Shayne Ward's heart is in the right place, kind of

Shayne Ward has given an interview to Attitude, in which he sort-of says the right things, but not quite:

I get called gay all the time. Normally, from a jealous boyfriend of a girl who’s a fan or a group of guys in a pub shouting at me because I’m a pop star. It doesn’t bother me. I am very thick skinned and can handle situations very well. Plus half of the idiots shouting abuse are probably hiding in the closet and fancy me as well. Ha! I’ve always known I was straight thanks to my brother’s collection of magazines. I love boobs. If I were gay my family are amazing and wouldn’t shut out anyone. They’d never have a problem if any of my family said they were gay. Only welcoming arms full of love!”

First of all: Shayne, honey: your last top ten single was in 2007, nobody is doing anything because you're a "pop star".

It sounds all vaguely positive, though: I don't mind if people call me gay, and even if I was, my family wouldn't mind.

Except, leaving aside the complete erasure of the possibility of bi or pansexuality from his world, there's something problematic about the suggestion that being called gay is something that requires "a thick skin". And the "they're calling me gay because they're probably gay" is hardly very socially aware when you come to it.

But mostly, it's the pop star thing.

Gordon in the morning: Arthur life

Whatever happened to James Arthur, eh? The X Factor winner's single is out now, and Gordon is excited:

JAMES ARTHUR’s Impossible had sold a whopping 187,000 copies by midnight on Monday after just 24 hours on sale.

That sounds interesting, except when you compare it with how earlier winners did.

Leona Lewis sold 50,000 downloads of A Moment Like This in the first half hour. And even Shayne Ward managed over 300,000 copies in the first two days and nearly three quarters of a million in the first five.

It all makes Arthur's sales look a little underpowered. But he's got a few more days to make the numbers up.

Gordon in the morning: If you have tears...

You'd have to be made of the coldest granite not to have a small pang of heartbreak at the desperation of poor Shayne Ward:

FORMER X Factor winner SHAYNE WARD hopes to profit from the show's US exposure by breaking into Hollywood.
[...]
A source said: "Shayne feels it's the time to strike. Being linked with X Factor might help him get noticed."

It might do; I'm sure that there's every chance Aaron Sorkin will be watching The X Factor this week and think "hey, I wonder if the British version of this ever churned out a winner a few years back who has decided to swap from singing to acting who would be perfect for the lead role in my new drama series.

Is that a tear in your eye, Louis Walsh?

Like a man sobbing as he throws kittens down the well, Louis Walsh regrets having to let Shayne Ward go:

"I thought Shayne had the X factor," Walsh told the Daily Mail. "I thought he ticked every single box. He had the looks, the talent, the ability, the attitude and the ambition. I believed in him 100%.

"I gave blood, sweat and tears in working with him - I absolutely did. Then there was no record, it all dried up."

He continued: "There was nothing I could do at all. My hands were tied. I only wish him the best because I think he's a great guy. But I reluctantly had to let him go."

Yes, what could Louis do? He believed so wholeheartedly in Shayne, and yet there was no single. It's not like Louis was Ward's manager or anything, was it? He wasn't the man responsible for Ward's career and the person whose job it was to ensure the record got released, right?

Oh, really?

Still, Ward is still notionally signed to Syco, and has a new manager, Alan Edwards:

"I'm not surprised that Simon has not dropped Shayne because he really is a great singer," Edwards told the paper. "When he offered to play me some of his new tracks, he blew me away.

"I presumed it would be formulaic music, but it was very free feeling. I know Shayne's fans have missed him but music is art - it can't be rushed. I think that a bit of time between now and his last album could be an advantage - it puts a bit of distance between him and the show."

Brilliant - Shayne's now got a manager who believes he has the X Factor, and who is convinced that he has the talent to succeed. Again. What could go wrong? This time?

Ward seeks creative control

Having released two albums of pointless froth that the people who shape his career have successfully predicted will fly off the shelves of Asda, Shayne Warne has decided that album three should have more of him in it. He wants to write:

"When you come from a talent show and you're signed by a record label, you're in no position to say I want this or that," Shayne told the Liverpool Daily Post. "It's about respect and showing them I'm on the same wavelength as them, and on the third album I'll be writing the songs as well."

But if you're "on the same wavelength", then what's the actual problem? "I want to write so that I can do things, erm, exactly the same way they've been done so far."

Ward, it seems, is a little worried he's not getting enough respect:

"I've had huge sales in Asia and South Africa and Australia, and they're not easy markets to crack," he explained. "Australia is on board. I toured Asia before and after Christmas.

"People need to realise that I'm not just a UK name. I'm more international. I've spent eight months in studios in the US and Sweden. Now I'm preparing for a UK tour and before then I'll tour in Scandinavia."

Why, exactly, do people "need to realise" that, Shayne? And are you really sure you're a "UK name" anyway?

Best of all, though, is the way that Ward thinks that "spending time in studios" in a place is, in someway, akin to "being a household name" in that place.

We wish Shayne the best of luck in taking more control of what he clearly thinks of as some long-running global career. A brave move in an economic downturn when plan B (or rather, Plan job-at B and-Q) might not be quite as strong as it once was.

X Factor loses it

Not only is Dannii's single struggling, but further evidence that the X Factor brand isn't a guarantee of gold: Tonight's X Factor now and then live extravaganza has been axed after only 165 tickets were sold for a 3,000 seat venue.

The inaptly named Futureproof, Ben Mills and somebody called Andy Abraham had apparently been going to show up, although had they done so, they'd have been outnumbering the audience.

Wonderfully, the promoter is placing the blame on this year's contest:

Alan Ruck-Nightingale, the event promoter, said: "It's a huge shame and I can't quite grasp why sales haven't gone well.
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"There's been no lack of marketing, in the Advertiser and on radio and a 30,000 leaflet drop to houses.

"I don't think this year's X Factor competition has had such good competitors, so maybe that's been part of it."

Yes, that'd be it. "Shall we go and see this bloke off the telly from a couple of years ago, love?" "Ooh, no, because this year's contestants are a bit rubbish..."

As James P pointed out when he alerted us to this story, the people of Swindon will pay for their inaction:

They'll be kicking themselves though, the people of Swindon; After cancelling this concert, the organisers have also scrapped plans for a follow-up gig with even bigger names. But alas thanks to audience apathy, Swindon will no longer be treated to the double-header pop-monster that would have been Shayne Ward and Chico.