Where Eagles Zayre

This weekend was a momentous occasion for me: the anniversary of the April 29, 1984 Zayre circular. It happens to be the earliest retail store ad I've ever found with Transformers mentioned in it, so it's a bit of an historic milestone to me. Its significance lies not just in when it appeared chronologically but also in what it shows. Zayre 4/29 (as I call it) packs a ton of great photo and written elements that continue to be a source of much pondering and contemplation for me. Not the least of these wonderful details is that fantastic Starscream. So to commemorate the 'adniversary' I spent my Sunday finishing a replica of what at first glance looks to be just another Starscream, but that in actuality was more, much more than met the newspaper over 30 years ago.



IN ZAYRE NO ONE CAN SEE YOUR STARSCREAM

I've already covered my initial attempt at recreating the Zayre 4/29 ad and how because of Starscream I fell short of doing a satisfactory job. The main reasons I goofed up were that I didn't pay enough attention to details plus my ad colorization was done in a hurry as I was rushing to include it in a slide presentation for my panel at JoeLanta 2017. Originally I thought I could grab a bunch of my existing toys and digitally photomanipulate them into the ad. Then I noticed the major differences with the Starscream I was using relative to the one in the ad. By the time I realized my Starscream didn't match, it was too late to build a more ad accurate photoshoot model. So just how tremendously different is the Zayre version from my childhood '84 mass release production model? Would those differences make it next to impossible to kitbash an accurate copy? Taking a closer look would prove surprising...



THE DEVIL IN THE DECALS

With the original ad lost to time and only a monochromatic microfilm image to guess what it looked like, I at first thought it would be difficult to dig out much detail. But thankfully the defining quirks of Zayre Starscream are rather huge and obvious even in black and white. The biggest is that the forward extending point of each wing (or 'wingpoint' as coined by Maz at tf-1) running along the fuselage is longer and pointier than that of mass release Starscream wings. Another characteristic is the missing Decepticon sigil on the nosecone, which is a consumer applied label. At first I didn't think much of it, but then I realized I'd seen a long wingpoint/no Decepticon sticker nosecone Starscream before-in the 1984 Transformer pack in catalog! Then the clincher was what appeared to be writing on the jet intake sticker where my production Starscream only had a blank yellow area. I began to realize that making a simple kitbash of this toy as it appeared in the ad would not be easy at all.

SO WHAT IS IT?

To understand what this toy is you have to know the origins of the Starscream toy as a Diaclone Real&Robo Series Jet Machine Robo F-15 High Speed Fighter Type. So they started as Takara Jet Robos then Hasbro sticker manipulated a few of those into Transformers for early promotional photography. It is my conjecture based on my analysis of the ad that the Zayre Starscream is in fact a Japanese Diaclone f-15 Jet Robo with a mix of Diaclone decals and modified/Hasbro applied custom decals on it to make it look like a production Transformer. How Zayre was able to attain this toy makes for interesting speculation but that is beyond the scope of this post. (I do want to address that question in a future article, though.) For now based on my ad analysis I believe the Zayre Starscream has these most obvious defining characteristics:

Instruction shoot Starscream w/ cockpit
sticker and pointy wingpoints

• Diaclone mold wings with extended wingpoints
• No Decepticon sticker on the nosecone
• Diaclone sticker with 'EAGLE' written on it above the jet intakes
• Solid red stripe and Decepticon sigil on each wing

And based on observations of the original Takara Diaclone Real&Robo Series Jet Machine F-15 Jet Robo High Speed Fighter Type, the Zayre Starscream most likely inherited these less obvious or not as easily discernible characteristics:

• a hard plastic Diaclone mold nosecone
• a Diaclone cockpit sticker omitted from production TFs
• possibly no copyright stamping
• firing missile launchers

It dawned on me that in order to faithfully reproduce the Zayre Starscream I would need more than just a pair of Diaclone wings and some Decepticon stickers. Because of all the sticker differences I would also need some Diaclone 'EAGLE' jet intake stickers, too. What's neat is that affordable reproduction Diaclone F-15 High Speed Fighter label sheets do exist, however the wings themselves are harder to track down. Plus there is the ethical conundrum of mutilating a rare Diaclone original just to transplant its wings on a lesser, more common toy. Plus plus Diaclones are expensive as hell nowadays and not easy to come across. So I was about to give up right there not so much because I didn't want to desecrate a sacrosanct Diaclone toy, but mostly because I am cheap. But then something wonderful happened-Dairycon!



