Playing The Blame Game

There's nothing I hate worse than people blaming other people for their own stupidity. There's a group petitioning McDonald's to retire Ronald McDonald because their kids are fatasses.

Excuse me moms and dads, do you not know how to use the word "NO!"

McDonald's isn't going to make you fat, if you eat it on occasion and choose your menu options wisely. Your kid doesn't have to have a Cheeseburger, fries and soft drink in their Happy Meal.

Also I don't recall seeing Ronald coming down the street, grabbing kids by the neck and force feeding them Quarter Pounders. In fact, I can't recall the last time I actually saw Ronald McDonald.

Own up, parents.

Its not a restaurant's job to raise your child. Its is also not the government's business to say a restaurant can't have a toy included in a kid's meal. That my friends is BULLSHIT!

Teach your children to eat right. Let them have a treat once in awhile. A small burger with apple slices and milk is not going to kill your child or make them a fatass. Let them play in the play area instead of sitting attached to every computer game that comes on the market.

Be realistic. Own up! And stop protesting stupid shit.

MORONS!

Sometimes I Really Hate Earworms

My good friend Jennifer was talking about having Lady Gaga's Bad Romance stuck in her head, thanks to a little to much Glee. I in turn have Paparazzi stuck in mine, for reasons I have yet to figure out

This is not a song I want stuck in my head. I'm not a huge fan of Lady Gaga. Her music is ok, but she's a little too much show and not enough substance for me. She does have one thing going for her though, she's mastered the art of the earworm.

Let's face it. If you write a song that can get stuck in someones head for days, you must be doing something right, even if it is being the most obnoxious performer on the planet.

I don't know what it is with me and earworms, but I seldom get songs that I like stuck in my head. Its usually a song I can't stand and would like to find a can of brain bleach to pour between my ears in hopes of erasing the stain of the song permanently from my memory. Sadly, no one sells brain bleach. So I'm stuck with Gaga for likely the next 5 days.

I'm just thankful its nothing worse. The last time I had an earworm like this it was Bleeding Love, and that song made my ears bleed.

What was the worst earworm you've been afflicted with?

Movie review: Iron Man 2

I'm about to share a deep, dark secret with you that you probably wouldn't expect: I love gun movies. And not, "polite chuckle, I do enjoy a good popcorn movie ironically." More like my eyes light up like Christmas morning. It might be vulgar, but it wouldn't be off to say I have a total boner for gun-happy movies, which is why I dug the first Iron Man.

Now Iron Man has never been one of my favorite comic book characters, but what with 90% of the comic movies getting my favorites totally wrong, it kind of makes sense that I can get into a movie I'm not too emotionally vested in. For the uninitiated, Iron Man is a really cool giant robot gun that fights bad guys,whose real identity is a boozing conservative playboy CEO of a weapons company. That's it. No moralistic Alan Moore bullshit about it. Any touchy feely life lessons like "the end result of global business can have dire consequences" or "respect other cultures" are out the window and replaced with explosions and AC/DC songs.

If you're still reading this, then congrats, you might just enjoy this movie. This time around, Tony Stark is hosting a year long tech orgy called Stark Expo, which is a combination of TED, Mac World, and Epcot. Meanwhile in Russia, Ivan Vanko, the son of a man that worked with Old Man Stark to create the arc react used to power the suit - who co-create the process that Mr. Stark took credit for yet still somehow ended up the villain? - is holding a grudge and creates his own more bad-ass version of the Iron Man suit with electrospark whips for hands. Stark business rival Justin Hammer realizes Vanko and he have a common enemy and offers his tech for Vanko's mind to run Tony Stark out of business. Vanko, newly dubbed Whiplash, has other plans in mind.

So there's actually a plot in the midst of the exploding Grand Prix cars and nerd references. There are some great moments of Tony Stark sinking into depression when faced with his own mortality and daddy issues, something that doesn't normally hack it in Hulktown.

If gun-candy isn't your thing, then this movie is packed full of eye-candy. Robert DJ isn't really my type of good looking (though my mother-in-law was pretty swoony over him), but Don Cheadle looks pretty tasty in a uniform, and Sam Rockwell is strangely attractive as the nerdy one-part-Ben-Folds-one-part-Bob-Odenkirk Justin Hammer. And sweet jeezy, ScarJo in a leather cat suit... I think that needs no further elaboration. There's someone for everyone. Or, if you're a greedy bitch like me, everyone for someone.

