Eczema!!

Ho'ea is five months old today! wow, he is almost half a year old! How time flies.

Last week, he started scratching his head/face more and I initially thought he was doing it as a sleep mechanism, b/c he would only do it just before he fell asleep. Well, then his cheeks started turning red, and then i thought he might be sensitive to the bath soap we'd been using (Kaua all of a sudden became sensitive at about 2-3 mos old...so I thought it could be something similar). But when we changed bath soaps without any improvement, and in fact, saw his condition worsening, I took him to the doctor. He was diagnosed with eczema last thursday.

The pediatrician (not his regular one....Kaiser will give you whoever is available to fit you in quick) recommended 1% hydrocortisone ointment and tons of moisturizer. That seemed to do the trick because that night, Ho'ea began sleeping through the night again (he had stopped ever since he first started scratching).

(OMG -side note, Kaua is watching sesame street - so I can have some down time to type - and elmo is on, his favorite, but they're discussing the weather and a tornado is depicted as a puppet and kaua is freaked out! He wants the tornado to go "bye bye" and he jumped and startled when it first appeared and even shuddered! Amazing...this isn't the first time he's seen this episode because we have it recorded for just in case emergencies, but its the first time he's reacted negatively to it. Wow, it really is true that when they watch the same show or read the same book over and over, they learn something new each time).

Unfortunately, the next day, Ho'ea started scratching again, but this time it was his scalp!!! I tried to apply the hydracortizone ointment and moisturizers to his head, but his hair is so thick, I dont know if I got it on properly. Anyway, it started getting worse again, and he even seemed to have it on his eyes and was constantly rubbing them, so I made another appointment today. (I did call the oncall advice line and spoke with another pediatrician over the weekend, who also told me to keep trying to apply the ointment and moisturizers to his scalp). Basically, the same pediatrician said there was not much more we could do....she suggested trying a dandruff shampoo, like Selson Blue, and referred me to the dermatologist. She also said that if I got desparate, I could try giving him 8 ML of benadryl (an antihistamine) (how I get 8 ML is pretty difficult, though, b/c I could only find liquid gel capsules of 25ML...but anyway) but that they did not recommend it to children this young. We talked about it as a last resort and the potential side effects (apparently, drowsiness is the only one, which is something that sounds appealing to me since he's having such a hard time sleeping). So tonight, I went to the store, purchased two additional types of eczema moisturizers, picked up some Selson Blue and benadryl and slathered them on Ho'ea. I have not given the benadryl and really will use it only if I'm desparate because I really try to adhere to the most conservative, less is more, approach to medications.

He's still scratching, but it seems less intense. *cross my fingers, knock on wood* I will still take him to the dermatologist when/if I get an appt. Not sure if they'll be able to do much more than I've already done (I did my google research - at the suggestion of the pediatrician at Ho'ea's first appt), but I want to make sure I cover all my bases.

Oh crap...he's up and crying.


And he's back down. (I'm typing this at night when he's sleeping, and he just let out a couple cries...but when I went to check on him, he was sleeping. This has been typical ever since the eczema came on....he wakes up fairly often, fussing, because he is so itchy).

Eczema is pretty awful. From what I've learned, this condition is common in infants and most of 'em grow out of it by the age of 2. (What, I've got a year and a half more left of this sad torture??!!) There is also apparently no cure, just different methods to help alleviate the itching and the scratching which makes it worse. Skin moisture (or lack thereof) is the key. Eczema runs in the family, and while DH and I dont seem to have it, I believe my dad had it and so did his mom. My cousin on my dad's side also said that her oldest daughter had it.

Ugh...it's awful to have your child suffer and you're helpless to stop it. I've been praying that God heals his condition and alleviates his suffering. My new year resolution is to get back closer to God. I feel like i've strayed over the past year or two, and I really want to rebuild/reestablish the relationship.

Ugh, not again....

Not sure if you remember, but back when I was pregnant with Kaua, my quad screen test came back with an increased risk for downs syndrome for him. We had an early level 2 ultrasound which put our fears at ease.

Well the same thing is happening again with this pregnancy. I tested again for an increased risk for down syndrome with this baby. Our numbers are 1 in 49! Seems small scary huh? With Kaua it was 1 in 77. Normal for someone my age is 1 in 500 and normal back when I was pregnant with Kaua was 1 in 714.

I'm flying to the big hospital next monday for the early level 2 ultrasound again. We're praying that all will be well as it was with Kaua. While I'm feeling somewhat of a veteran when it comes to this, it still is worrisome.

Thinking good thoughts.

Well, it's official...we're pregnant - Again!

Yuppers,everything went A-ok at the doctor's today. Little baby #2 (need to come up with a niickname like two-bbers, B2, or something...) is measuring 8 weeks exactly. Doc said b/c baby is measuring so close to my LMP, which is 8 weeks 3 days, that he's going to keep my EDD as 8/5/11, instead of the ultrasound EDD which is 8/8/11. He said the ultra sound is plus or minus 1 week in accuracy and when the US is so close in time to LMP, the LMP is generally the more accurate. This logic sounds good to me since Kaua came 1.5 weeks early when we used the ultrasound EDD.

So doc did a vaginal ultrasound. When he put that thing in there, at first we didn't see much, but as he moved it around, you could totally see a little blob, and then soon after you saw a little flickering which was the heartbeat. Doc was pretty cool and turned the screen so that both of us could see exactly what he was seeing at the same time. (I hate when they keep the screen facing away from you and make you wait to see anything, what is up with the secrecy? It is my lady parts afterall!) Anyways, Doc showed me the head and measured from there to the tail to get my EDD. He also showed me the yolk sac which he said was looking normal. He also showed me what appeared to be a slight septate in my uterus, which I remember my old OBGYN (who did the surgery for the septate) said I would still have, but that it wouldn't cause any problems with pregnancies. This new doc, Dr. K (who I LOVE!! very cool down to earth local boy, did his med school and residency in Hawaii and is from my hometown), said it almost looked like it could have been a bicornate uterus. Way too technical for me, but I think that means when the uterus is heart shaped. Anyways, he took one picture (just one??) of bebe 2 and gave it to me. I'll need to upload it later to share. Bebe 2 looks like a little gummy bear so far.

