Ghost Rider (2007)

Director:  Mark Steven Johnson

Writer:  Mark Steven Johnson

Composer:  Christopher Young

Starring:  Nicolas Cage, Peter Fonda, Eva Mendes, Sam Elliott

More info:  IMDb

Tagline:  Long ago, he made a deal... to save someone he loved... What he didn't know was the price he would have to pay...

Plot:  When motorcycle rider Johnny Blaze sells his soul to the Devil to save his father's life, he is transformed into the Ghost Rider, the Devil's own bounty hunter, and is sent to hunt down sinners.

My rating:  7/10

Will I watch it again?  No.

For years, I've heard nothing but how shitty this movie is.  It's not that bad at all (I watched the extended version).  It's not great but I found it fun and enjoyable.   The casting was great.  Nicolas Cage did a good job in the role.  His hair was obviously dyed jet black which never quite looked right with his face.  He would've been about 43 at the time which isn't old enough to make a difference.  Maybe it was the hair style.  Anyway, I though Peter Fonda as Mephistopheles was a fun choice considering his 60s Biker genre flicks.  And Sam Elliott as Caretaker was a brilliant move.  He uplifts every movie he's in and that scene with him and Johnny near the end was great where he's riding a fire-y horse.  It could've been stupid as shit but with These two guys in the role, it worked for me.  I dug the set-up, and even though the meat of the story wasn't all that bad, I still liked the picture.  I'm not invested in the comics so I've got no history with the character.  I watch these comic book movies cold.   The sequel sounds like a fun rid even though the IMDb rating is even lower than this one.  I'm not going to beat down any doors to watch it but I will check it out someday.   Look at the cast on that one!  Ciaran Hinds, Idris Elba, Anthony Head.  Unfortunately, composer great Christopher Young didn't return for it.

Justice League of America (1997)

Directors: Felix Enriquez Alcala, Lewis Teage

Writers: Lorne Cameron, David Hoselton

Composers: John Debney, James Raymond

Starring: Miguel Ferrer, Matthew Settle, Kimberly Oja, John Kassir, Michelle Hurd, Kenny Johnston, David Krumholtz, Elisa Donovan, Ron Pearson, David Ogden Stiers, Robert Gallo

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Our last hope rests with Earth's mightiest heroes.

Plot: An evil Weather Man intent on destroying New Metro City with a series of malevolent meteorological mishaps? Can the super-powered (and semi-employed) Justice League of America save the day? Or will New Metro be drowned in a humongous tidal wave?

My rating: 5.5/10

Will I watch it again?  No.

Yeah, it's bad but it does bring a little bit of entertainment to the table.  It was made in the hopes it would become a TV series but the internet says it was deemed too poor to even be aired here in the States.  It's corny and dumb and it's obvious that everyone was in on the joke.  So take off your judgment glasses and try to enjoy it.  It looks like the filmmakers had some hurdles to overcome like a low budget and restrictions on which DC characters they could and could not use.  But you do get The Green Lantern, The Flash, The Atom and Martian Manhunter.  The others might be DC characters but I wouldn't know.  As far as I can tell they were made up.  The story is OK at best, the acting is serviceable, the music has some good moments you wouldn't expect in a production like this and there are some jokes that work.  The pacing could be tightened up in some spots.  That would be a big help.  The first few minutes tell you what you can expect.  It's not a moldy turd with a cape but it ain't smellin' pretty, either.

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (2010)

Director: Edgar Wright

Writers: Bryan Lee O'Malley, Michael Bacall, Edgar Wright

Composer: Nigel Godrich

Starring: Michael Cera, Alison Pill, Mark Webber, Johnny Simmons, Ellen Wong, Kieran Culkin, Anna Kendrick, Aubrey Plaza, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Ben Lewis, Nelson Franklin

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Get the hot girl. Defeat her evil exes. Hit love where it hurts.

Plot: Scott Pilgrim must defeat his new girlfriend's seven evil exes in order to win her heart.

My rating: 7.5/10

Will I watch it again?  Maybe.

Here's another on that I feel like it took too long to get to but I'm glad I did.  It's hilarious and creative.  I wasn't sure if I was going to dig it but it wasn't but a few minutes in that I was hooked and knew I was in for a good time.  The casting is great.  The humor is all over the place and I found myself laughing out loud.  It's got a quirkiness to it that's not for its own sake but it serves a purpose and with a sense of fun you don't find often enough.  I realize this is Edgar Wright we're talking about and that has a lot to do with it.  Post production must've taken a long time with all of the neat effects.  The pacing is lightning fast and the flick rarely lets up which leads to my only problem with the picture.  It's too long or at least it feels like it because the movie has such a high level of energy and it got to a point where I was getting a little exhausted.  I was loving what I was seeing but it was like playing a fun video game and just when you think you've about reached the end, you find that there are more bosses to beat but it's time to take a break.  I guess there's just too many notes...just cut a few, to paraphrase Emperor Joseph II.

