Friday, July 29, 2011

A Quick Visit

I got a call from my sister Rachel telling me that her hubby, Joel, was going to be in Atlanta for a day for work. What?! How could he come this far and not see us? It would be a crime!

We met Uncle Jolt at his hotel near the airport then took him to lunch at Manchester Arms in College Park. Unfortunately is was only so-so and expensive. I don't mind paying good money for good food but I hate paying good money for lousy food. Lesson learned.

Sam, Abby & Uncle Jolt



The whole gang




Uncle Jolt had some time to kill before his flight so we decided to go get some dessert at Cafe at the Corner in Hapeville. It's a cute little french bakery and we got a few desserts to share. We really should have had lunch AND dessert there.

We then took him back to his hotel so he could print off boarding passes, change clothes and chill for a bit. He took the train back to the airport and flew back home to California. I'm thinking it's been about 3 years since we've seen Joel, quite sad. It's great to know that his new company is based out of Atlanta so we're hoping for more frequent visits...and maybe, just maybe, Rachel can tag along. Every. Single. Time.

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Groundhog Day



Do you ever have days like this?

I do.

Every.Single.Day.
I mean every minute of Every.Single.Day

And frankly, I'm really tired of it.

Do you ever go through phases of, dare I say it, not liking your kids?

Is it just me?

Don't get me wrong, I love my kids to pieces. I'd do anything for them and love them more than life itself but there are days.

I think maybe my days have turned into years.

It may be awful for me to say but Sam's likeability factor is pretty low and has been for a very long time.

I feel like I walk on eggshells every minute of every day trying to keep the peace in our home. It's a daily challenge. I keep wondering, why is this so hard? Why can't he just be nice? Why can't he just cooperate?

Since the summer began, I've called 911 once and have parked in the parking lot of the police station. I've threatened to take Sam up to Inner Harbor and let him live there if he can't be nice at home. Sam's anger issues seem to be getting more and more difficult to deal with and I'm about at the end of my rope.

I know Sam doesn't mean to do what he does. It's the brain damage and I fully understand that but come on already!

When I called the police, he had attempted to push me down the stairs, threatened to kill me, slammed doors, spitting, hitting & kicking me as well as Newman. Not a good day. Two police officers came, one was a parent of a child w/special needs and both were school officers. Again, they were meant to be there that day. They had a conversation with him about the police officers being his friend but that he can't hit his mom. He enjoyed showing them his stuff but I'm not sure that the reason they were there sank in. It's like dealing with a 6 year old.

A few weeks ago I started a conversation with a guy at our local indoor pool. He was working with a group of teenage boys from Inner Harbor. Say what? He told me what he did, where he went to school and that he was working on getting his special ed certification. He also wants to do recreation therapy. I said to him, "Where can one like me hire someone like you to come help me with my son?" We chatted for about 45 minutes and exchanged phone numbers. He has since texted me but we've yet to connect.

All I can say is that Sam would think twice about hitting or kicking a 6 ft.+ black guy who played college football. It's almost be like my very own body guard. Still waiting for him to call me back.

It seems our future is so uncertain. How will I handle Sam when he's 17? Will he live in some sort of assisted living situation? Will he be with us for the rest of his life? How often will I be calling the police? What happens if he gets so angry that he beats me up? I recently read an article entitled, "The Never Empty Nest" and it's about a family that has 2 boys with Fraglie X and how they will never leave home. It sounded all too familiar.

These are things that never, ever, ever entered my mind back when he was a sweet little baby. I always thought things would get easier as he got older but just the opposite is true. He is so much harder to manage and deal with and it will continue to get harder.

Happy Groundhog Day.

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Church

I spoke in church today. I'm good for about 6-12 months now. After the meeting was over, a lady in the ward said to me, "As I watched the men pass the sacrament, the thought came to me, "and a child shall lead them."


Sam was the only Young Man passing the sacrament today since all the other YM were at Scout Camp. The line up of men went from tallest to shortest, Sam being the shortest and the tallest is a kid who is serving a service mission in our ward and he's at least 6'5" or taller. As they walked down the aisle, Sam was in the lead and as this lady said, "I was so humbled to be here today to see that."


So sweet. And true.


Here's my talk from today:


My talk is entitled: How we can keep the Savior’s commandment to “feed my sheep” by bearing one another’s burdens, mourning with those that mourn, and comforting those that stand in need of comfort. I will take many quotes from a talk given by Elder Ulisses Soares in the October 2005 General Conference.