I didn't really ask much questions, bc hello, I'm like a pro now that this is my 2nd kid. duh! When the nurse asked me if I had the WTEWE book, I was like, shah, yeah, I have them all!

I'm such a pro that when doc asked if I had questions, the only thing I asked was about the drugs. There are rumors that the local hospital (did I mention, the ONLY hospital on this island) does NOT do epidurals!!! WTF!? People give birth w/o epidurals nowadays????? You've got to be kidding me. But, Dr. K, tried to reassure me. He said, they do something similar to my beloved epi, but it wears off in 2-3 hours. I was like, hellow, my labor with Kaua was 10 hours and I needed the epidural for the whole time!!!! OMG...we need a back up plan!! But doc said,we could do the "other thing" (I forget what it's called) twice and they've recently been giving epidurals but it all depends on if the anesthesiologist is working or not. Dr. K also said he's had less complications with option #2, then with an epidural. I'm still not satisfied and am going to need to give birth elsewhere somehow.

Anyways, I digress....we'll figure this out later..in 7 months perhaps. Holy smokes a mommy of 2 in 7 months.....what the heck was I thinking?!!! Kaua is a handful on his own. I cant believe I'll have two of 'em in less than 1 year.

Doc said there's no cause for concern for me, so I dont see him again for 4 more weeks...or Jan. 26. The appt was pretty quick and then i went and did my labs,where they withdrew half the blood in my body. Hello do you really need 6 vials of blood??? geeze, what's the poor kid going to live on?

So I've decided I'm going to go the ever "original" route of telling people by making Kaua wear a "I'm going to be a big brother" t-shirt. I just ordered it from cafe.press today...but b/c I live in boonieville, it's not going to arrive here until after the new year. (and I even ordered it on the fast shipping track).

My tummy is already kinda showing, but if you dont know what to look for, you'd think I just kind of went overboard on the holiday eating (which I did). So I'm probably not going to go "live" with these posts until after I get the shirt and have had a chance to have him wear it around friends and family. I wonder how many people will get it right away? I'd probably be one of those people who dont even notice the writing on the shirt. Lol.

Anyways, so yup, operation, grow this baby #2 is underway.

Today is a big day!

Today is a big day. Not only is Kaua 13 months old, but we will find out for certain whether he is going to be a big brother come early August. My doctor's appointment is today, at 9:30am. Of course, we will have an ultrasound to date the pregnancy. My mind is filled with excitement and anxiety. There are two scenarios, both of which i have previously experienced that could happen. I could see a beautiful squirmy gummy bear on the ultrasound, complete with heartbeat, or I could see nothing, an empty uterus, or an empty sac. I've been trying not think about this day, and only think positive. On the one hand, I feel pregnant. I've had some nausea, my nipps are a little sensitve, I'm always tired, my tummy is a little bloated, and I havent had AF since the end of October. On the other hand, I feel normal, the nausea is rare, the nipps haven't been sensitive until very recentily, the tiredness could just be lazy, the bloated tummy could be too much holiday eating, and just because AF doesn't come doesn't always mean you are preggos.

Well, I can only move forward. I will find out today what the deal is. I pray for God's grace and blessing.

Doctor's Appt made

Ok, so I made my first doctor's appointment. They dont want to see me until I'm closer to 8 or 9 weeks and according to my LMP, I'm exactly 5 weeks today. So my appointment is for December 27, 2010 at 9:30 a.m. I requested to see the OB one of my hula sisters is seeing. She said he's good, and I like that. So with that said, we wont be able to confirm this pregnancy until then.

I did take another internet cheapie HPT yesterday AM and it was still positive. But I did notice that they expired last month...so you never know. But today was the last day I should have expected my AF and so far she's a no show.

I'm still alternating between excitement about this pregnancy and anxiety. Anxiety more so that I'm not sure if we're ready for round 2. Anxiety that our plans to travel in September are now going be canceled. I cant take a 1 month old child traveling and there's no way we'd leave this baby at home. Ugh.

I'm still counting my blessings and ever thankful to the Lord for this tiny miracle though. It's all meant to happen for a reason.

9 months update

This post is a week or so late in coming but Kaua is 9 months old now! He weighs approximately 21 pounds and is 29 inches long. He's 75th percentile for height and 50th for weight. This has been the trend for the past two visits now, so he's been staying pretty constant.

This past pedi appointment, there were no vaccinations...you're thinking yay, no needles?! Yeah right!!! He had to get a TB skin test, which wasn't so bad AND a blood draw. Again, if it had been just a needle, it wouldn't have been so bad, but the nurse wasn't able to locate a vein in the usual spot in his arms, soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo she had to nick his finger tip and DRAIN THE BLOOD MANUALLY (think: squeeze his finger/hand so that blood dripped down and out) and fill TWO VIALS! OMG!!! Talk about traumatic (for me mostly, not him). He was a trooper for the nick in the finger and for a little bit of the blood dripping, but she had to squeeze his finger and hand for at least 1-2 minutes to get enough blood to fill the vials and boy oh boy the poor baby was screaming and trying to yank his hand away. I normally sing to him to keep him distracted and I clearly remember going through several stanzas of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star and Old MacDonald Had A Farm before she was through. It took sheer will power to keep my voice steady and not break out into tears. And I had to go through this all on my own, DH was at work for this appointment (Had I Known It was going to be BLOOD LETTING, I would have made sure he was off). But anyways, moving on.

The little goober is sure getting an attitude. He will definitely let me know what he wants and doesn't want and is starting to see if throwing a fit will help achieve his goal. These fits include tears, screaming, back arching and general difficultness. I've decided that when he gets like this (for no reason, b/c sometimes he does have a legitimate need), I simply put him down on the floor and let him continue on throwing a fit. I'm trying to find the happy medium between meeting his needs and letting him know that this type of behavior is not acceptable and not the proper way to get what he wants. Of course, he is JUST nine months old, so I'm not sure how much of my explanations are getting through to him, but I console myself by thinking that "at least I'm trying and one day he will understand what I'm saying."