I fully realize that this might just be the most vapid review I've written. I think that deserves balloons and cake. At this point, I'm just going to avoid rating it all together on a ten-point system, because I know that while my life was not enlightened by this movie by any stretch of the imagination, I'm going to buy it and watch it on a regular basis, mostly while drunk and/or sick. I can wax poetic about the French New Wave and try to hide it, but at the end of the day, I'm going to reach for the movie with guns and girls. And really, isn't that what Truffaut would've wanted?

Age Appropriate

These two words seem to appear everywhere now. It started with Miley's pole dance and now its moved on to those little girls dancing for a competition.

It makes me think. Why do parents let there children do this sort of thing? Miley and that group of dancers both have talent, thought with Miles its questionable, but is it really necessary to make our children grow up before their time just so they can acheive fame?

By now most of the world has viewed the clip of the dance troop bumping and grinding to Single Ladies. Age Appropriate seemed to be the words that came out of everyone's mouths but those of the parents.

Why is that?

Because parents don't seem to want to fess up to doing something wrong.

8 year old girls should not be doing the bump and grind. Its not right. The thing about this whole scandal/shocker/whatever you want to call it, is how oblivious the parents were when they posted the video to You Tube.

Yes, you want to show your kids off, but do you really want EVERYONE to see them. By everyone I mean some of those people whose names are on certain lists for being predators?

I mean why would you do something like that?

Its kind of like celebrities taking nude photos of themselves. Do they honestly think that somehow they won't end up online? Trouble is bound to come from stupidity of this nature.

There are a lot of sickos out there, why would you do something so idiotic that would put your child at risk?

Oh yes I forgot, the parents that would do this only care about fame and likely living vicariously through their children, or off whatever money they earn.

ARGH!

Parents, let your damn kids be kids. You're stuck in adulthood long enough.

Orchard Chicken Salad = Yum

I finally got into Subway to try their new Orchard Chicken Salad Sub. I thought long and hard about trying this because I usually do not like fruit with my chicken salad. I'm pleased to say that it is a tasty sub, not as tasty as some of the others on the menu, and definitely not as awesome as their tuna sub, but still a fresh taste.

I didn't do the sub with regular bread. I opted for the toasted flatbread with only provolone and lettuce. When the salad has a lot going on, its probably best to go sparingly with the other vegetables.

The next time I try it, I want to have it just as a salad. If only it could be on a bed of lettuce with some other fruit, it would be fab! In fact, I keep thinking that the salad itself would be super in a hollowed out pineapple.

Mmmm Nommy.

Suddenly I'm hungry again. I think I need to stop blogging about food.

This Annoys Me

There's one misspelling out there that drives me absolutely nutty and that's the word WEIRD.

I know its an exception to the rule of "I before E except after C," but for the love of god, its used so regularly in day to day life that spelling it should truly be a no brainer.

Today I witnessed "weird" being spelled "wierd" by a mostly professional writer and I'm hoping that it was a typo.

I don't want my head to explode and the continued misspelling of this word just might cause that to happen.

What misspellings drive you bonkers?

One More For The Restaurant Bucket List

I totally forgot about The Melting Pot when I did my restaurant bucket list. I have been there, but never to have dinner, which is very very pricey. I had a drink and a dessert fondue, which was fabulous.

The thing that has kept me from going there, besides the price, is the fact that you have to have reservations on the weekend. This wouldn't be something that would bother me if it weren't a chain. However you do get a four course meal when you go there and that alone is probably worth the phone call, but I'm lazy and spontaneous. I like to be able to go to a restaurant when I'm there, after all I may change my mind about where I want to eat. Plus if I'm going to a place like this I definitely need to have someone to go along with, for two reasons.

1. I don't drive to Pittsburgh alone if I can absolutely avoid doing so.

2. I don't want to look like a pig as I scarf down all the fondue and lick the hot bowl, thus burning my tongue out of my mouth.

See, I need someone with me to save me from myself.

Behold the power of melted cheese!

One Life To Live FAIL

I was at the Ford Dealer today waiting for some final paperwork to be completed and for them to check my Airbag system, which went wonky on me, so I had the afternoon to watch the soaps.

Not by choice, mind you. I am not a fan of any daytime dramas like this, at least not since Passions went off the air.

