ting:

to my darling chicken rice: i thought of you today, but i don't know if it counts as me missing you. it wasn't anything intense, but i hope your memory won't come back to haunt me for the rest of this year.

huge thanks to vin for standing outside the tutorial room long after tute was over to listen to me whine.

sometimes, it feels like my life is flipping out of control. it feels like i'm trying to right a car without having the luxury of a steering wheel.

i feel like i'm digging a hole with a toothpick. no matter how hard i try, or how hard i work, at the end of the day when i stand back to survey what i've done, the hole i see isn't even enough for an ant to squeeze through.

it doesn't mean that if you make a good friend, you make a good everything else.

diligence and faithfulness in whatever you do. that was what my pastor was stressing on during sermon last sunday.

i'm so confused i don't even know what i'm confused about.

sent it today, i can't believe it'll take approximately TWO WEEKS!!

i ought to get a punching bag to hang in my living room.

i apologise in advance if i:
1. snap at anyone in the next two weeks.
2. ignore you when i see you around in uni.
3. walk around like a dying duck.
4. not talk to you even if i'm just beside you.
5. treat you as a physical punching bag.

i'm not mad at anyone or anything. i'm just tired. and stressed.

year two is a complete fiasco. what would year three be like?

note to ira: hope you get your mess sorted out too. i'll be here if you should need me yeah? and if you want me to slap someone for you, i'll be more than happy to. if you need to run away from that irritating someone, my door is always open. i hope he turns into a cat, then maybe he'll stop bugging you. i mean, cats can't possibly understand microeconomics can they?

the most ridiculous statement i've heard my whole life: "if i think like a cat, will i become one?"

ting:

"A BLOODY, BRILLIANT MASTERPIECE

Gone are the malevolent creepy crawlies and the slimy body parts. Gone is the fetish with body horror that marks a typical David Cronenberg film. Yet, in so many ways, A History of Violence is as biological as the director's earlier works, such as Dead Ringers (1988). It's also the Canadian auteur's most compelling film since The Fly (1986). Based on the graphic novel by Vince Locke and John Wagner, the story revolves around Tom Stall (Viggo Mortensen), an ordinary Joe with an ordinary family running an ordinary diner in an ordinary town. That's a lot of ordinary.

It's a postcard existence straight out of Pleasantville - until two thugs show up one day and hold up his restaurant. Then all hell breaks loose. In one swift action, Stall disarms the gangsters and shoots them dead with the trained movements of an assassin. Lauded by the media as a hero, he soon discovers strange men turning up at his door and threatening his family, including a man with a glass eye (Ed Harris in a scene-stealing role) who insists Stall was the man who had blinded and scarred him years ago.

Stall, it seems, is not all he's made out to be. As his name implies, he's merely stalling for time, living out the American Dream while concealing a dark past. After the relatively slow-moving and uneven Spider (2002), Cronenberg has certainly returned to form.

Less showy than his previous films - his only concession to gore is to allow the camera to linger on bullet wounds just long enough to shock - A History of Violence brings into sharp relief all his favourite themes: The past and how it shapes identity; the Darwinian relationship between sex and violence.

Towards this end, Cronenberg is ably supported by a superb cast that includes Maria Bello as Tom's wife and William Hurt as his brother. Hurt, in particular, may well earn himself a nomination for Best Supporting Actor when Oscar season comes round. Even though the actor's screen time adds up to no more than 15 minutes, he makes every second count, with his conniving smile and snarling delivery. Mortensen, as usual, is solid and dependable, updating his reluctant hero persona from The Lord of the Rings trilogy.

Essaying Tom Stall with an edgy pathos, he immediately invites comparisons with Clint Eastwood in the Oscar-winning Unforgiven (1992). Indeed, it would not be far-fetched to describe A History of Violence as Cronenberg's take on Unforgiven, a meditation on violence and its self-destructive trail in a world gone keenly mad with rage. Definitely one of the best films of 2005."

---Today, 8/12/2005

managed to squeeze some time out of my hectic schedule to watch a history of violence. i can definitely see why the singapore newspapers rated it 5 stars. can also see why the singapore censorship board rated it R21, it was bloody gruesome!

definitely an enjoyable watch. :) viggo just oozes sex appeal, despite the fact he is no longer aragorn.

but for now, it'll be back to trying to complete my tute work for tomorrow, and then my marketing assignment, consumer behaviour assignment, intro econometrics assignment (all due next week) and studying for my intermediate micro mid-sem test (also happening next week).

melbourne uni is a freaking murderer.

ting:

"love is what's left when being in love has gone, okay? it's when you care about someone and you hope they're happy, but you're not under any illusions about them. maybe that kind of love is not exciting and passionate and all those things that fade with time. all those things that you're so keen on. but in the end, it's the only kind of love that really matters."

