A scene from Ghoulies II (1988)
It seems like you guys can’t get enough of these monsters
from filmland series of articles so here my friends, I give to you another
installment for your reading pleasure! This article is is filled with some truly strange cinematic
beings, hope you enjoy it!
Film: The Resurrected (1992)
Creature: Mutant Experiment
Description: This film is based on H.P. Lovecraft’s ‘The
Strange Case of Charles Dexter Ward’ and is basically about a scientist who is
experimenting with a chemical that can help him achieve everlasting life.
Basically he’s found a way to transfer himself onto another body. But like all
mad scientists, he makes a couple of mistakes along the way and the resulting
mistakes are the horribly disfigured creature you see pictured above, which the
good doctor keeps hidden away in a dark, dank dungeon beneath his laboratory.
Quote: “I think you’ve found a way to live forever…but it’s
messy”
Film: Gremlins 2: The New Batch (1990)
Creatures: The Gremlins
Description: This movie is one big love letter to monster
movies. It seems director Joe Dante wanted to cram as many monsters as he could
onto this one; the result is literally hundreds of variations of Gremlins.
Where in the first film most of the Gremlins looked pretty much the same (save
for their leader ‘Striper’ who had a white mohawk) on this sequel there’s so
many different types of Gremlins, you’ll have a hard time keeping track of
them. Let’s see…we get the ‘Veggie Gremlin’ ‘Lady Gremlin’ ‘Talkative Gremlin’
‘Spider Gremlin’ the ‘Bat Gremlin’ to name but a few.
Quote: “All they have to do is eat three or four children
and there would be the most appalling publicity”
Film: Q: The Winged Serpent
Creature: Q: The Winged Serpent
Description: This film comes to us from Larry Cohen, the
director responsible for such films as It’s Alive (1974) and its sequels, and
The Stuff (1985), which of course means your in B-Movie territory, and that’s
all Q: The Winged Serpent aims to be, and achieves it. A giant winged serpent
is flying through the New York
skies snatching people from the rooftops of buildings and eating them! It’s up
to an ex-con piano player to help the NYPD find the creatures nest and stop the
creature from killing any more New Yorkers.
Quote: “Eat em! Eat em! Crunch! Crunch!”
Film: The Never Ending Story (1984)
Creature: Morla - The Ancient One
Description: This film is filled with creatures left and
right, but one of the ones that always stuck to my head was Morla, the giant
turtle. You see, in the film, Atreyu the films hero needs to find information
about how to stop ‘The Nothing’ a big black cloud that is devouring the land of ‘Fantasia’ and its
Morla ‘The Ancient One’ who sends Atreyu in the right direction. She is so
ancient that she knows everything, unfortunately she doesn’t care very much
about anything either! Another problem is that she talks really slow and is
allergic to youth! You don’t want to be standing in front of Morla when she
sneazes; just ask Atreyu who gets hurled a couple of feet in the air when Morla
sneezes on him!
Quote: “We don’t even care whether or not we care”
Creature: The Demon
Description: On this film we meet Dr. John Holden, a man who
does not believe in the supernatural. He’s such an incurable skeptic that he
goes to a symposium on the supernatural simply to expose a Dr. Julian Karswell,
the leader of a satanic cult. He is such a skeptic that he accepts an invitation
to stay at Dr. Karswell’s mansion. Problem is that Karswell is the real deal,
and the supernatural is real! So, looking for a way to kill Dr. John Holden,
Dr. Julian Karswell slips Holden a magical parchment that assures whoever is
holding it a quick death at the hands of the demon you see pictured above.
Originally director Jaques Tourneur didn’t want to reveal the demon at any
moment during the film, he wanted to make a more psychological film, but at the
insistence of the films producers, he found himself obligated to show the
creature, which of course is great because we got yet another memorable
creature to place in the annals of Hollywood
horror.
Quote: “But where does imagination end and reality begin?
What is this twilight, this half world of the mind that you profess to know so
much about? How can we differentiate between the powers of darkness and the
powers of the mind? ”
Film: Mom and Dad Save the World (1992)
Creature: Deadly Alien Mushrooms
Description: This movie is one of the craziest movies you
will ever see. It is a mixture between science fiction, fantasy and comedy that
is so underrated it’s not even funny. It is not an intelligent film (in fact
far from it) but then again, that’s exactly the kind of film it wants to be. To
me Mom and Dad Save the World has always felt like something straight out of
Monty Python, or perhaps it feels like something that Terry Gilliam would have
directed, while high on weed. The film tells the story of Emperor Tod Spengo, a
dictator who with the help of a very powerful microscope catches a glimpse at
Marge and Dick Nelson, a regular every day middle class couple who are about to
embark on a summer vacation. Unfortunately, Spengo immediately falls in love
with Marge and so with the help of a very powerful magnet Spengo brings Dick
and Marge to his planet so he can marry Marge, kill Dick and destroy the Earth!