Deadpool 2 (2018)

Director: David Leitch

Writers: Rhett Reese, Paul Wenick, Ryan Reynolds

Composer: Tyler Bates

Starring: Josh Brolin, Ryan Reynolds, Marena Baccarin, Zazie Beetz, Brianna Hildebrand, Brad Pitt, Bill Skarsgard, T.J. Miller, Terry Crews, Rob Delaney, Alan Tudyk, Julian Dennison, Lewis Tan, Eddie Marsan, Shioli Kutsuna, Leslie Uggams, Stefan Kapicic, Karan Soni

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Prepare for the second coming.

Plot: After surviving a near fatal bovine attack, a disfigured cafeteria chef (Wade Wilson) struggles to fulfill his dream of becoming Mayberry's hottest bartender while also learning to cope with his lost sense of taste. Searching to regain his spice for life, as well as a flux capacitor, Wade must battle ninjas, the Yakuza, and a pack of sexually aggressive canines, as he journeys around the world to discover the importance of family, friendship, and flavor - finding a new taste for adventure and earning the coveted coffee mug title of World's Best Lover.

My rating: 8.5/10

Will I watch it again?  Yes.

Someone: Who.  Are.  you?
Someone else: I'm Batman!

SPOILER FREE...

If you loved the first one, you'll love the second.  It's more of the same but they're not re-hashing old jokes (mostly) and when they do they're doing something different.  There are a lot of surprises and a shitload of laughs.  It does drag a little in the middle, mostly for the lack of funny, but that's my only complaint, if you can even call it that because it was still entertaining.  The new characters are fun and the old ones have some more fun stuff to do than the last time.  I LOVED the James Bond opening credits complete with the Celine Dion ballad.  I LOVE that song and I hope it gets nominated at the Oscars for Best Song.  It's really a well written song but with intentionally lame lyrics and it fits the Bond-style titles to a T.  There were a lot of things that caught me off guard but I was mostly struck when I found myself tearing up from the emotional moment in the last act.  It was really nicely handled.  There's also a BASIC INSTINCT moment complete with composer Tyler Bates providing a score that resembles Goldsmith's from that film.  I LOVED that little touch.  I'll definitely catch this again in the next week.  This was part of a double feature, back to back with the first film and it was nice to revisit it on the big screen.  It also helped reminding me of some of jokes because they continue in the sequel.  HINT:  one of them involves a lot of cocaine and the cure for blindness.  

Bathman dal pianeta Eros (1982)

Director: Antonio D'Agnostino

Writer: Antonio D'Agnostino

Composer: Ubaldo Continiello

Starring: Mark Shannon, Riccardo Zamagni, Guia Lauri Filzi, Sabrina Mastrolorenzi, Giuseppe Alotta, Ornella Picozzi

More info: IMDb

Plot: Sexually-obsessed Bathman (Shannon) and Klito-Bell arrive from the planet Eros and fight perverted criminals on Earth, such as prostitutes and rapists, in this outrageous Batman spoof.

My rating: 3/10

Will I watch it again?  No.

This is not the Batman porn parody you're looking for...or maybe it is.  I don't know you.  Bathman is pronounced as Batman, by the way.  This picture is 78 minutes long and it feels more than twice that which is the biggest problem.

But it looks like fun,right?  Well if you made a supercut with all of the goofiest scenes then maybe but I still have my limits.

The subs are fan made.  Sometimes it's obviously done for laughs but the subs seem to adhere to what is actually being said but with little tweaks here and there for comedic effect.

It's a porn parody so you get LOTS of fucking.  It's a little weird that most of the fuck scenes are so brief but there are lots of them and the movie ends with the longest of all that involves all of the heroes and villains in one giant orgy.  Even before that happens it's one setup for a sex scene after another with everyone fucking everybody else (except there's no guy on dude stuff).

The sex is generally OK at best.  The lesbian scenes fared best.  One of the problems is the music during the sex is usually goofy and played for laughs.  Hell, there's a couple of them that have pseudo Dixieland music for your fucking scene entertainment.  It doesn't work except for possibly being potentially funny.  The few decent parts are much better than their sum.  This was a struggle to finish.  I've done my community service and now it's back to digging for that rare gem among shit movies.

Watchmen: Motion Comic (2008)

Directors: Richard Zangrande Gaubert, Chris Gregory, Jake Strider Hughes

Writers: Dave Gibbons, Alan Moore

Composer:  ???

Starring: Tom Stechschulte

More info: IMDb


Plot: An outlaw superhero's investigation of a possible conspiracy against his colleagues changes all their lives even as evidence builds toward a horrific conclusion.

 

My rating: 8.5/10

Will I watch it again?  Maybe.

Man, this was great.  The score, voice acting, the whole shootin' match.  After having seen the movie a few times (which I love) it was time to give this a whirl.  Now I'm jonesing to read the comic which is pretty much what this is.  The only difference is someone else is doing all the work but it's a top notch production all around.  For those of you too lazy to read, give this five and a half hour show a go. If you have read the book then this will probably be a glorified curiosity but still worth a look.