--"man and boy", tony parsons

i ought to be doing marketing readings now.. have 5 chapters to complete before tomorrow. instead, am stuck on the quiz i got off adel's blog.

is there a country/state/city named wega?? why does wega sound so familiar? if it isn't wega, i seriously can't find any other country/state/city name. ughhhhhhh.

can someone in melbourne fall in love?? i'm bored and i need some entertainment. the only entertainment i get nowadays is teasing eny about alex and vice versa. BUT i can't see them interact, so i'm just guessing based on what hui/alex/eny tells me. heh.

either someone fall in love or i get myself an eye candy. someone who'd provide me with motivation to go to uni, to dress up, to look forward to classes and bumping into him, to provide me with that cheap thrill i get when he actually makes eye contact with me, smile at me or talk to me.

i miss jc life. that was when we had all our eye candies. i miss stalking monkey. :(

Hui:

on a second thought and suggestion by jac, i may not be going for D&D. i may be heading to KL with jac and justin. and perhaps mandy. since both justin and mandy are from KL, they can show us around. jac was saying that if we'll be spending a lot on e D&D, we might as well go KL.. wah sounds cool man. anyway project will definitely release us early on that day, and we can take a coach there. will be staying at justin's place if we go. hmm.. but at e same time i wan to go D&D also leh, see how is it like. ahhh how.. nvm la, i try to ask if i can go.. if cannot.. then go D&D lor.. this was decided when i was having lunch with jac and justin.

jac needed justin's pic to make a security pass for him.. but he has no pic in jpeg format. solution? i look a pic of justin standing against a white background and emailed jac. hahaha =P and guess wad? she replied to my mail, marked with high importance and say that i MUS get my passport. and at e same time, justin assigned a task to me in MS Outlook. the task name is "Get passport" hahaha.. funny la them. i have yet to show them my lameless. beginning to show bit by bit. =P

hanging out with e integration team makes me happy. i've nv been so happy even though i left e office at 1010pm jus now. couldn't find anyone to go out with on a friday night. so decided to jus stay in e office and finish up my stuffs. received a call from jac saying that she'll be popping by from Rob and be staying here. bumped into kennie at level 33 and heard that tony's alone. invited him down to level 32 to sit with us. justin came back to e office while waiting for his friend. wah, happening man. we joked and had e whole office to ourselves. i finished my work, so wait for them to go dinner lor. sufed e web.. listened to songs.. shiok man, it felt as if its my house. haha.. e 3 of us (justin din join) went dinner at victoria street. quite fun la.. =D

will be going to alex's house to borrow his internet connection to do my portal backup. i din noe my portal grew so fast sia. i did backup last week and it took me abt 27hours to finish it. sian.. we're coming up with a new approach, and will be testing our POC on monday. hope it works!

JB CHEAPSKATE!! booo!!

Hui:

woohoo~~ its friday!! though i still have abt 18hrs to official knock-off time =p

another week jus whizzed past like that.

D&D coming soon.. less than a month's time. i hope the seating plan won't suck as much as my project's D&D last year dec. and hopefully i dun get to meet someone like jb this time. sigh. time to worry abt how and what i should do on that day. like going back home to get changed and stuffs like that. ma fan.. nvm lar, i'll think abt that again when e time is nearer. though i have yet to go shop for stuffs. haha

y do i (still) feel so weird when i hear jb's name? y am i (still) afraid that i'll see him/he'll see me? jb sux.

need to go plan my weekend liao.. woohoo~

ting:

ira said i am easy to talk to and hence, that is why people open up to me so easily.

is that true??

so maybe the next time i need counselling myself, i ought to talk to the image i see in the mirror. that's a thought.

am starting to think i'm in the wrong course. i should be doing psychology!!

busy feeling sad for three people now.

random topic, but it's a really good thing hui and i NEVER fall for the same guy. our tastes are too different. which is immensely fortunate. i can't think of how it'll be like if the guy i like equals the guy she is thinking of. oh man, that would really, really suck. hui, what would you do if it ever comes down to that?

should start on my assignment. it's due thursday. sigh.

Hui:

quite a lot of pictures to be posted for this entry. will let the pictures do e rest of the talking at end of this entry.

let's start with friday. last post was abt waiting for justin and his team. wah, finally they are ready. his team is hilarious man, so much more interesting than mine. while on the way to somerset for supper, they were teasing kennie (someone from his team) with the gal that JB is currently going after. funny enough, they ask me wad i think of her. haha.. wad am i supposed to say? i said she's pretty. well, she is pretty.. as for character wise, i dunno.. cos i dunno her personally.

Went irene's house for her baby's full month celebration yesterday. took pictures with Queenie (baby's name). dare not carry her at first.. no experience in carrying babies that are so young. no confidence in myself. but i carried her in the end, cos i wanna take picture with her. was so afraid that i would hurt her. my friends said that i look worried and the way i carried her was weird. haha.. jialat, really no experience man.

was supposed to bring justin for dinner/supper at chomp chomp, but he was with his a couple of his friends at ikea doing shopping. got sale mah.. so we decided to meet at night instead. as i din wanna go home, i rang eny and went to her house with mei. kaput some mee goreng from eny as well. wahaha.. so nice man, her noodles. actually feel a bit paiseh la.. that she always have to cook noodles for me. but the noodles is too delicious to be missed le. sorry ah eny, haha =P

was supposed to hit wala wala at holland village by 11pm to meet justin and his friends. but was too lazy to leave eny's house.. and plus someone called mei and asked her if she wanna join him (and samuel) to some *ahem* "brokeback" pub in tanjong pagar. i wanna go man.. go see see look look. but i was unable to reject justin and gang and said im not going cos they have been waiting for me for abt 2-3hours.. they reach that place at 9pm. haha.. so i din join mei they all. heard that they hang out till 6am chatting in maxwell foodcourt. piang, damn near Rob Ctr lor. hmm, y am i mention Rob Ctr? o_O

anyways, finally reached wala wala and was surprised to see kennie there. he was surprised to see me as well. wahaha.. was quite relaxing to jus sit at wala wala listening to the live band. except that the music was blasting in my ears. nearly went deaf.