On the tooth front, he's got 1 tooth on top and a 4TH tooth coming in on the bottom (5 toots total now). =) He still dislikes most baby foods and is still a finicky solid foods eater. He likes yogurt, crackers, noodles, bread and rice with gravy/sauce on it. We try to sneak in baby foods filled with veggies and fruits into these starches so that he gets the nutrients that his body needs to grow. But feeding time is still a challenge.

ON the mobility front, he's still army crawling, though we have seen him crawl on his hands and knees. He just seems to prefer his old faithful method of traveling. He can pull up well and has been starting to cruise, but still cant get himself back down without plopping down. He hasn't stood on his own (without support of furniture or a person) yet. He can clap and we're working on teaching him bye-bye. He likes to copy certain sounds we make, one of the most funniest being the sound "ah" one would say after eating or drinking. Super funny.

It's been a while since I've posted a picture of the goober boy, so here are a couple.

2 month vaccinations

Two days ago, Kaua had his 2 month pediatrician's appointment. He's doing great! He weighed in at 13lbs 14oz and 24.5". That put him in the 90th percentile for height and weight. Guess we gotta big boy on our hands. I hope that trend continues! =) Doc said he was a perfectly healthy happy baby...so we're good.

At this appointment he was given his first round of vaccinations. He had an oral drink and 3 shots. He puked up the oral drink. I mean projectile vomit. It went all over daddy's shirt and pants and even into daddy's pants pocket. I guess he didn't get any of that vaccination. The nurse said it was ok, and it was probably because he had a full tummy (I had nursed him about 1 hour prior to the appoinment though). She said he'll get that oral drink again at his next appointment....not sure how we'll get around the projectile vomit....I guess we'll ask the doctor.

Then he got three shots in the legs. He took the shots ok. Of course he cried and freaked out and it was a little traumatic for DH who had to hold down his arms while the nurse held down his legs while she did it. I thought it was going to be difficult for me to watch but it wasn't. To me, seeing his pain afterwards was worse.

He seemed relatively fine for the most part after the shots. He was groggy and a little fussy which was to be expected. He went to sleep but when he woke up later in the evening he was not a happy camper. He was crying pretty loud and you could tell he was not feeling good. He also had a fever of 99.6. We didn't have any children's tylenol because I (stupidly) listened to my mom who said that I didn't need it. (I had said that I read other moms comment that they give their kid tylenol before the appointment and it works wonders and my mom made me feel like it was completely unnecesary). Next time, I'm sooo going to listen to those other mom's out there...... Anyways, i made DH run to the store at night to pick up the infant tylenol but by the time he got back, Kaua had fallen asleep. I didn't want to wake him so he didn't end up getting any. He woke up in the middle of the night for his regular feeding, and he seemed fine..and since then he's been great.

So all in all, not too bad for the first set of vaccinations. It is heart wrenching though. Knowing that you're causing your child pain. But the way I cope with it is that I'm sure if he were to get sick with any of the illnesses we're vaccinating him for, he'd be feeling 10x worse and for much longer than he does for the vaccinations. It is a little scary though -- reading about the potential side effects of the vaccinations. But for now, I'm trusting good old western medicine and am getting Kaua vaccinated. I know there are other moms out there that have opted not to vaccinate or to go on an extended vaccination schedule. Hey, whatever works for you, I'm all for it.

Kaua will get his next round of vaccinations at his 4 month appointment in April. Not looking forward to it...

38 weeks

I'm 38 weeks 2 days today. I just had my PNA and sadly, I'm just 1 cm dilated and very little, if at all, effacement. I saw Nurse Wonderful again today and she said she thinks I'm going to give birth close to (or after) my due date. =( I'm surprised at how devastated I am by this news. I think part of it is because a friend of mine, who was due just 4 days prior to me, just gave birth on Sunday. (Her water broke a little, so they started her on pitocin). That gave me hope that my time would come soon...but she was dilated for 2 cm for a while already. I just started dilating, and the way Nurse Wonderful said it, it sounded like I was 1 cm at best. =(

The good news is I gained back the 5 lbs I lost over the past few weeks. So I've been given the green light to be able to exercise again. not sure what kind of exercise I'll be doing, but probably lotsa walking and of course - s.e.x. - as DH and I try to speed this little guy's arrival along.

I also now know what a contraction feels like because when NP Wonderful was in there, she massaged the cervix a little to try to get it to soften/open up. The cramping that I felt during this was what she said I could expect to feel when I have contractions. I now know that the BH that I though I was having were not BH, but instead just baby boy, sticking his body out, making my tummy feel hard. that explains why I'm not very dilated at this point despite the "BH" I thought I'd been having daily. lol. Ah well, at least now I know.

So how am I feeling at 38 weeks? Heavy and sore and uncomfortable. Walking hurts. Moving my right leg at all, hurts (even to put on clothes, get out of bed, standing up from a sitting position, everything!) My feet are tired. My body feels tired. My brain feels tired. I think a lot of this has to do with not only being 38 and a half weeks pregnant, but also the heavy work load I've been enduring for the past 3 weeks, coupled with the house in escrow and all the paperwork and deadlines I'm having to go through associated with that, plus having a part-time DH (since he's gone 3-4 days of the week) and also living with my MIL. It's just too much for me.

I know, I'm throwing myself a pity party. I'll perk up b/c my mom comes into town tomorrow night until Sunday night! Yippee!! (Not sure how this is going to work with MIL visiting since we only have one guest bed. I have a feeling MIL will stay with other relatives while my mom is in town...but I haven't exactly spoken with her about it.)

And last, but certainly not least - here's my 38 week belly photo:



I forgot to measure myself!!! Not to worry, I'll probably have a 39 week belly photo to measure myself with. Ok, pity party B MoM over and out!

31 weeks and 7th PNA update

I've completed 31 weeks of pregnancy this weekend. But I dont have a photo to share because I went camping (that was super fun!).

Last week friday I had my 7th PNA. DH was off and was able to come along. This was the last of my every 4 week appointments. I'm now going to have PNAs every two weeks, next one next Friday already!!