In John 21: 15-17 it says: So when they had dined, Jesus saith to Simon Peter, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me more than these? He saith unto him, Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee. He saith unto him, Feed my lambs.

He saith to him again the second time, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me? He saith unto him, Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee. He saith unto him, Feed my sheep.

He saith unto him the third time, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me? Peter was grieved because he said unto him the third time, Lovest thou me? And he said unto him, Lord, thou knowest all things; thou knowest that I love thee. Jesus saith unto him, Feed my sheep.

Why did the Savior tell Peter the same thing three times? It must have been of utmost importance to the Lord that the 12, as well as all of us, to take care of those around us. Elder Soares said, “As we study the scriptures, we notice that the Savior ministered to people according to their specific needs.”

*Raised the daughter of Jairus from the dead

*Praying and blessing the Nephite children, one by one

*The woman with an issue of blood

Elder Soares continued: “Jesus showed patience and love to all who came to Him seeking relief for their physical, emotional, or spiritual illnesses and who felt discouraged and downtrodden.

To follow the Savior’s example, each one of us must look around and reach out to the sheep who are facing the same circumstances and lift them up and encourage them to proceed on the journey towards eternal life.

This need today is as great as or perhaps even greater than when the Savior walked on this earth. As shepherds we must understand that we should nurture each one of our sheep to bring them to Christ, which is the purpose of all we do in this Church.”

When we are baptized, no matter if we are 8 or 88, we chose to make a covenant with God. Mosiah 18: 8-9 says: “…and now, as ye are desirous to come into the fold of God, and to be called his people, and are willing to bear one another’s burdens, that they may be light; Yea, and are willing to mourn with those that mourn yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort,”

How can we, as disciples of Christ, do these things?

How can we help bear one another’s burden?

Often times we are so involved with what is going on in our own lives that we forget that so many of our brothers and sisters are dealing with burdens that are hard to bear. Are we in tune with the spirit enough to hear His whisperings? Are we making that phone call that we feel we should? Are we doing our VT and HT? Are we paying attention to the little things? Are we checking in with our neighbors?

“Have I done any good in the world today Have I helped anyone in need?

Have I cheered up the sad, or made someone feel glad?

If not I have failed indeed.

Has anyone’s burden been lighter today, because I was willing to share?

Have the sick and the weary been helped on their way?

When they needed my help was I there?

What have you done today?

How can we mourn with those who mourn? There is so much sadness and loss in the world today. Whether someone has lost a loved one to death, a divorce in the family, illness or disability, loss of job and security, people around us need to know that they are loved. Do you make yourself available? Do you know when to talk or when to listen? When we first found out Sam was very sick, a sister in our ward told me that she spent the day in the temple praying for us. We felt the love and concern of the members of our ward and family as prayers were offered, fasting took place, meals were brought in and blessings given. We truly had many people mourn with us.

How do we comfort those that need comfort?

“The need today is as great as or perhaps even greater than when the Savior walked on this earth.” We are asked to pay our tithes and offerings to help those in our ward and church-wide. We are asked to do our Home & Visiting teaching so that we are available to those families that we have stewardship over. We are asked to serve one another. Again quoting Elder Soares, “Christ Himself ministered to people, lifting the heavy laden, giving hope to the disheartened, and seeking after the ones who were lost. He showed people how much He loved and understood them and how precious they were. He acknowledged their divine nature and eternal value. Even when calling people to repentance, He condemned the sin without condemning the sinner.”

In his first epistle to the Corinthians, the Apostle Paul emphasized the need of expressing this true love to each sheep of the Lord’s flock:

“And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.

“Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up.

“Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;

“Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;

“Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things. …

“And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.” 6

As we follow the Savior’s example and teachings, we can assist people to fulfill their earthly mission and return to live with our Heavenly Father.”

What are you doing to show charity to others? Are you serving when you are asked or do you turn down an opportunity because you are too busy or don’t have the time? Do you ignore the whisperings of the spirit? Do you say to yourself, “someone else will do it”?

There are so many opportunities for service within our own homes, ward & community. I’ve tried to teach my children about service by doing a monthly service project, Service Sunday. We choose a simple project to do and plan and prepare for it. Some of the things we’ve done are treats & valentines to a nursing home, cookies to the fire department, deliver meals to homebound people, visit the grave of a fallen soldier, make treats for the Bishop’s family. These are simple things to do but make an impact on those you serve. Many people are in need of comfort and we need to be aware of those around us. People are watching us and we need to lead by example.


