25 years ago today: Bates on the wall

If yesterday was the 25th anniversary of the fall of The Berline Wall, that makes this morning the 25th anniversary of Simon Bates turning up in the city to do the Golden Hour from the midst of history.

This was most memorable because, arriving too late to get a good spot, Bates explained his position like a person who'd inadvertently booked a fortnight in Boppard rather than Cologne. The people you saw down at the Brandenburg Gate were just the sort of people who want to get on TV, revealed Bates, but here - further down the Wall - was where the real Germans were.

It sounds less and less convincing with each passing year, doesn't it?

Downloadable: Popular Damage

What's your damage, Heather? Well, in this case, it's Popular Damage. Mancunian-Berliner pop dance made by XX reshaping duo Nadine Raihani and Stephan Hengst. They sound like this:

Exclusive [Original Mix]

Befriend them on MySpace and damage yourself further.

Pete Doherty arrested. Again.

Pete Doherty is writing a comparative guide to the arrest techniques of European policemen. That's the only possible explanation for his enthusiastic ability to get his collar felt everywhere he goes.

Latest arrest is in Berlin, apparently related to the throwing of a bottle. Of some sort.

He's the Shelley of our age, you know.

MTV goes to Berlin: We're all winners

Congratulations to Placebo, U2, Jay-Z and Beyonce, who won the prizes for bothering to turn up to the MTV Europe awards.

The prizes were handed out in Berlin, and it wasn't lost on anyone that this meant some sort of vague reference to the events of twenty years ago had to be written onto the autocue and read out in a slightly confused voice. Oh, and that Bono thing.

The irony of what MTV did isn't lost on the Guardian:

Twenty years ago, thousands of Germans converged at the Berlin Wall to watch as the hated barrier between east and west was torn down. But tonight, many fans hoping to catch a glimpse of U2 as they played a free concert to celebrate the anniversary of the historic event would have found a small obstacle in their way: a hastily erected wall.

The organisers of the event, the music network MTV, erected a two-metre high "sight barrier" to exclude those without one of 10,000 free tickets from catching a glimpse of the band.

Well done, Bono. Building a divisive wall to celebrate the collapse of a divisive wall. Apparently Nelson Mandela is panicking in case Bono wants to do something to mark his release.

Those people who turned up in full:

Best Video - Beyonce - Single Ladies

Best Live Act - U2

Best Urban Act - Jay-Z

Best Rock - Green Day

Best Song - Beyonce - Halo

Best Alternative - Placebo

Best New Act - Lady GaGa

Best Male - Eminem

Best Female - Beyonce

Best UK & Ireland Act - Pixie Lott

Best European Act - maNga

Best Group - Tokio Hotel

Tokio Hotel are the best group in the world. Tokio Hotel are the best group in the world. Tok... how many times do I have to say this before it starts to stop sounding like a punchline?

Gordon in the morning: Sind sie allein in Berlin?

Last night's MTV awards in Berlin had an element of looking backwards, but most people were only casting backwards twenty years.

Not Gordon, though. Germany, you say?:

Ze vinners are...

Ah, reporting Germany like you're writing a Victor comic strip. Classy. Are The Sun ever going to get over the Second World War?

Berliners call for wall to be rebuilt; West begs to be let into the East

The collapse of the Berlin Wall was a fantastic example of people. Ordinary, brave, pissed-off people taking the law into their own hands.

There is no nothing less appropriate to mark this than several millionaires with no obvious links to the city playing a self-aggrandising gig:

U2 and Jay-Z have played a show at the Brandenburg Gate in Berlin this evening (November 5).

Taking to the stage on the eastern side of the old divide, the band played a short set to mark the 20th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall in 1989, the flashpoint that kick-started Germany's reunification.

Why does Bono singing a Bob Marley song "mark the anniversary"? You might as well fill a milkfloat full of bison poo and drive up it in circles round the Reichstag and say that's marking the occasion.

Thatcher-off: Number four

In case you've missed this so far today, we're attempting a politico-sociological experiment to decide if music was better before or after Thatcher. April 1979 is starting to look pretty good, but we've got four rounds left to play.

Number 4, April 1979: Gloria Gaynor - I Will Survive



Oh, it could be game over for 1990, couldn't it? Sure, this might be the worst music video ever, with its confused use of rollerskating to depict 'freedom' (a conceit later adopted by most early sanitary product commercials) but this is just a cultural cornerstone, isn't it? If the 1979 election was being fought today, Sunny Jim would appear on TV intoning "first, I was afraid, I was petrified..." and romp home.

Number 4, November 1990: Berlin - Take My Breath Away



Between you and me, right: you know that Kelly McGillis, right? Well... let's just say, she wouldn't be interested in Tom Cruise in real life, right. Don't tell anyone, though. It's the best-kept secret in showbiz.

Yes, a decade of Thatcherism, and this is what was passing for anthemic - a big, airy nothing slapped on a movie soundtrack about fighter pilots. Top Gun didn't make the air force sound as much fun as the Village People did the navy, did it?