Avengers: Infinity War (2018)

Directors: Anthony Russo, Joe Russo

Writers: Christopher Markus, Stephen McFeely

Composer: Alan Silvestri

Starring: Josh Brolin, Robert Downey Jr., Chris Hemsworth, Mark Ruffalo, Chris Evans, Scarlett Johansson, Don Cheadle, Benedict Cumberbatch, Tom Holland, Chadwick Boseman, Zoe Saldana, Karen Gillan, Tom Hiddleston, Paul Bettany, Elizabeth Olsen, Anthony Mackie, Sebastian Stan, Idris Elba, Danai Gurira, Peter Dinklage, Benedict Wong, Pom Klementieff, Dave Bautista, Vin Diesel, Bradley Cooper, Gwyneth Paltrow, Benicio Del Toro, Chris Pratt, Sean Gunn, William Hurt

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Destiny arrives.

Plot: The Avengers and their allies must be willing to sacrifice all in an attempt to defeat the powerful Thanos before his blitz of devastation and ruin puts an end to half the universe.

My rating: 9/10

Will I watch it again?  Yes.

SPOILERS AHEAD!!!  YARRRRRRR!!!

In a word...it's pretty fuckin' great.   In some ways it's more of a marvel that these people were able to make a movie involving nearly thirty main characters and giving each of them something to do that justifies their inclusion AND using them in a way that serves the picture as a whole without feeling like they got the short end of the stick.  Because this is such a huge film (part one and the conclusion coming in almost exactly one year) I'm just going to throw out some thoughts based on my first viewing.  The IMAX 3D is outstanding and it will be the only way I see it the next time.  I'm rarely impressed with post conversion 3D but this one blew me away.  It makes a difference.  There's a lot of movie here and they start off running and barely stop until the credits roll.  It's battle after battle with the final one being the biggest and heaviest.  A LOT OF PEOPLE DIE in this picture and that really surprised me.  But then again, I suspect that most or all of them will somehow return by the end of the next film because there are sequels on record coming out for some of these characters so there's at least that.  Some of their deaths have more weight than others (Spidey had me choked up something fierce - that kid is so damned endearing).

Thanos is fantastic.  Even though he's a psychopath, he's a psychopath with a legitimate and reasonable (to him) goal.  His motivation is admirable to a point but it is fucked up and there are better ways to handle his endgame.  This is his picture and Brolin knocks it out of the park.  It would've been nicer for him to be more sympathetic so that you could kind of root for the guy much like the two sides in CAPTAIN AMERICA: CIVIL WAR (2016).  But as it stands, it works well enough to get the point across and better than most villains in comic book movies.  We spend a lot of time with him and he even has a tender moment with Gamora which was a wonderful respite from the massive amount of action that fills the movie.  And everything from Thanos' finger snap to the end was excellent.  My only complaint is the forced humor which often didn't work or got in the way of the otherwise excellent flow of the film.  For example, as the monsters are at the barrier of Wakanda, T'Challa, his massive army plus a few of the Avengers, are making their way to stop them which begins the climactic battle for the final Infinity Stone.  Okoye and T'Challa have a brief exchange that goes something like this:

Okoye: When you said you wanted to open Wakanda to the world I didn't expect this.
T'Challa: Then what were you expecting?
Okoye: I don't know, a Starbucks or something.

Really?  Jokes just before their entire population is potentially about to be wiped out?  It's so out of place it's embarrassing.  That's just one of several moments where the comedy goes too far.  It's so bad that it's all too noticeable and often groan-inducing.  I'd like to know those responsible for insisting on this kind of bullshit when it wasn't needed.  Some of the humor works but the kind mentioned above rarely did.  It literally feels like there were moments in the script where someone just wrote in "INSERT JOKE HERE" and let amateurs fill in the gags.  It's just too fuckin' much, man.  Outside of that gripe, it's a remarkable achievement for these people to make a movie that juggles so much, give a lot more time to a somewhat sympathetic villain, to kill off a lot of people AND let the bad guy win.  The final shot of the film with Thanos sitting down and seeing his life's dream completed, with that smile on his face was so cool.  Of course all of this will change and he will be defeated because there's the sequel coming in a year but it's a hell of a way to end a super hero movie.  Oh, and my favorite super hero super moment was when Doctor Strange replicates himself many fold to battle Thanos.  I'm sure we'll find out in part 2 that he's THE reason that Thanos is defeated.  I can't fucking wait to see how.

Black Panther (2018)

Director: Ryan Coogler

Writers: Ryan Coogler, Joe Robert Cole

Composer: Ludwig Goransson

Starring: Chadwick Boseman, Michael B. Jordan, Lupita Nyong'o, Danai Gurira, Martin Freeman, Daniel Kaluuya, Letitia Wright, Winston Duke, Sterling K. Brown, Angela Bassett, Forest Whitaker, Andy Serkis

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Long live the king.

