Pop! Sharknado

Funko has a army of vinyl figures on store shelves right now and it doesn’t look like they are going to stop any time soon.  The group has covered comics, Disney, Star Wars, wrestling, television shows, and horror movies.  There are solicits for new figures all the time and I usually don’t mention them unless they really stand out to me.  Well in June Funko is releasing a Sharknado.  A tiny shark suspended in a tornado that you can place on your desk or shelf.  It’s adorable.  I might need it.  I probably need it.

It’s good timing of course, because Syfy will be debuting the Sharknado sequel this summer; the amazingly named “Sharknado 2: The Second One”.  Just as everyone is talking about the movie the vinyl figure will be showing up on store shelves.  It’s almost like they planned it that way.  I still think Sharktopus is superior to Sharknado, so I hope that Funko one day sees things my way and gives us Pop! Sharktopus.   

Ghost Shark

Somehow Sharknado became an overnight sensation.  People were talking about it everywhere and it got better ratings every time Syfy aired it.  Somehow it was absurd enough to catch on where other movies like Pirannahconda failed.  I think I’ve seen every one of Syfy’s original monster movies.  The CGI is bad, the acting is worse, and I love every wretched second of it.  Tonight is the premiere of Ghost Shark.

I’m not going to lie; I think the premise is brilliant. I don’t like it ironically or any of that bullshit either; I genuinely think the core concept of the movie is a good one.  Someone there is a spectral shark out there that can only attack people in water.  Pools, bathtubs, rain; no where wet is safe.   If someone doesn’t get attacked while sitting on the toilet I’m going to be disappointed.   I’ve avoid the how and why the shark is a ghost because I’m eager to see how the movie handles it. 

The movie stars Mackenzie Rosman and Dave Randolph-Mayhem Davis but I’m far more excited to see that Richard Moll is in it.  Moll is best known as Bull from the old TV show Night Court.  He was also in the movie House as Big Ben and the voice of Norman from the Mighty Max cartoon.  You might not remember the Might Max cartoon, but let me tell you, Norman was THE SHIT.  Moll is playing what appears to be a lighthouse keeper who I am sure is going to be all sorts of surly.

While it isn’t Ghost Shark related I also want to mention that we’ll be getting two Sharktopus sequels in the future.  Sadly Syfy didn’t take any of my ideas, but I’m still holding out for that animated series pitch.  Instead we’ll be getting Sharktopus versus Pteracuda and Sharktopus versus Mermantula.  I don’t know if there is a way to express that and not sound like I’m joking.  I’m honestly thrilled and I can’t wait to own the whole Sharktopus trilogy.  I’ve never wanted to be an actor, ever, but I wish I could be in a Sharktopus movie.

Shark Week Letdown

(Hey Ken, why are there two posts today?  Tuesday's update is posting early because I'm too pissed to wait another day).
Sunday night Discovery kicked off Shark Week.  It should be very obvious to anyone who spends any time on That F’ing Monkey that I love sharks.  I look forward to Shark Week every year and I’m excited that my birthday usually falls during the week.  That said I don’t think Discovery Channel’s offering is perfect.  The shows are too focused on the great white and shark attacks in general.  Considering how many shark species are threatened there should be a much larger conservation message.  I was prepared for those concerns; I wasn’t prepared for last night’s offerings.

 

The first show of the night was Megalodon: The Monster Shark Lives.  Had this been a documentary about the prehistoric shark I would have been thrilled.  A shark that measured between 46 and 59 feet is ridiculously cool.  Instead this show was full of “found footage”, bad CGI, and misinformation.  Much like the mermaid special they ran, Discovery presents this information like it is fact.  I stuck it out for half an hour, hoping I could find something redeeming in this special but it defeated me.

I understand you may be confused at this point.  I’m the guy who loves Sharktopus.  I’m so excited for Syfy’s Ghost Shark that I can barely contain myself.  Why am I so upset about another channel running a shark focused mockumentary?  It all has to do with what channel it’s on.  Discovery channel is supposed to celebrate how amazing the Earth is.  It’s there to remind us how cool science it.  This is the channel that ran those wonderful “The World is Just Awesome (Boom De Yada) commercials”.   From whale sharks to dwarf lantern sharks, all of them are cool.  You don’t need made up flimflam to make an exciting shark special.