and as for today, supposed to join augus and keong for photo-shooting session.. augus wanted to test e new lens that he bought for his camera and i wanted to test the quality of the images of my d-cam. but sad to say, i din join them in the end. went for ktv session (at bishan) with mei, eny, alex and kelen and to mei's parents' chicken rice stall for dinner. while on e way to the carpark get alex's car after ktv, i forgot wad triggered us to go crazy, we all decided that alex should piggyback everyone of us. i think eny started it. as in she said something abt alex piggybacking one of us, and she told mei to try. after that alex gave eny a short ride on his back. alex told eny not to jump, he said eny sure can't reach one. hahaha.. anyway after e short ride, eny said that it was damn cushioned and comfy. tempted me sia, so i tried. i jumped on alex. wahaha, heng ah, it was a successful jump.

ahh, monday's coming! heck, let e pics do e talking now!


Queenie


Queenie and me! do i look stiff?



Justin and me


Eunice (justin's friend) and Kennie


Di and me~


Mei and di


Eny and me


Eny and me again


omg hamsters! damn act cute sia..


Eny's hasn't gotten over that hamster pose..


ok, this is a much better pose. if not sure get hoot.


Mei and me~~


Me pretending to sing and Eny being so engrossed =D


woops, where's mei?


wassup with kelen? seems like he dun wanna take pic with eny... hahahaa


finally persuaded kelen to take a pic with eny.. but can see that eny still not happy..


kelen and mei


kelen and me


mei and me again


woohoo~ di's got mei on his back!


he's got eny too!


*jump* victory sign!


even kelen can't resist the temptation


eny wants a second try. but too bad, she can't reach alex even though she as tried hard to jump. wahaha =x

ting:

don't quite know what's wrong with blogger, i can't seem to change the time and date (because it's set to singapore's time). it's already 2am here in melbourne, march 20th and would just like to shout out HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! to vinli. :D you go girl!! hope you had a great time tonight. :)

what a day. it started off really early, with jon, timothy, jo and myself having to WALK all the way to russell street to catch a tram to church. lousy tram services had to stop, ALL BECAUSE of the commonwealth games (they were holding the marathon in the city area and all traffic was re-directed). no thanks to that, we reached church 10 mins late, which i think is quite an achievement, given the fact we spent over half a hour walking all the way to the city.

after church came lunch with a HUGE group. because we were undecisive, decided to tag along with the entire international students clique and we ended up in some chinese restaurant who were obviously unaccustomed to dealing with so many customers at one go. we took up 3 tables, and each table seated about ten people. you could imagine their frenzy. haha...

after church, jon, jo, timothy and myself took a little trip to ikea, where we tested the level of comfort for almost every single sofa/armchair, and where the guys went bonkers on seeing ice cube trays. they weren't like your normal square ice cube trays, these came in shapes. like hearts, stars, arrows, crosses etc. the guys went nuts over these, unable to decide which shape and how many to get. gosh.. jo and i had a kick laughing our heads off at them and commenting that they're worse than girls.

met up with jey sen after that, then got ready for vinli's birthday celebration. :)

took a huge detour, from jo's place to ira's place to wait an impatient 10 mins for nimalan, then all the way to vin's place and all the way back to the tram stop outside jo's place after we decided where we were going for dinner. seems like technology is getting redundant, we have phones (where we can converse and decide where to go for dinner) and we don't use them.

huge group once again, i think there was around 18 of us this time. had to sit in a crammed space for dinner again (like lunch) and i think we were responsible for most (if not all) the noise in the restaurant. it doesn't feel so much like vin's party, because jo and i were the ones running around taking photos with everyone. heh. :)

got back to the city around eleven pm and half of us decided to go home. so vin and the other half of the group boarded the tram (we were heading in different directions) when we realised that jovan bought vinli a cake. i mean, the poor girl couldn't possibly cut her cake with like what? 5 people celebrating for her? so the rest of us changed our minds and made a last minute dash for the tram, which was going off. it stopped briefly to allow a couple of passengers to board it, then started again. we were running by the side of it, slamming on the doors to try and stop the driver but he ignored us. THEN! we realised that vin and the rest were actually on ANOTHER tram (not the one we were chasing) and were waving at us as they went past.

gosh. what a night.

ended up going back to vin's place after the rest of them and with jovan's cake, sprung a surprise on her. :D

i think it was past midnight when we left her place. thank God i had 4 other people for company, walking back to college square.

and now... photos to commemorate the day!

gelati rules the day... there were SEVEN different favours mind you!

half the group present for dinner

the whole bunch of us

i think this picture is SUPER freaky. looks like a ghost was in front of the camera don't you think? the "ghost" turned out to be pei fei, who was annoying the heck out of me by jumping in front of the camera everytime i wanted to take a photo with someone.