Read poem (click here)


As members of the church, we are also called to serve in the ward. We are given callings to help us serve & to learn things but what we also have to remember this, as stated by Elder Soares: “The gospel of Jesus Christ is about people, not programs. Sometimes, in the haste of fulfilling our Church responsibilities, we spend too much time concentrating on programs, instead of focusing on people, and end up taking their real needs for granted. When things like that happen, we lose the perspective of our callings, neglect people, and prevent them from reaching their divine potential to gain eternal life.”

Do we sometimes forget who were serving while we’re serving? My brother once said, “Sometimes we focus on the administering instead of the ministering.”

President Thomas S. Monson said: “We are surrounded by those in need of our attention, our encouragement, our support, our comfort, our kindness. … We are the Lord’s hands here upon the earth, with the mandate to serve and to lift His children. He is dependent upon each of us.”

Time passes. Circumstances change. Conditions vary. Unaltered is the divine command to succor the weak and lift up the hands which hang down and strengthen the feeble knees. Each of us has the charge to be not a doubter but a doer; not a leaner but a lifter. But our complacency tree has many branches, and each spring more buds come into bloom. Often we live side by side but do not communicate heart to heart. There are those within the sphere of our own influence who, with outstretched hands, cry out: “Is there no balm in Gilead?” Each of us must answer.”

It is my hope & prayer that we will each answer “yes” to the Savior’s command to “feed my sheep”.

In the name….

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Entreprenurial Spirit



Abby's a smart girl. I'm not saying that because she's my daughter either. She's just smart. The other day she mentioned she wanted to earn some money so she could pay tithing. How sweet is that? She proceeded to come up with...

Abby Tickets

We had a little FHE on tithing and the importance of paying it and then I turned the time over to her so she could share with us what her plan was.

You can purchase Abby Tickets for 10 cents/ticket and you can redeem them by asking Abby for favors.

Example: "Abby, will you go get my iPad on my nightstand?" asked Dad.

It will now cost Dad one Abby Ticket. No more Miss Nice Girl.

I think it's an ingenious plan.

Especially for an 8 year old.

So, as of today, Abby Tickets are now on sale. Please contact me if you'd like to make a purchase.

(please note: I will not be doing any driving for the redemption of said Abby tickets)



Tuesday, July 12, 2011

It's about time

I'm not much of a Royal Watcher although I did get up to watch Princess Di get married when I was young & also watched Will & Kate's wedding this past April.

What I'm most impressed with in regards to Princess Kate is her ability to dress in clothing that is modest....at least 95% of the time.

She is showing young girls all over the world that you can dress beautifully without showing everything.

Granted, her clothing is very expensive and out of reach for most but perhaps by her example, designers & stores will start carrying clothing that is more modest. It's hard to try and shop for clothing nowadays...try and find a dress with sleeves. Try and find a skirt that barely covers your rear. Try and find a shirt that doesn't plunge to there.

It's about time someone who keeps herself modest is a fashion icon and someone that others want to emulate.
















Lovely.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Family Fun...sort of

On Saturday we went to the Cagle Family Farm in Canton, Georgia. I had purchased a coupon for $14 for admission for 4 people so I thought it was worth a try.

It took about an hour to get to the farm. It was a former dairy farm that is now more of a field trip/teaching farm as well as hosting the Cherokee County Farmer's Market.

We made it for the 10am tour along with a bunch of other people.

Waiting for the tour to start




Walking through the gardens. All food grown there is sold at the Farmer's Market.




Feeding of the animals (with strict instructions to not feed the chickens & turkey).





Giant pot-bellied pig. Sam wanted to bring it home.




Feeding the calf



Duck eggs!







Milking demo



Rosie



Waiting for the hayride



More waiting



Watching the herding dog demo. It was pretty cool. The dog also rounds up the sheep. I need to get a dog like that for my kids.



Tib the dog waiting to do his work



The cute little farmer Grandpa



Don't we look hot & miserable?!



Doesn't he look like he's having a fantastic time?!



Finished off the tour with feeding the goats



They gave all the kids fresh-cut sunflowers



The History Center




It was a fairly fun adventure....we bought some banana peppers & zucchini then went to The Flying Biscuit for lunch and the new Morelli's for lunch/dessert. That's how you top off a semi-fun farm tour.

We came home exhausted from our trip. Who knew that visiting a farm would be so tiring. We didn't even do any work at the farm and we were tired.

Thursday, July 7, 2011

4th of July Festivities

We like to spend the 4th of July with the British. It just brings back that nostalgia & history.

