khutor- a/k/a Rosa Hooters...
SM & MSM are still suffering from their 'too much hot water' problem.
We have Top Men from NBC's hotel police on it.
Top. Men.


TBG- ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

Hotel Issues in Gorki - Not What You Think

I was talking to SpongeMark this morning and he was relating the 'problems' he and Mrs. SpongeMark were encountering in their apartment in Esto-Sadok.

SpongeMark: "So... There was a yard sale in our apartment when we got home yesterday."
Yours Truly: "Ergh?"
SM: "Yeah- seems like they bought out the entire kitchen section of Ikea and put one of each in our apartment. Pots and pans, plates, utensils."
YT: "Nice. I have a kettle."
SM: "You'll love this... This morning we had no cold water."
YT: "Ergmhrd?"

Their water was dangerously hot- like no-bullshit 2nd degree burn possibility.
He regaled me with the tale of how he and Mrs. SpongeMark had to perform their daily ablutions with bottled water and other makeshift methods to cool the water.

YT: "I hate to say it, but man- First World Problems- "We have too much hot water at our hotel in Sochi."

TBG- ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

Happy Chinese New Year

So - 2014,
The year of the horse.

Not bad.



People born in the year of the horse are said to be a bit like horses: animated, active and energetic – they love being in a crowd. They are quick to learn independence – foals can walk minutes after birth – and they have a straightforward and positive attitude towards life. They are known for their communication skills and are exceedingly witty.

The BBC however, is not exactly know for being overly witty (at least not intentionally)...
Stiff upper lip and all that.
The hardware/wetware that does their speech-to-text translation...well, I think it has a mind of it's own.

They've recently called for a "Moment of violence" during the Queen Mother's funeral and some other choice faux pas...
But still-
You have to take the laughs when you can get 'em-

So, maybe the best of both worlds?


Hey! I got to use this quite disturbing whorsey pic again.
Huzzah!

TBG- ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

WTF Is Wrong With You People?

Let me give you a little clue here...

When the fire alarm goes off, you GTFO.
Now.

You don't wait around, waiting for a go / no go.
You leave. Immediately.

You don't shut down your laptop, you don't pack your bags, you don't swing by the commissary for a packet of cookies and a Coke.

YOU. GET. THE. FUCK. OUT.

NOW.

TBG- ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE