Does Global boss Stephen Miron listen to his own stations?

The Radio Festival is one, which means it's just about time for Global Radio to complain that the BBC is too good for them. Rather than improve their own output, they prefer to demand the BBC enshittifies itself below their level. With the time the BBC is having at the moment, the worry is someone might take them seriously.

Hilariously, Global's Stephen Miron. is convinced the BBC is copying his channels:

Miron said: "Radio 1 is squarely up against Capital, Radio 2 is right up against Heart, Radio 3 against Classic."

Capital is currently playing some chart records. Radio One is hosting a 1xtra themed concert in Manchester.

Heart has just played Beyonce; Radio 2 has got Diana Krall playing a piano session.

Classic FM are soothing listeners with a bit of Chopin; Radio 3 are playing Artie Shaw.

You'd have to have a tin ear to think the stations nearly identical. Mind you, having a tin ear might explain the Global playlists...

Jeremy Hunt suddenly worries about media plurality

Here's a lovely picture of the wonderfully impartial Jeremy Hunt having fun with Rupert Murdoch at the Olympics:

[It's from eyespymp on Twitter; don't worry, Rupert won't be upset, he loves photos shot from a distance exposing shady dalliances. His papers are full of them.)

Besides being enormous fun, what is the relevance of this photo? Well, hanging out with the boss of a company which the Met Police is considering bringing action against that company's board isn't the only thing that Hunt spent the end of the week doing.

He's also referred the Global Radio takeover of GMG Radio for an investigation.

On one level, this is as it should be - Global is taking on a few more stations and could be seen as reducing choice still further. Although, really, since Global and GCap merged, there's not been a great deal of plurality in commercial radio in the UK.

I might be being unfair to Hunt, but he was shadow culture secretary at the time Global and GCap merged, and I can't find any evidence he was exercised about that much more significant reduction of plurality in the radio world when that happened.

Indeed, Richard Eyre was the chairman of GCap who steered the merger with Global, and for his efforts Jeremy Hunt rewarded him with a position on the review into the plausibility of hyperlocal television in the UK.

So taking two large radio groups and turning them into one makes you an expert in local media plurality in Hunt's eyes, but folding a smaller radio group into a bigger one is a threat to that plurality. Somehow.

It seems even odder that Hunt - a man who we know to have been cheerleading for the UK's largest newspaper group to be given sole control over the UK's largest pay-TV operation - is suddenly worried that the changing hands of a small radio company needs to have a full investigation.

But then... the TV deal featured his chums The Murdochs. Could the detail that it's the Guardian Media Group selling the radio stations in this case be the cause of the sudden interest?

If Jeremy Hunt really believes that radio ownership is an issue, then why not prove that by holding an investigation into the industry as a whole? It's well needed, as anyone who has struggled to find out what's happening in their town using just a commercial radio station will testify.

Otherwise, this looks like just another politically-motivated piece of poor judgement from a man who makes something of a habit of such moves.

Global Radio to launch two unwatched music channels

As more and more TVs get connected to the internet, with the ability to stream YouTube and other videos through the big screen, is there any segment of the TV industry looking more doomed than the music video channel?

We can only assume Global needs a massive tax write-off, then, as it brings Capital and Heart to the TV.

Yes, not one brand, but two largely unloved and virtually identical brands. Pumping out videos 24 hours a day.

Why?

Apparently brands unextended are not brands at all:

[Ashley] Tabor, Global's founder and executive president, said: "Global prides itself on clear, simple brand propositions for its consumers.

"Brand extension is a natural thing for us to do, for example online, mobile and live events, so I'm delighted we're now bringing both Heart and Capital's top-class brand quality to music television."

Living in Milton Keynes, my experience of people's view of Heart's brand quality would mean the TV service should operate for years under the Horizon brand, with lots of local content, before slowly declining and eventually adopting the Heart branding timed with an 'All Bruno Mars, all the time' policy.

It might sound crazy to launch music video channels in 2012, but in a way, it makes sense - nobody watches Heart when it's on the radio, and nobody will watch it on the TV.

Guardian sell up radio stations; rivals livid

The Guardian Media Group has flogged off its radio arm to Global Radio, prompting much unhappiness amongst other radio groups:

UTV Media is also "seeking urgent clarification" as to how Global Radio can claim to be holding GMG Radio as a separate business during the regulatory scrutiny period, while it has brought in two senior executives to run its new acquisition following the departure of chief executive Stuart Taylor.
[...]
A spokesman for Bauer Media said the deal will "permanently lessen" choice for radio advertisers.

"Bauer Media believes the merger of Global and GMG Radio will be fully investigated by the competition authorities as this combination will increase the dominant market position that Global already has in local and national markets and permanently lessen choice for radio advertisers," he said. "We have no further comment to make at this time."

It's not so much that UTV Radio or Bauer are particularly exercised by plurality of ownership or actual choice:

UTV Media and Bauer Radio are understood to have submitted unsuccessful bids to buy GMG Radio

So it's more foot-stomping at the reduction of choice not resulting in the increase of their market share, then.

Global Radio wants BBC to hurry up spreading outdated technology

Ashley Tabor, who runs commercial radio effort Global, has been moaning to the Radio Festival that the BBC isn't pouring enough cash down the DAB drain:

BBC director general Mark Thompson recently confirmed that the corporation would fund the rollout of its national digital multiplex to reach 97% of the population.

But Tabor said the issue of local and regional DAB coverage was still unresolved, something he had spent "all year" raising with the BBC without conclusion.

I suspect there has been a conclusion - the BBC concluding that it's probably best to not take calls from Tabor any more.

Ten years ago, DAB had its crack at being the coming thing, and a speedy roll-out would have cemented its position as a distribution mechanism. But the commercially-funded plans were never fulfilled, and now: well, who would buy a DAB radio instead of one that uses IP radio instead? Is anyone really thinking the pisspoor commercial selection of channels on DAB is going to make a purchase of DAB a better bet? "Oh, why would I want thousands and thousands of audio channels when I could instead have three or four slightly different variants of Capital?"

If DAB had any sort of future, the commercial sector would be rushing to build it and enjoy the riches for itself. Instead, it expects the BBC to fund its distribution network for it.

"What has not been agreed yet is the local and regional layers which are not yet at FM equivalent. That is really important," Tabor told the Radio Festival in Salford on Tuesday.

"Does digital radio have a place in the broadcast ecology? Of course. Does radio have a place in digital? Of course. That's a very different thing to switchover.

"At the moment 68% of listening is still analogue, FM reaches every valley in the country. DAB doesn't. That's a key issue and the funding to build that out still hasn't been nailed yet."

Digital radio, absolutely. Radio as part of the digital world, certainly. But that it doesn't follow that DAB is the delivery mechanism for that. Given commercial radio isn't that interested in making programmes or networks for DAB, and people don't want to buy DAB radios, why try and bully the BBC into building transmitters to link up the two uninterested parties?

Global close Radio Mercury as was

As the shakeout of Global's policy of replacing local stations with centrally-networked programming continues, someone in London has spotted that if you live in Crawley you can hear their Gold service on the old Capital and Southern Sound AM frequencies, as well as the local old Mercury one.

So it's decided to dump the Crawley version.

I suspect that as few people complained when the local programming went, hardly anyone will be bothered by a transmitter being switched off.

Commercial radio doesn't like the BBC

It's not just Nadine Dorries ('we don't need a national broadcaster because ITV have made a period drama') doing cartwheels this morning over the defenestration of the BBC; just yesterday commercial radio was blaming BBC Radio for being too good.

Every few weeks, someone from commercial radio says that Radios 1 and 2 should be made substantially poorer to encourage people to listen to them, instead. This time round, it's Ashley Tabor, who is head of Global, who is saying it's just not fair:

"These two powerhouse radio stations should do what they were set up to do — provide that which cannot be provided commercially, that's where the value is. Good-quality content which is not commercially viable."

Tabor, presumably, isn't so ignorant of radio history that he's really proposing the stations be run along the lines they were established on in 1967, when there was no commercial radio at all broadcasting from the UK.

I'm not sure Radio 1 and 2 have even been told their role is only to broadcast non-commercially viable stuff, but given that commercial radio is apparently incapable of producing programmes of the quality of the two BBC networks, that would appear to be what happens more-or-less by accident.