Amongst the many creatures we meet in this film (of which there are many trust
me!) we meet the deadly mushrooms you see pictured above. At first they look
kind of cute, but when they start hopping and opening those gaping jaws, you won’t
feel they are so cute anymore.
Quote: “Did I mention we were a planet of Idiots?”
Film: Cats Eye (1985)
Creature: Air Stealing Troll
Description: This is a film composed of various stories that
are all connected by this cat that roams through all the stories. One of the
stories is about this little girl who goes to sleep one night and is visited by
this evil looking little troll who likes to steal the breath from little girls...until
they die! Apparently, this is what this little creature enjoys doing. So
anyways, the cat serves as the little girls protector, the little girl is
played by none other than a very young Drew Barrymore.
Film: Krull (1983)
Creature: The Beast
Description: This film is all about ‘The Beast’, a creature
who flies around space on his flying fortress, searching for worlds to conquer
and for the one female who will be his Queen. The Beasts fortress appears and
disappears out of thin air, which makes it difficult to catch this villain. But
fear not! A group of heroic people decide to take The Beast on, and so they
embark on a journey to find ‘The Glave’ a mythical weapon that can destroy The
Beast. The film is filled with many creatures, including flying horses, giant
spiders, Cyclops and blind sorcerers. The Beast itself is portrayed very
vaguely in the film, often times it is seen in shadows or in a distorted
fashion, but once in a while we get a good glimpse at it, especially towards
the ending of the film.
Quote: “I will allow you to go wherever you please within
these walls; for this is the place from which you will rule this world and
countless others. You cannot escape me, you will be my queen”
Film: House 2: The Second Story (1987)
Creature: Zombie Cowboy
Description: Many love the first House (1986) because it is
one of those monster filled movies from the 80’s that had tons of make up
effects and was heavy on the fun factor. It was a none stop roller coaster ride
of ghosts, creatures and vengeful zombies from Vietnam ! The second film was a bit
different because it turned out to be too sweet when compared to the second
one, which was more of a horror film. This ‘Second Story’ has the same basic
premise of a house that opens portals to other dimensions, but it’s more
centered on adventure and even romance, it kind of feels a little bit like an
Indiana Jones movie. But fear not horror fans! There’s a bit of horror to this
movie in the form of the Zombie Cowboy you see pictured above, he hungers for
the magical skull that can help him live forever. Above all things this skull
cowboy simply looks cool! I also loved the idea of him riding on a zombie
horse! The film has a couple of other cool creatures, amongst them a
pterodactyl, a zombie grandpa and a worm/dog, which is pretty weird on its
own.
Quote: “Look at me, I’m a 170 year old fart, I’m a god damn
zombie!”
Creature: Sewer Monster/Chinese Wild Man
Description: Honestly, I call this one the monkey monster,
but I don’t know what the hell it is. If you ask John Carpenter though, he will
tell you exactly what it is. According to Carpenters script for Big Trouble in
Little China this creature is “The most horrific creature…thing…abomination you
ever saw. An unnatural monster of myth and legend, a Chinese wild man made of
flesh and blood, with long twisted locks
of fire red hair, yellow teeth and yellow eyes…the claws on his fingers that
dig into Gracie’s arm recalling only death…” so there you have it ladies and
gentlemen. The problem is that if you haven’t read the script for Big Trouble,
then you won’t have an iota of an idea what this creature is, it’s existence is
never explained in the film, it simply is a monster. But whatever, who cares
what it is, it looks monstrous and cool, like most of the monsters in Big
Trouble in Little China, they defy definition.
Quote: “But I do know this is a pretty amazing planet we
live on here and a man would have to be some kind of fool to think were all
alone in this universe!”
