Dear doGfather, Who Art In Heaven

"Please make the puppies go bye bye."

Well Wootie Bear, your prayers have been answered.

This weekend, Mona and her pups are going to their new foster home for the remaining three weeks of puppyhood. Their new foster home is big, and has a yard, and three kids to play with and socialize the pups. It's a so much better situation for them. I'm happy-sad. For all the stress that's been inflicted on my household, these little piggies will be much missed.


Oops! Shit, sorry.

I meant these little piggies:

I weighed the pups tonight when I dewormed them. Cindy is the most wee at just about 5 lbs and Oliver is the largest at almost 7 lbs. Bobby looks bigger than Oliver but he is fluffier and weighs a little bit less. They sure are fat and sassy little guys!

Remember when they looked like this?

Puppies, 24 hours old

Wow.

Rest assured, there will be more puppy photos. I will be making the trek out to Delta every weekend to take photos and check on my little monsters as they grow.

My floofy woofy Bobby boy

Itsy Bitsy Feisty Cindy

Big Ham Oliver

Mr. Merley Mike

Even Miss Mona, Perpetually Hungry Single Mum

And as you can tell by Tweed's body language, he's just so, like, depressed that his favourite buddy Mona is leaving. Not.


I haven't broken it to him that his humpables are going with her.

Oh You've Got Blue Eyes ...

Oh you've got grey eyes ...


Actually, ALL the pups have blue eyes. And by "all" I mean all puppies everywhere. But Marsha and Mike have blue-blue, sky-blue eyes. That means when the other puppies' eyes turn brown, Marsha and Mike's will remain blue.

Mike did not cooperate with the photo shoot as he was asleep. Which is GREAT! I *love* it when they are asleep, as it no longer happens often enough.

You can't tell from this horribly unflattering photo, but Marsha is going to be a knock out.

All of the puppies, in fact, are very attractive little dogs.

Big boy Bobby

Squealy, AKA Picasso

The time of puppy dominated photo blogging is rapidly coming to an end. And I don't mean in the grand scheme of things, I mean this in a most literal sense. I am actively looking for an alternate foster home for Mona and her babes now.

The puppies are 31 days old and are outgrowing my apartment. I've expanded their xpen area by another third but can literally make it no larger - it's now an obstacle course to access my kitchen and I'm practically sitting on them while I type this. And whenever I type, I'm almost sitting on my bed as it is. In other words, this town ain't big enough for the (nine) of us.

Raising puppies is a lot of work when, as my good pal Mike pointed out, you do it properly. These pups are heavily socialized by my friends and family and me. I spend a lot of time interacting with them and otherwise trying to make sure they are well adjusted. I rotate their toys daily and introduce them to something new every day. But there are only so many hours in a day and too many of them are devoted to the puppies for me to get on with life. And surprisingly, life takes up a lot of time as well. My own dogs are suffering from a lack of attention and time and I am suffering from a lack of sleep. Cookie Uncle helps me out by exercising my dogs, and Auntie Jody helps me out by coming in mid day to feed and play with them. But I still feel like I'm not doing enough and that the pups deserve more.

I've really enjoyed sharing the growth process with you all! But blog fodder is not a good enough reason to keep these pups crammed into my small living space if there is an alternative for them.

If you are in the Vancouver area and think you might be interested in taking Mona and puppies home for the next 4 weeks, please email me and we can chat!

See? SEE?? I told you!!!

What do you think this could be?

It could be puppies exploring my apartment. It is, in fact, puppies violating my office chair!! And who's in that photo, humping merrily away? It's Picasso!! Bastard. Pervert. What kind of puppies am I raising?!?

Before we go any further, I want you to hold up your right hand and repeat after me:

"Food Lady is insane (in a good way). Food Lady has 12 dogs in her 400 square foot apartment. Food Lady is raising rescue puppies, running a dog rescue and is forced to live with Tweed 24/7. She takes the dogs to the beach almost every day. She takes lovely puppy pictures for us almost every day. I therefore will not judge her for the obscene amount of sand on her floors. Sweartogodamenbrutha."

