Gordon in the morning: A sudden moment of clarity

Bad news for the cleaners at Wapping; it sounds like there might be a lot of eye-scales to clear up around Gordon's desk this morning:

Allen is just a Lil bit predictable

LILY Allen flouts ban on smoking, boasts about getting drunk & swears like trooper at T In Park

To be fair to Lily, though, there isn't any real indication why the latest swearing and drinking and smoking is "predictable" and dull, rather than getting Gordon to stand on his hindlegs applauding this behaviour. Isn't this sort of thing usually given the pubescent "caner of the year" award?

Elsewhere, the not-actually-surprising news that Duncan James from Blue likes boys as well as girls seems to surprise Gordon:

FANS were reeling yesterday after pop heart-throb DUNCAN JAMES admitted: "I'm bisexual."

Actually, that is surprising - Blue still have fans?

Why, though, does Gordon insist that your sexuality is something you "admit", like a murder or illegal phone-tapping? Perhaps James could have come out earlier if the tabloids didn't treat love like it was seedy.

T In The Park: TV On The Radio on the slide?

After Pete Doherty played the King Tuts tent at T in the Park, on came TV on the Radio. About half the audience made their excuses and left, which I think tells us something a bit grim about festival audiences.

T in the Park: Blur might not turn up

NME is reporting that Blur might not turn up for their T in The Park headline slot tonight:

Festival chief Geoff Ellis made the announcement on the Main Stage at the Scottish festival this afternoon. He explained that guitarist Graham Coxon was in hospital and that the situation was being monitored.

They've rejigged the line-up a little; Snow Patrol will go on an hour later than planned in the hope that Graham Coxon will be back in time for a slightly later start.

Otherwise: can you imagine hoping for a Blur set, and having to make do with Snow Patrol instead?

T in The Park sells out

Want to go to T in the Park? Too late, if you intend to spend your nights there: camping tickets have sold out.

T in The Park: Like Oxegen, but slightly different

Hey, if the idea if Kings Of Leon and Snow Patrol headlining Oxegen wasn't exciting enough, the announcement of headliners for T In The Park is going to make you wear out your caps-shift and 1 keys.

Yes, it's Snow Patrol and Kings Of Leon!!!!!!

Along with Katy Perry.

The festival's boss Geoff Ellis revealed the names to the Daily Record, in response to internet rumours about the line-up.

"We're delighted. Kings Of Leon are the hottest property at the moment. We're ecstatic at having locked them in. Snow Patrol are Scotland's biggest band at the moment," Ellis told the newspaper.

The Kings Of Leon are the hottest property right now - it's so true, especially if you don't think about any of the other bands a bit like them who sell more records. And it's lucky that despite being so hot, they've got plenty of time available in their diaries to play seemingly every field in the nation.

It's all SO BLOODY BRILLIANT.

[This post sponsored by Concerned Citizens For A Less Cynical No Rock And Roll Fun]