YOU CAN WIN IF YOU DAIR

While I was at Dairycon 2017 I came upon a dealer who had a rather infamous bootleg jet. It was the Kingdam RoboJet F-15, and because it was knocked off directly from the Diaclone mold it had those elongated wings I needed. But even though it was a bootleg it was in such beautiful and complete shape that I'd feel bad parting it out just to make my Zayre photoshoot Starscream. I asked the dealer if he had a pair of just Kingdam wings lying around and he said no and he couldn't part the jet out just to give me the wings because-and get this-if all he had was the fuselage, it could be passed off as an original Diaclone by unscrupulous individuals! I looked at it and sure as heck, it had everything the Diaclone version had down to the cockpit sticker, 'EAGLE' intakes, and hard nosecone. I never noticed how dead on of a copy that thing was. I may not have had the money or guts to mutilate a legit Diaclone F-15, but now I was aware of a suitable stand in should I ever see one in crappy shape. Lo and behold, just a few days later that's exactly what would pop up in the haven of beat up crappy shape knockoffs-eBay!


CONQUEST IS MADE OF THE AUCTIONS OF ONE'S ENEMIES

Just as I ran out of hope that I'd ever find a reasonably priced parts donor for my photoshoot Starscream project, along came eBay auction 112371069453. For $45 it had no launchers but the nosecone, cockpit, and jet intake stickers were all intact. It appeared dark grey in the auction photos and there really is a dark grey Kingdam variant, but it was actually the light grey version. Notable differences from the Diaclone version are the orange canopy and white vertical stabilizers. In the above left photo the plastic quality is so poor it's mostly transparent in places like the vertical stabilizers. The plastic is a shade of grey that doesn't quite match up with any Starscream I have so a simple wing swap wasn't going to work. Ultimately I'd have to use a majority of the Kingdam parts so the color would be uniform but some bits did have to be replaced...


LONG LIVE THE WING

One major consequence of the inferior quality plastic used in the Kingdam bootleg is that the joints the wings plug into and rotate on are super prone to breakage. These 'wing knuckles' as I call them are also pretty shoddily molded on the Kingdam toy, so even if they weren't broken (as they were on my eBay one) I still had to replace them with the cleaner looking Hasbro parts. I also swapped out the orange canopy with a correct smoke colored Hasbro one. The project ended up being slightly more than the simple decal and wing swap I originally thought it would be, but the results were well worth the work.



KING FOR A DAY

In the end I basically had a Kingdam bootleg with a Hasbro Starscream's vertical stabilizers, wing joints & decals, and canopy. It's a bit of a Frankenstein monster but it does a good job of emulating an historic moment in Transformer promotional photographic history. The next step for me would be going back and doing a more accurate recreation of the Zayre 4/29 ad. For now just having this representation of one of the rarest Transformer specimens in history is good enough for me.

Fantastic TransFormers ads and Zayre to find them

The breaking of the 83rd seal of the Roboplastic Apocalypse is the sound of a time machine set for a collision course over Zayre! Yes about the worst, most wonderful terrible thing that can happen to a Monochromatic AdstroNaut like myself is to find the long buried mircofilm remains of now extinct retail store chains I never got to

visit when I was a kid. And it is doubly fantastic awful when I find out a certain store I never knew existed regularly ran amazing Sunday circular ads during the Toy Robots Wars of the 1980s. Well that's exactly the case with the long gone retail chain Zayre-a store whose ads were wonderlands of MotoBots, Diakrons, TransMobots, RoboForce, GoBots, and of course TransFormers. In fact, Zayre's TransFormer ads are legendary (to me) for many reasons, all of which will take a good forty five minutes of me driving back and forth to the library while recording in my van to explain. What is the secret source of the Zayre toy photographer's prototype action figures? What does a time machine set for April 29, 1984 sound like? How much spaghetti did you have to eat before Devastator had lunch with you? I don't know the answers but I got some ideas in this THE NEXT BEST THING TO BEING ZAYRE episode of the podcastalypse!

download it zhere

Zayre April 29, 1984

Colorized Zayre April 29, 1984

DIACLONE, IS THAT YOU?

