Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts

Thursday, September 25, 2014

Birthdays Aren't So Bad...

This has been a simply fab birthday, so far!

I'm not much for birthdays, really; the older I get...well, I actually had to do the math today to double check how old I am today and to my pleasure discovered I'm a year younger than I thought.

That was good news.

Anyway.

Since there's no rule about NOT having to work on your birthday, I went to work.  I'm having a good semester and my kids are working hard, doing everything I ask of them, and doing it without complaint.  What more can I ask?

When my first block found out it was my birthday today they were at first a little irritated that I hadn't told them; as we transitioned into our last activity of the morning I noticed Timmothy was out of his seat and walking around to other groups with his paper in hand.  Ever diligent, I directed him to sit back down and he complied.  Then (head-smack!) I figured out what he was up to.



They'd made me a card!

My heart melted.  And Timmothy forgot to sign it!  So he made me a bookmark that noted "This was Timmothy's idea!" and he drew a picture of a Jolly Rancher.    Well, I just love it.

My daughter sent me these gorgeous flowers:



And my 22-year old son, for the first time ever, went out to a store and bought me a gift and two cards (one from the cats!).



I cried.

Steve and I will go out to dinner tomorrow with friends and so the festivities will continue for another day.  I'm looking forward to that!

Birthdays aren't so bad, really!

Saturday, November 23, 2013

It Looks Like Gross Candied Fruit to You But It's Much More Than That

Can we please, please just skip over to January?
To you, this looks like a bunch of gross candied fruit.  To me, it's 45 years worth of memories of holiday memories with my mother.  To me, it represents hours sitting together chopping the sticky fruit into small pieces for fruitcake cookies.  To me, it's the days we spent in the warm kitchen baking pan after pan of cookies to have and share for the Christmas holidays.  To me, it's the day my godmother came into that kitchen for coffee one morning, and when she came back eight hours later for a "bee-yah" (beer, to most of us), we were still baking in hysterical laughter.

Two weeks ago when my local supermarket set up their Christmas baking aisle and I saw this fruit sitting there, my heart lurched and I had to catch my breath.  "Holy crap, where did that come from?" I thought.  I walked faster and brushed the tears out of my eyes, feeling like a plum idiot for bawling in the grocery store.

For the past several weeks, ever since the holiday commercials have starting running on t.v., I've been dreading Christmas.

I just can't do it.

I don't even know....I seriously don't think....I can even put up a tree.

When my dad died some twenty years ago, putting up the tree was therapeutic.  He went into the hospital right after Thanksgiving that year and died January 3.  It was an awful Christmas.  But working on the tree was an escape for me; hanging those damn icicles one by one on the tree took days.  And when it was finished, I'd sit in the dark living room with a glass of Crown Royal and gaze at the tree long into the night, praying he would not suffer and trying to figure out how in the world we would manage without him.  The tree was comforting.

This year there is just no reason.  My children are grown.  For multiple reasons, the annual Christmas gathering here won't happen.  Nobody is going to come this year; mom is gone.  She died in March.  I'd been at her side, daily for seven years taking care of her as she declined.  We were together every single day.  I was the one sibling who was here, who lived close by, who cancelled vacations, who put her own life on hold to take care of mom for seven years.  How can I possibly do Christmas without her?  Why bother with a tree?

I might put up some decorations.  I probably will.

But all those commercials with big happy families and sappy Christmas movies?  Screw it.  I'm not doing it this year.  It hurts too much.

But the fruitcake cookies?  That's my one small way to fight back.  I'm going to make the damn cookies.  I'll cry all the way through it, but I'll do it.  I'll make mom's fudge recipe, too, because there are still people I love who love to get my little Christmas care package each year.  Billy, Mary, Hattie: they'll be missing mom this year too, and I'll share a little bit of her with them in each fruitcake cookie and each piece of fudge I make.

But really, I'd rather just skip to January.  I'm totally not ready for this.

Monday, May 6, 2013

Take a Trip Along East Texas Back Roads

East Texas has the most spectacular wildflowers this time of year!

Steve and I headed over to Frisco, Texas this weekend where my daughter and her husband have just moved into their new house.  