I look forward to the rest of the week but I’m really let down by Shark Week’s start.  You’re better than this Discovery channel.

Shark Week at Cold Stone

One of the things I love about my birthday is that it falls either during or very close to Discovery Channel’s shark week.  This year it will be starting on August 4^th.  I complain that every year Discovery is losing their focus on conservation and that they need to showcase more sharks than just the great white, but then I prove myself to be a giant hypocrite and watch every second of new programming regards of what it is about.  I’m a weak person and I can’t deny the chance to watch sharks (other weaknesses include Komodo Dragons, non-cartoon Tasmanian Devils, and fire).



This year Discovery channel and Cold Stone Creamery have come up with the perfect treat to eat while watching Shark Week.  They’ve frozen buckets of chum and dipped them into…no that’s not right at all.  Actually they’re taking blue sweet cream ice cream, mixing it with graham cracker pie crust, and adding gummy sharks.  In the even bigger cake form they’ve added devil’s food cake and Oreo cookies to the mix.  I haven’t tried either of these yet, but they probably taste a whole lot better than a bucket of chum.  Here's hoping that there is a good special on hammerheads this year, because that'd make a pretty cool birthday present for me.

Joel Carroll Draws My Favorite Things: Part 3

This week we’re doing something a little different here at That F’ing Monkey.  While looking through my things the other night I realized I’ve been sitting on some amazing art work from Joel Carroll.  I’m lucky enough that I live near Joel, so I get to see him at a lot of conventions.  Every day this week I’m going to showcase another piece I’ve had commissioned from him.  Some are personalized pieces he did in his sketchbook others are character designs, etc.  When you’re done here make sure to go to www.joelcarroll.com and check out even more of his work.

Today’s Joel Carroll update was done inside another of Joel’s sketchbooks, A Sketchbook Filled with Little Things.  You can’t talk about my favorite things without mentioning Sharktopus.  The strange concept, the horrible CGI, and the amazing theme song are all things that I just can’t get enough of.  I chose Sharktopus for today’s update to remind everyone that SyFy’s most recent shark movie, Sharknado has an encore showing tonight at 7pm. 

I’m always torn by cheesy shark movies.  I love sharks; I don’t want to see them vilified.  On the other hand, I can’t get enough of seeing them take down people.  I think Discovery has lost its way with their Shark Week programming.  That conservation message is still there, it’s just getting harder to see through all of the Great White programming. 

Harryhausen and Sharknado

Thursday night is going to be packed with movie greatness and I wanted to make sure everyone knew what was coming so they could prepare in advance.  Turner Class Movies is having a memorial tribute night to Ray Harryhausen.  Harryhausen was a master at stop motion animation and they have some of his best work lined up. 

At 8pm it all starts with the classic Jason and the Argonauts.  You’ve seen the skeletons with their shields and their swords, now see the whole thing.  Seriously, I love those guys.  At 10pm is The Golden Voyage of Sinbad.  Followed at 12am by Sinbad and the Eye of the Tiger.  If you’re up for staying up really late or are setting up your DVR Earth Vs. the Flying Saucers is on at 2am and The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms is on at 3:30am. 

If you want something more modern there is Syfy’s premiere of Sharknado.  If you think Sharknado sounds like a tornado full of sharks you’d be right.  Why is there a tornado full of sharks?  Because it’s awesome.  Because it’s cheesy as all hell.  Because it’s a Syfy original movie.  I can’t resist a bad shark movie, it’s a weakness of mine.  I don’t know who is coming up with movie ideas over at Syfy but I hope they never stop.

Flash Friday: Shark Week!

Happy Flash Friday everyone! In case it hasn’t been obvious it is it is also Shark Week over at the Discovery Channel. Discovery forgot it was still in the middle of Shark Week and decided to run episodes of Gold Rush all day. If you’re like me and need a steady stream of shark related media that just won’t do. But today is Flash Friday, how can I make it also about Shark Week? Warning, this may be the dumbest thing I’ve ever posted. It may also be the greatest.

