be happy today

 so....everyone (besides brecken probably...) was sooooo grumpy during family pictures this year. it was freeeeezing cold, norman and i had argued about something right before (in true picture taking day fashion), grant literally cried in every picture.... you know...just normal things for family picture day... haha. but i wanted to share the rest of our pictures because at least brecken was cute!

but also i've been thinking.... gaining some perspective.... and wanted to write it down to remind myself of the important things in life. and i feel like i've talked about this before but i need the reminder time to time. so like i have mentioned before, we bought a house! and when you buy a house what do you want to do????? buy eeeeeeeeverything. i want to change this, and paint that, and get new couches here and new beds there and a dresser and a dining table, oh and since we have hardwood floors...gotta get some rugs, etc etc...the list LITERALLY never ends. so you go online to get inspiration for this new house and you see all these beautifully perfect homes. and you feel a little lame.... or start wishing you had something different... or more money to do what you wanted... or the creativity to make your home look "pinterest worthy" or "instagram worthy"... and sometimes i look at homes and the negative spiral starts.... and i'm like .. where is the reality here??? where is your garbage cans? and laundry baskets? or even stuff that your husband has and likes but is maybe not your taste and you can't get rid of it?? where is all that stuff? where is your mail? (is that just me that leaves mail laying around everywhere???) anyway... i just feel like it's not realistic!! and it angers me! and you know what?? it shouldn't. and that's what i have to remind myself. 

because you know what i have come to realize? i get just as clean in my older, not so modern shower as someone who does in a beautiful white subway tiled shower. and my food tastes just as good in my small little kitchen as it would in a big kitchen with a beautiful island. and i sleep just as good with my DIY wood headboard as i would with an expensive bedroom set. i have just as meaningful, inspiring, and memorable conversations on my old couches as i would on brand new west elm couches. my kids have just as much fun in their not perfectly put together toy room as they would in one that was. 

you get my point.

it's the experiences, the people, and the love in our homes that matter. and yes, i still want to make my home feel the way i want it to feel by decorating it the way i want to decorate... but it doesn't need to consume me or make me feel like a loser if i don't have everything i want all at once. and i'm cool with my house looking halfway put together until we can start getting those things i would like to have. but they aren't necessary to my happiness. my family is necessary to my happiness. dancing with grant to moana while brecken laughs at us in our living room with 4 different styles of furniture is what makes me happy, giving brecken and grant a bath and watching them splash and laugh and then drying them off with old bleach stained towels makes me happy, eating dinner at our TINY table on folding chairs with my family and listening to grant ask us funny questions and make funny faces while brecken literally eats his crumbs off the floor makes me happy, staying up late with my husband laughing at our favorite shows in our bedroom with clothes EVERYWHERE cause we don't yet have a dresser even makes me happy. 

those are what i need to hold onto when i feel that negative spiral start..... the envy.... the pride looking up..... i want those moments to be fewer between the good moments where i appreciate the truly great people i have in my life and our experiences together, until eventually, that envy and pride is gone and i am just truly happy with what i have and where i'm at. so here's to feeling happy today! and feeling grateful for what i DO have instead of coveting what i don't. 

a birth story...the most important one

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it's the first sunday in december. the sunday the christmas devotional is broadcasted by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. we get to hear messages about Christ and Christmas. it's always good. but lately i've been thinking a lot about Mary. what kind of girl was she? how would it be to ride a donkey allllll the way to bethlehem at 40 weeks pregnant... (technically we don't know if she was full term...but still...). what she felt when she found out she was chosen to carry and deliver the Son of God. how her delivery actually went....in a barn...with cows.....

it's hard to imagine.

i talk a lot about being a mom and the new things i've learned, but truly motherhood has changed me. so this year..thinking about the birth of our Savior...i think about Mary. i think about how overwhelmed i was to bring a perfect little baby boy into the world and how i was going to raise him. but mary...she had to bring the literal son of God into the world. the only perfect human that has ever lived. it had to have been overwhelming. i get choked up thinking about mary. thinking about the responsibility that rested on her. thinking about labor (for which i was pleasantly in a hospital for...with modern medicine)...and how she only had joseph! and some farm animals! i mean back then, the women helped the women give birth. and she had herself and joseph to try and physically bring our Savior into the world. she truly was an amazing. 

