REASON # 1: You’ll be one of the
first to learn what Profile Theatre has planned for its 2013-14 season. Remember, when Profile announces a season, it
announces the playwright whose writing be explored in depth that year. Want a hint who it’s going to be?
I don’t know. They won’t tell me. It’s like they don’t trust me with
information. The suspense is very Christmasy.
You ask, “But, isn’t it
a little early to be announcing next year’s season?” Sure, but isn’t knowing something in advance a great comfort in this age of uncertainty? I'm reminded of the words from one of America’s
great poets, Donald Rumsfeld:
As we know,
There are known knowns.
There are things we know we know.
We also know
There are known unknowns.
That is to say
We know there are some things
We do not know.
But there are also unknown unknowns,
The ones we don't know
We don't know.
There are known knowns.
There are things we know we know.
We also know
There are known unknowns.
That is to say
We know there are some things
We do not know.
But there are also unknown unknowns,
The ones we don't know
We don't know.
REASON #2: You’ll get to meet
Profile’s new artistic director, Adriana Baer.
If you haven’t met Adriana yet, this is your chance to give her a warm
Portland welcome. If you’re an actor, you’ll have a chance to demonstrate your wit
and your knack for dialects. (Bring your head shot and talk to her in your best
Cockney accent. She’ll love it!) When Adriana wins a Tony and/or an Obie, you’ll be able to
tell people you knew her when.
REASON #3: Profile
is starting to serve wine and beer at the theater, so you’ll be able to drink.The invitation says the first drink is on the house. Good enough for me.
REASON #4: Honestly, you have nothing better
to do on a Monday evening. The event is scheduled from 6:00-8:00 pm. You can
afford to miss Jeopardy for once, and you can still be home by bedtime. Better
yet, head out after the event and grab a bite at one of those trendy, locavore SE Portland hot spots
you’re always reading about in Portland Monthly.
REASON #5: Forget what I said about finding a restaurant after the event. Koi Fusion will be parking its truck behind the building and serving its yummy Korean tacos. Gourmet Magazine selected Koi Fusion as one
of “Eight Great Street-Food Vendors in Portland". I'll bet that the NY Times likes it too, because they love everything about Portland.
REASON #6: Get your holiday entertaining out of the way. Invite friends and
family to the event. Tell them it’s your annual Holiday Party. Wear a smoking
jacket and greet them at the door. They’ll think you know a lot of cool
people, and will be only mildly confused by all the talk about Profile Theatre.
REASON #7: Sure, you supported Portland’s
new “arts tax”, but do you really support the arts? Really? Prove it.
REASON #8: Bourbon Jockey will be
playing music. That should be reason enough. Profile Theatre's invitation goes so far as
to call the band “legendary”. Over at Arts Watch, Barry Johnson wrote a lengthy and thoughtful post-mortem of Portland’s so-called arts tax.
Blah, blah, blah, whatever…wait a minute… did he mention me and say that I play in “a
swell cowboy band?” He did!
See you there?
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