my latest job performance review

Parenting these two kiddos is my full time job.  For now it is my number one job.  I think someday I will have a work outside the home job again, but for now I am thankful I get to focus on these kiddos.  I get to be here when they get off the bus after school.  I get to be here all summer long.  

With all jobs my job can be hard.  Sometimes I feel like a glorified maid.  Sometimes I feel like a short order cook.  On those weird emotional days the mom guilt creeps into my brain and I just feel awful for moving these two kiddos from Texas to Ohio to Georgia all within a few years.  I know people move all the time, but as a kid I didn't.  I went to the same school my whole grade school career.  Our family lived in several different houses, but all in the same town.   I know I don't have to raise my kids the way I was raised.  BUT I've still felt like we could break our kids by moving them. Guess what...

They are not broken.  They may be better than I was as a kid.  

They are doing wonderful and they are loving it here in Georgia.  

How do I know this?  

Because earlier today Layla stood gazing out the window and she said, "Mom, I love it here.  I love our house and my school and my friends.  I can't wait to help you and dad get our backyard cleaned up and looking better."

She said she liked it here!!!!!

  I can't blame her.  The weather is amazing.  We live in a fun part of town near stores and fun restaurants.  We have huge trees and lakes all around us.  We have a perfect house for our family right now at this stage of our lives.  I think I'm doing ok at my job, with Gary's help of course, and we are guiding these children down the right path.

 I feel a sense of relief that us moving and starting over twice in a few years hasn't broken the children.  It's made them stronger and you know what? It's made me stronger and seeing them grow and learn and face the moving fears has helped me.  I'm learning so much about my adult self through all this.  God knows what he's doing and he knew what he was doing giving me this job of being a mom.  I think I've learned more about myself since having kids.  I'm growing up myself!

two girls learning and growing

It seems like just yesterday I was sitting on the carpeted floor with chubby thighed Layla watching her lay there and kick and coo.  She didn't want to crawl or roll over to her tummy.  Why would she want to do that?  Her momma did everything for her.  If there was a pink plastic toy out of her reach I would just hand it to her.  What was I thinking?

  I think as moms we want to make life easier for our children in the moment.  I wanted to hand her that pink horse rattle or her Ellie the elephant so she didn't have to struggle.  

Clearly, she is fine and me babying her didn't hurt her, but looking back I should have let her do more for herself.  How do you tell a new hard headed mom that?

And just like that, way too fast she turned three.  I still helped her, but then I was half way starting to get it.  I knew she needed to do things on her own to grow and become independent.  In my eyes she was 3 years old for many years.  When she was 4, she was still 3.  When she was 5 she still seemed 3 to me.  When she turned 6 I had an awakening.  She had a little mind of her own, as she always had, but I didn't want her to change.  She was so smart and had the cutest personality. She was reading and learning math facts.  I had to stop babying her and let her grow.  She met friends in kindergarten and wanted to have playdates.  What?  She was still three.  Kids don't do that at that age, I didn't want to let her go and grow.  But she was 6 and very social and super cute.  She needed that! 

No one tells you that about parenting.  I wish someone would shake me sometimes and MAKE me stop what I'm doing and look down into my life as if I'm looking into a snow globe.   You know what?  Now she isn't 3 or 6, she is 9!  How in the world is she 9 years old?  And she'll be 10 in July.  I read in a beauty pageant packet advertisement that was mailed to our home that 10 years old is considered pre-teen. 

 Excuse me?

She's washing her own hair.  She's painting her own nails even if it looks all crazy.  She can scramble eggs and make a mean bowl of mac n cheese.  I have to step away from my perfectionist mind set and let her become the amazing little girl she is ment to be. Gary and I had to let her fall off her bike to learn to ride it.  I now have to let her try to blow dry her hair even when she gets mad and begs me to do it for her.  "Please mom, you do it better.  I don't know how!!"  I can remind her to wash her face and brush her hair, but she has to do it.  I have to be quiet during homework so she can solve the problems on her own without me doing it for her.  She gets mad at me when I make her do her own stuff sometimes.  I get that awful mommy guilt that us moms feel when we least expect it.  I know deep down she isn't 3 anymore and I must let her grow and make mistakes.  After all, isn't that how we learn the best lessons?  