Today was full of FAIL on One Life To Live. It was the Llanview's Prom and its a MUSICAL EVENT.

Oh yeah, One Life To Live has gone High School Musical on the housewives of America and the end results are not pretty or easy on the ears. There's not a member of the cast that can really sing I don't care what the producer of the show thinks

It started out with a slaughter of the Black Eyed Peas I Gotta Feeling and it just went downhill from there. They even did a horrid duet-ish version of Cher's If I Could Turn Back Time.

It was painful, I tell you and yet I remained glued to the TV set, like it was something important. It was so bad, it almost had me laughing, because these people were getting paid good money to murder these songs. Its not like this was a try out for American Idol, though I bet Simon would have some interesting things to say about the way they performed.

I can't believe I'm saying this, but I think I'll be hunting down tomorrow's epi so I can see the whole thing in its infinite badness

Restaurant Review: Cheddar's Casual Cafe Triadelphia, WV

Northerners won't be as familiar with this chain as those south of the Mason Dixon line will be and west of PA, but after eating there 2 times, I want to shout my praises to the rooftops. You have to eat at a Cheddars!!

Why is Cheddar's so wonderful?

Cheddar's has the atmosphere of pricier chains, some of which are in the same area. At the location in Triadelphia, there's an Applebee's, Quaker Steak And Lube, a Fusion Steakhouse and a Bob Evans, to name but a few...oh and there's also Indigo Joe's but that particular restaurant deserves a review of its own. That said, all of the above mentioned eateries cost more than a meal at Cheddars.

The menu may not feature pages and pages of selections but what they do have is great, from salads, sandwiches and burgers to classic comfort foods and steaks. They also have these wonderful honey buttered croissants that can only be described as "to die for."

We started the meal off with chips and queso. For $3.99 this was a great deal for an appetizer, especially for two. There's more than enough queso dip and salsa. Oh and the salsa was really good on the heat factor, more medium than mild, which makes me go Yay!

Both times I've been there, I've been seduced by the Bakes Spasagna, which is a big slice of baked spaghetti, only it looks like lasagna. It is possibly the best comfort food ever, served with a wonderful slice of garlic bread.

My dad, who is always my Sunday dinner companion, had an 8 oz sirloin with loaded baked potato and cole slaw. Once I again, I expected dad, to lick his plate clean.

The best part is with the tip, the meal only cost $30.77! That's two dinners, an appetizer and both of us having fountain drinks! That should get a woo hoo from just about anyone!

There's more to Cheddar's than just great food and low prices though, the place really has atmosphere, from the cute waterfall fountain outside to the unique ceiling fans inside.

This place makes you feel like you've gone to a really expensive place, without hitting your pocketbook. I don't think I've been in a chain restaurant that felt so classy. I think that's why it holds court at the Cabela's plaza in Triadelphia. If you go there on a Saturday night, expect a 45 minute wait for a table. Thankfully this Sunday we got a table straight away, but the place was still packed.

You can find locations and menu items at the Cheddar's Website.

MUST LOVE BABBIES (aka, are children automatically a feminist issue?)

So I should have realized by now that I need to stop reading certain feminist blogs because the comments sections devolve into extremist two-sides mud slinging and negativity no matter what the post. There's certain blogs that make me feel worse for reading them, and even some that I feel don't offer a whole lot of safe space for me for various reasons.

Therefore, I guess I had it coming when I read the comments section of a recent Feministe article called "On Hating Children." Because it turned into the Old West of ableism (disabled adults are the same as screaming children), subtle racism (inner city people like to beat their kids), and privilege (calling the kid that threw a Tonka truck at me in the mall a "brat" is bigoted), I'm going to mainly focus on bits and pieces of the article. From what I gathered, the main focus of the article was debating whether or not it was okay to say certain restaurants weren't for kids, tentatively leaning toward the side of it being okay. But one of the throwaway comments that the author didn't elaborate on too much was that saying you "hate kids" is a sexist statement.