Confession time:  If there is really a phobia about being in heavy traffic then I've got it.  I was in a car accident years ago (probably 15 years ago!) where a lady ran a stop sign onto a busy highway and I just T-boned her.  It was totally unavoidable on my part, and ever since then I've been totally phobic about riding as a passenger in heavy traffic.  It doesn't seem as bad if I'm doing the driving but I still avoid heavy traffic.

Anyway, before my daughter and her husband moved to Frisco, Steve and I had our route to their house in Garland figured out so that I didn't come too unglued.  When they moved to Frisco, we studied the maps and figured out I'd have to ride on the back floor board if we were to get there without me coming unglued! 

But lo and behold, we figured out a back-roads way to get there and I was happy as a clam.  (Are clams really happy?  Where did that expression come from?)  

We love the back roads anyway and seldom take major highways when we go on all these little day trips.  We prefer the scenery on the back roads.  



At any rate, we took I-20 to Tyler (which isn't bad and doesn't scare me once we get out of town) and then turned off on Highway 69 through Lindale, Mineola and a host of other tiny towns.  Then we took 380 west to Frisco - easy as could be!

Back to the wildflowers.  Texas is known for the bluebonnets and they are already blooming along the roadsides but I fell in love with the Huisache daisy!  They were stunning!  


Steve loved the orange Indian Paintbrushes.  


Now contrary to public opinion, it is not illegal to pick the wildflowers, but most people, out of consideration and common sense, do not.  There is a law against trespassing, of course, and against digging up clumps of flowers.

After stopping to admire the flowers alongside I-20 we made our way to Lindale.  The town's current claim to fame seems to be that it's the hometown of country star Miranda Lambert.    Miss Lambert has a store there and her wine label, Red 55, is sold in a store on the main drag through town.  We stopped in and looked around, but not being Miranda fans per se, or wine fans exactly, we were out of our element.  It is, apparently, a very popular stop though.

We were hungry so we looked for a local place with lots of cars.  We stopped at Petty's Steak and Catfish on Main Street.  


I like the kind of place that when you walk in people stop and look up from their plates to see who is coming in.  That means they're regulars, they eat there often, and they all know each other.  Locals.  That's a good sign.  

I ordered the chicken fried steak (what in the world else would you order in Texas for crying out loud!?) and it was wonderful.



Steve went for the chopped sirloin.  We both had okra and tomatoes.  Without sounding too much like Robert Irvine, let me just say that everything on the plate was fresh, not canned, and perfectly seasoned.  We met the owner's mom in the parking lot outside as she was coming in.  We visited for a few minutes and she shared some of her recipe secrets with us, especially dessert recipes!  

Petty's is a great place to eat and even if you don't go the back roads like we do, it's not far off the interstate and well worth the detour.  It's much better than the greasy hamburger chains along the way.

Not far at all from Lindale was Mineola.  Call me sheltered, but I never knew about this little east Texas treasure.  I'll definitely be back in Mineola! (Click on the photo to enlarge).



On this particular stop they were having their May Days carnival in the historic downtown area.



There was a fun house for the kids:


Carnival games:


And I almost came home with Daisy:


What a sweet, precious puppy she is!  I hope she found a good, forever home Saturday.  It broke my heart to have to leave her behind.

But the main reason I'll head back to Mineola is that there is an antique shop everywhere you turn.


We had to move quickly because we really needed to get on to Frisco, but we did run into this huge antique barn:


Inside, you could buy a nifty camera:


Or stock your vintage kitchen:


There's a little railroad museum there that I'd like to visit.  Steve had his picture made as Mr. Conductor:


But here is the museum (or part of it):


Mineola has plenty of quaint, historic buildings in the downtown area:


The Beckham Hotel is now a private residence and I'm fascinated with it.  Apparently this fellow bought it, tried to restore it and put it back into service, then abandoned the idea when he realized he was "a poor host" and that nobody wanted to stay in "an old antique hotel."  (I do!).  Read the story here.

I'd love to see the inside.