The Global boss said Radio 1 was not doing enough to support new British music, adding that he wanted it to break at least 10 new UK bands next year — and described its playlist as "very, very mainstream".

But if Radio 1 doesn't mix Top 40 music with new bands and acts, how is it going to "break" (by which I guess Tabor means 'help towards the mainstream') anything?

And if a band is broken by Radio 1, does that mean they're then mainstream and should be dropped from the radio station straight away? Is Tabor suggesting the Sunday night Top 40 rundown should only be allowed to play the new entries?

To be frank, I'd be very surprised if setting some sort of confused 'break bands' target to 10 wouldn't mark a major reduction in the number of acts given support by the BBC in their early years. And would a band that finds a small audience who follows them for years, but doesn't have a top ten hit, be considered a mark for this mysterious target or not?

Tabor likes strange maths, though:

He claimed the two stations were delivering on only 30% of their public service commitments.

I'd love to see his working on that. Does the announced Panorama-style programme on Radio 1 bring us up to 32%?

Paul Keenan - head of Bauer's radio things - has another cunning plan:

Paul Keenan, chief executive of Kiss and Magic parent Bauer Radio, said the two BBC stations could be used as a key driver in encouraging digital take-up by removing them from analogue and making them digital-only, including digital audio broadcasting (DAB).

"If you moved Radio 1 and Radio 2 that would show us the way [on digital]," Keenan told the BBC's director of audio and music, Tim Davie, at the Radio Festival in Salford.

Paul Keenan, I hope you never play poker, as it's probable you'd hold your cards the wrong way round.

You're really suggesting that commercial radio would invest in DAB if Radio 1 and 2 went DAB-only?

Really?

Because given that commercial radio spends every minute of every day whining about how it can't compete with Radio 1 and 2, why would you then rush to join them on a largely unadopted platform? If you really thought there was a future in DAB, you'd be investing in it and campaigning for Radio 1 and 2 to be kept off it.

Presumably Bauer's radio networks have got so used to assuming its audience is a bit dull that they've forgotten we're not all idiots.

Dunstable rallies to save its Heart

Even after years of having been abused and rebranded by Global and the previous owners, Dunstable's Heart FM is still held in high esteem by its local audience. They're, understandably, upset at the suggestion that their local station is going to be shunted off to the godforsaken hell that is checks paperwork Milton Keynes.

So far, the campaign hasn't progressed beyond the not-actually-doing-anything of a Facebook page, but the organiser is heartfelt:

Jo Dawkins, 39, of Pitstone, launched a Facebook campaign to halt the move. The web page now has more than 750 followers and is growing daily.

She is worried that the move could spell the end of all the local news the station normally reports on.

The mum also fears for the popular presenters who currently front the show.

It does demonstrate that the localness of the local stations is precisely what makes them special to the audience. Global may or may not take any notice of the Facebook page, but perhaps they should be listening to the free focus group they've got here.

Global rip Heart out of local radio

Just when you think that Global are done making local radio rubbish, they announce new plans to make it even more rubbish. Ofcom has allowed them to cut the number of Heart stations from 33 to 15.

Yes, what were once local radio stations are now going to become something else entirely - vaguely distant radio, perhaps?

Ashley Tabor, the Global Radio founder and Global Group chief executive, said Ofcom's regulatory change "enables commercial radio to organise itself more efficiently and take advantage of new technology to enable our people to work smarter".

"Although this has meant some brave decisions for our business, these changes considerably strengthen our company by providing listeners with higher quality programming and our customers with a far superior service," Tabor added.

Yes. Because why would you want to listen to programming from where you live, when you could tune in to something coming from the other side of the country?

It's fascinating to see Tabor use the phrase "enable our people to work smarter", an irritating and empty cliche which even the hardest-hearted management wonk dropped from their repertoire around the same time as 'do more with less' was recognised to be little more than a polite way of yelling 'do more work for less money' at a browbeaten staff.