Plot: When King T'Challa returns to his home nation of the secluded but technologically advanced African nation of Wakanda, he is put to the test as both king of his country and Black Panther when he is drawn into a conflict that puts the fate of Wakanda and the world at risk. To defeat his enemies and protect his countries, the king must rally his allies and unleash the power of Black Panther.

My rating: 8/10

Will I watch it again?  Yes.

I can't find any fault with this flick...not that I ever look for faults.  It's just good all the way around.  There's so much about it that's refreshing to see and hear from the look, costumes, story, music, sound design, the works.  The MCU keeps getting better.  And after this and the latest Thor movie, the next Avengers flick had better deliver and not take a step back like AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON (2015).  The acting is solid.  Hell, I even teared up a couple of times.  It was touching.  Winston Duke had some funny moments.  He reminded me a little of Brian Blessed as Prince Vultan from FLASH GORDON (1980), so much so that I wished he'd gone full Blessed and run with it.  He would've stolen the show which is probably why he didn't.  Damnit.  The future tech was cool.  Somebody needs to open up a WakandaWorld so I can go hang out there.  It's beautiful.  Stan Lee's cameo is hilarious as usual.  I'm glad they didn't go full GotG with the comedy.  That would've hurt but there are some laughs and they're earned.  I'm looking forward to seeing Black Panther in AVENGERS: INFINITY WAR in a few short days.  It's remarkable how the creative team behind these flicks are able to manage/juggle so many wonderful characters.

It's a Bird... It's a Plane... It's Superman! (1975)

Director: Jack Regas

Writers: David Newman, Robert Benton, Romeo Muller

Composer: Charles Strouse

Starring: David Wilson, Lesley Ann Warren, Loretta Swit, Kenneth Mars, Gary Owens, George Chandler, Stuart Goetz, Danny Goldman, Geoffrey Horne, Phil Leeds, Harvey Lembeck, Michael Lembeck, Allen Ludden, Al Molinaro, Irene Tedrow, Malachi Throne, David Wayne, Lou Wills Jr.

More info: IMDb

Tagline: The funniest Superhero story ever!

Plot: TV adaptation of the campy 1960s Broadway musical about the Man of Steel, his friends, his enemies, and his self-image problems.

My rating: 4/10

Will I watch it again? Do re mi fa so la ti NO.

The story goes that this started out as a Broadway music in '66 that ran for 129 performances before it closed.  The reviews were pretty good and it even got three Tony nominations for acting.  Not bad.  So for whatever reason (money, anyone?) this TV special was filmed for everyone for all of future mankind to watch and, gulp, enjoy this piece of entertainment.  I gotta say, despite being painfully unfunny (the humor is wayyyy over the top), I laughed out loud a couple of times.  And now, just an hour later, I can't remember what was so funny.  The songs are OK at best and the singing is anywhere from great (Leslie Ann Warren is terrific) to bad (David Wilson struggles but powers through it).  You could make the case that Wilson was most courageous knowing that music is his kryptonite.  I hope he didn't die from it.  One thing I enjoyed was seeing A LOT of names and faces familiar to me.  I'm familiar and fans of literally half the cast.  Even game show hose Allen Ludden (I watched A LOT of games shows as a kid in the 70s) shows up as Perry White.  For that reason alone there was no way I was going to miss seeing this but it's not worth watching and it's often eye-rolling painful.  It's kind of funny that I had the LP of this decades ago and never once listened to it.  That pleases me now that I've seen it.

Dr. Strange (1978)

Director: Philip DeGuere Jr.

Writer: Philip DeGuere Jr.

Composer: Paul Chihara

Starring: Peter Hooten, Clyde Kusatsu, Jessica Walter, Anne-Marie Martin, Philip Sterling, John Mills, June Barrett, Sarah Rush, Ted Cassidy

More info: IMDb

Tagline: In Every Age And Time, One Of Us Is Called To Join The Battle.

Plot: A psychiatrist becomes the new Sorcerer Supreme of the Earth in order to battle an evil Sorceress from the past.

My rating: 4/10

Will I watch it again?  No.

This TV movie feels like it was made with the potential of becoming a series.  As history points out...it didn't.  Thankfully.  It's dreadfully boring.  There's drama, hospital drama, fantasty-ish drama, romance drama and then finally in the final third the comic book business moves fast enough for Dr. Strange to become his supernatural namesake and then he battles Morgan LeFay (played by Jessica Walters whom I didn't recognize, shame on me for missing that).  That's the big fight at the end and it's over all too quickly.  The whole picture is a ticket to Yawnsville.  It's not even good as a TV movie.  Apparently it aired against ROOTS (1977) and the ratings weren't good.  I can't imagine the ratings would've been much better if it aired against commercials.  Ugh.