vin's birthday cake!

me trying to break a plastic knife

jovan trying his hand at it as well

jo ann, ira and myself with the birthday girl (who's in front)

one of vin's presents... i think it's super cool!

the whole bunch of us who were in vin's place for the cake cutting

Hui:

kns. justin make me wait so long. -_- going dinner with him. but guess its supper liao. thinking of bringing him to chomp chomp, even though it'll be super pack and i'll probably die of hunger by e time my food come.

managed to finish some of my stuffs, but i'm so sian now.

hmm, i musn't do any wrong thing, if not it'll be my IC who kanna..

piang, so hungry. dying liao. i go surf web.. byeee

Hui:

i'm a happier person today as compared to yesterday. =D =D

tot abt him and wad my colleague told me yesterday while i was on my way to work today. and jus when i was taking e escalator, i lifted by head and saw augus infront of me! wah, first time bump into him on e way to work wor. cos e closet time when we would reach the office together would be missing e lift. and we went for lunch together. usually it would be the 2 of us and paul, but paul went to collect his passport today and so he din join us for lunch. we went The Soup Spoon. augus is very nice.. ordered for me and helped me to get e waiter to pack my sandwich. haha i was too greedy lar, ordered e soup (which comes with a bun) and added $3.60 for a half sandwich (which comes with a drink). it was such a big bowl of soup and jus as when i was thinking "oh shit, dunno can finish e sandwich or not", e half sandwich was served. i looked at it in horror and did the "fainting" action. augus saw that and laughed. he asked me if i can finish, i said no. he then asked e waiter to pack that. saying "can we have this take-away? sorry abt that" wahaha so nice right? now i come to realise.. he kinda like to laff at wad i say. am i that lame? (yes ting and mei, i noe u will say yes) or is he laffing at me? =|

i almost died of heart attack today. i called CIO helpdesk and raised a request for a sub-site restoration as justin has done smeone drastic to the sub-portal. they have not gotten back to me and so i called again to ask for an update of e status. when i was on e phone with them, i received an email from e server team telling me that e sub-site cannot be restored and so they will go ahead restore the WHOLE site, and will get back to me when its done. wah, i super panic!! i cannot afford to restore e whole site back to what it was on Sunday! hundreds of ppl upload thousands of files and information every day, how can i afford to lose all that? i onli wan e sub-site back. super panic, i asked e CIO person to update and send an urgent note to them and ask them to stop. and i replied to e server team ask them to stop. i was damn worried and ken cheong, i had to call overseas directly to e person. onli then to find out that it is their normal practice that they restore e whole site to ANOTHER server, not e live and existing one that we are using. wah heng ah! i said in that case its ok, pls continue. haha piang, i took an hour odd to recover from e shock. if they restore e whole thing (*choi!! touch wood*) i'm e one who is going to cry.

changed my nick saying that i almost got a heart-attack and some lame ppl msg me some lame thing. haha i copied and pasted for mei. it was kk lar. lame lor, i really dunno wad is he toking abt.

thank god paul didn't irritate me today. or maybe *ding ding ding* tolerance level up!

actually wanted to go xbox launch with justin and perhaps a few members from his team today. but didn't go in e end cos he has meeting and i need to finish up some stuffs. he called after his meeting and ask wan to go dinner or not (with other ppl also la) but i was feeling quite tired liao. lazy also.. so nv go lor..

anyway, received quite some calls (abt 3 but very good liao) from augus while he was at Rob. wahaha.. haiz, mus draw flow chart.. lousy at drawing.. need those to guide paul on my tasks that were passed to him. mus be idiot proof!! and a few user manual for some of e users. trust me, i'll be so good in explaining stuffs after i have come up with all these charts and manuals. die la, i dunno how to treat ppl as idiot, how to come out with idiot proof manuals?

raa, meeting change from thurs 11.30am to 9am. wth?! so early!! i mus sleep early and wake up early and reach office early liao! shit man, have yet to update my tasks.. stressed ah..

thanks to jac, i think she told (almost) everyone whom i have slightly closer contact with that my bday is on e 1st april, ie april fool's day. i get some ppl asking me "oie, ur bday 1st april, april fool's day ah?" -_- i had to explain and say "no la.. its not my actualy bday." booo.....

i gonna go to bed soon and wake up early to get ready for e 9am battle tml! raa~! i'll show u wad i'm made of! lameless is wad i'm made of. so.. raa~~ lame si ni!!

ting:

alex says he loves me, but he isn't doing anything to prove it. in fact, he's gonna ditch me (ie. la trobe uni) for arthur leung (ie. queensland university of technology)!!!

ten reasons why he should join me in melbourne instead of going over to brisbane to kill(?) arthur:

1. he can cook for me. don't belittle this guy's culinary skills.. everytime we have a BBQ back home, he's the one who sits in front of the BBQ pit and sweat it out. :)

2. he can drive me around. hey... what's a driving license for right? :)

3. he can protect me!! wahahahha.. no one's gonna dare bully me when alex lim is around.

