Hallelujah

You didn't think I meant "Halllujah" in the sense of "God be praised" did you?  This is about something far more important that God - tights.  Yes I know God is the maker of humankind, if he exists in the monotheistic sense, but he doesn't (exist that is).

But to paraphrase the ontological argument.

• It is greater to exist than not to exist
• God does not exist
• Therefore anything that exists is greater than God
• A pair of tights exists
• Therefore a pair of tights are greater than God

So I am right to spend my Sunday blogging about tights rather than worshiping the LORD.  (If you think that argument is circular Google the real ontological argument).

Anyway back to AnnaSophia Robb. She didn't say I've seen the "The Joy of Tights".  I'm sure she does not know this blog exists, what she did say was:

"I've started to care a little more about fashion, I'm starting to wear a lot more tights now. Carrie wears a lot of tights."

Notice she didn't say I'm wearing tights all the time.  Girls only do this in the imagination of pantyhose perverts.

AnnaSophia's revelation came whilst filming the "Carrie Diaries" (The Carrie Diaries is an American teen drama television series. It is a prequel to the HBO television series Sex and the City and based on the book of the same name by Candace Bushnell.) The actress admitted to Us Magazine that she actually had a limited knowledge of fashion before being cast as style icon Carrie Bradshaw.

If you'd care for some of the wiki-pedia facts on AnnaSophia herself

"AnnaSophia Robb (born December 8, 1993) is an American film and television actress. She gained prominence in 2005 with starring roles in Because of Winn-Dixie and Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. She is also known for Bridge to Terabithia (2007), Race to Witch Mountain (2009), Soul Surfer (2011). AnnaSophia was born in Denver, Colorado, the only child of Janet, an interior designer, and David Robb, an architect. She was named after her maternal great-grandmother, Anna Sophie, and her paternal grandmother, Anna Marie. She is of English, Scottish, Danish, Swedish, and Irish descent.  AnnaSophia competed in dance and gymnastics for four and a half years, but quit in order to focus on acting."

So can you imitate AnnaSophia's tights style?  Or at least the retro style of AnnaSophia playing a young Carrie Bradshaw?

Well black or nude tights shouldn't be a problem.

White spots on black a bit trickier

White on white....

..or black on black

Let's see those dots close up

Now dots on pink(ish) tights is most difficult of all.  Little black dots on black no probs.

Maybe too many dots....

...a little calmer

Even getting pinky tights may be difficult

The main thing of course is not to slavishly follow anyone else's style, but to find your own Joy in Tights

And finally here's AnnaSophia as her self in opaques

We can all get hold of a nice pair of opaques

And really finally the original

Putting the Boot into Winter

With the coming of the wet and windy weather it is time to get into a nice pair of boots.

A chance to wear those nice boots Father Christmas brought you.

Blow Santa a kiss

And make his Christmas  by giving him a little up-skirt flash 

What kind of boots
By boots, I mean boots that will keep a reasonable portion of you legs warm, not the Doc Martin's you wore in the summer.

or even your funky platformed ankle boots you love.

• Ugg Boots.  If you must.  Shapeless and style less.  Easier to get away with if you are young.

• Boots with a flat heal.  I don't like anything flat.  But sometimes flats or virtual flats are the only practical footwear.

At least these are shiny

Boots with flat heels, good to stop you over-balancing if you need a pee in the woods

• Chunky healed and/or platformed boots.  Look better than flats, but easier to walk in than spiky heels, especially over uneven ground.

He likes her in boots

• Boots with stiletto heels.  Much sexier, much more elegant.  Good for spiking the foot of a guy you don't like.  On the other foot, tend to get stuck in muddy grass or uneven pavements.

• Lace up boots.  Can have chunky or stiletto heels.  Just a little bit slutty.

Slutty boots at work?  If your boss comes in now he will be ripping your tights open and doing you doggy style.

• Slutty boots.  Extra long so extra warm, and extra sexy.  And you could be offered some extra income by any guy who sees you in the boots.

Radio slut

• Wellies.  Only if snows, and then get some funky wellies and wear them with funky tights.

Frozen tits?

But what you should wear on your legs with your boots?

• Bare legs.  Ohhhh much too cold.

• Trousers.  Nice and warm but these hide your legs.  There are two ways to wear your trousers.
• Outside your boots.  Warm, but defeats the object, no one can see your boots.
• Inside your boots.  This gives your trousers that horrible creased look.