Okay, we're good. I didn't vacuum and sweep until *after* puppy playtimez.

Ladies and Gentleman (Yeah, just one gentleman. I assume it's only Cookie Uncle representin' for the boyz) we have little dogs.

Not potatoes, real live little dogs. Look!

We had a playdate. In just a couple of days, it has become play for 25 minutes and sleep for 45, then repeat. I'm thinking of starting them on heroin or some other kind of downer.


"Yum. Flesh."
^^ takes after Donut!!

Tweed passes on more perverse secrets.

I'm annoyed that I screwed up the focus on this one because it's such a pretty shot - or it would be, even with the trashcan in the background. If you really loved me, you'd pretend the puppy was in focus too. kthanx.

Besides, I make it up to you with heart tuggers like this:

That's Cindy. Appropriately, given the Brady Bunch theme, she is the most wee puppy in the pack. And she is so SO social. She toddles around after me wagging her tail like mad. She's a feisty little girl with lots of sass. She reminds me of someone ... oh. right. me.


And for Rainy ...

Marsha Marsha Marsha!

And now for something completely different

Angry Donut Versus Mr. Woo

I should have mentioned this in the video; thanks Anonymous for reminding me!

The music I used is a song called Feel Good Inc. by a trip hop band called The Gorillaz.

Check 'em out!

26 Days Later

Attack Of The Zombie Puppies
Poor Piper. Piper has no love for puppies. She is terrified of them - as the only other female dog in the household, can you blame her? Mona, young single mother, has scared Piper straight. She will remain a blessed virgin until she dies. Frankly, I might too.

The pups are almost 4 weeks old (wow!) They now play for 15 minutes and sleep for 3 hours; repeat ad nauseum . Mona is always begging to get out of the pen for some time away from her brood. She doesn't do anything except go somewhere far far away and lie down.

But she's a good mama, and she can't stay away for long.

It's too cute for mere words.

Have I mentioned the puppies have teeth? Ouch. No body part is safe, and I leave that to your imagination, but will say some bite marks are difficult to explain.

What does concern me, a bit, is the inappropriate Tweed-and-puppy relationship. Not because Tweed has done anything inappropriate to them (reformed??) but rather because he seems to have taught them something inappropriate. It is normal for not-quite-four-week-old puppies to hump ... me? My feet? My arms? How about computer chair legs? Normal? Blech. I did not record that for posterity, as I can't photograph that and jump up squealing "EEEEWWWW! GROSS!!!" at the same time.

Cookie Uncle had a puppy party at my house while I was off getting frostbite at agility class last night, and he and his friends tell me the original humping puppy was Picasso.

Picasso is NO LONGER MY FAVOURITE!!! Sorry Picasso.

They are even starting to look lascivious.
I like romping rolly polly fuzzy wuzzies, but I like 'em sleeping too. Mostly cuz they are easier to photograph that way.

Marsha nestled against mum

Mike takes a snooze

Mike and some of his difficult-to-tell-apart siblings

But you have to admit they are VERY cute awake as well, especially since it's so brief.

Another of Mike and his sibling checking out the world outside the pen

Oliver and his brother

You could die, right? Look at the tri colour!

So thanks again for all your generous donations. I still can't believe how kind you all are. I just don't understand why no one offered to take all the puppies ... they come with cash!!

In 4 more weeks, we will be looking for foster homes for the pups to go to while they recover from their neuters and dewclaw removals, until they go on to their real forever homes. If you're interested in fostering one of Mona's famous puppies, please visit our fostering page for more information!

Fat and Happy

Thanks to all of you

Holly wrote:

I just really enjoyed reading through your blog. You’ve captured both the look of your kids and their personalities. I’ve passed on your website to a friend with a border collie and we were exchanging quotes from your website and laughing. I think my favorite is the dog trying to get the treat of the table. Priceless.

And I never realized that merles should not breed. So I’ve learned something new!

