Gordon in the morning: Coldplay under the influence

Coldplay held a press conference yesterday to launch their new album Fido Dido, and Gordon went along. That it was in Madrid might have added to the allure.

One of the big surprises was that Brian Eno tried hypnotising the band during the recording sessions:

Bass player Guy Berryman admitted yesterday that the band have reached a stage where they are open to outrageous ideas from the talented team around them to tap into new writing veins.

I'd have thought that was an admission they've more or less run out of steam, isn't it? "What can we do? How about if we dress up in wetsuits and stare at photos of kittens to see if that creates an idea?"

"Brian suggested we try playing together when we were hypnotised. One of his friends came down and we tried it out. Nothing came of it but at least we tried it."

I'm suprised none of the hypnosis tracks are on the record, because when I listen to it, I do find I feel sleepy, sleepy, very sleepy.

Meanwhile, Chris Martin was fuming at the idea that people think Coldplay little more than a reworking of other people's ideas:

He also hammered any suggestion that the band would ever copy other people's music.

He said: "It's fine not to like our band, but making up shit about us is not on. There's a difference between criticism and accusation. People who accuse us of stuff like that are *****, quite frankly."

I'm guessing that's going to be "cunts" - partly because it's clearly such a shocking word Gordon couldn't bring himself to even print the first letter, and partly because having been lazily homophobic and misusing disability language over the last couple of days, he's probably going for the clumsy sexist insult to get the treble.

Still, it's interesting that Chris gets so angry about people who accuse them of copying other bands. So much as to call them *****.

One of the biggest *****s would be, erm, Chris Martin who told Rolling Stone in 2005:

"We’re definitely good, but I don’t think you can say we’re that original,” he notes. “I regard us as being incredibly good plagiarists.”

He might also want to have a word with his bandmate Jonny Buckland, who admitted ripping off Kraftwerk:

"We've never so directly stolen off anyone before. We've never paid for our plagiarism."

What a *****.

Mind you, at the same time, Martin also chimed in with this:

"Fix You came directly from Elbow's Grace Under Pressure."

Hold up there, Chris: don't you know that there's a difference between admiration and plagiarism?

Gordon in the morning: Coldplay... do a nice thing, actually

Coldplay. They're meant to be evil. It makes it hard to remember this when they do something nice:

COLDPLAY have emerged as unlikely sponsors for small Gloucestershire village cricket side Slaughters Utd.

Bass player GUY BERRYMAN has offered to fork out for new whites and kit for the club.

Cricket, you say? Why, Gordon, can you think of a crickety pun?

HOWZAT for generosity?

Of course you can. And "delighted insider" at the Great Rissington cricket club, can you come up with one? (In other words, can you think of another, Gordon?)

A delighted insider at the club said: "It's knocked us for six."

Well done, every one.

Coldplay bloke splits from his wife

Guy Berryman and his wife Joanna Briston have split. The couple, whose first child was born six months ago, had their break-up confirmed by a Coldplay spokesperson:

, "I can confirm that Guy Berryman and his wife Jo have separated. The decision was amicable."

"The decision was amicable" never seems believable when they're talking about a band breaking up; it's hard to imagine a marriage ending with a shrug.