4. him coming over here would kill two birds with one stone.. when hui and the rest come over to melbourne to visit me, they can visit him too! we can drive around and explore the region together then... i mean, how inconvenient it would be if hui had to go to BOTH melbourne AND brisbane for the both of us right? though i know who ranks supreme in her priority list. *smirks*

5. i'll have company on my long, never-ending flights... with alex around, 7.5 hours ain't a problem!

6. there'll be someone in melbourne who knows me relatively well... i mean, we've known each other for 6 going 7 years!

7. having a good friend cum fella singaporean with you would rock.

8. i'll have someone to turn to when i need help/a listening ear. and beyond a question of doubt, he'd cheer me up by saying/doing something totally lame or funny which would crack me up.

9. we can have stayovers!! and expand our social circle... i can get to know people from la trobe and he can make friends with people in melb uni.

10. for the simple of simplest reasons... i love my gor and i want him here with me.

i think these are reasons enough. those who approve, do me a favour and pressurise alex into joining me!! hui... i'm depending on you now. :)

Hui:

went IT Fair with alex di. got my d-cam!! woohoo~~! thanks everyone who has a share in it!! =D


its mine!!


*yay*


slim?


whee~

===============================================================================

i invited my cousin (zi ann) and his gf to e cafe on e first.. din noe that he told his parents, who are my uncle and aunt. and they went to get an early gift for me yesterday. something from SK. its a set.. necklace and earrings..


===============================================================================

raaa, work again tml.

i'm afraid of may. i mean e motnh may. cos augus would be rolling-off from my team and going to other teams. he may be going to hk ah. tt'll be good for him. wad im afraid is... how can i survive w/o him?! die liao.. dunno y i keep having a feeling tt my manager doesn't seen to like me or think highly of me.. hope it isn't so =|

ok la, back to e conference chatting window with ting, alex and kelen. =)

Hui:

ting got dc! she's nowhere to be seen. think she has gone to bed already.

guess wad..? i didn't manage to wake up early. lili la.. didn't wake me up. actually i set alarm at 9am.. but i turned it off when it rang, cos i tot lili would wake me up. i wasn even late in meeting jac at RCT. she called at 1150am and i jus woke up. chiong down to suntect to meet her (and augus). actually was supposed to be at RCT at around 1230-1pm. wasn't expecting augus to be there, cos i tot he would skip e beanie rehearsal. anyway, e 3 of us went IT Fair at Suntec together. i saw something which was really tempting. digital camera Casio EX-Z60. 6mega pixels, anti-shake, 3x optical zoom. even augus said its not bad too! free gifts include 512mb SD card, tripod, case and cleaning kit. all these for $499! i've checked out e other cameras, and they dun seem to be as good as this.. if not they are more expensive. hmm.. very tempting.. but if i buy i would have to eat grass for 2 months liao. am thinking of mei they all can share to chip in a little for me? haha =x *dun wan face* but i think i will buy la.. i have now till tml to think abt it. alex wants to go to the IT show and i'll tag along. should i?? i was thinking if i buy, i can use it on 1st april and maybe at e D&D..

finally get e thing settled. i mean e booking of cafe on e 1st. thank god jac and augus were there. they really help me a lot. woe them a big one. augus asked some questions which nv came across my mind. brilliant. jac went off and augus and i took train back together. dunno how to describe e feeling. weird. is it a good thing? maybe not..

suddenly dun feel like going work on monday. i feel there is a pile of work that will be assigned to me. haha.. wad's wrong with me man.. say dun wan slack, now got work dun wan to do. but.. how to say ah.. i dun wan those like fuking busy until no time to eat and always OT one. boo~

sian sian nothing to do.. i go continue chatting liao..

ting:

pei invented this phrase quite a while ago, which i really really like. so.. credits to her.

"nothing hurts more than careless disregard."

can't help but wonder why i'm feeling disappointed when things turn out the exact way i visualise them to be.

am gonna refrain from blogging for the time being. mood hasn't been all that good recently.

just a note before i go on hiatus:

i don't expect you to return me any favours. or to give me what i gave you. but the least you could do is show a teeny weeny bit of appreciation. and not just come running when you need me.

Hui:

this is getting way too scary and way too out of hand. i've never imagined myself in this situation. now what? i dunno wad am i feeling, i dunno if i'm ready to move on, or i'm jus trying too hard to move on. thinking of the few incidents that came across and me thinking it thru, i'm doubting myself. ting and mei already knew my concern (cos was chatting with them thru msn) at work. opps. wahaha.. and, oh.. am reminded of a joke ting and i cracked. dunno eny likes zihao/arthur or zihao/arhur likes her leh? was telling mei abt it. wahahaha =x

have been "slacking" during work. am waiting for new tasks to me passed to me.. i dun like e feeling of being kinda/too free. i feel so unproductive. so i went ahead with my ideas of webpage design, e one desktop page which my manager/ex-manager has been idealising. kinda headache over e design ah.. something not graphic intensive (cos they wanna consume bandwidth and keep e loading time as low as possible), user-friendly and appealing. not graphic intensive how to be nice leh? unless i'm super good in html, so good such that i can come out with a nice one w/o e help of any graphics except for my company logo. =|

work today is kinda sian.. maybe cos of wad i mentioned in e above. and perhaps cos justin's not on msn to tok to me. he's really crappy la.. actually am thinking if i should bring him go chomp chomp for food. he complain singapore no good food. kns.. let me think think sin.. maybe when i have e guts, i'll bring this idea up to him next week. he's back in his hometown over e weekend this week.