Anyway, I’m making a donation. I did a bit of volunteer work in Toronto while I was there and I am so impressed with what you’re doing.

Laura wrote:

Thanks for the updates and great pics on your blog, I have a great time reading it and I'm another Woo fan amongst so many! Anyway, I sent some $ to help feed the hungry buggers, I'm glad you posted the paypal stuff.

Good luck with them and keep the pictures coming,

The following folks did not leave messages, but we'd like to thank them anyway:

• Anne-Marie, Kristin, Sharon, Kelly, Pia, Fern, Janet, Lynne, Robin, Rainey, Helen, Jacqui, Rossie, Erin, Saskia and Alison

Not to single any one of you out but HOLY COW Andrea, thanks so much! That's crazy!!

Thank you for your generosity!

Puppy Speak

"I wish I were big."

"There's a dog in here that looks *exactly* like me! Except it's wet."

"OMG! Look at the size of those BOOBS!!"

"Mmmm. Yummy Mummy."
(okay, I went too far. I apologize)

The puppies are now 23 days old and they are speaking ... loudly and often. And inappropriately, like at 3AM. I predict many sleepless nights ahead.

So I'm an (cover your kids' eyes and ears please) asshole. Yesterday was my birthday, yes, but it was also the birthday of Piper and Mr. Woo. Since they were both rescues without exact birthdates, and since they were both born approximately in November, I shared my birthday with them so I wouldn't forget the date. That worked well, no?

Poor Woo searches for the esteem in which I once held him, pre-puppy.

Piper searches for ... the ball.

Mona searches for a napkin (she drools on herself)

She's in great shape, or would be if she were not nursing puppies! She is still eating three times what my dogs eat, and also finishing two or three puppy meals a day as well, and she is skinny as a rail.

We'd like to send a shout out to Carmi who donated a generous amount of money toward Mona and the Brady Bunch's care via paypal!

If you're interested in helping us feed Mona and the puppies, who are now consuming approximately $9.oo of food per day please feel free to make a donation! We raise our rescue puppies on a raw food diet to ensure maximum nutrition and naturally healthy immune systems. It costs $2.00-$3.00 a day to feed the average border collie. As the pups continue to thrive, their food intake will increase to approximately $15.00 per day for the litter! We appreciate your help!

It's hard to believe how fast these babes are growing. Compared to Mona, they still look very very small
but they have tripled their birth weight. It is difficult to hold a puppy in one hand, whereas when they arrived you could fit two or three in your hand easily. Cookie Uncle would not want one to tinkle on him now!!

Every day they become a little more mobile. They still sleep more than they do anything else, and they frequently fall asleep in the middle of whatever it was they were doing. But while they are awake they are very active. Wrestling has begun:

They are agile enough to do things like scratch themselves.

And they are really starting to notice their surroundings.

I confess I have a favourite. It has changed day to day as they grew, but for the past few days it has been Picasso, formerly known as Peter. I don't know why, but his funny little face just speaks to me.

Other interesting things about the puppies:

Marsha and Jan are both tri-colours. Jan's tri is a very pale peach, while Marsha's is more pronounced. The rest appear to be merle or white and merle, except, you know, for Oliver. Bobby is a half size bigger than all of his siblings and has enough extra skin to make an eighth puppy!

The sad news is that it looks like there are or will be vision and/or hearing problems with Marsha and Mike. Marsha's second eye is smaller than the first one that opened, a condition called microphthalmia. This is common in homozygous breedings which means whoever planned or allowed this litter is a VERY BAD PERSON. Mike and Marsha are both deeper sleepers than their siblings which might suggest they do not hear as well, or at all. I do hope there will be adopters out there who are willing to take on the special needs puppies.

Red Dog thinks it's just great. If they can't hear him coming, they won't run. And then he can kill them, and eat them.

Tweed also thinks it's great, because if they can't hear him coming they won't run, and then he can ... molest them. It's SICK!!!

Happy belated Birthday Woo and Piper!