Shark Flash! An innocent mako is swimming though a chemical spill when it is struck by lightning; instead of being instantly killed it is granted super-speed! The shortfin mako is already thought to be the fastest shark. It has been recorded swimming at speeds of 20 miles per hour. The fastest human swimmers haven’t even been able to reach 6 miles per hour. If any shark was going to be the Flash it would have to be the mako.

Also, if you prefer your Shark Flash in the new 52 style….

Because I’m sick in the head I started thinking about other members of the Justice League and what shark they’d be. Superman would be the great white. That’s a pretty simple one. I think Batman would be a bull shark. They are ruthless and they’re able to swim into fresh water. Green Lantern would be a smooth lantern shark. I mean lantern is already in the name, it’s an easy one. I’m still thinking about the others.

Shark Week: The Jaws Edition

Shark Week is in full swing over at the Discovery channel. Tonight they are premiering the special, “How Jaws Changed the World.” I’ve already got my DVR set, but I’m sure I’ll be watching this one as it airs. Jaws is without a doubt one of my favorite movies and it’s probably the reason I love the lesser shark movies too. I’ve never thought about real life sharks as monsters though, way before I saw Jaws I had already fallen in love with the hammer head.

In an amazing coincidence Jaws was just released on BluRay. Shark Week is thick with commercials for it. As soon as I saw the first commercial the voice in my head screamed at me, “We need that!” That impulse is why at one point I somehow found myself owning 3 different versions of Jaws on DVD. I’m down to two now, and I need to compare the two editions I currently have and find a home for the other.

To further cement the Jaws/Shark Week connection there are currently two mobile phone games based on Jaws that are free to download during Shark Week! I’m on an iPhone so I can only vouch for their App Store, if you use something else you’ll have to check for yourself. The games are Jaws and Jaws Revenge. The Jaws game has you playing sheriff. The first stage has a beach full of swimmers and you have to flick them towards the shore. Jaws will swim across the beach and try to eat your vacationers, so you’ll have to maneuver the swimmers out of the shark’s path.

Other stages have you out in the open water. There isn’t a beach to flick your swimmers to; instead you also have to control rescue boats. The boats hold different amounts of people, so you’ll have to juggle all of these things to keep everyone from becoming shark food. It’s a fun diversion, but honestly if it wasn’t a free app I wouldn’t have downloaded it.

Jaws Revenge on the other hand is something I can see myself wasting a huge amount of time on. If you’ve ever played the Flash game Miami Shark you’ll be very familiar with this. You’re Jaws in this version, a very hungry version of Jaws. Pressing on the screen allows the shark to dive down, releasing sends it launching through the air. The game is full of things to eat; fish, birds, divers, skiers, etc. It is non-stop carnage.

The game does give you objectives. Things like eat 7 skiers before you reach the third buoy. When you meet these objectives you’re rewarded with shark tooth coins. Those coins allow you to upgrade your shark. Bigger health bars, more damaging bites, and others will help you hit your objectives faster and allow you to cause even more destruction. I downloaded both of these games while watching Sharkzilla last night and I think my shark in Jaws Revenge is already level 4.

Mako Up Close

Guy Harvey is a well know wildlife artist and conservationist. While he was filming a blue marlin he got surprised by a giant mako shark. Make sure you have your speakers on for this one, the audio alone is worth it.

I love how the mako turns its head to look at him. It’s an absolutely beautiful shark. I don’t think I’ve ever seen another video that properly showed just how fact the mako is. This video nails it. Harvey estimates that the shark was around 10 feet long and 600 pounds.

Shark Week is coming soon and after reading some of the new shows coming I’m saddened to say that from what I’ve seen announced it looks like it is going to be another great white fest. The above video shows that a shark doesn’t have to be a great white to me interesting. I’m still hoping Discovery will be showing us lots of tiger, mako, and hammer heads; but I think we’ll just get jumping great whites again. Jumping great whites are exciting, but there are other fish in the sea.

Piranhaconda

It’s been a long week, but I’m excited today. Tonight is the SciFi channel’s premiere of Piranhaconda! Yes, this is another of those cheaply put together movies where hoards of people are eaten by giant CGI monsters. Each of these movies has to have some kind of hook to make themselves different than the others. Are two kinds or monsters fighting, is there something super unique about this monsters, or in what is becoming my favorite, is the monster an amalgam of two other things.