Another great building is the old Henry Hotel:


It houses a coffee house now but you can still see the advertising on the side of the building:


And the entrance:


We finally got to Frisco, found the new house, and spent the rest of the afternoon with my daughter, her husband, and our grandson who turns one year old on July 4.  I'd show you his picture but his parents are very private and would prefer he not be plastered all over the internet; I totally respect that.  Suffice to say that he's the cutest, most adorable little fella in Texas!

My daughter and I headed into Dallas to see Wicked, which I'd never seen.  I was blown away; I totally loved it!  One of my favorite songs from the production is here (no embed!).  I bought a Wicked t-shirt!  Love it!  We had wicked good seats, too!


It was a grand affair, to be sure!  After breakfast and more visiting Sunday morning, we left a little early because the happy homeowners still had plenty of unpacking and settling in to do.  They'll be working at that for a while!

On our way home on Sunday Steve and I stopped in Mineola and ate at the East Texas Burger Company downtown.  


It was very good.  Next time I'm going to try one of the fried pies!

We also stopped at a roadside plant and vegetable stand right outside of Alba, Texas:  Pickett's Plants and Produce. 


We met a real friendly proprietor and his grandson and bought some flowers and veggies.



The flowers were gorgeous and I bought some pretty yellow perennials:



We finally made our way back to Shreveport, unloaded the car, and put one more road trip in the books.

I'm thrilled with my back roads route to Frisco, and look forward to doing it again soon.  We have yet another route we've yet to try as well, so who knows, maybe next time we will try that one!

East Texas is just lovely and I'm a pure sucker for quaint little towns.  We did not meet one, single unfriendly soul all along the way.  People stopped to talk to you, to visit like you were an old, long lost friend.  

And you know what everyone is talking about?


I'm not kidding.  When they find out you're from Louisiana, they want to know if you know "the Duck Dynasty people."  

Maybe we need to take a road trip to West Monroe next time!

The SIGIS Take a Trip Series:
Take a Trip to the 2012 Defenders of Liberty Air Show at BAFB
Take a Springtime Trip to Second Hand Rose Antiques in Minden, LA
Take a Trip to Logansport, Louisiana
Take a Trip to the Lock and Dam on Red River
Take a Trip to the 2012 Barkus and Meoux Parade
Take a Christmas Shopping Trip to Second Hand Rose in Minden
Take a Trip to the Fourth Annual Barksdale AFB Oktoberfest 
Take a Trip to Grand Cane's Fifth Annual Pioneer Trade Day
Take a Trip to the 2011 Highland Jazz & Blues Festival
Take an Autumn Trip to Jefferson, Texas
Take a Fall Trip to Second Hand Rose Antiques in Minden
Take a Trip to the 8th Air Force Museum at Barksdale Air Force Base
Take a Summertime Trip to Grand Cane
Take a Trip to Desoto Parish
Take a Summer Trip to Second Hand Rose Antiques in Minden
Take a Trip to Natchitoches and Melrose Plantation 
Take a Trip to Ed Lester Farms and a Random Antique Stop
Take a Trip to the Norton Art Gallery and the Masters of Cuban Art Exhibit
Take a Trip to Natchitoches to See the Christmas Lights
Take a Trip to the Third Annual BAFB Oktoberfest 
Take a Trip to Natchitoches and Oakland Plantation
Take a Trip to Jefferson, Texas
Oktoberfest at BAFB

Saturday, March 23, 2013

On the Passing of My Mother

I have written a great deal in this space about my mother through the five or so years of this blog but now mom and I have ended a long journey together.  I got the call Tuesday morning that she had moved on without me.

Mom died in her sleep during the night.

It's sad for those of us that loved her but she was more than ready, was totally at peace with it, and  was looking forward to seeing my father, her parents and her good friends.  And I know she isn't suffering anymore.

She was frustrated in later years by neuropathy that robbed her of feeling in her hands, by hearing loss, and eventually by diminishing eyesight.

It's difficult, of course, because I've spent the last eight years or so taking care of her needs.  It will take some time to get used to not going by every day to check on her.

It will be okay, though.  She and I spent a lot of time talking about this; she wanted to be sure I was ready and so she had everything organized and lined out ages ago.  I've even found a little notebook where she wrote down every little piece of cut crystal or vase, every wedding gift and piece of silver, every piece of furniture, jewelry, and every item of importance to her in her house; she wrote down where it came from, who gave it to her, or from whom it was inherited.  She wrote down which child she wants to have it after she's gone.

