Four Years + Some Thoughts

illustration by cake with giants

Four years. This post makes 1,499 posts. Whoa.

Four years ago today I wrote my very first post and although that post makes me cringe a little, it was honest (terrible to look at, but honest). And that's one thing I've tried to remain over the past four years in creating and recreating this space. I've tried to remain honest to myself and to you. It hasn't always been easy especially the part about being honest with myself as there have been many moments when I've questioned why I continue to blog.

One of the biggest changes that occurred for the blog this past year was that I stopped monetizing it. I'm currently not accepting sponsorship and there are no paid ads or affiliate links on D&OC. This change has taken a huge weight off my shoulders. If I miss a few days of posting, I no longer feel guilty. There was a time when I needed supplemental income from the blog but that is no longer the case and I'm grateful for that because I'm starting to find joy in blogging again. I realize that this may seem rather backwards to some of you as many bloggers aspire to blog full time and making money is often a gauge of success but that is one of the ways in which I am, perhaps, atypical as a blogger. I have a 8-5 job that I enjoy (YES, THAT IS POSSIBLE!) in a niche field in which my expertise is valued. This blog, although important to me and certainly a labor of love, is a hobby.

The downside to the blog simply being a hobby is that I don't have the time or the funds to network, attend conferences, market the blog, etc. The blog itself feels stagnant and as I watch other blogs grow and blossom it's hard not to feel insecure or worse, to feel like a failure. Although D&OC is a hobby, I often wonder what it could be if I could simply devote more time and creative energy into the content I post and into the social media that helps drive traffic to the blog. And it's this letting go of what could be that has been my biggest struggle over the past year. It's the acceptance of certain failures and the celebration of other successes, no matter how small, that I'm learning to fully appreciate right now.

So as I move into my fifth year of blogging, I think I'm finally beginning to understand this whole balance thing. And it's this understanding that I'm hoping will lead to some practical implementation of what actual balance looks like but let's not get ahead of ourselves. One step at a time. Right?

I'm still as passionate about budget-friendly design as I was four years ago. And I'm as passionate about connecting with you as readers as I was four years ago. It's this passion that I'm hoping will keep the blog going for another year, or two, or three. Who knows? The sky's the limit.

Wise Words + New Blog Look

quote by albert einstein via here (found via this pin)

This quote is a bit of a mouthful but it's so true, isn't it? I was having a heart-to-heart with my sister last night about change and I kept thinking about these words. Sometimes we have to make some hard decisions in order to illicit different results, know what I mean?

And, speaking of change, I hope you'll take a moment to check out D&OC's new look. I've tried to make things look a little cleaner around here. I did not have the funds to pay a designer this time around so I went the DIY route which is scary since my graphic design skills are close to non existent. I gave it my best effort though and I hope you like it!

Overcoming Blogging Insecurities

chloe aftel studio (via design is mine)

Remember my new years resolutions and how I promised to be more honest with myself?  Well, part of that honesty thing is learning to overcome my blogging insecurities and I hope as I share my own struggles and observations, that you too will be encouraged or at least not feel quite so alone.

I've had some discussions with a few blogging friends concerning what we like LEAST about blogging and the consensus seems to be that blogging can feel a hell of a lot like being in high school and I don't know about you, but I really disliked high school.  I think a lot of the nostalgia about our pubescent struggles and the similarities we find in blogging stems from insecurity, plain and simple.

One would be hard pressed not to feel insecure in a highly competitive online environment where bloggers have no problem using words and phrases like "popular, popularity, blog stars, up and coming, top blogs, top 10, top 100" and the list goes on and on.  In an environment where connections and relationships coincide with stats, rankings, link exchanges, number of comments, and advertising it can be difficult to discern the genuine from the disingenuous, friendships from connections, and success from popularity.  In the midst of all this, that little negative nagging Nancy in all of us can pop in and say, "you'll never be good enough."