We enjoyed a long weekend of swimming,




trying to learn the fine art of diving,



jumping,



attempting cannonballs,



floating,



buying illegal fireworks in Alabama,
($98 worth of illegality)



parading,



not sure what to say about this....



partaking of history,



being with friends,



trying to get candy,
(which cannot be eaten by a girl who has braces)



fixing lots of food,



eating,



making s'mores inside due to torrential rain,






I have no photos of aforementioned illegal fireworks due to standing under an umbrella in the rain watching the fireworks.

All in all, we had a lovely day with the Taylor family who are, unfortunately, moving back home to England after nearly 4 years of being our neighbors. We are not amused.

other fun things done on the 4th of July not mentioned above:

changing sheets
5 loads of laundry (washed, dried, folded & put away)
making beds
chopping lots of fruit
preparing salads
cleaning kitchen
vacuuming floor



Saturday, July 2, 2011

Kristina


Waaaay back in the spring of 2007 I started to look for someone to help me during the summer. Now, it's not like I was/am incapable of handling my own kids but with summer camps, therapy appointments, doctor visits and Sam's up and coming behaviors, I needed a little help.

I tried to think of someone who I knew to come help then it hit me, Ms. Clarke's (Sam's former special ed teacher) daughter, Kristina, who was in her freshman year at Georgia Southern.

I talked to Ms. Clarke and she said Kristina might be interested since she'd planned on working at a local day care for less money. I emailed Kristina and she said yes!

Phew!

Kristina has been helping me every summer and any school breaks she had during college. She has been wonderful. I often referred to her as my "Beck & Call Girl" because anything I needed, she took care of.

She's taken kids back & forth to school, to Sam's therapies, driven to art/nature/gym camps, helped at school parties when both kids had something on the same day. She's come to important events like Sam's baptism or Abby's drama play.

We love Kristina and she has been invaluable to me these past 4 years.

The problems:

1. She got engaged over Thanksgiving (thanks a lot Trent)
2. She graduated from college
3. She wants to actually work in her chosen field (RN) vs. working for me
4. She moved to Chicago

There's not much else to say...except goodbye

Before she left for fall semester, 2009



Went with me to take the kids to Centennial Olympic Park







Our last night...we took her to The Flying Biscuit and Morelli's for dessert




Kristina is set to take her board exams and will get married on Saturday, April 7, 2012 and we couldn't be happier for her. Seriously. Well, sort of.

There is always Skype to keep us in touch.

We love you, Kristina!!

PS....there are 4 Clarke girls, Kelsey is now helping me!

Service Sunday

Welcome to our Saturday edition of Service Sunday.

A few months ago I had heard about a local non-profit organization that delivers meals to the chronically ill or homebound, Open Hand. They participate with meals on wheels, provide nutritious meals to the elderly, etc. I thought it sounded like a great place for doing our monthly service project.

We left the house at 8:45am (much to everyone's displeasure-sleeping in didn't happen) and made it to Open Hand. We had a brief orientation as it's quite a complicated process.

We were assigned to deliver 9 meals to 7 locations in a common vicinity.

I also wanted to give a little something from us so I made these little flags last night.




Open Hand LOVES volunteers! Anyone who is interested can go help prep, cook and portion out meals or they can also do deliveries.



Filling out paperwork and "resting."



You are taken through the kitchen (thus the hair net) to pick up your bag of meals then off we went.



Our general area was East Point and all the deliveries were within minutes of each other.

Our first stop!



Getting the proper meal to the right person was a little tricky



Abby getting the meal ready for delivery



Waiting for the little lady to answer her door



After all the meals were delivered, we went back to drop off the freezer bag.



After our service project, we tried out a new place, Antico Pizza. It was DeLisH! It's kind of a strange set up...you order your pizza (only pizza or calzones are served...no salad!) then you find space at large tables in the kitchen and you see them making all the food. They throw the pizza dough, pull fresh basil off the plant and see them chopping all the fresh veggies and listen to Italian opera. It was pretty cool but busy and hard to find a piece of table to sit at.



No lunch is complete without a treat so we drove about 3 minutes to Sublime Donuts where we each chose one donut...Orange cream, chocolate on chocolate and two s'more donuts.

They were so good we had to buy 6 more.

The grand total of said 10 donuts: $18



We shared this last donut before heading home..

Maple Bacon Cheddar. That's right.




We had a great Saturday morning serving others and eating some yummy food.