Zayre may be gone but it left behind a treasure trove of TransFormer ad mysteries. One of the things I like about trying to colorize the old ads I collect is that I find out new things about them I'd previously overlooked. It happened with a Target Devastator giftset ad and it happened again here with Zayre. A problem arose when I was trying to get the proportions of my Starscream photograph to line up with the one in the legendary April 29, 1984 Zayre ad that I first talked at length about in episode 50. For some reason, no matter what angle I took Starscream's picture from, the right wing wouldn't line up correctly to match the proportions of the one in the ad!

HERE'S A HINT

That's when I noticed the tip portion of the wing forward of the arm joint in the ad photoshoot Starscream extended just a little bit longer than the same part on my childhood Starscream. From what I understand this variation is a vestige of the ad toy's origins as an actual Diaclone F-15 Jetrobo. That mold had these elongated wings and a few other differences from the actual production toy. They really aren't the mass retail versions at all, but Japanese release toys with Transformer stickers on them Hasbro slapped together for promotional photography. These Diaclones with Transformer stickers were used in early catalogs including Hasbro's '84 Toy Fair book and the pack in toy checklist that came with the original first few waves of Transformers. To realize I was seeing a dressed up Diaclone in a Zayre Sunday circular surprised me. But I guess the ad was prepared so relatively early in the line's release that Zayre may not have had any retail samples available to photograph so they had to arrange something with Hasbro I guess. That's just speculation on my part. I don't know how they ended up with these particular toys in their ad.

SpaghettiOs May 11, 1986

Victor Caroli narrated Zayre commercial

Here's the May 11, 1986 SpaghettiOs ad I was talking about. I never heard of those cups before so I was excited. Equally exciting was finding out that Zayre once got Victor Caroli to do a voiceover in their commercials!

Zayre November 25, 1984

Zayre March 10, 1985

The November 15, 1984 ad up left is one of the few times robots (TransFormers in particular) dominated the front page of Zayre's circular. Note the yellow Cliffjumpers. The March 10, 1985 page up right shows how Zayre would give equal time to robot lines in their ads, even if some of the also rans weren't as popular as the big lines.

Zayre November 30, 1985

Zayre February 16, 1986

November 30 1985 up left was the only other time Transformers got on the front page of the Zayre circular. The February 16, 1986 ad up right features a rarity in TransFormers ads-Special Team leaders not wearing their super robot helmets!


Zayre June 8, 1986


The Ultra Magnus cab in this June 8, 1986 ad confounds me so! It's obviously not white as a normal production version Magnus' would be. Is it just a red Optimus Prime cab? Is it a blue Powered Convoy cab? How did Zayre even get this particular trailer/cab combination in their photoshoot?

Zayre June 29, 1986

Zayre June 29, 1986 colorized

Sky Lynx is sad he was mistransformed so badly in his Zayre ad debut. This ad also marks the end of Zayre spelling 'TransFormers' with a capital F, which they had done from the beginning.


Zayre July 20, 1986

I like to call this one 'Wreck-Gar's Bad Day'. It has the highest Decepticon-to-Autobot ratio of any ad I've ever seen!


Zayre August 31, 1986


It's the return of Ultra Magnus to Zayre ads and this time he's got the correct color cab. This begs the question of what happened the first time and where does Zayre get the toys for their photoshoots if they're not the same ones every time?


Zayre October 12, 1986


Zayre's record of correctly transforming the Scramble City leaders goes out the window with Silverbolt wearing Superion's head here. Speaking of transforms. Metroplex and Ultra Magnus never appeared as robots in Zayre ads, despite the photographer trying to represent both modes for every other assortment. Trypticon is mentioned in this one but not shown.


Zayre November 9, 1986


These '86 Zayre ads were marvels of composition considering how many elements the photographer had to cram in to each shot. What at first seems like a mistransformation is probably just the photographer trying to keep the toys representative while still not blocking out or getting in the way of anything near or behind them. Sky Lynx's alternate mode is correctly transformed here but offset in a separate graphic. I am noticing a trend where they didn't include doubles of the higher price point toys alongside themselves for display in both modes in the same physical space. It may have been a cost issue, who knows?


Zayre December 7, 1986


Background stars are appropriate as this is the last of the great Zayre Transformer smorgasbords. After 1986 Zayre just did not devote as much space or background rocks to their Transformer ads. At least in the end Metroplex did finally get to have his tallest tower attached in a Zayre ad after having to have them all removed or repositioned to get everything to fit during the previous photoshoots.