The point of this post is not to have a bitch fest friends, quite the contrary.  None of what I've said above is any way shocking or new, it's simply the online atmosphere and it's not that different from other aspects of our lives (i.e. school, jobs, family, friendships) except that with blogging, there comes a certain vulnerability when we put our ideas out there creatively through our writing, curating, and editing.  If you've been blogging for any time at all, I'm sure you've figured out that every niche has it's own cliques, it's own "blog stars", and it's own elite.  The structure that exists within each niche is natural but it can make some people (myself included) feel like they're on the fringe, waiting to be acknowledged or included.   We all want to be recognized for our hard work, our unique talents, and the thoughtful opinions we bring to the online conversation, but just like in high school,  our grades don't always reflect our intelligence and our social connections certainly don't reflect our self worth.

I've asked myself some questions that have helped me come to a good place (my happy place if you will) whenever I'm feeling discouraged:

• Do you enjoy blogging? 
• Are you happy with the content you put out on a daily basis? 
• Are your online relationships genuine or are you just out to meet the "right people?"  
• Have you grown as a blogger or are you feeling stagnant?  What changes can you implement to feel satisfied with your growth as a blogger, but most importantly, as a person?  
• Are you putting too much emphasis on numbers and do you, perhaps, need to redefine your definition of success? 
• What are your actual goals with blogging?  Do you need a magazine mention, a book deal, or a higher google page rank to be happy?  Do you need a "top design blog" mention to be happy?  Do you?
• Are you OK with quitting the blog?  Does blogging on a daily basis bring you joy or does it feel like a chore?  
• Why is your blog special?  Does your blog have a voice or does it just try to blend in with the "popular crowd?" 

There aren't any right answer to these question, but I find that when I go through my little list, I realize that my insecurities stem from how I view myself rather from how I think other people are viewing (or judging) me.  I realize that I really enjoy blogging, that I value the friends I've made in the community and it's OK with me if my stats stagnate or decline because my self worth cannot be quantified.  Ever.  Not by my salary and certainly not by D&OC's page loads.   

If you've made it this far, I applaud your perseverance and thank you for hanging in there with me.  I'd like to pose a question and I'd love to hear your thoughts and I hope that this will be a positive forum that will encourage each of us.  Keep in mind that everyone feels insecure at some point or another no matter what their "ranking"(or self perceived place) is in their niche or community.  
How do you deal with blogging insecurities?  If you aren't a blogger but have experienced insecurity in reading blogs where the facade of some people's lives seem to be picture perfect, how do you deal with it?  

Blog re-design and some things I've learned

Hi friends and happy Monday! I am super duper excited to announce the new blog design here on D&OC.  Lately, I'd feeling bleh about the blog's overall look.  Besides the banner, which I've kept as it was designed by one of my best friends and is part of D&OC's branding, I had done most of the "design work" which really just consisted of a bunch of hodge podge widgets thrown together.  I felt like D&OC needed to be taken to the next level visually, to be more of an accurate reflection of my aesthetic, and to be more user friendly for you lovely readers.  I thought I'd offer some blog re-design tips for any of you looking to hire an outside designer for the job.  