Piranhaconda’s plot seems to be too good to be true. A low budget horror movie crew has traveled to the Amazon jungle to create a film. What they don’t know is they’ve picked an area inhabited by a enraged piranha/anaconda hybrid. What would make such a majestic creature angry? How about someone stealing its eggs?

Michael Madson (Vic Vega aka Mr. Blonde) is getting top billing in this one. It also starts Rachel Hunter famous for being on the cover of Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Editions and being the ex-Mrs. Rod Stewart. She’s been in other things, but I think her best acting has been in the video for Fountains of Wayne’s “Stacey’s Mom.” The rest of the cast, well it really isn’t important. The real star of this one is going to be the Piranhaconda.

If you have a lot of time to kill tonight, SciFi is following the showing of Piranhaconda with my all time favorite, Sharktopus. Both of these movies were produced by Roger Corman, maybe we’ll see the day where the two meet. Okay, I admit that this is just a desperate plea for more Sharktopus.

Also, I wanted to add this quick note. I had ignored Jersey Shore Shark Attack because I thought it looked ridiculous. It is ridiculous, ridiculously hilarious. The parody is so over the top that I was laughing through the whole thing. Totally worth checking out.

Bait

It’s time for more movie trailers! And it is another shark movie! Bait has the main characters trapped in a supermarket when a tsunami hits the area. So then the characters are trapped in a flooded supermarket. No word yet if they movie got the rights to use the Clash’s “Lost in the Supermarket.” With the area now full of water there is only one thing that can logically happen; a shark swims into the supermarket. Seems like a perfect place to swim when you’re hungry.

The details are still pretty iffy on the release date, but it looks like it will be sometime in September. There is a scene in the trailer that is very reminiscent of a scene in the movie Deep Star Six, which I loved as a kid. Needless to say I’m on board with this one; I can’t wait till it comes out.

And if the thought of sharks swimming around town during a flood sounds farfetched, check out the Carbrook Golf Club in Brisbane. At their 14th tee they have six bull sharks swimming around in one of their water hazards. The sharks have been there for years, in the early 90s the Logan river had flooded and the sharks found themselves stranded after the water receded. The sharks are actually breeding in the lake and the golf course has thoroughly embraced having them around.

2-Headed Shark Attack

There are a lot of shark movies out there; to my knowledge there is only one movie with a 2-headed shark. Now I very strongly believe that sharks are not monsters and we really need to step up our conservation efforts to save them. That being said, I love a shark attack movie. Good, bad, or silly; I will watch them all. So months ago when I heard about 2-Headed Shark Attack I knew I had to see it. It took a little while for me to do so, the movie came out on Blu-Ray on January 31st. Honestly I knew I wanted to see it, I just wasn’t sure if it was worth 20 bucks. Thankfully this movie is currently on Netflix.

The movie centers on a Semester at Sea school group that is attacked by a 2-headed shark. At the start of the movie their ship, the Sea King, runs into a dead shark. The dead shark slams into the bottom of the boat and destroys the propellers. The 2-headed shark also is attacking the boat and manages to break the radio antenna. Honestly I re-watched this sequence a few times. What exactly is happening and why is very hard to figure out. End result is that the Sea King is stranded, taking on water, and has no way to contact the rest of the world.

The man in charge of the expedition is Professor Babish; who is played by Bachelor star and brother of Jerry O’Connell, Charlie O’Connell. The Professor wants to ferry all the kids over to the atoll while his co-captain and crew make repairs to the Sea King. His wife, played by Carmen Electra, doesn’t like the idea and plans to stay on the Sea King. Because of this, Carmen spends the first third of the movie sunbathing on the ship. Among the 15 students is Brooke Hogan.

We have to talk about the shark now. There are no grand science experiments or secret weapon testing in this one, the 2-headed shark is just a freak of nature that somehow survived in nature. Because it has two heads, it is also doubly sensitive electric current in the water. This is the reasoning for it attacking boat motors and things like that. It does not explain how it can eat 20+ people in an hour and still be hungry. The CGI is extremely un-even. Some shots are fairly well done; then there are times where the shark in the HotWheels commercial looks more realistic.