Here's the part where the parents in the audience automatically discount everything I say: I don't have kids, and I certainly don't want to. But I don't hate kids. In fact, in their own space where they feel comfortable, kids are pretty cool. I regard kids the same way I do cats, train whistles, and my downstairs's neighbor's love of booty bass. (A) I like interacting with them in someone else's home because I can leave before my eyes start welling shut (B) outdoors, in neutral spaces, and in spaces dedicated solely to them, they're cool and I encourage them to go full steam. Even if they annoy me, that's my bad, and I'll either suck it up or leave. But (C) when they interrupt my nice dinner, my movie, my personal space, my bodily peace, places reserves specifically for adults/dog lovers and allergy clinics/ quiet meditation/ sleeping at 2 AM, that shit has to cease.

I really hate to go into libertarian territory, but I feel that the above mentioned situations go along with the old slogan "your rights end at the tip of my nose." I fully expect to hear train whistles at a train museum or when I lived next to the depot (yeah, that wasn't a great choice on my end); I'm going to get pissed when some jackass stands outside my bedroom window and blows a train whistle for 30 consecutive minutes. Therefore, it's fair game if your kid wants to act up at Bob Evan's, but not at Bloody Slasher's Revenge 2: Blood, Guts, and Boobies. And unlike the train whistle jackass, I can't tell your kid to shut up. That's stranger danger, or disciplining your kid for you, or a myriad of other things that get you screamed at by someone other than a four-year-old.

So that rant took a different turn, and I still haven't addressed the original sticky statement: that "hating" kids is sexist. That's something I can't get behind. I do agree that sexist actions can discriminate against children, such as workplaces passing up mothers for jobs or promotions, the brunt of domestic violence going to women and children, and "all inclusive" activist activities/conferences giving the cold shoulder/ not accommodating moms. But simply not enjoying children isn't a sexist act. In fact, I think that the implied other end of that statement - all feminists (ie women) should love being around children - is a lot more sexist of a statement.

Now caveat, Wench-readers: this is not aimed at all kids and all parents (yes, parents, because for all the "mombie" bullshit that gets thrown around - and yes, that is sexist that it's always moms - it's usually uptight dads that 9/10 of the time get on my nerves). This is a subsect of parents, maybe 15% at best, that are chock full of entitlement, classism, and white privilege that make the rest of you guys look bad. If you still think you're in that 15%, and that adult-only rules are the same as Jim Crow (honest to blog, I read that comment once), then let's make a deal. The first month that a family member, coworker, or complete fucking stranger doesn't walks up to me and ask WHEN (not if) I'm having a baby and looking in revolt or disbelief when I say I'm not, you're gold. I'll accept all your strawman arguments, ALL of them, and let your kid scream directly into my eardrum cart blanche for five hours on end. Deal?

More Fail From NBC

This Network needs to go away. They really don't know anything about programming anymore.

Why the rant?

And this has nothing to do with the redheaded whiner Coco, who I've come to despise in the last few months.

Law and Order is canceled after 20 seasons. If they could have paid the actors and actresses one more season it could have gone out as a record breaker. There could have been a proper finale for the show as opposed to the simple ending it will get in a week or two.

As it is, there's nothing special to commemorate this long running institution. The show just slinks off leaving its spin-offs to continue their runs; SVU on the Peacock and Criminal Intent on USA.

Not to worry, because you can't have too much of a good thing, right? Law and Order Los Angeles will be coming soon to a tv screen near you.

Wouldn't it be great if the networks would develop DIFFERENT shows instead of franchise shows. How many CSI and Law and Orders do we have to put up with?

Oye!

On a positive note for NBC, Chuck got renewed! That means there's still a chance our spy can sing for Sarah!

speaking of bucket lists...

So Moody's post about bucket list restaurants made think of my own personal bucket list. I found some old notebooks from five to ten years ago, and it's neat to see what I've crossed off so far from those lists:

• saw six bands on my "ultimate concert" list, including No Doubt, Joan Jett, and "a full set of Ben Folds" (not accomplished until show #4, actually)
• met Ben Folds and wrote a fan letter to Francesca Lia Block
• went to New York and California
• bought Fear of Pop (really, 18 year old self? that took five minutes on Amazon)
• formed a band that performed in front of people
• wrote for a music magazine
• finished a screen play
  
• worked as a baker (this was actually a goal of mine in elementary school. I sorta kinda did this for six month, and it wasn't enjoyable)
• "make money from making a movie." Granted it was third place in a film festival, but it still counts, dammit.
  