In that notebook she also left me a list of things to do:  "Call the Social Security office so they don't send anymore checks!"  "Get plenty of death certificates!  EVERYone needs one!"

She had been through this with her parents and was trying to make it easy for me.

I still bungled things though.  I did the obituary for the paper but I should have done it ahead of time rather than after they called me.  I left out a couple of things, like that she was a graduate of Centenary College and a Chi Omega.  She was proud of that.

She'll forgive me for that, though.

I'm going to copy/paste the obit here because eventually it will fall off the internet and The Times won't have it available anymore:

Mary Earle Texada Phillips
Shreveport, LA - Mrs. Mary Earle Phillips passed away on Tuesday, March 19, 2013. A graveside service will begin at 1:00 p.m. on Friday, March 22, at Forest Park Cemetery, St. Vincent Ave. Officiating will be The Rev. Paul Martin, Rector of St. Paul's Episcopal Church. 
Mrs. Phillips was a native of Coushatta, LA and a resident of Shreveport, LA for most of her life. She was a member of St. Paul's Episcopal Church and a graduate of C. E. Byrd High School. 
Mrs. Phillips was preceded in death by her parents, Florence and John Pintard Texada; her husband, William H. Phillips, Jr.; and granddaughter, Melissa Renee Phillips. She is survived by her daughters, Mary Margaret Grayson and husband, Gordon and Patricia P. Becker and husband, Steve; son, William Hutch Phillips and wife, Laura; grandchildren, Mary Francis Archer, Patricia Nicole Sumrow and John P. Austin; and great-grandchildren, Alex Archer and Benjamin Sumrow 
The family requests that memorials be made to the Byrd High School Alumni Association.
The family would like to express their sincere appreciation the The Glen and Harmony Life for their compassionate care. 

It's amazing the acts of kindness that occur when something like this happens.  Mom just wanted a simple graveside service; that's been the custom in our family for as long as I can remember.  I took care of the arrangements, got it all set up, and then got a message from a wonderful friend who asked if I'd like him to play something at mom's service.  Of course I hadn't thought about anything like that.  So he asked me what mom liked.

"Well, she really liked Frank Sinatra, but...", and he laughed.

"I'll tell you what," he said.  "I can do 'What a Wonderful World' by Louis Armstrong.  How would that be?"

Perfect!  Mom loved that.  I just couldn't have planned it better.

Bill Allen will never know what a wonderful gesture that was and how much it meant to me.

I have a strong support system, a great husband, and good friends, so I'll be okay.

It'll take some time, but I'll be okay.  Mom would insist on it!

Monday, December 24, 2012

Having a Merry Christmas and Dodging Germs

Merry Christmas!

Mr. SIGIS and I are all settled in for the evening and are awaiting the 24 hour marathon of  A Christmas Story.

I've got a turkey breast soaking in brine for tomorrow's dinner and the breakfast casserole is sitting in the fridge ready to go in the oven.

We did our family Christmas this past Saturday; my daughter and her husband drove over from Dallas with the new baby and we had a small gathering at my house.  Much smaller compared to last year's big shindig, but some of the family opted to stay in Dallas this year.  I boxed up their gifts and got them in the mail in time to arrive for Christmas.

I can't see my mom because her wing at The Glen is on quarantine due to a stomach virus outbreak.  It's hard not seeing her on Christmas but at least she got to see her great grandson before the outbreak!  Hopefully that will all clear up soon and I can get in to see her.



My college student is sick, too.  He came down with a flu-like virus that has him feeling like crud; we spent the morning at the doctor's office and he's now on bed rest.

I've invited my brother over for Christmas tomorrow; he couldn't attend our gathering Saturday because HE was sick!

Mr. SIGIS and I are washing our hands a lot, taking lots of vitamins.  We are hoping none of this crud hits us.

Meanwhile, here's hoping you are all having a wonderful Christmas with family and friends!

Here's a cute video I found on Facebook - for the dog lovers:



Merry Christmas!