All of the things you would expect to happen here happen. The co-captain trying to make repairs to the boat is eaten. Three teens go “skinny dipping” and are eaten. They call it skinny dipping, but if you’re only topless can you really call it that? Actually almost everyone in this one gets eaten. The body count is pretty massive. The attacks are usually set up so the shark can kill two people at the same time; although there are a few times when one person is ripped apart by both heads.

So after all of that, how is it? This is an Asylum movie through and through; bad special effects, laughable premise, and bad actors. If you don’t like the Sci-Fi Channel’s original movies you aren’t going to like this. I had a good time with this one, mainly because it kept getting more and more absurd. This is a rental though, I can’t really say it is one I need to own. Grab it from Netflix and watch with some friends.

Smile, You Son Of A Bitch!

So Universal had announced that they are closing the "Jaws" ride at Universal Orlando effective on January 2, 2012. This news makes me very sad. I have a personal connection with this ride, as when I first moved to Orlando I was a skipper on said ride. It was a fantastic experience and I had a blast shooting that shark 50 times a day. Pun intended.



As it happens, Ken was on my boat at one point and I used his name for the skipper on the sunken boat in my act. I thought it was clever, leave me alone. So as "Jaws" goes the way of the "Ghostbusters" stage show and "King Kong" lets hope that they don't replace it with another boring thing like "Twister", damn that attraction sucks. So everyone remember to keep your hands and feet inside the boat at all times.

I never had to wear that stupid hat, just in case you were wondering. Also as we are talking about one of the best movies ever, this made me chuckle. Thanks to Steve Niles for finding this gem.

So folks how do you feel about this news? Ever been on the ride? As always Let Your F'ing Voice Be Heard in the comments or on our facebook page. "Farewell and adieu to you, Spanish Ladies..."

Shark Pool

There are three videos I keep watching on Youtube lately.  One of them would really only be funny to people familar with Warhammer, one is 30 seconds of Star Wars silliness, and then there is Shark Pool.  I can't properly express how much I love this video. 

Florida Sharks

Having lived in Florida most of my life I realize we are not a state known for common sense. In fact I’d be willing to bet that the majority of crazy news stories come out of Florida. I think the heat and mixture of cultures just seems to bring out the crazy in people. Florida finally made a decision that I am happy about. I realize that not every one will agree with me, but I’m thrilled about it. Florida has just banned the killing of four species of shark.

The species in question are the tiger, the smooth hammerhead, scalloped hammerhead, and my personal favorite shark, the great hammerhead. Obviously not everyone agrees with it, I’ve skimmed through a few fishing boards and read the outrage. This ban doesn’t stop anyone from fishing the listed shark species, but once you catch them you’ll have to release them.

A lot of the reason for the ban doesn’t stem from the fishing that is taking place here, but rather the effect of shark fin fishing in other countries. I know this doesn’t fall into our normal type of article, but I figured since I spend so much time talking about Shark Week and Sharktopus that other shark news would be acceptable too.

Sci-Fi Programming Suggestions

Brandon started the week off complaining about the news that Eureka has been canceled. I’ve been a big fan of the show since the first season so I was pretty bummed out by the news too. Instead of lingering on the death of a beloved show though, I’m going to help the channel out and pitch them three shows for their channel that would be guaranteed to bring an audience. These are million dollar ideas that I’m giving away for free.

First up, is Team Sharktopus. An elite government team has been put together to take down the deadly shark/octopus hybrid. Thrown together are Michael Allen (the eccentric group leader who directs action back at base), Kevin Reynolds (the hot headed field leader), Kelley Dunn the total ass kicking female who has always been overlooked for being female, and Curtis Clark (the wacky tech guy). Team Sharktopus would travel to a different city every week and stumble across other problems that need to be fixed as they hunt the monster shark. For instance when they travel to Monkey Harbor they cross paths with the town’s corrupt sheriff and eventually have to free the town from his grip, but in doing so Sharktopus gets away again.