Film: Beetlejuice (1986)
Creatures: Adam and Barbara Maitland Ghosts
Description: The Maitland’s have just died, and right in the
middle of their home renovations too! To make matters worse, now they got the
Deetz’s moving into the home they worked so hard on! What’s this ghost couple
to do? Scare the Deetz’s right out of their house that’s what! Problem is they
don’t know much about being ghosts or scaring people, so it takes a few tries
to figure out a way to scare the Deetz’s. One of the many things they try is stretching
their faces out of proportion until they become the hideous visages you see
pictured above.
Quote: “Barb honey, we’re dead. I don’t think we have much
to worry about anymore”
Film: Leprechaun (1993)
Creature: The Leprechaun
Description: Back in 1993, when I was in high school, my high
school buds and gals wanted to go to the theater to see a scary movie. We had
to decide between Bram Stoker Dracula or Leprechaun. I’d read an article on
Fangoria and seen some pictures of the make up effects so I thought Leprechaun
might be a better choice so my friends trusted me, the film geek of the class
to make the choice, so I went with Leprechaun. You probably know how this story
ends. By the end of the film people were kicking my ass over how shitty this
movie had been. Ha! I still wonder how the hell this film got a theatrical
release, but it did, and I fell for the publicity push, sometimes the pictures
in a magazine will make a film look better it actually is. Still, no matter how
‘bad’ these films might be considered, they’ve had a long run. Leprechaun
spawned tons of cheap ass yet fun straight to video sequels and a remake on the
horizon! I guess people like how the Leprechaun cracks jokes every time he’s
going to kill somebody. Come to think of it, in a strange way, The Leprechaun
filled the void that the old Freddy Krueger left when he changed into the
unfunny Freddy he is today. Kudos to Warwick Davis who’s gone on to play The
Leprechaun for so many years.
Quote: “Try as they will, try as they might, who steals me
gold won’t live through the night”
Film: Deep Rising (1998)
Creature: Giant Octopus
Description: So this film is basically about this giant
octopus thing that invades a cruise ship on its inaugural run and little by little
eats every single person on it! In other words, lot’s of gruesome moments are
waiting for you with this film. The creature is an awesome one to behold for
various reasons, number one its huge! It has numerous tentacles and a scary
looking gigantic mouth filled with pointy teeth! In order convey the awesome
scale of the creature, the filmmakers used two methods: miniatures of the ship,
complete with thousands of skeletons and corpses from the people that the
creature had fed upon, and number two, they had Rob Bottin, make up effects
master and monster connoisseur design the thing. The result? A very impressive
movie monster!
Quote: “I don’t mean to sound like a pussy, but this shits
starting to freak me out man!”
Film: Dragonslayer (1981)
Creature: Vermithrax Pejorative
Description: ‘Vermithrax Pejorative’ is the name the
filmmakers behind Dragonslayer gave to the dragon that appears on the film. I
like it, it’s weird, and it’s catchy. And in my opinion, old Vermithrax is the
best damn dragon I’ve seen on any film, and there have been some cool ones out
there, but Vermithrax takes the taco as the meanest baddest, most realistic one
of the bunch. Kudos to the filmmakers for making such a great looking monster
way back in 1981, when there was no such thing as computer generated images.
The dragon was achieved through the use of various effects techniques such as
stop motion animation, puppets, animatronics, and miniature work. A truly
amazing piece of work, and a vastly underrated film. Dragonslayer remains one
of my favorite fantasy films of all time.
Quote: “In fact, if it weren’t for sorcerers, there wouldn’t
be any dragons. Once, the skies were dotted with them. Magnificent horned
backs, leathern wings, soaring…and their hot breathed wind. Oh, I know this
creature of yours…Vermithrax Pejorative. Look at these scales, these ridges.
When a dragon get’s this old, it knows nothing but pain. It grows, decrepit,
crippled, pitiful, spiteful! ”
Film: Howard the Duck (1986)
Creature: Dark Overlords of the Universe
Description: The Dark Overlords of the Universe are these
demon-like creatures that come from a place called “Nexus of Sominus” or
something like that and they want to come to earth and take over. In order to
do so, they need to use a machine that these human scientists have created that
can open worm holes to other parts of the universe! These Dark Overlords look
like a mix between a giant crab and a giant scorpion…on acid! They can shoot
paralyzing rays of energy from their tail! They shoot tentacles from their
claws! They can blow things up with their eyes! They are monstrous in nature,
but in order to hide their true form, they can hide inside of a human body. These
creatures were brought to life through the magic of stop motion animation by
the hands of the great Phil Tippett, one of the few stop motion animation
masters left on this planet. Tippett’s crossed the frontier from stop motion to
computer animation, sadly, but I loved the stuff he used to do with this art
form in films like Willow
(1988) and Robocop 2 (1990). The Dark Overlords of the Universe are just one of
his many stop motion animation creations.
