Foster care blues

Most of you know that Daniel and I are doing foster care right now. We have an awesome little guy who just turned one. We have had him since he was 4 months old. Since we have had him, we've seen him sit up, crawl, walk, say mama and dada and much much more. He has been a joy to have in our home. He is finally in a stable home with a mom and dad to give him the necessary love and needs he requires. So why am I writing about this?
Today is Shane's first visit with his Mom without Daniel or I there with him. Talk about stress and anxiety. Foster care is not for the weak. We (more like i've) have really had to put my controlling cap on lately. We are dealing with an 18 year old woman who wants her son back but will use manipulation to make you feel sorry for her. And when she doesn't get her way, she throws a fit, just like a child. Should I be mad...yes, but really when we take a look at this young woman's life she is really doing this because it is how she survives through life. It's the only way a girl who grew up without a father knows to act to get attention.  It's so frustrating to witness this and then on top of it to see how our social services and even our social workers cater to the birth parents like they are the victim. I thought this poor kid being exposed to drugs was the victim...
So they want me to drive Shane out to the ghetto to his birth moms house and my question is why?? Isn't this just giving the birth mom who is supposed to be proving she can take care of herself and this child another easy way out? Who cares if she has to take a bus and a train to see him. She put herself in this situation, no? And I will say that if anyone is wondering if they should do foster care I say no! This system treats foster families horrible. I say shame on you California for the reunification process. If these parents who neglect, expose to dangerous situations, and mistreat these poor kids and then you want to reunify them with their parents just because she said she did a parenting class how is that showing they are off drugs or have changed their ways? If I disclosed the things our birth parents do that are still showing they are not fit and you disregard it, what is your problem? What is wrong with our legal system? Why is it embracing reunification when the parents are absolutely
unfit? Just called me frustrated...