back to the christmas devotional. i was making some cookies when it started and the first speaker got up and what did he speak about? mary. and my ears perked up. he talked about her faithfulness. that she was obedient. that the Lord had found favor with her. wouldn't that be something. out of all the women in the world, that the Lord chose YOU to carry Jesus Christ. it is so touching. motherhood is an incredible journey. i have loved it so much more than i could have ever imagined. so to have been chosen to raise our Savior...i can imagine was what i have felt only multiplied.

anyway...this is a rather random post but i just am really grateful for an obedient girl who trusted in the Lord completely and who brought into the world our Lord, Jesus Christ. without Mary, there would be no Savior. 

we hear and read a lot of birth stories on these here blogs....but what about her birth story....His birth story. so this Christmas, along with remembering my Savior, i will remember Mary. thank you for your selfless sacrifice to bring to us our Savior, Jesus Christ...He who made the absolute greatest sacrifice of all. 

Merry Christmas, everyone. He is the Gift. (#heisthegift)

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a rut

do you ever have those times where you feel like you're in a rut? a life rut??? i have felt the need to blog about so many things lately and just don't have the words to write out everything i've been feeling lately. but we'll give it a go...

life is beautiful isn't it? the way it shapes you into the person you are? the experiences you have build on each other and you slowly become a new person as the years go by. i think it's so interesting to see people evolve. although, sometimes you create habits that are anything but flattering and you become comfortable in those habits and over the years they become a part of you. i had a bit of a "come to jesus" moment the other day when i realized that i had done just that. it was both disappointing, yet also a relief to finally pin point exactly what had been going on that was making me act a certain way. it wasn't something some would consider a huge deal, but it was something that i noticed affecting my relationships with those closest to me. it was great to finally talk it out with my spouse and work it out together. 

marriage is hard sometimes. it's something you have to work at all the time and i'm so glad i have a spouse that is patient with me. he isn't perfect, but he wants to work at it as much as i do. i love it when we really dig deep in a conversation and figure out what we can both do to make our marriage just a little bit better.

so back to that rut...i feel like i'm in a spiritual rut. i have a testimony and i know that what i have felt is true but like many things in life...you have to always be working at those things you want to last. and i want to recommit to continue my relationship with my Savior and with my Heavenly Father. i have many examples in my life of those who are continually working on that and i want to follow their example.

i guess being a mom has really made me introspective. i want to be so good for my baby/future babies. i know i won't be perfect, but i look at grant sometimes and just think, man...i gotta get my crap together. this is such a special little boy with such a strong spirit that you can literally feel. i felt it when he was born. and i have been trusted to raise him, to be his mom. my friend and i were talking the other day... we had babies a couple months apart from each other. we were commenting on how special they really are and how they just came from the presence of our Heavenly Father and i said jokingly, yes! they came to us as perfect beings and everything we do from here on out, as hard as we try, just taints them! now, that is rather pessimistic, and i did say it as a joke, but being a parent is daunting sometimes! it's a huge job and how i can teach him to do things i don't do it myself??

anyway....i guess i don't know if i have a point to this post other than i'm glad i am finally working out of this rut i've been feeling lately. i had a good talk with my husband to work toward a better direction in our marriage, i'm trying to get the hang of this mom thing, and i'm working on trying to grow closer and closer to my father in heaven. my dad always quotes someone...can't remember who now, but he said "we are not human beings having a spiritual experience. we are spiritual beings having a mortal experience." we all need a smack in the butt every once in a while to get us out of our ruts. i'm glad i finally had one. 

my "meet the mormons" review

this weekend i went with my family and some friends to the new movie, "Meet the Mormons." and let me just say that i LOVED it. 

i have read a few online reviews on IMDB about the film. the negative ones were of those not of our faith that were upset that this movie wasn't what they expected. they thought it would be learning more details about our faith, or even addressing some of the controversies surrounding our religion. as i read those reviews, i thought, no, the movie didn't really address the current issues people have with our religion in a direct way. what it did show was how those truly converted to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints live their lives by striving to be more like Him.

the movie took different LDS members from all over the world and showed how their religion affected how they act every day. what some people may not know, and what some of you DO know, is that our religion isn't just a "go to church on sunday" religion. it's a lifestyle. when you truly believe and have a testimony of our Savior Jesus Christ you do more than just go to church on sundays. These 6 people in this film are 6 excellent examples of those who truly have a testimony of our Savior and are trying to become like Him by serving others. what the film also shows is how keeping the spirit in your life can help you make decisions that can help other people. which is what Jesus Christ was all about. serving others and being completely selfless. 

