Tick tock, tick tock

Where does the time go?

Can you believe this strapping young lad:

Was once this little guy?

Zomg, Ryan, you got huge!

What?!

Waaaah!! My lost youth! Woe is me.

I guess I've got puppy growth on the bean today, as I ponder what this little feller is going to look like one day.

Since this photo was taken, I'm told his white bits are getting all freckly!

I know you are all VERY excited to watch Spike-o-saurus grow up, but I gotta tell you, I'm afraid!! It has been a really looong time since I raised a puppy (and that puppy was Tweed, which doesn't give me a lot of confidence!) and I've forgotten everything.

But you have been craving a puppy forever, Food Lady! No I haven't - I mean, I have, but I crave puppies in the abstract. Cutiepie wiggly fluffy butts. Not peeing, pooping, chewing no-training machines. Eep.

So you swapped Maeve for a little puppy. You suck. Maybe I do suck, but I assure you, there was no Maeve swapping going on here. I love my Miss Maeven, and she is pretty much exactly the age I would *prefer* to adopt ... because I'd much rather have an idea of a dog's structure, temperament and drive than the unknown of a wee puppyblob. I prefer a little training, an attention span, the Oscar-winning bonus of being HOUSEBROKEN and sleeping through the night. Maeve is SO MUCH WIN. Young adults are a million times better than puppies. You just remember I said that the next time you go looking for a dog to adopt.

Liar. You were going to adopt Spike all along. Nope, I really wasn't. I *heart* the whole litter of pups - again, in the abstract. I loved going to Hilary's house, smergling puppy bellies, and then going home to my well trained* adults. I was not in love with any one puppy. And Spike really was the litter leftover - we received over 100 applications for this litter and exactly zero of them were for Spike. I'm not sure why, but I hope I can raise him right and make all 100 of those people feel like they made a big mistake! (actually, I only want to make 93 of them feel like they made a mistake - the other 7 adopted his siblings, so by default I automatically love those people. They're family now.)

*Woo excepted.

Do you know what the temperament tester said about Spike?

BIG PERSONALITY.

Oh boy. What have I done?

I should've just kept Maeve! Although after today's mud splattered outing, perhaps not too.

What?

Miss Graceful did a faceplant into 6 inches of mudpuddle. And you wonder why she wouldn't make a great agility dog?!

Ridiculous. It was just a little mud. Stupid, fussy, fastidious Food Lady.

It's the worst time to get a puppy too - smack in the middle of my move, no money, no job, right on the heels of Miss Maeve, who leaves 24 hours before Spike arrives ... ugh.

I just hope it doesn't stress the Big Dawgs out too much. They're already going to be sad that we are leaving behind some of our favourite places, like Bridgeman Park in the Fall.

Auntie Jody, did she just say 'no more Bridgeman?'

I just hope that bringing home a tiny humpable will distract Mr. T!

mmmm ... humpable puppy .....

Oh and have I mentioned that Mr. Woo HATES puppies?

Like this puppy, seconds before Mr. Woo informed him he was about to get his butt kicked clear across the Lower Mainland.


There are only 3 things in the world Mr. Woo does not like:
1) lettuce
2) being left behind and
3) puppies.

Great.

Anyway ... got any idea for a name for Spike? I've not come up with anything good for him yet.

And who wants to puppysit for me on Sunday evening, November 1st? My wonderful mum got us tickets to see David Sedaris in Vancouver for my birthday gift.

He's really cute! (Spike I mean, not David)

Do you notice how in EVERY photo of Spike, he is looking straight at the camera lens? Yeah, that might have had a little something to do with my decision ... :)

I left my heart

in Surrey.

(in Hilary's kitchen)

ZOMG! It's 7 week old Linus! Who has been adopted - not by me, sad to say.

(insert pouty face)

Aren't they humungoid now? Puppies grow obscenely fast.

Charlie, the heartbreaker

Lucy, Diva in a puppy suit!

The coveted, but adopted, Patty

Her mother's daughter, Sally.

"Eff-You Camera" Schroeder.

And the irrepressible Spike AKA Mr Personality!

For some reason, I completely forgot to take photos of Franklin (adopted), so I'll give you a second helping of Spike.

Gah. The cute. It's too much!!

But I guess it's a good thing I left my heart in Surrey, cuz that's where I'm moving at the end of the month!

This is my new home, dubbed "The Little House On The Prairie" by my (mean) friends.

That's my backyard, with an apple orchard and a fire spit for rowdy barbeques.