Then we have Sharktopus: The Animated series. Professor Eric Green is the top Monster-ologist in the world. To better study monsters of all kinds he builds a mobile laboratory in a state of the art super yacht. Green staffs the yacht with boat captain and security expert Ted Hicks, fellow scientist Brenda Quinn, and Green’s teenage son Jeff. During their first outing Jeff saves Sharktopus from a dangerous fishing net and the two become fast friends. Each week the team would find a new monster, only to be saved by Sharktopus because of its friendship with Jeff.

Finally we have Sharktopus 1880. Set in Victorian England, Sir Reginald J. Sharktopus is the most renowned detective in the world. When the police are stuck with an unsolvable case, they come to Sharktopus. Sir Reginald is usually helped on his cases by his mute manservant Manuel and a trained seagull named Pancho. The reoccurring criminal mastermind Mortimer Pennybottom Esquire would constantly be leaving taunting clues for Sharktopus to find and their rivalry would be the subplot of the series.

There you go Syfy. The ball is in your court. I’ve given you ratings gold, what you do with it is up to you.

Shark Week 2011 Thoughts

Shark Week is in full swing with four of the new programs having already aired. Out of the new batch I have to say Great White Invasion has been my favorite. Despite the name it was an extremely interesting and balanced show. I’m excited to see How Sharks Hunt, which will be airing tonight. Have I mentioned how much I love Shark Week? The only thing better would be Komodo Week (Seriously, this is the best idea EVER). Anyway, here are some random thoughts from this year.

Shark Night 3D and Gillette’s “shaving in a shark cage” commercial are running non-stop during shark week. I think it is a perfect example of the dichotomy of the event. It’s like they are constantly switching from be afraid of this dangerous killer to we must save the shark! Also in the razor commercial they are comparing a Gillette disposable to Gillette’s high end razor. Are they so starved for competition that they have commercials against each other?

On a positive note, Discovery has also been running a commercial about shark conservation. You can check out this link to a series of videos about things like shark finning and other threats to the species. You can go to this link and check out information about Discovery’s conservation partners. I’ve been complaining a lot about what they do wrong; I want to make sure I give credit for what they have done right.

I sometimes get Discovery channel mixed up with its sister channel Animal Planet. But because of that mental mix-up I asked my wife a question the other night that I think bears repeating here. Why isn’t the host of River Monsters, Jeremy Wade the host of Shark Week? I hate fishing. It bores the hell out of me. Actually fishing bores me, other people fishing bores me, people talking about fishing bores me, but that man is fascinating. In fact I’m writing Discovery now to try to get Jeremy Wade as next year’s host.

Shark Week 2011

Get your DVRs ready people; Sunday is the return of Shark Week! Discovery’s yearly love letter to the shark starts this Sunday. I’m a little disappointed that it doesn’t happen during my birthday again, but I’m just happy to watch some sharks. As always there are a handful of new shows and a new guest host. This year’s host is SNL/Lonely Island member Andy Samberg. The 7 new shows are listed below.

Sunday. Great White Invasion: Scientists are studying why Great Whites are appearing closer to shore then ever and in places they haven’t been seen before. Jaws Comes Home: Shark expert Greg Skomal documents a 1,200 mile migration of 5 great whites.

Monday. Rogue Sharks: A study of whether sharks can “go rogue” and develop a taste for human flesh. Summer of the Shark: Documents the Australian shark attacks in 08.

Tuesday. Killer Sharks: Talks about the 1957 shark attacks in South Africa.

Wednesday. How Sharks Hunt: The guys from Dual Survival investigate the ways that different species hunt their prey.

Thursday. Shark City: Andy Samberg gets to know a handful of shark species. Presumably hilarity ensues.

That’s the new line-up. Much like last year it looks pretty heavy on the fear mongering and light on the conservation. That makes me sad. I understand that people want to see the big great whites taking people down in reenactments. I’ve probably watched Anatomy of a Shark Bite more times then it’s healthy to, but the important thing to remember here is that shark populations are in trouble. I just don’t know that Discovery is sending the right message anymore. I know that I'll watch all the new shows, hopefully they’ll prove me wrong.