1979 wins. Again.

Pre-Thatcher: 5; Post-Thatcher - 2.

Drowning in Berlin

Although apparently she rallied later on, Amy Winehouse's Berlin date suggests she's still got more "personal demons" to "bring under control":

From the moment Wino tripped and staggered as she walked on stage, it was clear we would be in for a rollercoaster ride.

The Camden Caner had to stop and start again after stumbling over the opening lines of two numbers – including a cover of ZUTONS hit Valerie.

She also twitched, coughed and rubbed her face awkwardly for the most part of the gig.

This, of course, is from Bizarre, written as if Victoria was in the front row. Apart from the vague "most part of the gig" bit.

Bookmarks: Some other stuff to read on the web

Nanci Griffith is being blocked by George Bush, she tells IC Birmingham:

"I haven't been able to write anything for two years. I have been so angry with my president and the war in Iraq."

Despite her 'fan club' including the legendary Bob Dylan, Nanci is not tempted to pursue the protest song route when it comes to Iraq.

"For me, I have never been the kind of person to write in anger."

David Byrne goes to the Stasi Museum in Berlin:

Maybe the intent was NOT to hide this surveillance gear too well, the idea possibly being to make people aware they were being looked at and listened to. If you’re not aware you’re being observed then you won't live in fear, so what’s the point? Sometimes buildings here in the U.S. put up fake surveillance cameras in the hopes of discouraging perps. Of course, it wasn’t all just nutty surveillance stuff — people’s lives were ruined, destroyed, their careers came to a dead end at the least suspicion, there were prison terms and torture without stated reason (where have I heard that one before?) and information and culture was heavily censored. And the food wasn’t that great, either.

The Guardian meets with Pearl Spam out of Powder, as she publishes her memoirs:

One thing she is most definitely not concerned about is the reaction of her old friends to the book - which, I can assure you, is a surprisingly compulsive read. Celebrities, particularly the celebrities with whom Lowe was hanging around, tend to be very visible in their public lives but keep their private lives protectively closeted. And although Lowe carefully avoids naming individuals - other than listing at one point that her crowd included Kate Moss, Jude Law, Sadie Frost, Liam Gallagher, Jonny Lee Miller and Patsy Kensit - the book does convey just how central drugs were to her gang. "There was a general belief in our world that you couldn't have fun unless you were slightly out of it," she writes. There are anecdotes about group dinners at the Ivy, with Lowe dashing off mid-meal in someone's chauffeured car to go and buy cocaine for the group. "You're my best friend," one gushes when she returns.

Ssssh... Pumpkins

The Smashing Pumpkins, or what's passing for them these days, played a secret gig last night in Berlin. It was so secret, of course, to stop James Iha from turning up and spoiling things.

Billy Corgan then held a question and answer session - which, on one hand, is a lovely way of interacting with your fans, but on the other, does have an air of pompousness doing it after the gig - "I expect some of my songs have left you wanting to ask questions. After all, what better way to round off the night than me telling you how I suffer for my art?"

Corgan told the audience that making Zeitgeist, the new album, was "a long, laborious process to perfection", and we fully believe him. Except the bit about perfection, of course. Somebody asked him about the band sort-of-coming back together:

"When the band broke up in 2000 a lot of people were saying it was a bad idea. But I felt we had to do it. Now we had to come back. We believe in the power of intention and prophecy."

We prophesise the new album will be overblown and have a couple of good ideas stretched to breaking point.

Nothing happens anywhere in the world without someone capturing it for YouTube, of course:

See? He said my face was pretty

So, the long-awaited Jackson riposte film has been shown in the US (Sky One will be finding room for it in the UK), and we'd like to take this opportunity to apologise to Jackson. It turns out we were wrong - he's a great dad, he's in no way insane, and that Martin Bashir is a nasty piece of work no question, guv.

Well, we would like to, but since Jackson hasn't sent us a huge cheque, we're going to stick to the truth. Michael, pet, when Bashir said nice things to you, he was putting you at your ease - do you see? And if you watch the Tonight which you describe as a travesty, it's clear he started off with the intention of presenting you in a positive light, but your behaviour made it impossible.

So you thought Berlin zoo would be closed when you took the kids there? Fair enough. But when it was obvious that it wasn't, why did you parade the little nippers through the midst of that scrum? See, the problem wasn't that the kids were in a dangerous situation, it was your total failure to try and get them out.

Oh, and the woman who bore your kid popped up to say its her who insists on the masks, and that she'd have another child for you like a shot. Well, I'm convinced by that. A caring mother who just doesn't bother to have anything to do with her child's upbringing, yet does insist they and their siblings wear face masks at all time - there's no way that doesn't ring true, is there? "Being the child of Michael Jackson, junior could be in danger. But if he puts a gauze mask on, everything will be fine."

Man misses man biting dog

In an all-time classic of missing the story, South Africa's News24 reports the crowd gathering outside of the Berlin hotel waiting for Michael Jackson to appear. And misses the baby-dangling incident totally.