no, it didn't talk about polygamy, or specifics on why we don't drink, or the fact that we believe in traditional marriage. but it DID show 6 people that put family and God first in their lives. whether you are a member of the LDS church, or not, if you are a follower of Christ and want to see a movie about those who are trying to be like Him, too.... this is a great movie to watch. it's simply a feel good movie. if you wanted something different or wanted more information about our church. we have already provided places for you to get your specific questions answered {mormon.org/look up the LDS missionaries in your area}.

so that's my review on the movie! i hope you all go see it! not only because it's an uplifting film that inspired me to want to do more, but also because all net proceeds are being donated to the American Red Cross!

hope everyone has a great week!

convictions and compassion

 

my husband and i were talking the other night about this quote and some recent events that I've been meaning to blog about it for months but, then pregnancy happened and that sounded a lot more fun to blog about.

 

and perhaps i haven't blogged about this for so long because it's a little bit of a tough one to blog about. i don't want to ramble or get off in a tangent of specifics and i keep writing paragraphs of nonsense and deleting them because i'm not quite sure how to say what i want to say. and honestly, the quote really says it all. it's so spot on and so accurate and i guess i just wish that people in this harsh, unforgiving, intolerant world of ours would take it into consideration before tagging those who don't agree with them as hateful, fearful, unloving or without compassion. it's infuriating that if someone doesn't agree with what you're doing or disagrees with an opinion it causes so much hatred. and i'm not just talking politics, or religion, or what have you. it just seems more and more to me that..... as a wise man once said...... tolerance is often demanded, yet rarely received.

 

so moral of my story is how about we all just put our big girl panties on {or boy panties....respectively} and start treating each other a little more kind and with a little more love, understanding, and compassion in a world where there seems to be less and less of it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

i'm gonna brag a bit...

i'm just gonna brag for a second about this boy right here...

so first of all....he's probably one of the most handsome men....ever. and now that we got that important fact out of the way i want to talk about something else i admire about this boy.

so first of all..i have a short story...an anecdote, if you will.

i was at work the other day and a lady came in to get her hair cut. well, it turns out that this lady is of little means, not quite all there {mentally}, doesn't have a car, and walks everywhere she goes.

after her haircut was finished she had a check but nothing else to pay with...and we don't accept checks of course. so she had no way to pay...as i'm watching this conversation between her and my co-worker unfold with a handful of people sitting in the waiting area listening, i lock eyes on an older gentleman...maybe 60's...and he immediately, without any hesitation, raises a hand and says "i'll pay for her haircut."

it was such a fast reaction...i doubt he even thought about it before he said it. 

my co-worker asked, "do you know her?" he replied with a "no" and the lady turns and refuses to take his offer. she explains that she is going to leave to get some money and come back.

 so she leaves...and is gone for probably an hour or so. the man that offered finally gets his own hair cut and at the end gives us enough money to cover the woman's haircut, like he said he would, and left. 

the lady comes back to pay and we tell her that it's paid for. she seemed almost bothered by this because she wanted to repay this man. she even said "well now what am i going to do?" and my co-worker replied:

"pay it forward"   

i loved that.

the whole situation brightened my day.

i thought about this man who without a moments hesitation offered to pay for the haircut and expected nothing in return.

i immediately thought of my husband.

norman is one of the best example of selfless service i have ever seen. every time we run into someone we know anywhere, after we're done chatting he will ask them if they need help with anything, and if they do, to call him. and he means it. he doesn't just say "let me know if i can help" to sound like a good person. he is a genuinely good person who wants to help everyone and anyone he comes in contact with. 

i'm not like this at all, guys.

that sounds really bad, but it's the harsh truth.

  a lot of the time growing up i was not excited about service projects. and sometimes when norman offers us to help someone move or feed them dinner or whatever it may be...i still whine about it.

recently, however, i had this amazing overwhelming moment of wanting to be that person that others can count on for anything. someone who can be depended upon and trusted. it was strong and it hit me like a jackhammer to the chest {in a good way?}. 

i'm just glad i have a husband who is the ultimate example of what i strive to be like. he gives me motivation every day. and i love him for it.

oh, and in other fabulous bragging news:

norman applied for a civil engineering internship at the city of pocatello. it was supposed to be for senior status only, but he applied anyway. 

it was narrowed down to 3 people to interview and he was one of those 3.

he went to the interview {looking dashing with his new haircut from yours truly} and found out the following week that he got it!

i was so very proud of him.

 

not only that but they are going to match his pay that he is currently receiving while working for the street department!

oh, the blessings we've received lately because of that boys good deeds. 

i'm one lucky woman.