Kaua is doing well. Doc didn't comment on my uterus/tummy measurement, but I'm assuming all is well since he ended the appointment saying that I'm doing exceptionally well. Doc also didn't comment on my weight gain (he never really does), but I gained 4 lbs since my last PNA putting me up to 26lbs total!!! bleh! Kaua's heartbeat was normal and he appeared to be head down. Doc answered a bunch of prewritten questions I had. Off the top of my head, here are some of the things we talked about:

He indicated that what's been known as a "walking" epidural would not be very effective because if I have enough feeling "down there" to be able to walk around, I likely wouldn't be getting very significant pain relief, which is the purpose for an epidural. He stated that a perenial massage wouldn't be necessary (if I didn't want one). He said that he prefers natural tearing over an episiotomy, unless there is a reason to cut (likely due to fetal distress and the need to get baby out quicker, or the need for a vacuum or foreceps to assist in the delivery). I can continue to workout at the gym like I've been doing up until birth as long as I feel ok. The increased discharge I've been noticing is completely normal for this stage in pregnancy, as long is its generally odorless and clear (which it has been). He offered me the flu shot, but I declined it, (my reasoning is because I've never had the shot before and I rarely get the flu nowadays, so I dont see the need for it). He was fine with me not getting the flu shot, but stated that he would like for me to get the H1N1 shot when it becomes available, which I likely will. He reassured me that its very common for a baby to favor one side of the uterus over the other. Kaua really really likes my upper right side. When he checked for Kaua's heartbeat, it was below my belly button (on the right side) which indicated Kaua is head down! (yippee!!!) and that the big bump that I always feel in my upper right tummy is likely Kaua's butt sticking out. I probably shouldn't try to push the bump in when it's uncomfortable, instead I should try to change positions or move around to get Kaua to move (FYI, this doesn't work all the time, sometimes Kaua is content to stay as is, no matter how I move around). His standard recommendation for purposes of temporary disability insurance is 6 weeks off froom work for a standard vaginal delivery and 8 weeks off from work for a c-section. He said that he would provide me with a recommendation to get off of work 2 weeks prior to delivery if I wanted it as well. I asked if he would simply add on the 2 weeks after I give birth, to his standard 6 -8 week recomendation for time off from work, but he said that the insurers are pretty strict and that increasing the time after delivery must be for a substantial reason. I doubt I'll take advantage of the two weeks off prior to delivery, just because we need my full salary, and there is no sense in me not working two weeks prior to delivery if Kaua isn't here. I'd much rather work to help alleviate our financial strains. Of course, if I could extend my maternity leave (with some pay) I would totally take advantage of it if it meant I could spend more time with my son.

That's all I can think of at this time.

On the symptom front I think the only new symptoms are somewhat slight swelling in my ankles. It's not really noticable in appearance yet, but I noticed it because one of my sandals that are normally too big for me, are fitting me a little better. The back straps still fall down, but they stay up for a little longer than before. I also have a little more pain when standing up at times (my uterus feels full or I feel some slight round ligament pain). According to WTE, Kaua is almost 4 lbs and almost 19 inches long. His weight gain and growth is supposed to slow down from now till birth. I'm feeling ready for him to come out now, (I miss my flat tummy and the ease of movement you take for granted till you have a huge belly) though I know its best that he doesn't show up till 36 or 37 weeks at the earliest. Less than 9 weeks till Kaua! I know I'm going to panic when it gets closer and I realize I still have very little baby things!!

Another PNA went well.

I'm losing track, I think this is my 6th PNA. We'll just call it my 27w3d appt since that what I am today. Overall everything is still going well. I gained just 3 lbs since my last appointment (but that could be because most of my appointments have been after lunch and this one was before, but hey, I'll take it). So far the weight gain is up 22 lbs since my prepregnancy weight and while that seems like way too much for me, the doctor said I'm right on track in the weight gain department. (Let's pray I only gain 8 more lbs total and I'll have stuck to my original goal of just gaining 30 lbs).

My uterus is also measuring approximately 27 cm which is right on track and Kaua's heartbeat was averaging in the 140 BMP which is also right on track. My pee test (which I think they check for sugars or proteins, who knows) is normal, my blood pressure is normal, just about everything is normal. Hah, you'd never guess the kind of MC history I had prior to this pregnancy had you not known about it. But it's all very good so I'm happy.

We talked about me passing the glucola test and being slightly anemic. Doc said it was normal for women in this stage of pregnancy to get slighly anemic and that if I had a low red blood cell count, I would feel fatigued and lethargic (not sure if I'm feeling that now) and that during birth, I will typically lose some blood and if that is coupled with an anemia condition, it could make me even more fatigued and lethargic after birth. So, I could either take an iron supplement OR eat more foods rich in iron. (Hmm, too late, I already bought the iron supplement based on the advice of the nurse who called me). So I told him I'll be doing both, taking the iron supplement and trying to eat more foods rich in iron. We went over the instructions that I was not to take the supplement with dairy products, but he did tell me that if I took it with citrus (like orange juice or cranberry juice) that that would HELP with the iron's absorbtion in my body. So perhaps, I'll go pick some cranberry juice up to have with my pill (which I love, but it's got to be cran-grape or cran-apple, or some other mixture) .

From here on out, doc said I'm supposed to be able to feel Kaua move pretty consistently. Doc was a little vague on the meaning of "consistently" but what I got from our discussion is that I should feel him every day, I should feel at least 6 movements after eating and if I think that I dont, I should drink something cold, lie down and really pay attention to his movements. Baby will typically move more when I'm resting.

As for what type of movement I'm actually feeling, I'd say he's pretty active often and I feel him probably every couple of hours. Over the past few days he's been very active, to the point where I'm like geeze Kaua, take it easy in there, I'm trying to rest! But he still makes me laugh. His movements are a mix between kicks (taps) and what I call body movements (where it seems like he's brushing a body part against my tummy or pressing his head or other body part out). Doc said that it's normal to be feeling the body movements at this point, but as the space gets more cramped, it'll diminish to more kicks. I can tell that Kaua is getting bigger because his movements are stronger and on the rare occasion, his movements/kicks will take my breath away or really make me pause. Nothing painful, just more surprising and sometimes uncomfortable or distracting. Overall, his movements are reassuring though.

I've been reading that some girls due around the same time as me are starting to have every 2 week appointments from this point on, but not me, I got one more 4 week appointment (sometime around October 3, they didn't have the schedule up yet, so they'll call me to confirm soon), then after that one (where I'll be almost 32 weeks), I'll be going in every 2 weeks.

