Disappointment

Well...we don't know what we are to learn from this very difficult period in our lives but there must be something. We went to court today and are pretty bummed about the results. Marissa, the birth mom who told us she would like us to adopt Shane has changed her mind. She now wants Shane back after speaking to her attorney. Her attorney asked her if she could handle not having Shane, not taking him to school or waking up with him and that got her thinking. Next court date is April 8th. We are pretty sad about what happened today. We are trying to stay positive but it's extremely hard. Thanks again to those who fasted, prayed and kept us in their thoughts. I appreciate everyone's text messages this morning as well.

The big day!

Tomorrow is our big day in court. We have put in to get De Facto parent status which if granted will give us the ability to have an attorney present to represent us and give us a voice in the court room. We have had Shane in our home for exactly 14 months and our attorney doesn't see any reason why we shouldn't be granted De Facto status. We have also learned that the county social worker is not recommending reunification any longer. Shane's Mom has decided that she will relinquish her rights and allow us to adopt Shane but Shane's dad is still trying to fight to get him. So in court tomorrow they will decide to either give Shane's dad 6 more months to change or terminate reunification rights. If they are terminated then he will have a chance to appeal which can prolong the process. But we could still be moving towards adoption. Either way we have been told that the process remaining could take about a year before an adoption would be finalized. We haven't put too many details out for everyone to know but we appreciated all of those who prayed and fasted on our behalf. It is much appreciated. We have awesome family and support systems that we love and appreciate. We will keep everyone updated after court tomorrow. Keep us and little Shane in your prayers tonight!!

Foster care blues

Most of you know that Daniel and I are doing foster care right now. We have an awesome little guy who just turned one. We have had him since he was 4 months old. Since we have had him, we've seen him sit up, crawl, walk, say mama and dada and much much more. He has been a joy to have in our home. He is finally in a stable home with a mom and dad to give him the necessary love and needs he requires. So why am I writing about this?
Today is Shane's first visit with his Mom without Daniel or I there with him. Talk about stress and anxiety. Foster care is not for the weak. We (more like i've) have really had to put my controlling cap on lately. We are dealing with an 18 year old woman who wants her son back but will use manipulation to make you feel sorry for her. And when she doesn't get her way, she throws a fit, just like a child. Should I be mad...yes, but really when we take a look at this young woman's life she is really doing this because it is how she survives through life. It's the only way a girl who grew up without a father knows to act to get attention.  It's so frustrating to witness this and then on top of it to see how our social services and even our social workers cater to the birth parents like they are the victim. I thought this poor kid being exposed to drugs was the victim...
So they want me to drive Shane out to the ghetto to his birth moms house and my question is why?? Isn't this just giving the birth mom who is supposed to be proving she can take care of herself and this child another easy way out? Who cares if she has to take a bus and a train to see him. She put herself in this situation, no? And I will say that if anyone is wondering if they should do foster care I say no! This system treats foster families horrible. I say shame on you California for the reunification process. If these parents who neglect, expose to dangerous situations, and mistreat these poor kids and then you want to reunify them with their parents just because she said she did a parenting class how is that showing they are off drugs or have changed their ways? If I disclosed the things our birth parents do that are still showing they are not fit and you disregard it, what is your problem? What is wrong with our legal system? Why is it embracing reunification when the parents are absolutely
unfit? Just called me frustrated...

Our little guy

These two have become buddies. Cody can make Shane laugh harder than anyone. And Shane will look at pictures of Cody around the house and get a big smile on his face. It's absolutely heart warming to see these two interact together.

Little ones from above

I apologize for those reading, our computer died a couple of weeks ago so I can't post any pictures right now but we have become foster parents through an agency that works with the county. On Friday we were at knotts berry farm and I received a call telling us that there was a 4 month old baby named Shane who needs a home to stay at. They needed someone that night, as in a couple of hours. We gladly took the opportunity and we have sweet little Shane in our home. It's been awesome. We don't know much at all about his situation and why he was taken from his birth parents but we don't really need that info to fall in love with him. Shane loves Cody and its reciprocated. Cody can make him laugh harder than anyone else has been able to. It's been so cute to see Cody interact and do silly things to make Shane laugh. We appreciate our families and friends who have given us things and have been so open to Shane. But really, who couldn't love a baby?? We hate to wish harm or ill things towards his birth parents but we really hope he can stay with our family forever. He is an angel from above and I know as long as he is with us he is safe and loved.

Our October 2012

This past month has been a busy one. To start off Daniel passed his testing and academy training to become the fire engine's engineer. So watch out, he will be driving the engine and trucks now. He is just waiting for a position to open up or someone to retire which will be soon. It's just a waiting game at this point...as are so many things in our life right now. 

 Next, Cody has been involved in Cub Scouts for a few months now. They had their annual rain gutter regatta competition. Cody did very well. He lasted pretty far into the competition. His cousin ended up winning. 

 And of course we carved pumpkins. We ended up having a few extra pumpkins due to a camp out the boys went to where they didn't use their pumpkins there. Cody hates cleaning out the pumpkin but he did really well carving his own pumpkin this year. 

 We spent Halloween night with the neighborhood families. It's kind of a tradition of ours. These are a couple of the boys. Cody was a ninja this year but he wouldn't wear the mask/head covering. 

 The last stop was Grandma Titel's house. Since she lives so close the whole gang came along. 

 My exciting event was our annual ward craft night. Autumn and I planned the whole thing. There were 4 crafts and a lot of painting on our part but fun was had by all. We had a good turnout and everyone enjoyed the crafts and socializing with each other. 

I have the Relief Society Christmas party in 5 weeks. I've been able to get some good people on my committee so I am sure all will go well. I will be pleasantly stressed for the next month as the Relief Society Christmas party is the biggest event of the year. No pressure of course!  :) This is a busy time of year for everyone. We are debating on a trip to Utah for Thanksgiving. We still haven't decided. 

The day that still brings tears to my eyes

Remember all who lost their lives that day!