Let's take a look at what this all means by seeing what they're doing here in Milton Keynes. What used to be Horizon Radio was turned into Heart Milton Keynes a while ago, and now will become Heart Home Counties:

Another new station, Heart Home Counties, will be made up of four Heart stations currently broadcasting from Northampton, Milton Keynes, Bedford and Dunstable.

Because of the changes, Heart is going to double its local news - to one whole minute every hour. But, erm, it's quadrupling the area it covers. So, in effect, you're going to wind up getting half as much local news as you used to.

This is what Global believe to be "higher quality programming".

And 'Home Counties'? Seriously, who calls where they live The Home Counties? Unless you're taking part in Round Britain Quiz, it's not a phrase that people really use in every day life. And Northamptonshire isn't even one of the Home Counties anyway.

Things get worse diagonally across the nation:

Four more stations in Wales and the north-west of England will become Heart North-West and Wales, broadcasting out of Wrexham.

Granada used to have to try and pretend that there was some sort of connection between Chester, Rhyl and Skelmersdale because of an accident of geography. But there isn't, not really, and this sort of 'draw a line around some places and that's a coherent region' approach shows exactly how much contempt Global have for their audiences.

How much longer till the 15 fall into a quasi-national, single blob, then?

Haiti: UK Radio industry decides it has done enough

Radio Today floated an idea earlier in the week suggesting that the earthquake in Haiti might warrant a repeat of the UK Radio Aid campaign, when commercial radio stations came together to raise funds to help out with the Boxing Day Tsunami relief effort.

It didn't take long for the idea to be dumped on. Radio Today reports:

an email to Justin [Kings, who wrote the original article] from Jonathan Richards, who is the Group News Editor and Programme Director of LBC, says: "Whilst we appreciate the sentiment of your Radio Today article the idea is not something we feel is appropriate at this time.

"All Global Radio brands are proud to be playing a full role in supporting the DEC appeal, and, in our view this is the correct way to proceed in terms of co-ordinating the fund raising efforts of UK commercial radio stations. Our news bulletins have covered the Haiti story extensively (and continue to do so). In line with other UK commercial radio stations Global brands including LBC 97.3 and 95.8 Capital FM are broadcasting the DEC appeal commercials. As you are probably aware the DEC campaign is already the most successful since their tsunami appeal five years ago."

That might seem to be a little mean-spirited - it's not quite 'we've mentioned the earthquake on the news, what more do you want us to do?' but certainly heading in that direction.

The reference to the DEC ads and appeal as a reason for inaction is puzzling - yes, DEC have raised more than in any appeal since the tsunami. But they'd raised more for tsunami victims - which was when the last Radio Aid happened.

The real difference, you have to conclude, is that there are fewer radio companies around now. Back in 2005, there were more groups, and presumably the sense of not wanting to be the group that said 'no' persuaded people to say yes. Now, with great swathes of the country dominated by Global, there's less of that competitive push to do the right thing.

Still, they'll be sure to report on the money other people are donating on the news. Let's not lose sight of that.

Galaxy told to shut up about iTunes

The commercial radio network chart show - now called bigtop40.com - has been told off by Ofcom for mentioning iTunes too much.

During the programme, listeners have been encouraged to head over to iTunes to buy downloads and "influence the chart" right up to the last minute. Ofcom has decided that this went a bit too far, and told them to stop doing it. ("Thus ruining its raison d'etre", as Simon T observes - indeed, there does seem to be a desire to earn whatever the referral fee is these days.)

Ofcom accepted that reference to “the iTunes top ten” was editorially justified as a means to explain the specific source and nature of the Big Top 40 chart’s top ten places. Likewise, Ofcom accepted that an occasional reference to the Big Top 40 chart being “powered by iTunes” could be editorially justified as a means to explain the nature of the entire chart, which was influenced by iTunes as a data source. However, Ofcom did not consider that the repeated references throughout the programme to iTunes (whether referring to the top ten or the chart more generally) served any further purpose and therefore appeared gratuitous. Ofcom considered there was insufficient editorial justification for the sheer number and frequency of these references.

What's equally interesting is that iTunes only "powers" the Top 10 of the chart:

While the top ten of the Big Top 40 chart reflect iTunes’ top singles download sales, positions 11 to 40 in the chart are informed by iTunes sales data but ultimately decided by Global Radio.