I also asked if I had any other big tests to take and he said the only other thing that will happen that's different than what I've been doing in these PNAs is that at my 36 week appointment, they'll be doing a vaginal exam and culture to check on my cervix (looking for dilation) and to see what position the baby is in. Doc said that by 36 weeks, the baby usually doesn't flip around and is usually in the position he'll be in for birth. For about 95% of women, the baby is head down, but if I happen to be in that 5% category (breech), then we'll have to talk about my options then. I hope Kaua decides to stay in the 95% category. Doc said he thought the baby was head down during the exam because when he found the heartbeat (which was immediately, it's amazing how fast they find it now), it was below my belly buttom which indicated to him that baby was likely head down.

We also talked about pediatrician recommendations and pregnancy class recommendations. Lucky for me, he agreed that I didn't need to take the childbirth preparation classes (which cost $80!!). I am already taking other classes offered by my health care provider (which are free) which he said are the important ones, and I'm planning on renting the Laugh and Learn DVDs (on childbirth, labor, newborn care and breastfeeding) from my library, so we're covered in the educational department. Also, I asked about getting a lactation consultant and he said the way it works for our health care provider, the consultants usually come around while I'm in the hospital after birth to see if I need help. He said to be sure that I see one, all I need to do is tell the L&D nurse I'd like to see one and she'll set it up. So, no worries about that till after birth.

I meant to bring my birth plan in to talk about it with my doctor this appointment, but I forgot it (which is becoming quite typical for me nowadays - forgetfulness), so doc said to bring that in for the next appointment and we can go over it.

So far everything is going A-OK for me and baby and that's just dandy! (yeah, I said dandy. =) ) We're in the home stretch!! =)

Crib came!

I order the crib on monday from Ama.zon, and it came on Thursday. Crazy! Who knew it'd arrive so fast? =) Too bad DH isn't here till next weekend to set it up. But I'm going to fly to visit him tonight and will be there till Tuesday! Yippee!! I'm so exited. I miss him and my doggy, even though I just sent them off on Monday as well. It'll be nice to see them and the rest of my family. I'm really looking forward to spending time with them all. =)

I take my blood glucose screening test today. I wont find out the results till my next PNA which is next week Wednesday. I really hope I pass. I asked the doctor whethere there was anything special I needed to be doing to prepare for it and she said no, just dont eat candy or drink soda right before the test. I attended a birthday BBQ for a friend last night and there were a TON of desserts, my pregnancy weakness. I hope that doesn't alter the results.

5th PNA went well

By now, these PNA appointments are becoming fairly routine and uneventful for me. I even went all by my little self like a big girl. I got to see my old OB - Dr. B because my current OB, Dr. M. was on vacation. I like Dr. B because she has great bedside manners. I feel as if she takes more time with me to explain things. My repoire with her is best. But unfortunately, I had to switch from her because when I was having the MC complications, she kept referring me out to other doctors, which I didn't like. I want to see one doctor that does it all (sort of).

Anywas, back to my appointment. Baby boy is doing fine! (Thank you God!) His heartbeat was about 145-150. He wasn't moving very much when she had the doppler on me, (still moving though), but he's been quite the active little guy everyday, so I'm not worried at all. We discussed some questions I had about my funky nipples (apparently its normal for the tips of the nipples to harden a little - almost like scabs - in preparation for my milk production). She said if they get itcy, like they have been off and on, I can put lotion or oil on them (which I have been).

She also encouraged me to consider taking the H1N1 flu shot, which will be out and available in my clinic in October. She said that she's never seen the CDC or the government push a flu vaccination out so fast and explained that pregnant women are on the top of the list of who can get the shot because of the deaths in America, pregnant women are by far a large group of the population who are apparently susceptible, even though they are fairly healthy. I was at first, reluctant to get the shot because I dont like pumping my body full of chemicals and stuff if its not necessary. She helped ease my fears saying that it wasn't like these would be hormones or other chemicals, but instead types of proteins and viruses that will help my body fight off the virus should I ever come into contact with it. She said they've been giving pregnant women the flu vaccination for years and have not found any bad side effects, and the H1N1 would be no different. DH is still not sure he's into me having the shot, especially since October will be so close to my due date anyways (Dec. 6) that it may not even be really necessary. I'm going to give it some more thought....

If you're expecting, what's your stance on getting the H1N1 flu shot?

My next appt is in 27 days and I'll have to take my glucola test a few days prior to the appointment so we can go over my results. This is a big test for me because if I fail, I could have gestational diabetes which means a whole crap load of stuff I need to do to monitor it. (GD can cause your baby to grow to big and other complications in your pregnancy and with baby). My coworker had GD during her first pregnancy and just found out she has it again for her 2nd pregnancy. It's not a fun thing to have at all. And unfortunately, its just something someone gets during pregnancy, no matter how healthy or unhealthy they are. So this next appt will be a biggie for me. The good news for GD is that I'll be on a strict diet which will hopefully regulate this weight gain, because even though I've been trying to be good, I still gained another 5 lbs since my last appt. The total weight gain for me has been 19 lbs so far! yucky!

Also up on the countdown list for me - 2 more weeks till the MIL leaves!!! Ugh! Cant wait. She's a fine houseguest and all, but still, 2 months is just way way way way too long to be living with your MIL. I miss having it just be me and the hubsters at home. But the sad thing is DH leaves to go to his new job location (with less pay!!!) just 4 days after MIL leaves, so that's sad. =( We'll try to fly back and forth to see each other every weekend, but with a pay cut, it may not be feasible to do it every weekend. We'll see though...I'm going to pray to God about it, and I'm finding that He always answer my prayers.