SHOW NOTES OF THE PODCASTALYPSE

• The Chicago Tribune archives are now online and free
• Recoloring old ads starting with Devastator giftsets
• The Zayre88 site for extinct retail aficionados
• We Care A Lot about TransFormers because you know why!
• The latest round of K-Mart store closures
• My record of hosting well attended panels ain't that good
• ..but I'll be trying paneling again at JoeLanta
• ..thanks to Rob of ZoneBase

BEHOLD THE MONOCHROMATIC GOBACKATRON 1986THOUSAND

Monochromatic Ad ReCreateAtron: Devastator!

For as long as paleontologists have been unearthing fossils from deep beneath the ground people have wondered, 'What did that Tyrannosaurus skeleton REALLY look like when it was alive?' And for as long as I have been digging up old toy robots ads from black and white reels of microfilm I have wondered, 'What did this Devastator giftset ad from 1985 REALLY look like when it was in color?' I know it's silly wanting to see ads for toys I already have, but the ads were such a big part of the experience at the time that these monochromatic microfilm slides don't cut it for me. Being in the presence of dinosaur bones at a museum is as close as I'll ever be to a real dinosaur and I appreciate that, but sometimes you just want to pull out Jurassic Park and see a Tyrannosaurus eat a lawyer.

Sears 12 Dec 1985	Sears 29 Dec 1985	Toys Plus 19 Dec 1985

Devastator line art is quite common in ads for the Constructicons as demonstrated above. However, most ads it appears in are not for the actual Devastator giftset! Note the '-tion' misspelling commonly found in Transformer ads where '-ticon' is intended.

THE NEXT BEST THING TO SEEING THERE

This ad for the Constructicon giftset is unusual in that it uses the Devastator line art. All other ads I've found use pictures of the combined figure and/or the box. Note the incorrectly attached wing and the detached upper torso and legs. Hasbro apparently did not create 3/4 viewpoint Devastator specific line art so retailers used a version derived from illustrations used in the transformation instructions.

Microfilm works great for preserving the simple line art used in newspaper ads from the seventies and early 80s. Where it fails is in the preservation of color photography, which was used extensively in circulars and fliers starting around the late 60s. Not only are colors completely gone but most scans of photograph based ads are so badly underexposed it's hard to make out any details. This is true for ads of just about every robot toyline and case assortment I've found but it especially bothers me in the case of Devastator and the Constructicons. Usually I would be satisfied with whatever line art ads I can pull off microfilm but Hasbro really dropped the ball with Devastator's line art. It's as if they were content to use the final step in the transformation instructions booklet which shows the Constructicons just about to combine but not quite there yet, and use that for the repro art they sent to retailers for use in ads. It's horrible. Devastator just didn't get good ad representation except for when retailers took color photos of it for their ads. But a nice full color Devastator ad is not completely out of my grasp. I do have at least two options.

Target 22 Dec 1985	Gold Circle 27 Nov 1985	Zayre 11 May 1986 This ad can be seen in context at the Chicago Tribune.

JUST BECAUSE I SHOULD DO IT DOESN'T MEAN I COULD

I know of at least three Devastator giftset ads from color store fliers that came out in 1985 and '86 (pictured above). One was from a store called Gold Circle in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Another was in a Target ad I found in Rapid City, South Dakota, and another was from a Zayre ad in Chicago. My first option if I ever want to see these in color is to wait for an actual flier or circular to come up for sale online. Several people all across the country would have to have kept entire newspapers in storage for decades and then decide to sell all of their collections at prices I can afford. Unfortunately the chances of that happening for any one specific ad, especially from the lesser known regional stores are astronomical. The is like hoping a dinosaur still survives in the Amazon somewhere and when you travel to go see it you pray the natives won't scalp you. But then there is a second, more convenient and Hollywood special effectsy option: digital photo manipulation! I could take the ads trapped in microfilm like dinosaur DNA trapped in amber and build my Jurassic Park of K-Mart toy robots ads!



THE RELENTLESS PURSUIT OF IMPERFECTI(C)ON

Close inspection of the Target ad shows the head is placed ON TOP of Hook 's right shoulder peg instead of behind on the waist connector. The figure holds together because the chest wing has a tab inserted into a slot in Long Haul's grill.