In other words, if I'm reading that correctly, three quarters of the chart is just made up? What sort of chart is this, anyway?

Also interesting is that Ofcom don't seem to have bothered themselves by asking if the claim that buying some downloads in the last hour of sales is really going to have any influence on the chart - set against a week's sales nationwide?

Ben Perreau to attempt to bring coherence to Global online

Ben Perreau - former editor of the online edition of NME and currently with Sky - is going to take over Global Radio's websites.

Perreau is to be director of digital content, which raises the question of what's the difference between him and his boss, Robin Pembrooke, who is director of online and interactive. Let's hope they're not also seeking a director of internet operations and a director of websites.

Still, Pemberton's appointed a good man, and even if he doesn't quite seem sure why, he's happy with his choice:

Pembrooke said: "We're thrilled to have found someone with Ben's track record of growing audiences and creating innovative online offerings for music fans. His appointment strengthens our capabilities to deliver fantastic online experiences for our listeners.

"He joins at a critical time when our brands are reaching record audiences on new platforms like iPods, mobiles and next-generation digital radios."

If they're new platforms, doesn't it stand to reason the audiences will be "record"? Even Heart isn't so bad it would manage to see an audience fall on a platform it hasn't used before.

And I'm sure Pemberton's slightly rambling-but-warm announcement doesn't really suggest that Global knew they needed to do something but were in desperate need of someone who knew what they should be doing.

Global Radio: Home of the work experience trainee

Global Radio has been struggling to balance its books, and carry out the cussedly difficult job of broadcasting radio programmes shortly after letting 200 of its staff go.

That's "letting them go" in the same way that the rugby team let their colleagues go when they crashed in the Andes.

So how do you keep the stations on air?

Ashley Tabor has a plan:

"I have been trying to find a way to harness the passion for radio amongst young people," he told the world, well the UK, earlier this week.

The plan is to recruit 500 work-experience lackeys per year. "The Global Academy will ultimately create a supply of real talent to the commercial radio industry," Tabor proclaimed.

Now, there's something noble about the idea of training young, enthusiastic people in the skills of the radio industry. Assuming they get proper training, and get paid for it while they're receiving it, and that the 500 really talented, well-trained people will have 500 well-paid, valuable jobs waiting for them. That would be brilliant, and represent a massive, brave investment from a company that has no money and a business plan that's currently more wobbly than a three-legged kitten on an ice rink.

Of course, if all they're doing is exploiting people's goodwill and turning their dreams into cheap, button-pushing labour, encouraging hopefuls to spend years in low-paid positions on the promise of a job that doesn't exist, then you really do have to hope that Global collapses in on itself in a fetid cloud of ill-intentioned exploitation.

But I'm sure Tabor can explain exactly where the UK commercial radio industry will be requiring 500 highly-paid, highly trade staffers in a couple of years, right?

[Thanks to James P]

Ofcom remembers it's a regulator; Global not happy

GWR Bristol, part of the clumsy Global Radio behemoth, has been warned by Ofcom for not actually playing the music it promised to. Ofcom sampled the station and wasn't happy:

This Spot Sampling report arose after Ofcom received complaints that GWR FM is not delivering the music proposition set out in its Format, which is to play ‘contemporary and chart’ music.

After listening to three days of GWR FM’s music output, we found that the overall mix of music being aired by the station was too old for it to be consistent with the Format’s Character of Service.

GWR FM is not operating within its Format and a Yellow Card warning has been issued.

Ofcom was quite fair to GWR - it didn't count The Time Tunnel in its calculations but still found that more than half the music played on the station is over two years old. And it didn't do anything more than issue a warning: play what you were promising to when you were given a licence allowing you access to the finite FM spectrum.

Matter closed?

Oh, no: Global are having a hissy fit and stamping their pretty, London-based feet:

“GWR Bristol was asked to supply music logs to Ofcom by today, Friday 13 March. The requested information was supplied by yesterday, 12 March. Ofcom’s decision was made without reference to either the station, or by talking to its owners, Global Radio.

“This is an extraordinary way for a regulator to behave by issuing a judgement before a deadline has passed. We do not accept this finding, and are considering our position.”