20 week ultrasound

Yesterday's ultrasound went fantastic! Baby boy's heart is perfect. His anatomy is still perfect. Everything is going just smoothly. Based on such a good review, our risks for a baby with Ds decreased further by 50-70%. I'm not so good with numbers, but my quad screen risk assessment was 1 in 77 which is about 1.2% risk. If that decreases by another 50-70%, that means what, my risk is down to 0.03-0.05% risk? Those odds sound pretty darn good to me. =)

Yesterday I also learned that the length of my cervix is perfect, or as the doctor described it "beautiful" so no risk of preterm labor there. Interestingly, I also have anterior placenta, which just means that your placenta is growing towards the front of my uterus (rather than positioned closer to my back side), meaning that there's an extra cushion (the placenta) between baby and my belly muscles. The position of the placenta doesn't really affect your baby at all, but it could muffle my baby's movements and cause me to feel baby's movements later than others. Doc said this isn't always the case with someone with anterior placenta, and I'm not sure if its a factor in my baby movement feelings. Right now, I do feel baby boy, and have been since about 15 weeks, but perhaps those feelings could be a lot stronger than what they are. If that's the case, I'm kinda grateful, b/c that means maybe he'll be waking me up a lot less at night and have less kicks that are somewhat painful because I've got some extra padding to soften his blows. Eh, who knows. Not a big deal to me.

I also found out baby boy already weighs 1 lb! That's cool, because according to most websites and the WTE book, babies generally measure about 10 oz, so that means he's a smidge bigger than the average. Doc said that baby boy's measurements are right on schedule for how far along I am and so far my due date is still the same.

Baby boy is currently positioned head down (towards my cervix) and facing sunny side up (towards my tummy).

Let's see, what else did I learn. Oh yeah, this will be my last ultrasound with the perinatologist (unless there are other complications), so that's a good thing and bad thing. Good b/c who wants complications, not me! But bad b/c that may be the last I see of the firecracker till birth.

Ok, now for the cool stuff. the pictures! Baby boy was moving around a lot, as usual, so the profile pictures aren't the greatest, but nevertheless, I'm still a proud mommy.

Here's a couple profile pics. (with his legs cut off, hope that means he's long/tall).
In the first photo, you can see his umbilical cord just above his body:




Here's a profile picture with him waving and saying "Hi Mommy & Daddy!"


Here's a couple photos of his "man parts" and yup, he's quite clearly a boy!!!


The Doc zoomed in for this one, and I made the following comment (which caused him to chuckle and put it on the picture:)


And last but not least, here's a couple profile pictures with baby boy moving his body a bit. Notice in the second one, the doc pointed out that we can see his little peepee (look for the arrow):






That's all for today. Overall, it was an excellent 20 week and 1 day photo session for the firecracker! DH and I are overjoyed to have a healthy little boy. Thank you God for our miracle. =)

20 week ultra sound today!

I haven't gone to the appointment yet. I'm just so excited that I had to post about it now. I admit, I'm getting nervous too. Doctor's appointments are always a little nerve wracking. I miss those days when a doctor visit was nothing more than a tedious routine visit I did on the required 6 month or annual visit and I was completely confident that nothing would be wrong. I was always such a healthy individual, so I was lucky in the sense that I never really had to dread the doctor's office, or dread the dentist's office.

After my 2 MCs (ontop of a prior history of 2 abnormal papsmears), the doctor's office has become a place of dread for me. Of course, it's not always like this, especially now, when things have been going so smoothly, but even so, that dread feeling creeps back in. I'm pretty sure I've been feeling some movement from the little firecracker within the past hour this morning (before that I was getting worried and even googled when I should be feeling consistent movement in the pregnancy -- according to dr. google its not till 27 or 28 weeks), so I'm sure that we'll go in and see a live little baby on the monitor (see, I take nothing for granted...the small joy of having a living baby...that's always a something I'm grateful for). I'm just still nervous... you know? We're going in for a heart check, just because the doctor wasn't able to see all that he wanted to see the last time we went in because baby boy was just 16 weeks.

I'm planning to ask the doctor to walk me through what he's looking at (last time he didn't), whether my chances for risk of Ds have gone down now that we've had two good u/s (I'm already planning on this one going good), and to tell me the length of my cervix, and the length and weight of the baby. Hope I remember to ask all these questions.

I learned by way of ambush over the telephone that the MIL is coming to this appointment. Yippee. On the way into work this AM, i called DH and asked if he was going to meet me at the hospital for the appointment. I asked whether his MIL was dropping him off (she's using his car while she stays here) and he said no, that she wanted to come with us. Then he asked, that's ok right? (Note that she's sitting in the car with him while he's asking), so of course, I say it's ok (or I actually think I said "whatever") because really, what was I supposed to say without sounding rude? I think that I should be fine with her coming because after all, she is DH's mom, and if my mom lived where we did, I'd want her to be there for sure. It's just.... well.....weird for me to have her there. I feel like its a personal private moment for me and DH and I dont want someone there that I'm not comfortable with. So of course, I called my own mom afterwards to gripe and she helped me to realize that I should be thankful that this baby is so loved and that MIL wants to take such an active role in this pregnancy. Also, I'm really trying to keep in mind how important MIL is to DH, and so whatever makes him happy should make me happy. Ah well....I'm totally willing to have MIL or anyone else in the room, all as long as baby boy is thriving along and doing wonderful. That's all that really matters in the end.

4th PNA went well... as usual.

Whew, sigh of relief. The 4th PNA went well. =) It was kinda boring, as usual. I had my IRL friend come with me since DH couldn't make it. (Thanks M.alia!)

We got to hear the firecracker's heartbeat, but only for a couple seconds because he was moving around too much and the doctor had to chase him. Doc said he's pretty active, and I think that's a good thing, though I didn't ask and he didn't say. But generally, I've known that an active baby is a sign of a healthy baby. It was also pretty funny b/c at one point, we could hear the faint sound of music. I commented that baby's got a radio in my tummy and doc laughed and said sometimes, dopplers pick up music.

Doc also told me that my uterus is about 1-2 inches above my belly button and said those popping, fluttery gassy feelings are probably baby movement. He said my bowels are pushed up higher, so anything belly button level and down is baby. That's awesome, b/c that means I probably have been feeling baby a lot. I'm pretty sure I felt him move last night and even in the middle of the night.

I've also been instructed that after my next PNA appt (which is on Aug. 11), I should not be sleeping on my back anymore. I've been pretty consistently trying to sleep on my side for the past couple of weeks already b/c my back gets a little achy when I lie on it for long, so now I have doctor's orders to try and avoid it. I know the drill though, dont freak if I wake up and I'm on my back, just roll to the side and go back to sleep.