That F'ing Monkey Search Terms

This week we are celebrating the 1 year anniversary of That F’ing Monkey. I promise we won’t spend the entire week navel gazing. In fact there are some pretty cool articles planned. This Sunday is the actual anniversary and if you’re in the Central Florida area I’ll be at the Ale House in Altamonte Springs around 2-4 celebrating.

Early in the website’s history I became obsessed with statistics. How many page hits did we get in a day? What country or state did they come from? Are they new or returning readers? I’ll pour over charts and lists of this information like it is the cure for cancer. For some reason it fascinates me. One of the most interesting is the “Search Terms”; these are the web searches people put into google or other search engines and eventually ended up on That F’ing Monkey. Today we’re going to look at some of the more interesting and/or funny.

 

i wish monkeys could skype 1
2011 monkey playoff 2

monkey transformer 5

bloody dragon monkey 1
Friday monkey logo car 1

Obviously with the word monkey in our name we were bound to get some strange monkey searches. I don’t know what monkey playoffs are, but I really want to go to them. If the bloody dragon monkey isn’t in the next Monster Manual I’ll be sorely disappointed. On a final monkey note, I think all of us wish they could use Skype. I now realize it is a line from Hangover 2, but it is too funny not to mention.

mad eye moody rooster cogburn 15

Thundercracker transformer birthday cake designs 1

the superhero who needed a car 1
yank justice 3
Overshaved hobbits 1
King Ken nerd 1
Wonder Woman getting fucked by penguin 1

I grouped all the geekier searches together. It looks like at least 15 other people agreed with my Mad Eye Moody is Rooster Cogburn theory. The Mad Eye Moody article was a pretty popular one and outside of the Lego game, he remains the only thing I really like in Harry Potter. I’m also very happy that someone out there was searching for Yank Justice and found this site. Anyone know who King Ken nerd is? I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned Wonder Woman getting fucked by a Penguin before on the website, so no idea how that one got here. When I first read it I just thought of the animal and not the character. I couldn’t understand why someone would want to see that.

Copepods 253

that shark sounds like a monkey 1

picture of a four fin monkey shark 1

I wrote the copepod article last year during Shark Week. The page hits for that one post quickly out paced everything other thing I had written for the site. I still see strong traffic to that article every week. Apparently there are no good shark parasite resources out there. If anyone has a picture of a four fin monkey shark, please send it to me. I have no idea which shark sounds like a monkey, but I’d love to hear it.  Last year my birthday fell during Shark Week, I'm really hoping that becomes an annual thing.

hd fucking 20
+nerd fuck +hd 1
doctor fucking 1
sex wight aninals 1

shoes fucking 1

cake fucker 3

Well, you put F’ing in your title you’re bound to get something like these right? The shoe one was particularly strange though.  Do you need pictures of that?  Is that two shoes doing it or someone doing it to a shoe?  I'm very confused.

Cool things to make out of liquor bottles 1

Liquor bottles show up on kitchen cabinet 1
Old people bars 3

Shot of everclear throat raw help 1

I think all of these are fun, although I feel for the last one.  Somehow I think it was a teenager trying to show off and it going so very wrong.

That’s it for odd search times. Hopefully you found it as fun as I do; or you at least got a chuckle out of some of them. Obviously because of Flash Friday I get a ton of different Flash searches, but none of those key words were exceptionally funny or strange. Most the video game stuff falls into the same category. I was really disappointed to find people looking for torrents of the Playing for Change stuff. The CD isn’t expensive and it supports such a good cause. Check back tomorrow for more anniversary fun.

Sharktopus won’t be kept at bay!

I admit it; I have strange taste in movies. I’d rather sit and watch a Santo movie the most the things at the theaters right now. I like the old Elvis movies although 90% of them barely had any plot besides rebellious race car driver hits on hot girl. But today is a special day. Tonight at 9 is the SyFy (God I hate that name) Channel debut of Sharktopus!!

That’s right; I love a low budget monster movie. Give me a Gatoroid or Megapython over another Saw clone any day of the week. After all the hype died around Snakes on a Plane, I still loved it. I own it on DVD. Monsters are fantastic and a giant shark crossed with an octopus is just so outrageous it must be seen. But there is even more, check it out after the jump.