But Ofcom didn't issue a judgement, they issued a warning that if things don't improve, they might issue a judgement. And they didn't really need to wait for the logs - perhaps Global don't realise that their programmes are on the radio and you can find out what they're doing by listening to them.

There is a wider background to this, though, as Global rebrand as many of their stations Heart as they can get away with. Ofcom isn't bothered about the change of name, but is keeping a close eye on Global trying to change Top 40 stations into oldies stations by stealth. Something which it has form for, as Ofcom points out:

This warning concerns GWR Bristol, but we received similar complaints about a number of Global stations and we advise the licensee to take this finding into account for programming across all its CHR stations. Ofcom has had conversations with the licensee about content on its CHR stations in the past.

Of course, if Global really wants to change its format, it can simply hand back the licenses and reapply.

[Story discovered on Mr Trick's Twitter]

Global Radio: Jeni Barnett defends her position

Having blogged yesterday about Global Radio's heavy handed attempts to smother Bad Science (having been quite happy to propagate bad science, without the capital letters).

In the interests of balance, Jeni Barnett has posted a blog entry defending her original broadcast. Or attempting to:

I am not a scientist, I would not claim to be a scientist. When tested on the contents of the MMR vaccine I told the truth. I did not have the facts to hand. Was I ill informed? Yes. As a responsible broadcaster I should have been better prepared as a parent, however, I can fight my corner. I don't know everything that goes into cigarettes but I do know they are harmful.

So... let's just work through that thought. Jeni is admitting that she didn't know what she was talking about; she admits that she was being "irresponsible" as the presenter of the programme for holding forth on a subject about which she didn't have any of the facts, but somehow justifies this because she has a child.

And then she compounds the problems by suggesting trying to create a fallacy: "I don't know what goes into cigarettes, but I know they're bad."

Eh? But surely you know that cigarettes contain carcinogens, which is why they cause cancer. You presumably know there's evidence, lots and lots of it, which links cigarettes to lung cancer. If you don't know about that evidence, you probably shouldn't be broadcasting on radio; you probably should be thinking about doing some basic GCSEs.

But even if that level of ignorance was defensible, saying "I know cigarettes are bad, I don't know how" doesn't justify broadcasting dangerous rubbish about MMR. Because MMR doesn't cause autism, so implying that it doesn't matter you don't understand the science of MMR, it's enough to know it does harm is doubly foolish - it's foolish because it simply isn't good enough to take such a weak approach to a difficult subject; it's foolish because it simply isn't true to claim that there's a danger in the triple jab. And you'd know that if you'd researched the subject. And as you admit, you hadn't.

The real question is why Global are sending legal threats to Ben Goldacre when, really, they should be calling in their presenter and asking why she thinks having procreated is some sort of excuse for taking a biased and wrong position on a programme where she should have been acting as a balanced moderator.

Jeni wails:

I would like some of my critics to try and run a three hour programme.

Eh? You can't call someone for turning up to do a show, admitting they didn't have any facts on the subject they were talking about, and still blasting out fallacious science if you haven't presented a three-hour radio programme. What's that even mean, Jeni? "It's enough having to remember to play the commercials and not crash the news - you can't expect me to know what I'm talking about."

I am interested in the debate not a witch hunt.

A debate - although not one where you're bothered to find out what you're talking about before starting it.

Should anybody from BAD SCIENCE read this I urge you to continue the debate, and if it gets too heated there is always the option of turning me off.

Well, yes, Jeni - except the problem is, anyone can turn you off. What they can't turn off is the rising level of measles cases that are being generated by ignorant commentators like you frightening parents into not getting their children inoculated. And if you're going to justify doing that, it's probably in all our interests to have your show switched off permanently. On the supply side.

Global Radio menaces Ben Goldacre

Ben Goldacre - scourge of bad scientists worldwide - wrote a short feature condemning LBC presenter Jeni Barnett's ignorant and dangerous spouting on vaccinations. In the interests of fairness, he included a long clip of the broadcast about which he was complaining.