Justice League (2017)

Director: Zack Snyder

Writers: Chris Terrio, Joss Whedon

Composer: Danny Elfman

Starring: Ben Affleck, Henry Cavill, Amy Adams, Gal Gadot, Ezra Miller, Jason Momoa, Ray Fisher, Jeremy Irons, Diane Lane, Connie Nielsen, J.K. Simmons, Ciaran Hinds, Amber Heard

More info: IMDb


Tagline: Unite

Plot: Fueled by his restored faith in humanity and inspired by Superman's selfless act, Bruce Wayne enlists the help of his newfound ally, Diana Prince, to face an even greater enemy.

My rating: 6.5/10

Will I watch it again?  I doubt it.

I don't want to spend much time on this so...  The bad?  It's got yet another bland villain (Marvel has them, too), the film is ridden with cliches, some of the dialogue is laughably bad, some of the humor is forced and feels a little awkward and dumb shit happens frequently enough to draw attention to itself.  The good?  Superman is fun for the first time in decades.  Jason Momoa was a blast as well.  Bruce Wayne's Batman inspired silver Mercedes was cool.  I was excited to see Ciaran Hinds in the picture but he plays the villain with little to distinguish his face, leaving only his heavily altered voice left for something to recognize which was tough sometimes.  It's brighter in tone and on screen than the previous three DC films but it's still much too dark.  It's almost embarrassing how much Warner's current DC films are lagging behind the success of the Marvel CU.  There were a couple of all too brief moments in Elfman's score where he gave us a hint of the '78 SUPERMAN and '89 BATMAN film themes.  That was nice but more would've been better.  The script felt sloppy at times and maybe that's the result of Snyder not finishing it and Whedon being brought in to finish it.  I almost don't care about this series anymore.  I only went to the theater (in early December) to see this because it didn't cost me anything since I'm on the Movie Pass but I did waste $5 on popcorn so there's that.

Thor: Ragnarok (2017)

Director: Taika Waititi

Writers: Eric Pearson, Craig Kyle, Christopher Yost

Composer: Mark Mothersbaugh

Starring: Chris Hemsworth, Tom Hiddleston, Cate Blanchett, Idris Elba, Jeff Goldblum, Tessa Thompson, Karl Urban, Mark Ruffalo, Anthony Hopkins, Benedict CumberbatchTaika Waititi, Rachel House, Clancy Brown, Tadanobu Asano, Ray Stevenson, Zachary Levi, Georgia Blizzard, Amali Golden, Luke Hemsworth, Sam Neill

More info: IMDb

Tagline: No Hammer. No Problem.

Plot: Imprisoned, the mighty Thor finds himself in a lethal gladiatorial contest against the Hulk, his former ally. Thor must fight for survival and race against time to prevent the all-powerful Hela from destroying his home and the Asgardian civilization.

My rating: 8.5/10

Will I watch it again?  Oh, yes.

Top drawer!  I liked the two previous Thor movies OK but the character hasn't really done it for me like the others.  He had his moments but that's it.  But when I saw the first trailer for this third installment, the one where Thor screams "YES!" when the Hulk shows up in the arena, I about lost my shit.  It looked like my indifference was about to change.  And it has.  This movie is hilarious, loaded with great action and great characters and it's fun as hell.  I LOVED it!  There's so much to gush about but I don't want to spend a half hour writing paragraphs that'll just sit here with me sounding like a giddy fanboy.  It's been a few hours since I saw it and I'm still jazzed about it and can't wait to see it again.  And how about Mark Mothersbaugh's wonderfully different with a nod to the 80s score?  Nice!

Thor is FINALLY fun.  I think this character has just been missing the funny.  Everyone does a fine job and I do mean everyone.  The humor is all over the place and all of the major characters get a few opportunities for laughs.  Anthony Hopkins had me in stitches when he first showed up.  Look for Sam Neill playing Odin in the stage play and Matt Damon as Loki (I didn't notice them at first.  I had to read about it damnit).  Goldblum is being Goldblum and he's glorious.  The end battle was good and Cate Blanchet rocked as Hela.  I want her back for more.  The story is great, too and the pacing couldn't have been better.  There's a lot in this flick and they pack it in with skill of a surgeon.  After having not seen the other Thor pictures since their theatrical release (and only seeing them each once), I think I'm ready to dust off the Blu-rays and give 'em a spin.  I'm definitely going back to the theater to see this again.  Wow! Just wow!

She-Hulk XXX: An Axel Braun Parody (2013)

Director: Axel Braun

Writers: Bryn Pryor, Axel Braun

Starring: Chyna, Gracie Glam, Alexis Ford, Jennifer Dark, Eric Masterson, Tara Lynn Foxx, Ryan Friller, Mark Wood, Alec Knight, Alan Stafford, Richie Calhoun, Shylar Cobi

More info: IMDb


Plot: Top attorney Jennifer Walters (Glam) and cousin to Bruce Banner (Calhoun) turns into a larger green chick.

My rating: 3/10

Will I watch it again?  No.