And this is TLHOTP viewed from the other end of the 10 (count 'em, TEN) acres my wee house sits on.

I'm officially movin' to the stix. Commence mockery .... now.

What do you think of that Rivet?

Meh. I can cover my nose with my tongue.

Miss Maeven was a little more excited for me, at least. Of course, Maeve is excited about *everything*

But I don't think Maeve will be coming with us. For this, you can blame Linda, mostly because it makes her feel guilty ;-)

As much as I adore her sunny personality and enthusiasm, and her simply adorable face, Maeve is built like a tube with 4 ramrod pistons for legs. She is a lovely dog, but she's not put together for the rigours of agility. Ten acres doesn't equal ten dogs, and my 4th and last addition has got to be able to play with me for a long time. It breaks my heart - I mean, it shatters it in a million pieces, you've no idea how much - but I just don't think I can keep her. She deserves someone who won't be disappointed that she can't be a sporty partner.

OTOH, today I hate agility so much that I might be inclined to change my mind. Again.

I guess every dog comes into your life for a reason. Perhaps Maeve came into mine so that I learn the valuable lesson of letting go of what I think I want, and holding out for what I know I want. Either that, or the universe is a big mean bastard with a sick sense of humour.

*grumble*

Fortunately, I have Tweed to lighten my pissy mood.

Oh hai, I'm in your lens, stealing your perspectives.

I'm going to go drown my sorrows in research on chicken ... brands? Breeds? Whatever, I'm gonna get me some chickens when I move!

Get off my land, city slicker

They don't even grow horses properly out in the sticks! Yeesh.

Can't take him anywhere

Vancouver's summer is bidding us adieu for another year, so we're taking advantage of the precious few nice days left to enjoy some swimming. Today we went to Trout Lake.

I was very excited when we got there, as the first thing Woo did was swim out to the Floating Log with no prompting whatsoever. "Yay!" I thought, "He remembers our last photo and training session!"

I should have been suspicious as soon as he gave me this look.

Because after sniffing up and down the length of the log, he then did this:

WTF? Why me? Why do *I* have the ONLY dog in the world who takes a crap on a floating log, in a lake, surrounded by grass?

Yay! I have humiliated The Food Lady! Off to find something else to do!

OMG don't make me get on this thing. I saw what Woo did!

*sigh* I hate you.

But I WUV you! Did you see me take a dump on that log? LOL!

He's tainted the whole lake. Yuck. I feel dirty.

Piper missed The Great Log Incident of '09 because I was holding the bag of tennis balls, and she was doing this:


It's a good day to be alive.

What? What? What did Tweed just say? The lake is tainted??

Oh dude. So gross. I don't think I should get in here ...

She eventually jumped in, but Log Dog was waiting for her.

(*cue JAWS theme music*)

Come 'ere Piper, I'm gonna taint you too!

Gross! Get outta here Woo! You're disgusting!

(Poor Piper. Little brother suck)

I'm going to go play on the field, which Woo has not defiled.

Woo is a dirty dog. In so many ways! Last week we went for a hike with the very lovely Rivet.

It wasn't raining, and most of the route is gravel paths. Nevertheless, Wootie still ended up looking like this:

Who's a disgusting, filthy, rotten little stuffed pillow of a dog? Who is it? Who?

Me! It's me!

Well it's not me. So take your stinkin' camera and ...

TWEED! Language, mister!

Yeah, sorry. Whatever.

And we know it's not my pretty, precious little princess.

*blink, blink*

I'm feeling generous toward Piper these days, can you tell? I am very proud of my little snuggle snookums. In our agility class (you know, the one lorded over by The Sadist, who btw has taken up the habit of menacing us Stupid Humans with a broom, or a spare jump pole. It's ominous, because he's German, so he sounds scary even when he's happy) we have to do Very Mean Things, like run courses from the Worlds agility competitions and such. And last night in class, Piper successfully completed a challenging course, 20 obstacles without a refusal, without a bar down, without missing a contact etc. I almost threw a party for her, I was so pleased!

That's right. I'm da bomb. You may now refer to me by my new nickname, Greased Lightning.

You like her better than me now, don't you? I may as well just end it all, right now, on these train tracks. This photo is totally not posed. I swear.

Oh of course not Tweed. I love you both equally. And at least twice as much as Filthy Woo.

What? Come on, give us a kiss.
Blech.

Hello there. Excuse me? Can you help me find a Schnauzer blog? I think I may have taken a wrong turn somewhere...