For his trouble, he's been hit with legal threats from Global Radio. Goldacre generously assumes the company is merely trying to protect its revenue (unbelievably, you can buy old editions of the Barnett programme for four pounds a pop). It's more likely that LBC are embarrassed at the idea of someone pointing out that they give a platform for biased nonsense and want to shut down any discussion of the programmes that they are unable to control.

Goldacre is appealing for help from anyone who knows a bit of media law.

Heart-breaking

The change-over of a large swathe of the UK's local radio stations from well-loved local brands to the Heart brand is a bit of a marketing challenge. Given that the advantages of the downsizing is all for Global Radio - cheaper to market, cheaper to make - while the listeners don't really get anything out of the deal, how do you sell it?

Badly, it turns out.

These billboards have sprung up around Milton Keynes - probably one out of every four bus stop has started yelling "give it some Heart".

Honestly? When I first saw them my two thoughts were "blimey, the British Heart Foundation's keep fit message this year is a bit scrappy" and then "... but they've got some money to splash on the posters."

The trouble is, you have to get really close to the ads to see that they're related to radio, and announcing a "new radio station" for Milton Keynes. From a distance, seen briefly - as is the case for most posters looking out on dual carriageways - you wouldn't know that's what they're pushing.

It could work, though, as a reminder of a call to action from another medium. And there is a TV advert, too.



This is a rum bit of work. We're supposed to believe that Jamie Theakston is taking the staff photo? Why would that be? Even if things are so tight at Heart that they can't afford a proper photographer, wouldn't it make sense to get someone other than the big name of the network to take the actual photo?

More to the point: Theakston is only on the London station, so it's a bit misleading to have him playing such a key role in the advert, isn't it?

There's also the problem of rebranding so many stations at once. Here in Milton Keynes, on TV, the strapline is "new to Anglia". On the poster, it's "new to Milton Keynes". But the station isn't really new at all - it's an existing brand slapped on a bunch of existing stations. The decision has been taken to pretend that Heart Milton Keynes is all-new, so there's no word on the poster that this is pretty much the Horizon FM you might have known and loved; there are so many different stations covered by the TV advert there's no room to mention the bunch of frequencies they're all broadcasting on. So you don't know it used to be SGR or whatever; you don't know where on the FM dial it is. Googling won't help you. Those posters could have helped solve the problem - scream 'give it some heart' if you must, but put '103.3' in big letters, too.

It was always a rotten idea, but with a bit of thought, at least the switchover to the one brand could have been made friendly for the audience. It looks like the brief, though, was to spend as much money while creating as much confusion as possible.

Hit40UK chart drops physical sales

The chart that isn't the only one which counts, the Hit40UK (what used to be the Nescafe Chart) is no longer going to count CD sales or airplay when totting up the chart positions. It's digital downloads all the way from now, they say:

Paul Jackson, the group programme director for Global Radio brands 95.8 Capital FM, the Xfm and Hit Music Network stations and Hit40UK, said: "Downloads have now become the driving force for record sales, as the statistics clearly show.

"It makes complete sense that the UK's most listened-to chart show reflects the changes in how people are listening to music."

Given that only 4% of the data came from physical sales anyway, it's not really that much of a change. And it's interesting that Jackson isn't keen on reflecting the way that people are, nowadays, listening to music on radio stations that aren't nasty, centrally-programmed, tightly-playlisted formats.

Galaxy 102.2 gets in touch with its audience

Global Radio are probably wishing they'd removed all local programming from their network, after someone managed to break into West Midlands Galaxy 102.2 and started to swear on air, apparently. The phrase "I'm still fucking here" might have been heard, depending on who you choose to believe.

Police arrested the intruder, although it's believed John Noel Management is offering to represent him.

GCap does it again. Twice.

You might have thought that being fined a million quid might have focused the minds a little at Global radio's GCap stations, but it seems not - the new owners are still contacting Ofcom with offences to be taken into consideration: the latest Ofcom bulletin details how one Mercia (soon to be Heart) presenter responded to an April technological breakdown during a competition by, erm, ringing up her neighbour to take part (the neighbour won, surprisingly); meanwhile, on Mercury (soon to be Heart), they simply made up a competition winner's name.

Presumably, though, these will be the last instances to be uncovered?