apart from e little "boredom", i spent an hour or so looking information on how to pass querystring to aspx pages to display some hidden data. IC came to help a little. this was some tasks we (actually is me la) have been assigned to do abt 2-3 weeks ago. i didn't have enuff technical background on doing it so i procrastinated it. =x anyway, wad i wan to say is that... we spent some time looking at e codes and then my IC found out that there is already a way to do it w/o writing abt code. it was to use some of e built-in feature. raaa~~ both of us wanted to faint liao. y did we think until so complex? but i mus say that he is really good. and nice =) and JUST as he has taught me how to to solve tt problem, e manager who assigned this task to me called and asked me if that issue has been fixed. woohoo~~ my saviour! simply love him. i mean my IC la.. wahaha

went ktv with jac and other 2 colleagues yesterday. from hk. ok, one of them is from hk office and e other one's from aust office. think she's from hk originally, cos she knows cantonese! din intend to sing a cantonese song for my first song, as i was afraid that i'm not really good at the pronunciation. my intention was blown when one of them needed someone to sing Si Xing Bu Gao by Twins and Boyz with her, and i was like e onli one who know that song. so bo bian sing lor, after that i heck liao. all e way sing cantonese songs.. anyhow sing somemore. was tired.. started at around 9 end at 1am sia. they're really good at looking for songs.. they can find most of e songs that i cannot find.. power.. chatted with jac said she mentioned tt they din say anything abt my pronunciation. guess that's good la. haha.. or maybe its cos my pronunciation cannot make it so they din bother to say anything. =x i noe my standard.. i think accuracy in pronunciation onli abt 80% bah..

i gonna declare bankrupt in april. paying for e bday celebration is enuff to kill. on top of that, i have D&D to attend. this time, its not project-based D&D with client. its jus purely company's own D&D. think it'll be fun. i hope contractors on e project i'm working on will be joining too.. this invitation actually goes out to all personnel in this company who are in singapore.. including expatriates. hmm. u noe wad i'm getting at. but then.. it doesn't matter la. =)

dunno y super tired today.. guess will be heading to bed soon.. (soon? since when did i make "soon" happen?) wahaha, anyway plans tml will be bringing my grandparents + lili for breakfast, then head down to RCT (dun be alarmed, not to work) look for jac. she said she'll be seeing the newbies (my company call them green beans. so cute!!) doing rehearsal. not that she wan to see, but cos she has to be there.. dunno y also. so guess i'll jus drop by look for her, then lunch, and she'll accompany me to go Mind Cafe to ask for quotation. she scared i dunno how to negotiate and i kanna cheated $$. haha.. hopefully there'll be eye candies for me! since all should be young and capable analysts, surely there'll bound to be one who's good-looking? eh eh maybe kennie or the dimple-guy will be there! whee~ =D

*siao liao* how come i sound so guy-craze recently? maybe i shouldn't try too hard hor.. =P but then again, i din intend to focus attention on *ahem*. *ahem* = e person i was telling ting and mei. wahaha =x

oh damn, someone's online. heck. curse. i wish him DIE!

am listening to edmond leung's songs. sudden crush for him now. haha.. all his songs very nice ah!

piang, cannot tahan liao.. eyes closing.. byebye!!

ting:

am regretting my decision to get out of bed today.

just when you think "can this day get any worse?", something happens to prove to you it really CAN.

i overslept slightly today(due to the fact i was having the weirdest dream ever), so had to half run half walk to uni. hurried all the way only to discover, pinned boldly on the door of my tutorial class, this notice informing us the tutorial has been cancelled. so basically, i woke up an hour earlier for nothing, and i wasted all the energy rushing to uni.

managed to change out of my thursdays micro slot (the one with the shitty tutor) to a slot on wednesday. was on the way to check who is tutoring which slot and who my new tutor would be when i bumped into jon who urgently told me to change out of the slot i changed into. turns out that the exact same tutor is tutoring that slot! sometimes, i wonder if fate enjoys toying around with me like i'm a puppet attached to its strings.

so went to fiddle around with the tutorial allocation system and guess what? the only available slot is on tuesdays, at 5.15pm. so now, my tuesdays absolutely suck. i start classes at 9am and end at 6.15pm. PLUS, i have a 4 hour break inbetween. isn't life gonna be incredibly brilliant?

to top it all off, my microeconomics lecture sucked like crazy today. halfway through, i had this insane urge to throw something at the professor, something pointed and sharp and shiny, something which starts with a letter k. it is bad enough you don't provide us with lecture notes (because apparently, he doesn't believe in duplicating the textbook), but can't you have the decency to at least write properly!?? he was being so random today, jumping from drawing one diagram to another, not bothering about poor old us who are trying to understand the inter-relationships between all the diagrams. then, his handwriting went haywire. every single student was squinting at the screen, trying to figure out what the heck the words were. the word "price" came out looking like "puke". even the stranger sitting next to me had to peek at my notes.

