Goblin Phoners

Goblin Phoners always show up when adventurers try to focus on something, like picking a lock, resting or studying spells. They talk loudly on their totemic phones about boring business or personal stuff.

They install their offices were you are and after a few calls other goblins show up to deliver useless stuff and to seem busy doing nothing useful.

Trying to listen to their conversations ask for a saving throw to avoid the effect of a confusion spell (see conversations). 

If you try to talk to them they simply ignore you. If you antagonize them they let you know that you are clearly bothering them. If you start a fight they can dial spells on their totemic phone.

Goblin Phoners (1d6) [AL C, MV 60’ (20’), AC 6, HD 1 -1, #AT 1 (special), THAC0: 19, SV 0 human, ML 7

Special abilities:

• Make a phone call (free of charge the first time): summon 1d6 goblins after 1d6 rounds. 
• Teleport (cost 2 phone charges): teleport self or other to a random dungeon location. 
• Putting you on hold (cost 1 phone charge): cast hold person spell. 
• 911 (cost 2 phone charge): attract a random dungeon encounter that have to listen to the goblin complains. Will leave after 1 turn if the goblin is not in danger.
• Its for you (cost 1 phone charge): cast charm for 2d6 rounds if the character take the call. 
• Conference call (cost 1 phone charge): summon 2d6 goblins and 1 random dungeon encounter to a specific dungeon location. Everyone arrive after 1d6 turns. The summoned goblins try to look busy. The random dungeon encounter look confused. 

Phone charges: 
totem phones use the goblins ML as their phone charges. To recharge their ML the goblins have to do goblin stuff, they recharge 1d6 charges each time the adventurer take the time to rest. Sometime they also use totemic chargers that they have to plug right were the characters are. A totemic charger recharge 1d6 charges by turn before burning up (cause 1d4 electricity dmg). 

If you pick up a totemic phone you can use your HP as charges. 1 charge cost 2 HP. 
(4 HP if you have a bad relation with the goblin's totems). 

Conversations:  

If someone is foolish enough to listen to a goblin conversation (save vs confusion spell) or to take a phone call (save vs charm person) roll a d10 on the conversation table:

1. The call is about some goblin business or project in the dungeon. It is possible to get some gold by getting involved. Naturally goblin business and projects are a lot of trouble. (This involve 1d6 gp (or 1d6x10gp for big or risky projects) by round of conversation. 
2. The call is about personal goblins matters. Helping the poor goblin's situation can grant a goblin contact or henchmen. But goblins matters are very complicated (and confusing)!
3. The call is gossip about a monster or a encounter.
4. The call is gossip about a treasure or magical item. 
5. The call is gossip about a dungeon room or trap. 
6. The call is gossip about a NPC party or one of the PC. 
7. The call is about goblin politics, you have a big headache (-1 to saves until rest) but you can use this to get +1 reaction bonus with goblins.  
8. The call is about goblin nerdy tech, you have a bigger headache (-2 to saves until rest) but you can use this for a one shot boost to your find/remove trap skill or to get a clue about a puzzle. 
9. The call is about goblin cooking, that involve the effect of a random potion and 2d6 ingredients. Asking the goblin to repeat the ingredients just get more confusing... 
10. The call is with a goblin totem, spirit or deity. The entity ask for a Quest and grant a blessing on accepting and a curse on refusal. Accomplishing the Quest grant a additional reward. Ignore the blessing or the curse if someone is just listening to the conversation. 

Cuckoo Clock Squid

Cuckoo Clock Squid

HD: 3+1 (15 hp) AC 14, DMG: 1d6, 1d6 (pendulum maces) or special tentacles attack.
MV: 30 (90), ML: 8, saves: wizard lv5
AL: chaotic punctual

Special tentacles attacts:

• Strangle: save vs breath weapon to avoid being grab by a flow of tentacles. Inflict 1d6 dmg by rounds. Make a open door test by round to get free. 
• Mind adjustment: instead of strangling it victim the cuckoo clock squid can try to adjust his or her mind like a clock. This inflict 1d6 dmg (only 1 if the squid is not in combat). The operation take 1 round by adjustment.  
• Puncture: 1d6 ranged attacks that inflict 1d4 dmg. (range: throwing axe) 

Brain adjustments:

• Transfer 1 point of mental stats to a other mental stat (WIS, INT, CHA)
• Transform 2 points of mental stats into 1 point of physical stats. 
• Lower or raise initiative by 1.
• Implant suggestion. (save against it only when it trigger). 

A adjusted mind make a saving throw each day. A passed save restablish one adjustment. The mind malfunction on a natural 1 and trigger a nervous habit and delusion.

Cuckoo Clock effects:
Each time the cuckoo clock strike the hours it trigger a specific magical effect.

The effect last until the next hour.