• made a speech that "people really liked."
• played Columbia in Rocky Horror
• thanked my two favorite authors for writing my two favorite books
• used "Buddy Holly" in my wedding
• "Fight Nazis" - I'm sure that goal was written with a literal sense (as in face-punching), though the actual action was more peaceful and legal.
• "learn to like Bob Dylan"
• learned to swim, not awesomely but enough not to drown
  

I'm thinking about a part 2 to this, but until then, what have you crossed off your bucket list? And if it applies, what the hell were you thinking then?

My Restaurant Bucket List

I love food. I love going out to eat, hence the waistline that keeps expanding, damn and blast.

That doesn't stop me from wanting to experience some great restaurants. Here are some of the places I want to eat at but haven't.

Century Inn - Scenery Hill, PA. This restaurant has been standing since 1794. It used to be Hill's Tavern. I know its terribly expensive but its the one place that I absolutely long to experience at some point in time.

Dave and Buster's: C'mon, I don't care if its a chain. Its Chuck E. Cheese for adults! I've always loved this kind of atmosphere. I want to go!!

P.F. Changs: Again, I've never been and yet there is one @ The Waterfront. I think the lure of Rock Bottom Brewery probably is the main reason I haven't been to this place.

30 East Main - Uniontown, PA: This is another restaurant that I never get to because of the lure of another favorite. When I'm in Downtown Uniontown, Meloni's always calls to me and it almost always wins too.

Bar Louie There are two Bar Louies in Pittsburgh and I've managed to not go to either of them, but not for want of trying.

Majorca: I've never tried real Spanish food and I've heard wonderful things about this place I know I could only afford to go at lunch time, but I think it would be well worth the expense, the menu sounds fantastic.

My list could go on for ages, there are dozens of restaurants in Pittsburgh I'd love to try if I had the time and money to do so. I really would love to try Thai food, and there are some great restaurants in the Strip that I would love to frequent.

What restaurants are on your list of places to try?

Sometimes Doctor Who Baffles Me

I've been watching Who as it airs in the UK, so apologies if I spoil things for those of you in the US that are watching the episodes that are cut to ribbons by BBC America.

In the last Weeping Angels epi, Amy Pond goes all leg humpy on The Doctor, for no good reason.

I realize that the New Who Crew likes to have a romantic element in the show but it should at least make sense. I know it makes it easier for them to work Rory back into the show, which leads me to another gripe which started back with Rose. Why do the female companions have to have wishy washy boyfriends that have to become companions of the sort later on?

Its very easy to fall in love with the Doctor. No matter what face he has, there's something romantic about the time and space travel that will make women go all leg humpy, but why can't the companions be strong single women? That's why in recent years, Donna Noble is the companion I liked most. When she found The Doctor, she wasn't involved and she was ready to go with him.

Much the same can be said for Amy Pond, but they had to give her a love interest so they could work more companions in the show. I'll at least give Rory credit, he's not stupid, he's just not a go getter like Amy.

The only thing that could be worse than the wussy boyfriend companion woudl be two female companions...cos then it would turn into a Who orgy...all that leg humping. Mind you, I wouldn't mind humping the leg of any of the last 4 Doctors, but that's another story altogether.

Old Bay Shrimp Fest

So I've been slacking off blog-wise and have some fuel for upcoming rants and reviews. But right now I want to do a recipe share. I found this on All Recipes, and it's freaking delicious.

Prep time: 15 minutes; Cook time: 30 minutes
Serves 8

Ingredients
1 cup Old Bay® Seasoning
2 tablespoons salt
4 quarts water
1 (12 fluid ounce) can beer
8 red potatoes, quartered
2 large sweet onions, cut in wedges
2 pounds lean smoked sausage, cut in 2-inch lengths
8 ears fresh corn, broken in half
4 pounds large shrimp in shells

Directions
In an 8-quart pot, bring Old Bay, salt, water and beer to a boil. Add potatoes and onions; cook over high heat for 8 minutes.

Add smoked sausage to potatoes and onions; continue to cook on high for 5 minutes. Add corn to pot; continue to boil for 7 minutes. Add shrimp in shells, cook for 4 minutes.

Drain cooking liquid. Pour contents of pot into several large bowls, shallow pails or mound on a paper-covered picnic table. Sprinkle with additional Old Bay if desired.

Notes
So I adjusted the recipe a little bit, upping the Old Bay to 1 cup (the original called for 1/2). I also used regular frozen cocktail shrimp, as I couldn't bare to look the shelled shrimp in the face. My beer of choice was Sam Adams Boston lager.

