a fresh start

(admittance: I can't blog every day. I can pretend it's possible but it's just not. So I'm still focusing on gratitude but the "every day" part of this? Not happening. There. I said it. Whew.)






"You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing we call 'failure' is not the falling down, the staying down."
---Mary Pickford








It's been so tempting to feel like I've failed a bit.
I was supposed to be so much further along at this point than I am.
But there were things that came up in my life that felt more important.
And I underestimated how hard it would be to change my head.
And, well, for better or for worse, this is where I am.

But, this morning at the boot camp orientation, in a moment when I just wanted to be done (it's hard, people...next week is called "hell week" and all I can say is, after this morning, it's aptly named), my cute friend Tiffany (who was inspired to tell me about this program. She truly was.), told me to turn around and look at myself in the mirror.

And I did.

And I realized, I haven't failed.
Sure, I got a bit derailed.
Sure, it might look on paper like I wasted time.
But, I didn't take a step back.
I didn't stay down.
I'm still going.

Today felt like a "fresh start" and I loved it.
My body loved it.
My spirit loved it.

I loved it.
Fresh starts are really awesome.
Really.

And I'm super grateful for this one.


(image found here)