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Happy Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving.

The start of the holiday season.  It comes with mixed feelings around here; I love the holidays but it's always sort of bittersweet, you know?  There are the memories of holidays past (both good and bad!) and inevitably things change. 

In our family we used to all gather at my mother's house...well, actually, at my grandmother's house before that.  Then, when Thanksgiving dinner got to be too much for my grandmother, we did it at mom's house.  We've always been a small family but mom always pulled out the sterling flatware and serving pieces, a white, starched tablecloth, candles, the whole nine yards. 

My grandfather would always bring a bottle of port.  The men folks watched football and when it was time, dad would carve the turkey with the electric knife (that's the only time of year we ever used the thing.) 

As a kid I always some little job or task to keep me occupied - something like filling the salt and pepper shakers or preparing the relish tray (celery, sweet gherkins, cocktail onions, olives). 

The extended family would come in from Dallas, and often after dinner family friends might drop by.  We ate around 1:00 and after dinner the women always lingered around the table over coffee and pecan pie while the men adjourned to the den for football. 

Almost always some crazy family foible would occur, like the time my grandfather went for a walk after dinner and got lost; he went to the wrong house.  We all were in a panic looking for him.  It was funny later, but not at the time.

Anyway, in more recent years as my own mother has become ill and unable to do the cooking, Thanksgiving has moved to my house (which ironically is the same house in which my grandmother lived, so it's sort of come full circle).  Nobody comes anymore, though.  the Dallas family saves their holiday trip for Christmas.  I always cook just for us, me, Steve, and my son John.  After we eat I always take a plate to mom. 

And like my mother, I pull out the nice dishes, the tablecloth, the candles.  I cook way more food than the three of us need.  But, it's hard to let go of those traditions, you know?

It will be a quiet holiday but one with lots of love and lots of food!  And new traditions are always liable to spring up when you least expect them.  This year my brother will be joining us, or at least, I've invited him.  And if we aren't too stuffed tomorrow evening, Steve and I are going to attend the Thanksgiving dinner at the American Legion to support those that don't have any family at all and try to help make a brighter holiday for them.

Holidays are always bittersweet for me as I remember the good times of the past, the people that are no longer with us, and the family that can't be here.  But there's so much to be thankful for. 

Happy Thanksgiving to you and I hope you take the time to enjoy Thanksgiving.  Christmas will come soon enough.  One holiday at a time, please.

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Take a Picnic Trip to the Lock and Dam and a Detour to Lake Bistineau

I'm here.  Blogging is on my back burner right now as I continue to sit with my mom in the hospital after school and on weekends.  She's been in the hospital just over four weeks now with a fractured neck.  She's still heavily medicated and not clear in her head about just about everything. It's grim but we are praying for a recovery and trying to make her as comfortable as possible.

Every now and then I just have to get out of there, though, for my own mental health.  Steve and I took the top off the Jeep today and drove down to Lock and Dam #5 on the Red River.  We like going down there and looking at the river and listening to the water.

It's a pretty spot and they've got it all fixed up with picnic tables and grills.  There are always people there fishing or just hanging out watching the water.  We've yet to catch it at a time when a boat is going through the locks but that would be very cool.  Maybe one day we'll hit it at the right time.  Steve likes watching the cranes and egrets (I guess that's what they are...).   It's just a relaxing spot.  Part of it is that I'm just drawn to water, I think.



Today there were several families out there and lots of people fishing.  And look down in the bottom right corner of this picture:  there's a person swimming in that gross, stagnant looking pool off to the side.



I'm not sure I'd have jumped in right there, ya know?  Looked dangerous to me, and all the algae and sticks drift off over there and just sit.  Gross.

I packed an Igloo with brats and potato salad, and some snacks, and we fired up one of the grills and fixed lunch.  I tried to remember everything, but you always forget something, I guess.  I forgot the paper plates.

But because we are so clever and resourceful, we made plates out of aluminum foil.  Guess which one is mine:


While we waited for the coals to get ready I walked down the rocks almost down to the river.  All these people fishing just stomp on down there like it's nothing, but I creep down the rocks slowly, searching tentatively for a sound foothold before taking each step.  One too many rolled ankles has made me less of a daredevil than I used to be.