Why I Love Zach Levi

I fell for Zach the first time I watched Chuck. His character was impossible not to love. He is a geek who suddenly gets catapulted into the CIA. Plus he gets a totally hot girl to help him become a "real spy."

But there's more to my love for Zach than just the cute show that NEEDS TO BE RENEWED BY NBC NOW!!!!!

Zach can sing. Yes, Chuck can sing, NBC are you listening, your spy can SING! This needs to be written into an episode. Imagine the greatness. Get your boy to record an album! I know there's not a lot of brainpower working at the Peacock Network, but really, this song should clue them in that they have something that they should run with.

He recorded Terrified with Katharine McPhee and that single was just released this week on iTunes and Amazon. Watch the video NOW



This song has really reaffirmed my love for Zach...plus he was in a Chipmunk movie. How cool is that?

Ham And Cheese Pinwheels

Sandra Lee is not my favorite Food Network personality. I don't trust skinny chefs that make tablescapes and lots of cocktails.

That said, she made a recipe the other week that I had to try and with a little tweaking on my part it turned out nommy. Not as pretty as hers but nommy nonetheless.

Ham and Cheese Spirals

Recipe courtesy Sandra Lee

Prep Time:
10 min
Inactive Prep Time:
30 min
Cook Time:
35 min

Level:
Easy

Serves:
12 spirals

Ingredients
3 tablespoons olive oil
1 tablespoon crushed garlic (I omitted this)
2 teaspoons Italian seasoning
Flour, for work surface
1 pound refrigerated pizza dough, at room temperature
1 1/2 cups shredded Cheddar
1/2 pound deli sliced ham
1 large egg
2 tablespoons water

Directions
In a small bowl, whisk together the olive oil, garlic, and Italian seasoning.

On a lightly floured surface, roll out the pizza dough into a 12-inch square. Brush the entire surface with
the seasoned olive oil. Top with 1 cup of shredded cheese and an even layer of ham.

Starting from the bottom edge, tightly roll up the dough to form a log. Using a sharp serrated knife, slice the roll on the bias into 1-inch thick pieces. Arrange the rolls on their side on a nonstick or lightly oiled baking sheet. Cover loosely with plastic wrap and allow to sit at room temperature for 30 minutes to proof.

Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F.

In a small bowl, whisk together the egg with 2 tablespoons of water. Brush the tops and sides of the rolls
with the egg wash. Bake until golden brown, about 30 to 35 minutes.

Remove from the oven, transfer to a serving platter and serve.
Copyright 2010 Television Food Network G.P., All Rights Reserved

© 2010 Scripps Networks, LLC. All Rights Reserved

Next time I want to make this I'm going to try using mozzarella and pepperoni or salami and have some marinara sauce to dip.

Things I Learned About Cars

I have been in the market for a new car for a long time. If not a new car, a nice used one will do.

Well the other day I found an article on cars on my start page. It was titled 16 cars Under $16,000. You can read it here.

I can sum up the article for you.

If you want a car that isn't going to cost you your first born. The cars aren't going to have fancy schmancy features. They will likely have engine noise. Guys or in the know gals, is this a good thing or a horrid thing? I don't know. Or like the Aveo, my compact of choice right now, have so so performance.

Ah well.

What have I learned from this stuff?

You obviously get what you pay for. If you want a cheaper car you have to sacrifice options.

Guess what people? I'm more than willing to do that. I want a car that runs! It doesn't even have to be cute.

I just want a car!

I'm So Glad Michelle Obama Isn't My Mom

There was an interview with Michelle in one of the Sunday paper inserts this week and I definitely feel sorry for our president's kids. First, mom has taken up the cause of childhood obesity, so I imagine there's not much junk food floating around The White House and second, she doesn't let the kids watch TV on school nights!

Yikes!

I hope those two kids are into sports or have a really early bedtime.

I don't watch a huge amount of TV and I didn't as a kid except on Friday night, but to say NO TV! That's kind of harsh. Not even iCarly? Or cartoons?

But what can we expect from the woman who made the Easter Egg hunt healthier.

BAH!

But that could send me spiraling into the I wish the government would let me be as fat as I want rant.

That said...I'm still glad Mrs. Obama isn't my mama!