The pillow between my leg deal has also been my best friend at night. =) And I bought a very comfy cheap sports bra on sale and I've slept with that on the last couple of nights. I like it b/c I'm not used to these puppies being so big and it feels weird to have the bottoms of my BBs touching my skin underneath. Very uncomfortable for someone who's never been that big ever before.

Next hurdle is having a great anatomy scan (and where the perinatologist will be checking our baby's heart) next Monday. And coming up, this weekend we reach our halfway point in the pregnancy!!!

Oh and the craziness of weight gain!! I've gained 6 lbs since my last appointment for a total weight gain of 14 lbs! I'm soooo watching what I eat from now on!!!

4th PNA today.

I'll go in for my 4th PNA in about 5 hours. I admit it, I'm nervous. It's been a while since I last seen a doctor. A little over 3 weeks, but that's a long time for me. Over the course of this pregnancy, I've averaged seeing a doctor about every 2 weeks (not by choice for some of them), but it was helpful to see a doctor to either hear the heartbeat or see the firecracker on u/s. The longest time I went in between doctor's appts was in the very beginning when I first found out I was pregnant and when we went on our trip. Now I feel invested.

I know I shouldn't be worried. I should be standing on my faith, that all is going well. But I'm a crazy lady and google is not my friend right now, and I read all these sad stories of women who lose their children far along into the pregnancy or have still born children. I dont know why I do this to myself. I drive myself crazy. Then I drive DH crazy by asking him to reassure me that all is ok.

DH may not make it to the doctor's appointment today. He's working on fixing up our house so we can put it on the market at the end of August. So if he's not done with his project, he wont be able to come. I told him it was ok, because the biggie appointment (where we go back to the perinatologist for another level 2 u/s) is next week monday, but now that he may not be coming, I'm more terrified. What am I going to do without my rock? Ugh.

I cannot think like that. Everything is going to be fine. It's going to be perfect. It'll be a boring appointment, pretty much like how most of my appointments have been. I need to stop working myself up into a nervous wreck!

So "he" is actually a...

Can you guess?




Ok if you're having a hard time (believe me, me and DH were a little stumped at first....I mean, we dont know what we're looking at...so we tentatively asked, "A boy?" Dr. O chuckled and zoomed in and gave us this picture, which left no doubt.)



IT'S A BOY!

Needless to say, the ultra sound with the perinatologist, Dr. O, went well! We actually saw the doctor for a total of 10 minutes, but had to sit in the waiting room for about two hours!! (They had had a prior emergency). Doc was funny and tried to explain the quad results and whether we were going to decide to do the amnio as a comparison to playing black jack in Las Vegas. The explanation was actually a little confusing to me, but I'm glad he tried to put it in laymens terms. (Part of me wanted to just say, look doc, tell it to me straight, in technical terms. I've done so much research, that I'll probably understand that best. But of course I didn't).

Thanks be to God, our baby is completely healthy and normal! Doc even went on to say that our ultrasound was "boring!" That's awesome. We LOVE boring. So of course, we're not going to do an amnio. Dr. O is having us come back in a month to take a better look at the heart though, only becaust at 16 weeks, the baby is too young to really get a good look at it (but we did see the four chambers of the heart, which I read is normal). (I've also read previously that the heart is more fully developed, and easier to view, around 22 weeks, so no alarm there.) Hey, I get one more closer look at MY SON!! Holy moly, I cannot believe I just typed that. That was the first time I've ever referred to this baby as MY SON!

We are just so over the moon!

God is so glorious! Prayer and faith really works!!!!

Looks like we're not doing a gender reveal party. We're just too excited, we are bursting with the news.

Here's a parting photo of OUR SON!!! (Isn't he cute and handsome already? lol, such a proud mommy).

3rd/4th PNA update

Work has been hectic recently and it has prevented me from posting about yesterday's appointment, till now. (However, I have been praying to God to help me find a resolution to this hectic work issue and, what do ya know, the Lord has answered! I received some reprieve today, and I'm praying the issue will be resolved by the end of the week! God is really good!)

As for the appointment, it went great! It's so amazing and wonderful to have such positive appointments. Such a beautiful change from those awful appointments I had been having all through the end of last year. DH and I went in and met with my OBGYN, Dr. M, and we were able to discuss a ton of questions that I had written down (since I obviously seem to forget them on the spur of the moment). I got generally good responses to my questions, and Dr. M even commended me on my questions and dedication to exercise. He said he does not often have a pregnant patient who exercises (he approximated that 1 in 10 of his patients exercise), so that was nice to hear.

He also measured my uterus, by taking out a tape measure and measuring from my pubic bone to where he felt the top of my uterus was externally, and said it measured 15.5 CM which he said is just right for how far along I am in pregnancy (15.5 weeks). He also noted that my weight gain was appropriate too - 8lbs total so far (though, I'm always a little concerned about that one).

Then we got down to business. He pulled out the doppler and we looked for baby's heartbeat. He found it much quicker than it took NP Wonderful at the last, last appointment, so that was reassuring. He estimated that baby's average heartbeat was 140BPM. He said anything above 120 is healthy! (Hmmm, according to that old wives tale, anything above 140 would tend to indicate girl and anything under 140 would tend to indicate a boy...guess this baby is not giving away any hints as to what he or she is for now.) He also pointed out how strong and consistent the heartbeat was, which he said was good and indicated a healthy heart. He said if the baby had complications, the heartbeat would not have been as loud or consistent.

It was also cool to hear how the baby would move about while we listened to the heartbeat. The doctor would comment on it and note that he had to switch the doppler's position a bit to "chase" him. Of course, at 15 and half weeks, I still didn't feel any of these movements. Doc said not to worry, that usually, women in their first pregnancy dont feel or recognize baby's movements until 19-22 weeks. He also said baby wont be consistently kicking (which would mean I would need to do daily kick counts) till week 27 or 28.

Over all, Dr. M said we were doing well and applauded me for the great work. I said, it's not me, it's the baby doing well! (And God, of course!). I go back to see him in one month, on July 14. And of course, we have our BIG u/s on July 7 with the peri (or is it neo?) -natologist!!! Sooooo very exciting and a little scary (we'll be checking for birth defects too)!