Coming up was much faster for some reason.

Weeds or flowers?  I thought they were cheerful, either way:


And then it was time to cook.  In honor of Oktoberfest kicking off this weekend in Munich, we opted for brats:


I guess they look a mess here, but they were pretty darn good:


All doctored up and placed on my fine plate:


After we ate we doused the coals, cleaned out our grill, and climbed back in the Jeep to head toward Lake Bistineau.

Back in the day, some thirty-five years ago I guess, I used to go skiing on Lake Bistineau.  I had a friend with a 15-1/2 foot Glastron ski boat and I had my own O'brien ski and oh did we have fun on the lake!  Long summer days skiing all day, drinking a little beer, listening to some music, laughing and being young.

Boy was it ever depressing to see the lake now.  Good golly almighty.

Lake Bistineau has been battling a salvinia problem and it's just about killed the lake from what I can see.  I'm sure there are still some pretty spots on the lake but this is at Green Park:


We saw one dilapidated, trashed out trailer after another on the roads around the lake and one dried up marina after another.

When my friends and I went skiing, we used to put in at Plum Orchard.  The pictures in my memory are very different from what is there now.  The road into the marina is still there; I remembered the big tree and the asphalt turn around, but the store was gone.  So was most of the water.  This is the boat ramp:


You can see where the water line used to be.  La. Dept of Wildlife and Fisheries is drawing the water down to help kill the salvinia:

 In an effort to control aquatic vegetation, the water control structure on Lake Bistineau near Minden, La., will be opened on August 8, 2012, for a lake drawdown.
As a result of mild winter temperatures, giant salvinia has expanded beyond the control capacity of herbicide applications and salvinia weevils.  Louisiana Department of Wildlife and Fisheries survey estimates show giant salvinia coverage to be in excess of 2,000 acres.
The lake will be lowered 7 feet below pool stage and will remain lowered until January 31, 2013. 
But from the looks of things, that marina died a long time ago.

I walked out on the pier and took this; this is the channel we took leading to the open lake (the sign says "No Wake"):


And this just made me sad:


Really depressing.  Here is a history of the Lake Bistineau drawdowns; it's been controversial from day one.

At any rate, it was starting to get late so we headed back to town.  What I love about driving with the top down is that you can feel the cold pockets when you're driving down the road, you can smell the pines or a burning trash pile.  You can stop and visit with a fellow on the side of the road who is watering his goat.  (No, we really did.  "That's a prize goat!" he told us!)  We waved at old timers sitting on their porch in Doyline, and at a motorcycle group driving down Highway 80.  At a stop light in town I took this picture of birds on a wire and I wouldn't have been able to do that with a roof on my car!


Sunset over Shreveport:


It was a nice, relaxing day.  Now on to the work week.


The SIGIS Take a Trip Series:
Take a Trip to the 2012 Defenders of Liberty Air Show at BAFB
Take a Springtime Trip to Second Hand Rose Antiques in Minden, LA
Take a Trip to Logansport, Louisiana
Take a Trip to the Lock and Dam on Red River
Take a Trip to the 2012 Barkus and Meoux Parade
Take a Christmas Shopping Trip to Second Hand Rose in Minden
Take a Trip to Grand Cane's Fifth Annual Pioneer Trade Day
Take a Trip to the 2011 Highland Jazz & Blues Festival
Take an Autumn Trip to Jefferson, Texas
Take a Fall Trip to Second Hand Rose Antiques in Minden
Take a Trip to the 8th Air Force Museum at Barksdale Air Force Base
Take a Summertime Trip to Grand Cane
Take a Trip to Desoto Parish
Take a Summer Trip to Second Hand Rose Antiques in Minden
Take a Trip to Natchitoches and Melrose Plantation 
Take a Trip to Ed Lester Farms and a Random Antique Stop
Take a Trip to the Norton Art Gallery and the Masters of Cuban Art Exhibit
Take a Trip to Natchitoches to See the Christmas Lights
Take a Trip to Natchitoches and Oakland Plantation
Take a Trip to Jefferson, Texas