I figured that adding color to some old ads was not outside the realm of possibility for me. Many times while going through my collection of microfilm ad scans I've thought-hey, I have that toy. How hard would it be to just take a picture of it and digitally superimpose my toy over the ad? As it turned out, it was very hard. If I wanted to replicate the ads exactly I had to figure out what angle the photographer was shooting from and how far away they were from their subjects. Getting everything lit and lined up exactly right is actually extremely difficult. Thankfully I was able to get satisfactory results with some distortion and perspective effects in the photo manipulation software I was using. (aka: cheating) Then there was the question of exact replication or idealized recreation? I had to ask myself how true to the source ad I wanted to get when recreating the scene-should I mistransform my robot the same way the photographer did? Should I leave accessories out like they did? I decided I wanted to recreate the ads as closely as possible so I tried repeating all the same mistakes the photographers made. It was actually kind of fun that way. I didn't even know it was possible to transform Devastator without his head connected to Long Haul! How did that Target guy even do that?

Target 22 Dec 1985 (colorized)	Gold Circle 27 Nov 1985 (colorized)
Zayre 11 May 1986 (colorized)

I AM BECOME DEATH, THE TED TURNER OF K-MART ADS

I was pretty happy with how the ad recolorizations came out. There are some obvious tells that give away their being digital manipulations but the point of the exercise here is to get in the ballpark. My wife and I got into a discussion about the ethics of doing this because she works in the media and is very conscious of her responsibility to be accurate and factual with photos. I don't believe there is much to worry about because we're not talking about recoloring old movies or bringing velociraptors back to life here. Still, she raised the point that Devastator's arms may have been black in one of the original ads instead of purple like the production toy I used in my photos. So I may be glossing over details that are important from a historical perspective to Transformers historians. I suppose that's true but we'll never know until the original ad pops up, which is unlikely to ever happen. She wanted me to use watermarks and disclaimers and all sorts of other heads up about the manipulation of the source material. I didn't think I needed to go that far. In the meantime my personal policy will be to not include these over at my online ad archive. But I will include them in blog posts here where I'm on the same page with my audience and we all like looking at these old fossils of a bygone era when Dinobots ruled the earth.

THE HOLIDAY CRUSH!

The seventeenth seal of the Roboplastic Apocalypse snaps like so many people's limbs on the day after Thanksgiving as they get trampled by rabid mobs of toy robots seeking shoppers! Thrill to the adventures of the Nostrodomatron as I travel back in time to black Friday 198X in my insatiable quest to expose shopping season mysteries like why advertising Transformers in December of '84 was a recipe for broken bones and whether or not GoBots controlled the media. Plus a trip to a local comic book store to look at old toy robots (but not buy them) and discussion of the two greatest toy robots newspaper ads ever. It's DARK OF THE SATURDAY in the Kingdom Roboplastico and you're invited! (All you have to do is wake up early 26 years ago.)


Or download it directly

Circus World 28 November-The best ad of '84...	...because of the back page!

SHOW NOTES OF THE PODCASTALYPSE

Toys R Us 06 November 1985-The best ad ever!

• Opening poem-"The Roboplastic Podcastalypse" (Fort Lauderdaliens version)
• Toy Planet is the coolest store IN THE UNIVEEEEEERSE
• Some guys go to Tate's
• Somewhere a Snarf fan wonders why nobody's buying Grendizers
• The seven pound Luchadoratron
• Some guys talk about Shogun Warriors
• Mr. Big's Toyland
• Salute to Katherine Van Hart
• No toystores for old robots
• OH GOD IT WAS A PLAYWORLD ROBOTRONS COMMERCIAL (pause it at 1:47 and look under the He-Mans)
• Plus the greatest toy robots newspaper ads runners up ever...
• Honorable mention #1-Robinsons 30 November 1984
• Honorable mention #2-Zayre 14 October 1984

In an age of toy robots with names lame and strange, came one mighty game...

There are many ways to market a good or service but the science of promotion is complex and difficult. The basic necessities of life like sex and toilet paper people will buy regardless-those don't depend on commercials as much. But what about everything else that is not sex or toilet paper? What about products for which there is no DNA encoded caveman instinct driving people to do what must be done so that the human race may continue? Well that's where marketing comes in. Marketing exists to exploit want.

TG&Y 12/08/85

Want people have for things they do not need is a marketer's best friend, for his ally is the want and a powerful ally it is. Life creates it, makes it grow. Its energy surrounds us and binds us. It makes us buy Star Wars on multiple home video formats and even sometimes over and over again on the same format.