1. Cast Animate dead or object 
2. Dispel magic (affect magical items until the next hour). 
3. The clock doors open and throw a cloud of ink (save or get blinded for 1 hour) 
4. Tentacles emerge from the cuckoo doors. Grant 1 extra special tentacles attack each round. 
5. Curse: can only speak when the hour strike. (or other bird, squid or clock related curses) 
6. Summon 1d6 HD of random monsters (1 to 6 monsters). 
7. Slow time for 7 rounds. 
8. Cast Confusion 
9. A beautiful jeweled cuckoo egg emerge from the clock, save to avoid being charmed by the egg. If charmed you can kill to keep your egg. Egg is worth 1d6x100 gp. 
10. Clockwork upgrade: the cuckoo clock squid gain +1 to hit & dmg and +2AC. 
11. Summon a magical object, if someone take it save against Quest spell. 
12. Cast Create food and wine 
13. The clock doors open and throw 6 poisonous darts (save or die in 1d6 turns) 
14. Insert cuckoo song in your mind: save or take 1 dmg and get a penalty of 2 to all tests. 
15. Cast area of effect Hold person. 
16. Spawn 1d6+1 clockwork cuckoos (1HD, 1d4 dmg, AC14) 
17. Tell 5 dark secrets 
18. Answer 6 questions 
19. Cast Darkness 
20. Cast sleep 
21. Control dreams (area of effect: small town) 
22. Cast a area effect illusion. 
23. Cast invisibility. 
24. Open portal to a random location or chaos plane (close after the clock strike the hours)

Note: the hours effects could use some more work. 

Chaos record player cat

Chaos record player cat
HD: 2+1 (12 hp) AC 14, DMG: 1d4 or special,
MV: 40 (120), ML: 6, saves: wizard lv5
AL: chaotic cute

Once the cat select a tune it can play it for up to 1d6 rounds.
Each time someone hit the cat, it randomly change it playing tune.

The cat can teleport once a day, Cheshire cat style.

Records effects: 1d8
1: visual vibrations, displacing effect for +4AC bonus.
2: scratches: area of effect 1d4 dmg attack by rounds to everyone listening. (Invisible claws attacks, must roll to hit)
3: this is my song: charm person single listener (save negate).
4: ear worm: implant suggestion, area of effect. (save negate, -1 to save by listening of the tune)
5: reverse: force a round of rerolls (including the cat).
6: Sonic miauling: 1 dmg by rounds, -2 to any d20 dice roll. Area of effect. (save negate)
7: beautiful song: save vs paralysis or stunned for 2d6 rnds (drop weapons). (single target)
8: catchy tune: save vs spells or dance for 2d6 turns. Contagious by touching (save allowed).

If the cat is reduced to 0hp, it must pass a save to see if it record break.
If it record is broken the cat die. If not, it turn into a magical record player that can be used to play random record effects.
But each time someone play a tune, there is a chance that the cat awaken (cat save vs spell).
Each character that used the cat record will save at -2 against it effects.
When the cat awaken it blink and vanish, Cheshire cat style (dont worry it will be back...).
(Roll new HP for the cat)

Some chaos record cats have unique record that have 1d3 unique magical effects.

Chaos records are worth 1d6x500 gp +500gp by unique effects.

Chaos record player cats dont like each other, if someone play a magic record, they usually vanish away (they get +4 to save against magic record effects).

Tattooed Old Whale totem

You can look for the Tattooed Old Whale to add a tattoo to the world memory or to get initiated.
To get initiated the Old Whale have to eat you up, then it will throw you up in the spirit world. If you survive, the whale will transfer one of it tattoo to you. Each tattoo give you a ancestral memory and power. The old whale can walk on the land on two feet or swim in the water as a whale. It is possible to hunt and to kill the old whale to eat it flesh to gain dangerous magical power. This is a hard feat since the whale is powerful and it can summon it tattoo against it foes. But this evil deed happened in the past and brought a time of no memories on the world until someone started to tattoo a whale stranded on a beach. The stranded whale remember to walk on two legs and became the new tattooed whale. To prevent the world from falling again into no memory time, this old whale started to distribute it tattoos to worthy men and woman.

You can write a random table of ancestral memories and powers if a player character want to get initiated.

EDIT: some ancestral memories written by Benjamin B.:
1. A memory of biting hunger, felt in the belly, felt in the itchy skin, of scurvy and whispering in the dark, seductive madness, and then the gift of meat, the hot liver of one you loved, given freely, their marrow to sustain you, the kin killing taboo washed away clean by the sacrifice of the one who's love for you eclipsed fear.  You can taste them on your tongue, their blood.  While marked, you never grow physically hungry, and if your share it willingly, your blood can heal those who drink it, hit point for hit point  

2. A memory of pain, the gnawing cold of a walrus tusk in your thigh, broken off.  Pull it free, and bleed.  Leave it, and death will come, maybe slower.  No moss to stuff the wound, no fire to seal it, no bitter Spring herbs to chew to stop the pain, no chewed green pulp to stop the fester.  And yet, it is the memory of pain, is it not?  A memory within a memory, as you walk, limping, your heavy hand held tight by the tiny child's beside you.  While marked, you walk with a limb and -5 speed, but your hit points are doubled