Quick note on the symptom front - this morning was the first time in a long time I had nausea. I hadn't eaten breakfast before heading into work (b/c food was sounding nasty at the moment, but dont worry i wasn't planning to starve, I packed a breakfast to eat at the office) and during the drive in, I felt the urge to gag and felt very queasy. I quickly got out some dried fruit I had packed as a snack but that was not helping. I got into work and my pregnant co-worker and secretary (mother of 2) noted my pale queasy state and suggested I eat crackers. Luckily I had a stash at work, so I munched on that, and ALL better! =)

Next up, planning my gender reveal party!

15 weeks!

We made it to the end of another week! Hallelujah! I'm a week away from being officially 4 months pregnant. The belly is getting bigger, which means baby is getting bigger (or so I'd like to think, rather than just mommy is getting fatter...which is probably the actual case). I'm clocking in at a whole inch in growth at the waiste as compared to last week -- 35 inches.

Tomorrow is ANOTHER PNA appt. Not sure if you'd call this my 3rd or 4th, because it's my 3rd scheduled PNA, but my 4th visit to the doctor (since we did the little surprise surprise visit and got the 13 week u/s photo of the little squirt). On my mind to ask the doctor is 1) if we're allowed to bring in a recording device to our next u/s appt. on July 7th (which is a little scary for me b/c the last time we brought in a recording device, my camera, was the u/s where we found out we had had a 2nd MC....BUT, we're not thinking negative, ONLY POSITIVE!). And I swear, I had a #2 question but I cannot remember what it is at this time.... Am I nervous, I'm not sure? I guess a part of me is nervous and I doubt I'll ever be super confident at these things (you know, the whole finding out you're baby is dead at one of your prior appts does that to a gal), but I'm feeling fairly good and am confident things will go just swell (and nifty....gee willikers).

The latest on my baby brain -- having a gender reveal party or BBQ to share the gender of our baby with friends and family after our July 7th appt. We're going to ask doc to put the baby's gender (and hopefully a photo showing the "specific part") into an enevelope which we will open while amongst friends and family (if any want to come). It'll be fun to see what everyone's guesses will be right before hand. DH and I have no preferences for this pregnancy, we just want a happy, healthy baby. At first I thought we were having a girl, then I thought we were having a boy, and now I'm confused because I have no idea. I think I still think we're having a girl, but part of me thinks I secretly want a boy (b/c I think DH would be sooo cute with a boy, and even a girl)....who knows!?? Where we're going to have the party? I have no idea...maybe our place? but it's been so beautiful out, so maybe at the beach.....hmm, gonna go with the flow on this one....

Also on the baby brain, figuring out what kinds of stuff we'll need to get the baby - the latest has been car seats and strollers. We haven't really went out to look at these things yet b/c money isn't quite flowing right now (we're going to sell our house sometime soon and in this market, it may mean a loss, but we're praying for a profit and I know God answers prayers!!), and I think we'll *hopefully* get some hand-me-downs from my very fertile friends and family as well as some great shower gifts, but I'm reading up on what's good and what's not. I'm hearing good things about the Graco brand for baby car seats and strollers and the like. I've also heard a good book to help in making these decisions is Baby Bargains, but part of me is being too cheap and doesn't want to spend the $20 it'll cost me to buy the book, so I've been waiting to borrow it from the library (I'm #8 on the request line). I figure, we'll get down to serious buying business in month 6, but I want to plan now, so that should the need ever arise (or the money just fall into our laps), I'll know what to buy.

As for pregnancy symptoms, they're few and pretty good. I see why people call the 2nd trimester the easiest. Though, I must admit, 1st trimester was easy for me too (and these tiny pimples!?? gag me!!!) I've got no nausea, and my urge to pee has subsided. No more waking up in the middle of the night for me! Yippee! My eating is still pretty hefty, so I'm a little nervous to step on that scale at the doctor's office (at my last visit at 13weeks, I was up about 5 lbs since prepregnancy, so imagine how high I'll be two weeks later!!) According to one website, I'm supposed to have gained only about 5lbs as of right now, but I doubt I lost weight the last two weeks, so the number tomorrow will be a doozy! I really meant to be a good girl this weekend and work out so that I could trick the doctor's office scale into thinking I had gained the proper amount of weight, but ah well, that didn't happen, so I guess I'll just have to suffer the consequences of seeing that stupid sliding weight thingy go way way way down to the right side of the scale. ugh...But I'm not complaining, I'm loving this pregnancy....promise. My co-worker also pointed out that I've probably gained the most in my boobies, which I admit, is probably true....these suckers have a mind of their own. I've always complained about being "smallish" but man-oh-man, I miss being small. This puppies are getting in the way!

Without further adieu, here's the latest belly photo (completely with me showing my buttocks off for you all in my bathing suit...sorry for you sensitive stomach readers, avert your eyes if you're easily offended.)

everything is perfect

everything is perfect, just like i thought..yeah, mmhhmm, not a doubt in my mind.....ever. lol. (*laughs sheepishly*)

Baby is still there and his heart is beating away. We got an ultrasound picture too. Again, I'll have to repost tomorrow with the picture so I can take a picture of the picture and upload that. Unless anyone knows how to upload a pdf. document onto this post.....

But yup....we got our reassurance, and even alittle scare (in a good way). The doc I saw thought I was measuring big and asked if I didn't have two in there!!?? (are you crazy?!!) We checked, and yup, there's just one, but she thinks I'm further along than we think....we'll find out when I see my regular doctor, Dr. M in two weeks.

Whatever. I'm just glad we have a heartbeat. And he was so cute! When we first saw our little one he had his left hand up to his head, like he was thinking. Doc said it'd be going to Harvard and I said, yup, just like mommy. (Yeah, I'm referring to it as a boy.....but it could be a girl....but for now, it'll have a "he" gender reference.) We tried to get a picture of our little thinker, but no such luck, he put his hand back down before we were able to get the picture.

Stay tuned for more....in the adventures of a nervous mom...... lol. (btw: glad to know I'm in similar company with all of my preggo or previously preggo bloggy friends).