IT IS HARD TO TELL IF A TOY ROBOT IS IN ONE OF THOSE

The problem is that people don't really want 99 percent of everything that is not toilet paper or Star Wars. So then figuring out what people want and then tricking them into thinking that what you make is what they want is what marketing is all about. Manufacturers and businesses since the dawn of time have devoted countless years of study trying to make their products more appealing, either through the subliminal insertion of vaginal imagery in ads or as a last resort, by actually making good stuff. Unfortunately subliminal vaginas only have niche appeal. Luckily back in the 80s manufacturers and businesses found there was no better way to make your stuff good than to put a toy robot in it. Whether you were selling sandwich bags, cereal or diabetes inducing heart attacks, working toy robots into the mix was a sure fire way to rake in the dough. This is still done today, albeit with mixed results

Children's Palace 11/10/85	Playworld 12/01/85

GODS, WAR, MONSTERS, ROCK, RETURN, THE JEDI AND OTHER WORDS THAT GO GREAT TOGETHER WITH "OF"

Board game manufacturer Lakeside understood the magical marketing power of toy robots so in 1985 they came out with a robot themed adaptation of their previous game Crossbows and Catapults. Except this time instead of being all medieval with an uninspired title, their new game was set in the future and they gave it the incredibly badass name Immortals of Change. It is possibly the ballsiest toy robot product brand ever. I have spent countless years of study trying to figure out why "Immortals of Change" sounds so awesome. It's the most heavy metal, mythological, roboplastastic title ever. I have tried to break it down into a formula and apply the IoC magic to other toy robots lines and gotten mixed results. I found turning "Rock Lords" into "Lords of Rock" is definitely an improvement that sounds like a metal concert festival at the Vatican but some of the lamer Transformer names couldn't be saved. Like turning "Jumpstarters" into "Starters of Jump" came out pretty bad and even worse, "Headmasters" becomes something more terrifying than "subliminal vaginas".

Zayre 11/24/85	Toys R Us 11/27/85

I HAVE SEEN THE FUTURE OF ROBOT WAR AND IT IS GIANT RUBBER BAND POWERED FLYING DISC CAPAPULTS

The Immortals of Change playset is awesome because not only does it include enough warriors, walls and towers to recreate Lord of the Rings with robots on your kitchen floor but the towers are made of modular pieces that can be reconfigured into different kinds of disc launching machines and robots. I was reading messageboards where people who had it as kids said they disregarded the game aspect of the set and just used the pieces as the backdrops for their G.I. Joe and Transformer battles. This is brilliant because Transformers suffered those first two years from neutered rocket launchers with wimpy springs and everyone knows you can't have a really good robot war without flying projectile based ass kickings.

Playworld 12/11/85

For a moment I got all caught up in the 25 year old ad hype plus reading the online testimonials to IoC's greatness so I couldn't resist and I looked it up on eBay. It turns out the set pops up every now and then and can usually be bought for under 30 bucks. Shipping is a killer though, because the box is so big but the winning bids are usually pretty low. One set in particular went for 99 cents on ebay last week. Actually it didn't go anywhere because nobody bid on it. Dang! I did a little internet researching on the history of that particular item and discovered the seller guy found it at a thrift store and bought it for 3 bucks. So they're out there. Unfortunately for me the days of staging epic robot wars on the kitchen floor are long gone. I'm sure that after seeing the size of the giant rubber bands used in the Immortals of Change disc launching catapults my 25 year old toy robots are grateful I feel that way. Also, probably so is my dog.

ADDITIONALLY, A GREAT NAME FOR A BANK

Lakeside sure had a way of coming up with marketable names. I think if I ever opened up my own gas station I would call it Immortals of Oil Change. All the mechanics would dress up like Greek gods but with Ben Cooper robot masks that attach to our heads by rubber bands and I would append the names of all the services we'd provide with "of power". "Yes sir, would you like the Oil Change...of Power?" I've always wanted to reclaim "of Power" ever since She-Ra pansyfied it with her whole princess shtick. And all of our tools would be called "of the gods". "Oh, I see your hood has some dings from hail damage. COME TO ME MIGHTY MJOLNIR, DENT PULLER OF THE GODS!" It would be awesome. Until then, Immortals of Change the game stands as the greatest use of robots, rubber bands and nonsensical prepositional phrasing I have ever seen.