• Decide whether you want to do DIY or hire someone.  My training is in painting, not graphic design and although I've learned a lot the past couple of years blogging, I did not feel like I had the "know how" to do a re-design myself.  And, frankly, I didn't have the patience or time to try.
• My next step was to decide upon a budget for the re-design.  Many times, you tend to get what you pay for and I had no intentions of compromising the quality of design to save a buck; however, the cost had to fit within my means.  D&OC is not a new blog and I already had a banner and overall look that I was going for, so I wasn't going to need a ton of mock-ups or original designs for branding.  If you're starting from scratch, expect to pay more.
• I wasn't sure where to begin on finding a designer, so I tweeted about it!. I was specially looking for someone who works with the Blogger platform as opposed to Wordpress.  I've decided to stick with Blogger, for now, so I wanted to hire someone who very familiar with the quirks and features. I got lots of recommendations and got to work visiting sites, reviewing portfolios and comparing prices.  The most important detail for me was finding someone who's design aesthetic was closest to what I was looking for.  I definitely recommend figuring out the "look" you're wanting PRIOR to picking a designer.
• After compiling a list of potential designers, I remembered that my blog friend Rachel from Lovely Clusters does design so I decided to shoot her an e-mail.  I explained clearly what I would be needing and what I wouldn't be needing (this is important if you're getting quotes from people).  I then told her my budget and much to my relief, she agreed to take the job!
• Working with someone I've collaborated with in the past was a big relief because Rachel was already familiar with D&OC, she knows how I communicate, and I felt like I could be completely open with my concerns.  Rachel was incredibly professional, fast as lightening, and super easy to work with.  Handing over my blog for someone to mess with was very nerve racking (what if it got deleted accidentally?!) but Rachel simply exudes confidence, so I was put at ease.
• I suggest working out a payment plan with your designer (i.e. deposit, portion after mock ups, rest after coding, etc.) so that you don't hand all of the money over and then not know what to do if you're disappointed with the design.   Make sure your designer is legit by carefully reviewing the portfolio and perhaps getting recommendations from prior clients.  Do the legwork before hiring someone and be as clear as possible about what you're needing, otherwise you might end up miscommunicating your needs.

I hope your enjoy the new design as much as I do.  New pages have been added including an "about" page, info on advertising on D&OC, and a description of D&OC II.  A HUGE thank you to Rachel for an amazing job! Checkout Ironwood Design Studio for more of Rachel's work.  I'd love to hear your thoughts on your own blog design/re-design experiences or any tips you might have about the process.

xo,

Christina

image: Oh Deer (£18.00) Keep Calm Gallery

On blogging...

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I don't think I've ever written about the act of blogging because I realize many of you are not bloggers and could care less, but some of you are and a handful of you have asked me personally about my opinion on successful blogging, growing a blog, and simple "how to" questions concerning blogging.  I've written countless e-mails attempting to answer a variety of questions and with each e-mail I write, I realize that I know much less than I'd like to think I do and what does my opinion matter anyway?
Well, in my relatively short time blogging (1 year 3 mos) I have kept my eyes wide open, paying attention to certain blogging trends, certain blogging groups or "cliques", how people relate to one another in an online community, etc. I've payed special attention to "blogger rants", certain bloggers trying to correct a mindset of new bloggers, the "do's" and "don't" of giveaways and sponsorship, bloggers openly praising or berating themselves for growth, lack of growth, talking about numbers openly: stats, followers, comments, hits (it always goes back to the numbers, doesn't it?).  Frankly, it makes my head hurt.
If I could go back and re-write all of those e-mails I responded to, I would and I would say one thing, "Above all, be kind."  If you want to grow your blog, and I don't just mean numbers here, be kind, be genuine, simply be nice.  If someone takes their time to write you a personal e-mail, why not take the time to thank them?  If someone consistently comments on your blog, why not take the time to check out what they're talking about on their own space?  Being kind doesn't mean not be discerning and it certainly doesn't mean being a pushover or being fake.  I've met a lot of amazing, sweet, talented individuals in the blogging community.  I've also met some manipulative, self-serving individuals and I've encountered snobby, pretentious bloggers as well.  The online community is no different than the real world in that it takes all kinds and you don't have to be friends with everyone but you should be nice.
I've spent some time in the Etsy forums recently and I am astounded and shocked at some of the negative, cruel things people say to one another. Instead of supporting each other, there seems to be a preference to throw elbows in an effort to shove themselves to the top.  On the flip side, I'm encouraged when I see crafters and bloggers cheering each on, offering metaphorical high fives, and saying kind words to one another. There's plenty of that on the forums too, you just have to look a little harder (you better bet your behind that I choose what blogs I read and where I shop based on this too).
I've personally struggled lately with blogging because I've noticed a trend of negativity and elitism, but then I come back here and I get a kind comment from one of you and am reminded that D&OC is a place of positivity.  I'm reminded that I don't have to insult someone else to feel good about myself or this blog.  I'm reminded that success isn't a number, or a mention, or a link.  Thank you for your kindness, for your support, and for your positivity. 
*Hugs*
Christina