All this to say,  I have learned so much through having Layla and Hayden . A little girl and a little boy, each one growing and learning their own way.  No one tells you how to parent or what you'll feel.  I'm learning how to stop and step back to make sure I'm helping and letting their brains make decisions and choices that in the end help them grab their dreams and run with them. 

What have you learned about yourself after becoming a parent?

you do what you do and they do what they do

As the mom of two beautiful kids I have learned to not compare kids.  It was not easy and sometimes I slip up, but for my sanity it had to stop.  I try not to compare my kids to each other and I try not to compare my kids to other kids.  

My kids are completely different.  

For example: Layla was a great baby.  She was easy to sleep train, she was an early talker but physically she was lazy.  Hayden was a cry baby.  He cried for the first 6 months of his life.  When he wasn't sleeping, which he actually loved to do, he was crying.  He hardly ever said a word but lifted his head up 2 days after we brought him home from the hospital.  

He was completely different than his sister.  

Another example:  Layla drank formula until she was 12 months old.  Hayden hated formula and was drinking regular milk and eating solids at 6 months old.  He stopped crying all the time when he got 'real' food.

Why am I telling you this?  

As a mom of 2 kids, ages 6 and 3, I have learned you can't compare the two children.  I think it is human nature to compare kids.  

I also think it is human nature to compare moms to each other and to other moms....

Why don't I look like her?  Why is her house so clean?  Why does she drive that car?  Why do her kids sleep and mine don't? 

Why are we wasting the effort comparing ourselves to one another?  

We are who we are and God has us in this stage of life for a reason.  There will be lows and highs.  We all need to realize that.  I have let go of so much stress simply by NOT comparing myself to another mother or person.

It is hard for some of us to see the neighbor down the street that has a 4000 square foot home.  If we aren't in the same financial status as them, do we want the mortgage they pay?  Just because their house looks nice and big doesn't mean their life is any better.  Just because they have a Lexus parked in the driveway doesn't mean they are rich.  They may be struggling to pay for that gorgeous car and their marriage may be suffering because the husband is always at work to pay for that car.

Source: stumbleupon.com via Angie on Pinterest

We shouldn't compare our lives to the lives of someone else.  We just don't know what is going on inside their lives.  Let's focus on ourselves!

I think being confident in who we are and what we are doing comes with age.  

As a brand new mom I spent time when Layla was really little comparing her to another baby boy her age.  I didn't know any better.  I thought she should be doing the same things HE was doing.  Today both kids are great.  They are excelling in school and I feel silly thinking back to the wasted time I spent worrying about her development.  I totally stressed myself out worrying about why she wasn't walking when he was.  Those days of worry could have been days no stress, but I was wearing myself out with worry.

All this said for a reason... 

Source: fashionetal.blogspot.com via tasha on Pinterest

I have learned to focus on my family.  The four people in my house need my attention.  I need to be stress free and worry free so I can focus on our family.  I don't need to be worrying about things beyond my control.  I try not to worry about things that aren't my business.  When I am weak I say a prayer.  I pray that God reminds me to live in the moment and understand this is all happening for a reason and soon my "now" will be tomorrow. Life goes my so fast.  Be happy!


Andddd I am stepping down from my soap box now.

Source: etsy.com via Angie on Pinterest

Have a great Monday!

My ear, Private Practice, nail polish, a GPS & a simple thank you!

Whew...I am a little out of breath after that title.


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I just got home from seeing my ear/nose/throat doctor.  I had a hearing test that still shows a bit of hearing loss.  I also told the doctor about the clicking I still hear.  All of these things should get better with time.  The clicking is a muscle spasm in my ear?!?  Kind of like when the eye twitches.  The hearing loss is very minimal.  My doctor doesn't really think these things are super worrisome.  I sometimes think that being in tune with my body can work against me.  I notice every little change in my body and I think it can be good and bad at times. So... we wait. I guess we will see if my ear gets better.  Honestly, this has been a huge pain in my behind, but I am thankful the situation isn't worse.


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I need to purchase a book about raising boys.  Hayden is a little wild man right now.  He is testing boundaries like never before.  It is a challenge to keep up with him.  When I stress out about things I do not understand, I like to read and research.  I feel the need to read right now. Anybody else this way?  Do you feel as though you need to fill your brain with insight?  If you can recommend good parenting books or parenting a boy books let me know.  Once I finish typing this post I am headed to amazon.com for inspiration.

