Will Miss #470 - respect for older people (conditionally)

If I allowed comments, I'm sure I'd get a torrent of people talking about how the Japanese no longer surrender their seats to old people on trains and that the old style traditional respect has been vanishing. This would be true. However, in general, the Japanese still show more respect for the older members of their society than Americans as well as have more regard for those who are simply older than themselves. This is something I've been witnessing firsthand here and did so similarly there. On a family basis in particular, Japanese people seem to spend more time with and have closer relationships with their older relatives. They generally visit more often and have more meaningful contact and regard their older relatives as people of value. This is due in large part to Confucianism, which forms a big part of the backbone of relationships in Japanese culture. In the U.S., many young people after exiting the innocence of childhood have little interest in anyone older than them and live life as if aging translates into becoming boring at best, and, at worst, older folks are often viewed as either a resource to tap, or a burden to tolerate.

On an individual basis (as opposed to a society-wide issue), the Japanese still show a good deal more respect for the elderly and regard for people who are older than them than those in America and I miss that.

*Note that while I'm making this post based purely on my subjective experience in Japan, a study conducted between Americans and Koreans in regards to respect for the elderly showed that the only point on which Americans showed more regard for older folks than Koreans was in physical contact upon greeting (e.g., hugging) and this is likely a cultural difference as Americans touch more than many Asian cultures. Koreans are actually more respectful of the elderly than Japanese, but the study I read indicated that Americans are very low in their actions that show regard for the elderly in terms of nearly all other points (language, physical and verbal care, respecting or heeding advice, etc.). 

Will Miss #393 - "akapantsu"

I'm not a big subscriber to the "weird Japan" mentality. One of the reasons I don't get so into it is that so much of it is clearly manufactured to be novel (e.g., maid cafes) and is little different than similarly generated oddness in other cultures which links not to human nature, but calculated commercial interests. However, when the weirdness manifests as a small component of a larger "normal" aspect of culture, my interest is piqued, and that is where we arrive at "akapantsu" or "red underpants". Sugamo is an area of Tokyo with a shopping district, Jizo Dori, which is described as an old folks Harajuku. The shops carry items of interest to the grey-haired set, but they also sell red underwear which is popular because the color red has positive associations in Buddhism. In particular, it wards off disease. So, many elderly flock to the red undies store and purchase over a million of them a year in order to gird their loins with red hot undergarments.

I will miss this odd contradiction in the conservative nature of older Japanese people and the way they dress and behave with an attraction to buying colorful and flashy underwear.

Will Miss #163 - extended family concept

In the U.S., there is a negative stereotype associated with being an adult child who lives with his parents. In Japan, that's simply the norm for many people. The family here isn't parents and children. It's often parents, children, and grandparents. This concept means that elderly parents are cared for by their kids until such time as their medical needs exceed the families ability to care for them. During the years when grandchildren are growing up, the grandparents often act as extra caregivers and babysitters. It lessens the burden on parents during the hardest years of child-rearing. I realize that living with in-laws is hard at times, but the very idea that family will remain together changes the way in which people approach their relationships and makes them emphasize getting along and understanding one another as well as possible.

I think this concept is more humane and natural than the Western concept which is based on the earliest possible independence and later isolation in life, and I'll miss it.

Won't Miss #102 - angry and rude old people

Something is happening with old people in Japan and it's being reflected in increasing numbers of social problems related to them. They are committing more crimes and becoming more aggressive over incidental things (like improperly sorted trash or unavoidable noise). Over the 20 years I've been in the same neighborhood, I've noticed a marked increase in rude and angry old people. I was attacked (for no discernible reason) a few years back by an old man who tried to shove me off my bike, but it's more than that one disturbing incident. Old people are just plain angrier than they used to be. I suspect this is related to the loss of the extended family, early retirement age relative to longevity (and having nothing better to do than to focus on minutiae), the ballooning number of elderly people and fewer (grand)children being born.

I won't miss the increased frequency with which I encounter angry or ill-mannered old folks in my neighborhood.

Will Miss #77 - senior driver warnings

Japan has done something that the AARP would never allow in the United States. It has created a system which tags senior drivers with a decal (currently a tear drop which is half orange and yellow, but this will change soon). This allows other people who see them to exercise some caution because of the different driving habits of older people. Japan recognizes and acts on a reality, and that's that as one gets older, one loses some capability and it may be a problem for others.

I'll miss the fact that Japan puts safety before political or ego concerns of the elderly.