STOP RUINING MY FAVOURITE SUBJECT DAMN YOU!!! he's not even giving us solutions to our tutorial questions!!!

after he finally let us off, ira and i saw the guy who was sitting next to me sitting on the stairs and looking immensely depressed. he looked so down and out i wanted to approach him to ask him if he was ok. he was still there 15 minutes later, when i was running around uni trying to get a tutorial swap. guess we aren't the only ones affected huh?

bumped into the guys and realised the day COULD get worse when nimalan put his arm around me and called me darling. it was all in jest of course, but i was spooked out nonetheless. now, i just want to throw myself at any guy along the street to prove to him i do NOT like him.

somehow, i have this feeling year two is gonna be a colossal nightmare. for now, i just want to crawl into bed and stay there for, preferrably, the rest of eternity.

ting:

i'm so depressed now it isn't even funny. all my tutors suck this sem. what is wrong with the world?

if i can't get out of my mirco tutorial slot, i'll kill myself. seriously. it is THAT bad. i think vin and i were almost in tears... immediately after our tute, we went to ira's tute because we had NO IDEA what the %*^#$*#&$(*#($ our tutor was saying.

i'm so depressed i can't even cry.

i miss clare. i want her back. unfortunately for me, i went to check up on which tutor is taking which slot and i realised she isn't teaching anymore this sem. NOT even the introductory classes. wahhhhh! well, no surprise, because she already told me she was contemplating not teaching this year. but i was hoping against hope she'd reconsider.

sigh.

my consumer behaviour tutor is from china and makes grammatical/vocab errors when she speaks. is that suppose to give me confidence that she is competent enough to grade my assignments, especially the english component?

my econometrics tutor is probably the best of the lot (and i use this phrase loosely). at least he appears to know what he is talking about, though i don't quite get him. sigh. looks like i've gotta double or even triple my studying efforts this sem eh?

marketing tute tomorrow. please God, give me a miracle! i can't possibly survive with FOUR tutors who might as well be jabbering in french.

seem to be meeting a lot of singaporeans lately. which is so weird, considering i didn't cross paths with any in my faculty last year. it's like they are all starting to pop up only now. met this guy in one of my tutorials who looked at me and asked me if i am singaporean, because apparently, he recognises me from some seminar. oh my gosh.

in other really weird news, nimalan spent the whole of lunch hour yesterday and today insisting i like him. how come i never knew that? we had a wager going on (because he insists that there is no such song by air supply called "all out of love". and if he lost, which he did, he is suppose to give me 3 dinner treats) and when i reminded him of what he owes me, he said i like him and was only using this as an excuse to date him. he also kept reassuring me that he'd give me chances. erm... right. then again, coming from a guy who thinks a girl was trying to hit on him JUST BECAUSE they made eye contact for one second, what less could i expect from him?

seeing him now just makes me want to run miles.

and i feel like boycotting someone. but i know that when the time comes, i probably wouldn't, because i'd feel guilty. damn you, conscience.

Hui:

slacked whole day at e office today. was not really busy like usual. damn rare. reason being in e midst of handing over most of my recurring operational tasks to paul and there isn't much urgent/escalation situation today. and also waiting for the new tasks to come to me. well, when those tasks come to me, i'll be super busy already.. one of e tasks which i see will take up whole lot of my time is to managing ppl for access control. raa... and to go into each link on the portal to change e permission. siao man, there are AT LEAST 285 links. ho sey bo?!

was exceptionally happy yesterday. ok la, i exaggerated. was rather delighted.. a long time since i felt this light-hearted. had dinner with justin and his team mates, those who i have communicated thru email or even thru phone b4.. but have never met up. yesterday was really fun. full of crap and intelligent jokes. i like! there's one guy whom i think is quite ok lah.. haha =x

thurs tml... got meeting... raa.. stress.. nothing much on my task list cos waiting for tasks mah.. hope boss dun niao me. will be going ktv with jac and 2 other colleagues whom i've never seen/talked to b4.. all gals.. one of them is frm hongkong. will be very particular abt my cantonese pronunciation liao. scared throw face.

sian... dunno y tot of him again. =(

go sleep liao.. nites..

ting:

this entry is to celebrate me regaining connection to the rest of the world. finally solved whatever LAN problems my computer had by re-installing the entire operating cd and wheeeeee! i'm back!

introductory econometrics is disgusting. i had completely NO CLUE what BOTH my tutor and lecturer were talking about today. argghhhh! this is when i'll start missing ber like crazy. i no longer have a good friend cum maths genius by my side to patiently answer my never-ending maths questions. :(

watched brokeback mountain yesterday. aim to watch all the movies singapore rates R21 here, because here, they're only rated M15! like what the heck right? and a history of violence is gonna be screening from next week onwards too. yay! :) brokeback mountain was..... interesting. i wonder if they actually start doubting their sexuality while filming the movie. i have to give them credit though.. they are more than sporting to roll around with another guy in front of a camera. for more in-depth details about the movie, refer to jo's blog.

spent sunday at church (which was awesome as usual), then with daniel and jo ann. am still astounded we managed to talk the entire day without running out of things to say. daniel also spent some time showing off his newly acquired magic skills, which are really good i might add. you should have seen the expression on our faces when he revealed the results with a flourish. woah... and he was nice enough to share SOME of the tricks with us. really interesting.. shall try it on my friends (assuming i still remember how to do them) when i get back to singapore. :)

i'm hungry and there's nothing in my fridge. why is it that no matter how much groceries i buy, i still feel that there is nothing in my fridge?