Quote: “I have disguised my true form, which would be
considered hideous and revolting here”
Film: Willow
(1988)
Creature: The Eborsisk
Description: The Eborsisk is a two headed dragon that is
born out of magic. Willow
is a sorcerer’s apprentice who’s desperate; he needs something to give him the
upper hand in the fight against Bavmorda’s henchmen; so he uses the corpse of a
troll to concoct this strange creature with the help of a magical wand
belonging to a good witch called ‘Cherlindrea’. So it's because of Willow that The Eborsisk comes to be! Coolest part about the monster is not that it’s a
dragon, but that it’s a fire breathing dragon! Unfortunately, The Eborsisk doesn’t
know good guys from bad guys, so even the good guys end up fighting against it.
Quote: “Don’t play with that wand, its got vast powers! Only
a real sorcerer can use it, not a stupid peck like you!”
Film: Clash of the Titans (1981)
Creature: Medussa
Description: Medussa is also known as ‘The Gorgon’, one look
from her eyes will turn any man who looks into stone. Her blood is so venomous,
that it will in fact melt metal! Oh and another thing, she has snakes on her
head! On the film, Perseus, the son of Zeus must cut off her head to use it as
a weapon against the all powerful six armed under water behemoth known as The
Kraken. Medusa has appeared in various films dealing with Greek Mythology
amongst them Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief (2010) and the new Clash of
the Titans (2010), but even though these more recent versions use better
effects, I still find Ray Harryhausen’s portrayal of the character to be the
best, it’s just so spooky!
Quote: “You must win Medussa’s head. She’s not going to give
it to you as a present. As difficult and as dangerous as to vanquish a thousand
Kraken’s!”
Film: Ghostbusters (1984)
Creature: Slimer
Description: This ghastly creature is a harmless little
ghost that starts out by spooking the Ghostbusters when they first encounter
him in the hallway of a haunted hotel. It is Peter Venkman who has a close
encounter with it. He is not an evil entity like most of the ghosts that the
Ghostbusters have to deal with, all Slimer cares about is eating. Strange part
is that since he has no stomach (remember, Slimer’s a ghost) when he eats
anything it just falls right to the floor. He is known for running straight
into human beings and sliming them with his protoplasmic residue. By
Ghostbusters II, slimmer is sort of a pet to the Ghostbusters, apparently it regularly
resides at the Ghostbusters HQ
Quote: “He slimed me!”
Film: Army of Darkness (1993)
Creature: Demonite and Pit Hag/Witch
Description: Again, this is another film filled with strange
creatures, but these two stand out amongst all the others. The Pit Hag is
awesome, it’s this witch who apparently lives in a dungeon filled with water,
waiting for her masters to through tender morsels like Ashley J. Williams, also
known as ‘Ash’, down to her. She has white eyes, huge claws and a big ass haid,
she’s also going bald for some reason, I guess she must be reaching middle age.
Then we have this Demonite thing that snatches Ash’s mid-evil girlfriend Sheila
and whisks her away to the hands of ‘Evil Ash’ the leader of the titular Army
of Darkness, I love this creature because it’s got a very demonic look to it.
Quote: “Into the pit with those blood thirsty sons of
whores!”
Film: King Kong (2005)
Creature: Giant Man Eating Worms
Description: When I first saw this movie I was blown away by
these scenes that take place in Skull
Island Skull
Island
Quote: “Monsters belong in B-Movies”
Film: Men in Black 3 (2012)
Creature: Boris the Animal
Description: These Men in Black films are filled to the brim
with tons of aliens and monsters, but Boris the Animal was one of my favorites
from this third film. What made him stand out? Well, for starters he is so
dangerous that he has to be kept in a high security prison…on the moon! Second,
he can shoot these bones out of his hands, that shoot out as if they were bullets.
If he gets caught up in trouble, these spiderlike creatures crawl out of his
hands and save him…he also time travels and has an awesome chopper; he ends up
being one of the most formidable villains that J and K ever faced.
Quote: “Look at you, every mistake I ever made just waiting
to happen!”
If you enjoyed this article, you might enjoy parts I and II
which showcase even more strange creatures from filmland!
The Brain from Planet Arous (1957)