My TV Boyfriends

The only men in my life are on TV. That's how I like it too. I can drool and fantasize all I want and when I'm done, I can flip a switch and off they go. Plus, unlike real boyfriends, I can have several without worrying about getting myself into too much trouble.

Who are the guys who keep my hormones raging, when I watch the telly?

1. Nathan Fillion: Its next to impossible not to love Nathan Fillion and that's why its just as impossible not to love Richard Castle. The guy is like a big lovable puppy that you want to cuddle and play with. In the opening credits when Beckett says he does remind her of Hootch from Turner and Hootch she really isn't lying.

After all, how can you not love puppy dog eyes?

And if he wants to lick my face....or any other part of me, I can't say I'd do much complaining.

2. Fredrick Weller: I love Marshall Man on In Plain Sight. He's a big part of why I tune into USA to watch this show.

First of all, I love skinny guys. Second of all, he's a bit of a geek and we all know how I love geeks. I prefer them to more manly men any day.

I adore his relationship with Mary in the show. You long for them to hook up, but you never want to see it happen either, because it would spoil half the fun of their bantering.

3. Phillip Glenister: Gene Hunt is probably the most chauvinistic character on tv, but I'd be his bitch any day. I'd get him his booze. I'd cook his meals. But most of all, I'd warm his bed. That is, as long as I'd get to ride with him in that crazy awesome Quattro!

Its funny. You know he's not totally a good guy, but you can't help but love him. Maybe its because he looks so good in his suits, or maybe its just because he doesn't take any shit from anyone. Whatever it is, Gene Hunt is probably my number 1 TV boyfriend right now. Ashes To Ashes rocks my world.

4. Matt Smith: Matt is the least sexy of all my TV boyfriends. In fact, he's most likely the guy I'd want to hang out with rather than shag. Still, Matt is THE DOCTOR and that automatically makes him sexy in some strange sort of way. Its the timey wimey stuff.

There's also the fact that the 900 + year old Time Lord looks like he's about 12...well that kinda saps the sexy from him, just a tad, but still. He can travel through space and time, so that makes him sexy in my book.

5. James Roday: I don't know that I ever would have gotten into Psych if James Roday hadn't played Shawn Spencer. Ok, that's probably not the case, cos I love Corbin too, but OMG, James is gorgeous! How can you not love him and his childish antics in the show?

I know that if it hadn't been for his cuteness I might have given up on the show the season before last, which was less than stellar. Thankfully I didn't because this winter's season was really awesome.

So there you have it, 5 of my TV boyfriends. Actually I have more, but I'm saving them for another day. So come on...I know some of you have TV boyfriends or girlfriends, care to share who they are with The Wenches?

Support Yer Local Sheriff, Indie Bookstore, Record Store...

Today was Free Comic Book Day, and I set foot in my local comic shop for the first in about a year. I used to chat up the owner of the place at least once a month in college, but I realized I hadn't bought a comic in a good long while. So I set out to do just that and was pleased to find the place packed.

A few weeks ago was Record Store Day, in which I drove to Columbus to see a Mr. Freakin' Folds do a meet & great at a local record store in North Short. And unbeknownst to me, last month was Support Your Local Indie Bookstore Month. Which begs the question (*puts on Seinfield voice*) what is the deal with all these support your local yada yada holidays?

There's a couple of answers. Because the economy sucks for them too, sometimes worse than other stores. Because they love you. Because some people can't walk down the street and buy the latest Eels CD, a local author's book, and a giant voice-changing Dalek toy.

But maybe the best reason is "so the Big Dogs don't win." With even the heavy hitters like Tower Records shutting down, it's getting harder and harder to find a place that sells physical CDs that isn't Wal-Mart anymore. And sure, maybe that's the nature of technology. I can guarantee, though, that no software or patch or app is going to recommend a band to me better than a human (Pandora and iTunes' Genius feature constantly plugging Coldplay to me even when I tell them not to is proof enough of this.) While Amazon has recommended some pretty neat stuff I might not have found otherwise, it's never asked me how my latest film project's going.

Goodness knows I do my fair share of online shopping, and it's a godsend to the people that live in areas without these local shops we tend to take for granted. But nothing can replicate the Cheers effect that a local store can bring. I guess this makes me an old fart. But I can't be the only old fart out there. We old farts have to band together, and where else can we do that but our local pop culture chapels?