Is this what passes for porn parodies these days?  This is shit!  The non-porn bits are few and last maybe two minutes each which is probably ten minutes total.  There's literally no plot.  She's a lawyer that can't get what she wants for her client so she bangs the other attorney.  Next she's lying in a hospital bed not knowing how she got there.  A nurse sucks off the guard to her room and after the money shot, people try to kidnap the lawyer but she turns into She-hulk and escapes.  She-hulk goes to see the Sue Storm and Reed Richards of The Fantastic Four to help cure her but bangs Sue in the meantime.  Some dude bangs Madame Hydra and She-Hulk fucks Hawkeye.  The end.  There's nothing here.  The sex scenes (surprisingly sans music) are OK at best.  This is the first modern porn parody that I've seen and it's piss poor.  It was probably filmed in a couple of days for next to nothing.  The best thing about it is the idea of a She-Hulk porn existing.  You don't even get to see green tits!  Seriously!  You get some She-Hulk snatch but she doesn't even get naked!.  This is bullshit!!!

Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)

Director: Jon Watts

Writers: Jonathan Goldstein, John Francis Daley, Jon Watts, Christopher Ford, Chris McKenna, Erik Sommers

Composer: Michael Giacchino

Starring: Tom Holland, Michael Keaton, Robert Downey Jr., Marisa Tomei, Jon Favreau, Gwyneth Paltrow, Zendaya, Donald Glover, Jacob Batalon, Laura Harrier, Tony Revolori, Bokeem Woodbine, Tyne Daly, Abraham Attah, Hannibal Buress, Kenneth Choi, Jennifer Connelly, Stan Lee, Chris Evans

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Homework can wait. The city can't.

Plot: Peter Parker, with the help of his mentor Tony Stark, tries to balance his life as an ordinary high school student in New York City while fighting crime as his superhero alter ego Spider-Man when a new threat emerges.

My rating: 9/10

Will I watch it again?  Yes!

I LOVED IT!  This is the funniest of the Disney Marvel movies so far.  The action is great, the cast is top drawer, the music, story, the works.  I loved the emotional beats between Peter Parker and Tony Stark.  They felt earned.  When it comes down to it, despite the 133 minute run time, I could've used a lot more - partly because it was that damn good and I wanted to spend more time with the characters and partly because I would've liked to have spent more time character building. Tom Holland is fabulous as Parker/Spider-Man.  He's a lovable spaz.  I really dug how Tony Stark is branching out as a pseudo-father figure.  Captain America's bits are hilarious and what he brings after the credits had me howling.  And speaking of laughing, I lost my shit with laughter with Aunt May's line just before the end credits began.  My only head-scratching moment is the ferry scene.  How could that boat stay afloat when sliced in half?  I'll pay more attention the next time I see it.  Oh, and one more thing, I love what they did with Toomes, giving him a lot of humanity and a very justifiable motive for being the bad guy.  He's charming, funny and very dangerous and menacing.  Keaton is outstanding in the role and I wanted so much more time with him.  I guess that's the biggest compliment I can give is that I had so much fun I didn't want it to end.  I hope this movie makes all the monies.

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 (2017)

Director: James Gunn

Writer: James Gunn

Composer: Tyler Bates

Starring: Chris Pratt, Zoe Saldana, Dave Bautista, Vin Diesel, Bradley Cooper, Michael Rooker, Karen Gillan, Pom Klemtieff, Sylvester Stallone, Kurt Russel, Elizabeth Debicki, Chris Sullivan, Sean Gunn, Tommy Flanagan, Laura Haddock, Seth Lee, David Hasselhoff, Ving Rhames

More info: IMDb

Tagline: This summer, the galaxy won't save itself.

Plot: The Guardians must fight to keep their newfound family together as they unravel the mystery of Peter Quill's true parentage.

My rating: 7.5/10

Will I watch it again?  Yes.

I saw the first film in the theater and absolutely loved it.  A couple of months ago I watched it for the first time since then and the magic was gone.  I still liked it but it wasn't as fun as it was three years ago.  Anyway, what works in this film (like the first one) is the way the characters interact with each other.  Of the main group, Gamora is the least interesting character but at least she's involved with something more compelling this time with her sister, Nebula, that actually feels emotional.  I liked that.  It gets old having a character just be a tough badass.  It's not a home run for Gamora but it is a great start.  Kurt Russell is fun in everything and he's a blast in this picture.  I really dig the character and that plot line.  All of the secondary plot lines work well, too, and they all blend nicely with each other and conclude in a nice, reasonable manner.  Maybe the holes become visible on repeat viewings but for the first one, I was satisfied.

This has one of the best villains in the MCU so far and we're given enough information to know his motivations and whatnot but I really wanted to spend more time with him much like I'd like to have more time with all of the villains.  In this picture, it's not much more time than necessary to establish who he is and what his goal is.  Then there's the obligatory huge fight that concludes the movie.  Peter barely spends enough time with him to establish but only the beginning to what he shows to be a solid relationship.  He went through all of the different emotional stages over the course of a day (or two?).  That's fast even for movie time.  That's probably my biggest issue.  There are lots of really neat things to enjoy like Stan Lee's cameo, Stallone, Yondu's arc, and so on plus there's an abundance of humor from the GotG gang like there was in the first film.  It's a fun movie with some great ideas that get handled better than most comic book movies.  I liked it a lot and I may find that in time I'll dig it more than the first one.