• Leggings. Nice and warm, but you might as well wear opaque tights and keep your tootsies toasty as well. 

• Hold-ups.  Warmer that bare legs, but the wind will still whip up your knickers and freeze your clit off.  Still sexier than trousers.

Good job she is not wearing hold ups

• Tights.  Tights keep you warm right up to the waist and they allow you to show off the shape of your legs.

But what kind of tights?

• Opaques.  The obvious choice: thick and warm.

• Patterned tights.  Mostly thick and warm like opaques but add more interest to your legs.

• Cotton and/or Wool Tights.  Warmest option.  Not being sheer they don't make your legs so sexy, but do at least preserve the shape of your legs.  And cotton stays fresher than nylon and Lycra.

• Sheer tights.  Obviously not as warm, but legs you show off your legs better.

But I cannot show much of my legs in boots

It's true that if you have good legs you can't show so much of them off.  But you can take your boots off very slowly and tease any guys watching.

Now guys, admit it, you find this lady taking off her boots such a turn on

Still cold in boots and tights?

Sit it the grate and get someone to make a fire.  You tights and tits will ignite nicely

Tights are the "X" Factor that turn Frankie on

When we saw a picture of blond Becca Hills who had a sex romp with X-Factor naughty boy Frankie Cocozza (should that be cock-ozza?) JoyofTights suspected that tights might have had something to do with it.  Becca was wearing super-sexy suspender tights.

Reading on revealed that our suspicions were well founded.  Said Becca from Ashford

""He was very arrogant — but he doesn't pretend to be polite. I was wearing tights which look like suspenders and Frankie obviously liked the look of them."

The sight of the tights obviously gave Frankie an instant hard on, because he couldn't wait to get into them.  Let Becca take up the story again:

"Then he just ripped one of my tights. I couldn't believe it. He said sorry — then just ripped the other one and said, 'At least they're matching now'."

Joyoftights wonders if Frankie just got a spontaneous stiffy at the sight of Becca's tights or if Becca had been leading him on.  Perhaps she flashed the top of her tights.

Or maybe Frankie has a foot fetish so she showed him her nyloned toes and soles

Anyway it had an effect.  Becca says:

 "He took his clothes off down to his Calvin Klein boxers and jumped in bed and said, 'Come on then'.

And what happened next was pretty hot and steamy

"He wasn't a selfish lover. He wasn't grabbing my hair or anything. But he wasn't sensitive. He's not very loving. We did all the positions. He was adventurous. He was skinny and bendy and flexible.  I felt like it went on for a long time and he had a lot of stamina."

Becca got good value from her tights then - even if they were ripped beyond repair.  (Now do guys prefer un laddered tights so they can rip them off or do those little holes and ladders encourage them to rip away?).  Anyway Becca's ripped tights would now be discarded on the floor of the small bedroom as she screamed with pleasure at Frankie's cock going in from all positions until finally groaned with satisfaction as his load shot into her.  (No I don't think Frankie is the kind of guy to shoot his load into a rubber!)

Look hard you can see a ladder on her left leg.  Guys would a little ladder encourage you to rip 'em off?  Nice boots :)

Apparently Frankie refereed to Becca as

"He said 'I bet you're a dirty little bitch'. It wasn't nasty, it was cheeky."

So if you want to be a dirty little bitch like Becca, try some suspender tights.  You could even  add a bit of fashionable style to your dirty little bitch act by going for polka dot suspender tights

Or for extra dirty little bitch look, some bondage type tights.  All guys like suspender tights not just Frankie

and maybe some girls too

But don't expect suspender tights to result in a long term relationship.  Becca says about the end of the party:

"Frankie barely said goodbye. He just waved. He didn't give me a kiss or anything. We didn't exchange numbers, we just walked away.  Part of me was sad but he doesn't want to get involved with a girl like me. It will ruin his image. I'm sad I'm never going to see him. I had a great night, I still think he's amazing and I would love to do it again."

Don't despair Becca guys will be queuing round the block for a girl like you.  But still if you a longer term relationship stick to opaques and then nude/tan tights like our Kate.

Nice respectable girls?

Another respectable girl?

But hey do you want a longer term relationship when you can be a lot dirty little slut?