So, I gave the 'talk'

It was basically about my transition to America(college really), as an African student. I didn't do the Nigerian culture ish and decided to present this sort of talk at the last min, actually 4 hrs before. Believe me, there was more to say.
This is not the exact version cos I added and omitted some stuff, while I talked. I wish I did better tho.

read the sketch below------------------------

**Speak some Yoruba…**

I just spoke an adage meaning (**insert here**) in a language that is not called Nigerian. And definitely not called African. It’s Yoruba.

I remember my 'Coming to America' like the last meal that I just ate. Every time I felt the plane descending, I thought the pilot was about to announce landing. I was anxious to step on the land that supposedly flows with milk, Mariah Careys, skyscrapers and honey. I was eager to touch the American soil. Yet, I arrived at the smaller-than-expected airport and came straight to the **insert school name here** bubble in a town in the middle of nowhere....otherwise known as amazing ***insert town here***

As a freshman, who had only seen the campus online, the college's beautiful, yet confusing, layout impressed me. I don’t have to emphasize how excited I was about the dryers until they shrunk my clothes or the way the butt-wetting automatic flush toilets in **campus center*** welcomed me. But the number of ‘how are u doing?s’, that I got per day was uncountable.

My presence in gatherings did not arouse any peculiar interest, besides my name badge with an 11-letter word, **guess unusual Yoruba name**. I had to explain the meaning and origin of my name, which actually means a full sentence, God surrounds me. Then, teach folks how to pronounce my name with the right intonation, until I gave up and accepted the anglo-phonetized version. In the process, I get the ‘You have an accent’, I tell folks that my accent is Nigerian. Then, the ‘Oh! You are African, what’s is that fluffy snack eaten in Angola?’ or ‘You speak English so well’ pops up.

Initially, I explained that because I am Nigerian, I am not meant to know stuff about other African countries like what people eat in Somali or smoke in Burkina Faso because Africa is some huge continent, bigger than Europe. I'm Nigerian, and I only speak one out of the 250 + languages we speak in Nigeria and English, which is my primary language. I have told people times without number that even though, I am considered an alien, visa-wise in the US, I have been speaking English all my life.

Overtime, I eventually ran out of patience for having to give what seemed like endless explanations. I became nettled and wondered why some people had a single story about Africa. The type of Africa depicted on TV, the primary source of global information. The Africa that has nothing worth publicizing other than starving children, endless wars, roaming lions and funny-sounding languages. But after spending sometime, I realized it is the single story, according to Chimamanda Adichie, that most of us have in mind that gives us a picture of a group of people. Unfortunately, this is true for africa. for me, it is not merely a single...." it is not merely a single story for a group of people from a country but a continent. It is not my fault that I initially thought going to New York guaranteed my seeing a celebrity. It is not my fault that I didn’t know the lower economic class also existed in America.

Whose fault is it? The informant, who omitted some information and repeated the preferred information that gives a false image. Or the informed, who fails to inquire?

Nonetheless, It's been a year and I'm still going strong. The American experience has been thoroughly entertaining. The cold during the winter is definitely incredible; I still look forward to shoving through the snow, touching it and checking the weather every 12 hrs. I still try to be politically correct, by **school's** standards, when I communicate with people. Don't forget that my mind is colonized by the British? Yet, I dwell in the African realm. I look forward to where my name is pronounced with the right intonation, when I can wear my regular trousers and take a siesta on the verandah in December.

I have left my beloved Nigeria for 18 months now. Yet, I think of ***school's name**, as aggressive, eclectic, motivating but I am amazed at how she wraps you in her energy, sexiness, openness and fun spitting expletives at all irrespective of color, gender and musical preference, a feature, sadly missing in many other places that I've been. ***words of F-Iyanda***

I’m glad that I came.

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Je t'embarrase

Accent....{self - case study}

IMO, your accent contributes to your identity more than it does to any other thing/virtue.

Fact:

• I have a Nigerian accent, not the 'concentrated' type that can be associated with a particular tribe but the bland 'Abuja-bred' type.

When I'm not in Nigeria, I have been confronted with the "I like your accent." statement
and I reply with the "It's Nigerian" line.
Sometimes, people ask "Where are you from? You have an accent", once I speak.
I reply, "I'm Nigerian. You have an accent too. Where are you from?"

My last response is only used to make someone aware that not because I don't speak like you means I have a strange accent. It seems the word, accent, now means a different way of speaking. Everyone has an accent, simply a manner of pronunciation. If I am to choose, I do not want adulterate my Nigerian accent and give in to the supposed American 'easy-on-the-ears' way of speaking.

When I went home, ie Budapest, last week, I was booking a cab, with an agency in the USA, via phone and my folks told me that I was using an American accent. Just in one year! I knew it was not American cos even some Americans do not understand me at first hearing, when I speak unconsciously with my Nigerian accent. My folks probably meant my way of speaking had changed.

After taking a self-check, I have come to the conclusion that when I'm communicating with non-Nigerian folks, I speak differently, consciously, dropping the Nigerian non-English phonetic sounds, and pronounce all words plainly. For instance, if you call my office phone, I will talk to you with a very plain English accent but I blow pidgin with my Nigerian accent, when on my mobile.

That plain accent has been labeled "American" by my Nigerian folks and "British" by some Americans. If I am to choose any top five preferred accents to have, the American accent will not even be included. I am far from interested in the American or some European country's accent.

This accent thing can become a 'phonetic war'. For example, when I speak French, I debate using the plain accent or Nigerian.

I just want to be understood faster.