Wonder Woman (2017)

Director: Patty Jenkins

Writers: Allan Heinberg, Zack Snyder, Jason Fuchs

Composer: Rupert Gregson-Williams

Starring: Gal Gadot, Chris Pine, Connie Nielsen, Robin Wright, Danny Huston, David Thewlis, Said Taghmaoui, Ewen Bremner, Eugene Brave Rock, Lucy Davis, Elena Anaya, Lilly Aspell

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Power. Grace. Wisdom. Wonder.

Plot: Before she was Wonder Woman, she was Diana, princess of the Amazons, trained warrior. When a pilot crashes and tells of conflict in the outside world, she leaves home to fight a war, discovering her full powers and true destiny.

My rating: 7.5/10

Will I watch it again?  Yes.

Great cast.  Really.  Everyone does a fine job.  I liked all of them.  Gadot carries the character well, Pine brings the funny and the fun, Thewlis is a blast, Wright kicks ass (I love that woman), Taghmaoui needs to star in a Sammy Davis Jr. biopic fast (he's got Davis's height and facial features like no one else I've ever seen) plus he's hilarious and a delight to watch, and I'm embarrassed that I didn't realize until now that Lucy Davis was in the UK THE OFFICE.  The action is good.  Say, how about that scene when WW leaves the trench and gets shit done?  Nice!!!  I actually got caught up in the emotional side which really surprised me...not too much, though.  The only things that bugged me were Ludendorff (Huston) having that super gas that made him stronger, Dr. Maru (Anaya) with a facial deformity (this stupid trope is over done but she at least has a legitimate reason for having it that is more acceptable than most movies these days) and that fucking horrible line when WW says to Ares at the end something like "It's about what you believe. And I believe in love. Only love will truly save the world." and then she promptly dispenses of him.  That was so fucking horrible. It's really just awful.  It's groan-inducing...at least it was for me.  Other than all of that, I really dug it.  It sucks that yet again a super hero movie fails to give much time to the villains but they give enough so that you know they're bad and why.  I would've liked more but they're just a means to an end for WW to come into her own.  I get it.  I wish it didn't have to be that way but I understand.  I doubt Warner Bros. will do as good again based on their track record but hopefully they'll learn a little something from making this picture.  Probably not. 

Batman: The Killing Joke (2016)

Director: Sam Liu

Writers: Alan Moore, Brian Bolland, Brian Azzarello

Composers: Kristopher Carter, Michael McCuistion, Lolita Ritmanis

Starring: Kevin Conroy, Mark Hamill, Tara Strong, Ray Wise, John DiMaggio, Robin Atkin Downes, Brian George, JP Karliak

More info: IMDb

Tagline:  The madness begins.

Plot:  As Batman hunts for the escaped Joker, the Clown Prince of Crime attacks the Gordon family to prove a diabolical point mirroring his own fall into madness.

My rating: 6/10

Will I watch it again?  Probably not.

Talk about a disappointment.  While I never read the graphic novel from (I think) the 80s, I'd heard a lot about it.  It sounded like a really dark and gritty tale.  So when I heard months ago that this was being brought to the screen with Conroy and Hamill back in their iconic roles AND that it was going to be rated R, I was properly excited.  Then I saw it.  It's OK.  When it came to delivering the grisly goods they only kind of went there.  For an R-rated picture there's no bad language, the violence is minimal and there's no nudity.  I guess it's only R for the adult themes...and to boost sales by slyly implying that it's going to earn it's adult rating.  Bullshit, I says.  I'd have to read the graphic novel to know where the film makers departed and expanded but the film they made feels like an extended episode for a late-night Batman animated series.  As it is, Batgirl has sex with Batman for the first, and presumably, the only time (which is fine but I'm not savvy on their history leading up to this point so I just have to assume that she's been hot for him for a long time and that he's totally OK nailin' a child or a very, very young woman) and then she spends the rest of the picture (until she's taken out of it) going through teen romance issues.  The Joker is the best part.  Hamill is outstanding in the role (as if he wouldn't be, right?) and he's the best part.  There was some great imagery but the overall film animation isn't nearly as smooth as you would expect for a movie, even though it was a direct-to-DVD film.  It looked like a rushed job you'd get from a TV series.  Maybe that's what they were going for.  I would have like more time spent on this project before making it this far and that's how the film felt, unfinished and needing more time and care to make into something ballsy, worthwhile and iconic.  The ONLY extra on the Warner Bros. DVD is a sneak preview of a new Batman video game!  Really, that's it.

Suicide Squad (2016)

Director: David Ayer

Writer: David Ayer

Composer: Steven Price

Starring: Will Smith, Margot Robbie, Viola Davis, Jared Leto, Jai Courtney, Ezra Miller, Jay Hernandez, Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje, Cara Delevingne, Joel Kinnaman, Karen Fukuhara, Ben Affleck

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Justice has a bad side.