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I am so excited about the upcoming week.  When Layla gets out of school today she is out for a week!  I love Thanksgiving.  I love the holiday's with my family.  I can't wait to put up our Christmas tree next weekend.  YES....I am one of THOSE people.

I don't Ho Ho Ho until I Gobble Gobble!
{isn't that the cutest saying?!?  i heard it on twitter last week and i totally just stole it}


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For those of you that email and tweeted and called me wishing me luck at my big Thirty-One event last night...thanks!  It went great!  I met tons of people and made lots of contacts.  Thank you for your support in helping me get this fun business going!  I am so blessed.


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Did any of you watch Private Practice last night? Wow wee!  It was so intense.  I love that show!  Do you think Addison is pregnant this time.  Do you like her and Sam together?  Do you think Amelia will stay sober?  Did the whole Pete and Violet drama break your heart?  So many questions!  I feel like the kid on Home Alone when the man is loading the van...remember him asking ALL those questions?!


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Sooooo, here's my 2 cents on nail polish.

 Thanks to my friend Jessica and our very in depth conversation about cheap vs. expensive polishes....I have come to the conclusion that the base and top coat are all that matter.  I painted my nails with a new Sally Hansen base/top coat all in one.  My polish has stayed on much longer.  YAY!  I am thrilled and I know you have been waiting your whole life to hear this earth shattering news! har har.  The moral of the story...get a good base/top coat.  The one I bought was only $7.00 and it is in a silver squarish bottle.


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I want to make Chex mix and so many other fun things.  Our grocery bill is just going to be insane.  I just can't help myself.  I also want to make chocolate covered almonds.  I made rice crispy treats last week and they were gone in two days. I kid you not.


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I don't want my kids to rely on GPS's when they are teenagers or adults.  When I am going somewhere and I don't know where I am going I usually print a map or read/study a map online before I leave.  If I get lost while driving I'll stop and put the address into my iPhone.  The thought of my kids leaving our house with an address plugged into a GPS scares me to death.  In my opinion they need to know where they are going.  They need to be aware of their surroundings.  I have lived in several cities in my life.  A few of those are...Fort Worth, Arlington, Tyler and Waco, all in Texas.  I have also lived right outside of Ann Arbor, Michigan and I worked for several months in Minneapolis.  I didn't have a GPS.  I figured it out and conquered every single city I lived in.  I want my kids to learn the roads and really understand where they are going.  What do you think about this?  Do you rely on a GPS in your automobile?


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I don't say it often enough, but thank you all for reading....Thank you so much!

Have a great weekend!

my kids have taught me a few things

As the mom of 2 kids a 6 year old girl  and a 3 year old boy I thought I'd share a few things I have learned since becoming a parent:

1.  Kids have boogers and they cough.  We should own the company Kleenex. 

2.  Never say "My kids will never do that."  As soon as you say it they will do it! Trust me!

3.  Puke is so gross until it is your own kid throwing up and then all you want to do is help them even if it means you may get some on you.

4. Kids will do as you do, not as you say.  They watch, listen and learn from you, the parent.

5.  No two kids are alike.  Don't even try to compare kids.  When I see moms do this it breaks my heart.  Yes, I was once that mom, now I realize comparing does NO good.

6.  Sometimes kids eat and sometimes they don't.  If my kids miss I meal I have learned to NOT freak out about it.

7.  If one kid gets something the other needs the exact same thing or they WILL fight.

8.  Kids have their own opinion about EVERYTHING.  And they should.  Sometimes it is exhausting, but I have learned to let things go.

9.  All privacy is gone. I can't remember the last time I went potty alone.  And if it wasn't a kid in the bathroom one of the dogs found their way in.

10.  My heart is so full and over flowing with love.  I never knew I could love my kids this much.

Yes, even from afar on the soccer field she says,  "NO more pictures mom."

I love them even when they won't smile for the camera, when they are covered in oatmeal, wearing a fleece jacket and a life jacket with no water in sight. Sigh.

I know I have so much more to learn!  

Bring it :)