symphony of colours: July 5, 2009

in his house, his room, all alone

Saturday, July 11

as he is away burying himself in 52 pieces of cards and some chips, i am typing away on my apple on his bed. didn't wan to knock myself out despite the heavy eye lids because I don't want to wake up early in the morning with a growling stomach and still have to wait for him to be awake.

hence still contemplating whether should I indulge myself in some TV series, sims or my comic.

Alas! good night world!

overdrive...

Tuesday, July 7

at work for the past 3 weeks. Preparing for a campaign which would only be launched in Oct. This is supposedly the largest campaign for M@ackers this year and I was kinda given this chance to be part of it. Was appointed this role definitely not by chance. Shan't go into details.

Stayed with bubs for the past one week because of suspected H1N1 family from Hong Kong. On the way back yesterday, he pranced on this question, "so do you miss home?". The immediate reply was,"nope". why??

The moment I step foot into the familiar cold tiles, i heard screams, cries, lecturing, basically, noise. This explains my perceptual habit of locking myself behind brown door and hoping to stay away from the high decibels. I have resorted to purchasing ear plugs so that I can sleep well, clear the computer from my room so that no one now has a reason to enter my room. But alas, the next thing I discover was this unfamiliar looking perfume bottle sitting in my cosmetic tray. For a moment, I thought my brother was so sweet to get me a new bottle from DFS, but before I decided to drown myself in the fragrance, I decided to ask her. "ohhh, that's mine.. I decided to put it there because whenever I spray this in my room, the kids would wake up in the morning, I'll picked it up later and put it back in my room."

1. the house is so big, WHY do you have to choose to do it in MY room?

2. Why aren't that "selfish" act haunting you at all? Before I know it, she came into my room this morning and started spraying herself when I was still sleeping.

When I step foot home in evening I saw the transparent bottle staring at me!

Why?? Why can't I just have my own space. Moving the computer out of my room is after a long train of discussion and begging with my brother. Why is it so difficult?

Who is to blame? No one but myself. Why don't I earn enough money to rent a space somewhere. I just need some peace & rest after a hectic day at work. This place is ultimately his. And I should be grateful enough for him to provide me with this shelter and without paying a cent. Yes I am grateful, that is why I never made any request but kept my mums until my patience finally hit the ceiling. Thus insisted in the shifting of the computer out of my room.

Staying with bubs is not primarily emotionally pleasant. Ultimately, I am no one to him. And staying with him occasionally is only a temporary solution to gain some quality rest over the weekend. But still, thanks for accommodating me.

I'm bewildered with my life. I hope I reach a turning point soon.

I wish.. I hope...