Plot: A secret government agency recruits a group of imprisoned supervillains to execute dangerous black ops missions in exchange for clemency, which inevitably leads to chaos.

My rating: 6.5/10

Will I watch it again?  Probably.

Up until now the newly created, re-vamped cinematic DC universe has been weak and polluted with problems, mostly stemming from folks not knowing who these characters are so that they can create movies that respect them and make them fun.  They gave Supes and Bats their shot and now it's the bad guys' turn and it's definitely an improvement but not a home run.  There's a lot to like in this picture.  Robbie is great as Harley Quinn and should've been in it more.  It's Will Smith's Deadshot that gets the bulk of the spotlight and I liked him more than usual because he was more reserved and grounded.  Robbie's all over the picture but she shines the brightest.  The rest of the cast does fine.  Leto's Joker is pretty darn good.  He's not in it much so you get little moments here and there.  I think that worked fine for what he was bringing to the iconic role.  You'd have to have a REALLY GOOD story to support a Joker-centric film with Leto.  I'm not convinced that the current talent behind the camera (mostly the studio and suits that are helping to ruin these films) could make it work.  I'd still love to see a Joker/Harely/Batman movie.  There are some nice moments between Joker and Harley.  Really nice.

The biggest problem the film has is the rushed pacing of introducing all of the characters AND giving most of them their back stories.  For the most part we don't need to know their origins.  The result is an almost clunky presentation of introductions.  Sometimes it works.  THE DIRTY DOZEN (1967) is a primo example of how you introduce a lot of characters in a short enough amount of time that you get a real good sense of who they are.  Their traits are stripped down to the bone so that you know who they are without necessarily knowing why they are.  The pacing in SS is a mixed bag.  It's quick and there's a point where the action is almost non-stop and that's a problem.  The only real moment we as an audience get to breathe is when the squad takes a break and hangs out alone in a bar.  It's a great scene and it goes a long way in humanizing these villains.  Then it's back tot he action until the credits roll.  I know this is comic book movie and Ayer had one hell of a task of introducing all of these characters and then throwing them into combat (a-hem, THE DIRTY DOZEN) but there's something missing.  Expecting these villains (all strangers to one another) to not only fight for the good guys' cause but to do it efficiently and effectively as a team (which they surprisingly do on their own) is a tall order.  If you saw any of the trailers you probably thought that this was going to be one fun as hell movie that would hopefully make up for the poor Supes and Bats movies that came before it.  You'd be wrong.  It sort of does.  The trailers made promises that this finished film couldn't deliver.  It's entertaining but it's not nearly as fun as it could have been, should have been and what the trailers promised.  You should still see it.  There's a lot to like and you'll find it in between all of the jumbled scenes that are thrown at the wall in the first half.

The Punisher (1989)

Director: Mark Goldblatt

Composer: Dennis Dreith

Writer: Boaz Yakin

Starring: Dolph Lundgren, Louis Gossett Jr., Jeroen Krabbe, Kim Miyori, Bryan Marshall, Nancy Everhard, Barry Otto, Brian Rooney

More info: IMDb

Tagline: The Punisher will be coming for you, if you break the law!

Plot:  When Frank Castle's family is murdered by criminals, he wages war on crime as a vigilante assassin known only as the Punisher.

My rating: 6/10

Will I watch it again?  No.

OK, so here's how you have to approach this movie.  I didn't realize it until I was well into it.  The dialogue is ridiculous and the acting is all over the place but it's mostly over the top.  So if you watch this knowing that you're watching a comic book movie then you're ahead of the game.  If you do that then you might have a lot more fun.  When I realized this, that's when I just let go and enjoy it.  On that level it's kind of fun.  If you take it seriously then you're in for a major disappointment.  I've seen the other two films and I like them better but it's nice to finally get around to this one and put it behind me.  The Artisan DVD has a nice anamorphic widescreen print with the only extra being the fullscreen trailer.

The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (2003)

Director: Stephen Norrington

Writers: Alan Moore, Kevin O'Neill, James Robinson

Composer: Trevor Jones

Starring: Sean Connery, Naseeruddin Shah, Peta Wilson, Tony Curran, Stuart Townsend, Shane West, Jason Flemyng, Richard Roxburgh, Max Ryan, Tom Goodman-Hill, David Hemmings, Terry O'Neill, Rudolf Pellar, Robert Willox

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Prepare for the Extraordinary

Plot: In an alternate Victorian Age world, a group of famous contemporary fantasy, SF and adventure characters team up on a secret mission.

My rating: 6.5/10

Will I watch it again?  No.

I saw this in the theater and again recently.  Both times I liked it OK.  I don't have any major issue with the picture and I had a reasonably good time with the fun cast and their characters.  The story is alright.  It's not a great picture but I certainly don't see why it's so reviled and why Norrington gave up directing and Connery acting because of it.  I never read the graphic novel this was based on but it's the kind of thing that's right up my alley.  I'd probably really dig it.