Hui:

sometimes its too scary to find so many similarities between a friend and e person u MIGHT fall for. maybe i should rephrase.. between a friend whom i dun really like and e person who helps me so much.

went for jol's bday chalet on friday after work. didn't wan to declare war but she die-hard come and disturb me with cakes and cream. -_- i was wearing heels and skirt.. but since she declared war, i took off my heels and ran after her.. went home on friday night, and went again on sat evening. wanted to go ktv at night but the nearest ktv at kbox (which is at tampines) opens until 2am. so went for couple of pool games instead. nothing happening, jus staying over and stuffs like tt.. maybe there are too many ppl at e chalet la.. and we had to keep our voices low cos jol's grandparents were at e next room and they need to rest..

had abt 4+ - 5h hours of sleep b4 hitching a ride from di to amk and heading down straight to orchard to meet my team (basically jac, paul., ah keong and augus) for Final Destination 3. din really want to watch.. but jac "booked" me since jan.. and she seems super enthu abt it.. somemore (almost) everyone is going.. so ok lor, go lor. (ok la, i din mean to sound so "fu yan") =P

went settlers' cafe after that. Settlers Cafe is a place where ppl can gather, enjoy food/drinks and play board games at e same time. thinking of holding my bday celebration there.. but think it'll be super ex.. and today the service isn't that good. and e food.. so-so lor. not very fantastic. i'm thinking it twice.. maybe should call and ask.. sad case.. ppl bday ppl help to book and plan.. mine?! guess no one from my family cares at 21st bday. even if they care, no one would help me out in planning, help me fork out money and stuffs like that. how sad right? planning my own bday celebration -_- but actually i did think of not celebrating. i mean, wad's e big deal with 21st day? doesn't matter to me bah.. though i noe its onli once in a lifetime when ppl REALLY celebrates it and invite friends. hmm, when it comes to e invitation part, i dun have that much friends too.. a lot more acquaintances than what i would call "friends". and by estimating e number of gifts i would receive vs e amt of money i have to spent on arranging a party for myself, i'ld perhaps suffer less loss than to buy myself something that i really want..

see how la, i have exactly a month to think.. sian..

show ya guys one lame thing.. this guy emailed me saying soemthing like he noe me or wad.. think is thru friendster or something like that la.. i emailed to ask him who he is.. he said he is Alvin Ang from pri sch. i was like thinking "huh? where got such person.. i noe meh?" but i find it such a hassle to keep emailing.. so i added him to msn.. and this is wad he msg me:

I'm starting to smell my PINK IC coming...... says:
u got no impression of me???
Estelio says:
no wor
Estelio says:
alvin ang?? from which class?
Estelio says:
did u get e correct person?
I'm starting to smell my PINK IC coming...... says:
are u suvin tan?
Estelio says:
no la =.=
I'm starting to smell my PINK IC coming...... says:
oops....
I'm starting to smell my PINK IC coming...... says:
wich sch u from

=====================================
then he dc liao. er xin lor.. tot i am suvin tan jie hui. suvin tan jie hui is my schmate who is from e next class during sec sch. dun really like her la.. act cute de.. haha =x

work work work tml! continous improvements to MS SharePoint awaits me.. formality in email blah blah blah.. managing access.. woohoo.. high liao la.. lets hope that it will be a better week. =)

ting:

the only reason i'm able to blog now (because college square and my laptop are having a slight conflict... can't get those two things to cooperate. hence.. no internet! :() is because... *takes deep breath*... i'm in uni now.

yes. on a SATURDAY. on the FIRST WEEK OF SEMESTER. or starting of the second week, as jo and ira constantly correct me. i feel geekified. i feel like i have NO LIFE whatsoever. "what are your plans for the weekend?" "oh.. i was thinking of heading to the library to cram in a bit of studying."

it is one thing to catch up with your readings and tutorial work at home, it's another altogether to announce to the whole world you're a geek by walking into the university grounds with a freaking thick textbook and your laptop.

i am homesick.

because.........

1. i need aircon. very very desperately.

2. i have an intense beyond intense craving for nasi lemak and sambal chilli. and all the funky desserts my parents buy back home. so long as they're cold.

3. i realised how much i am missing out on back home after reading everyone's blogs. jol's birthday chalet (happening as i sit here and type this). our jc class chalet (as mentioned in adel's blog). missing another opportunity to meet ben (what the heck? he is back in singapore again?? WHY MUST HE BE THERE WHEN I AM HERE DAMNIT!!!). missing out on the stayovers and chatting and catching up and bitching. missing out on just being there for my friends when they need me.

everything has changed so much here.

fear is probably the most irrational thing ever. you can't try to rationalise it. period. that's why it is called fear. don't tell me "but it's dead! it can't jump!" or "it's so much smaller than you.. what's the problem?" or "just use a broom and a dustpan to sweep it up... don't be so pathetic." (for the record.. i don't have a broom and a dustpan.. i thrive on vacuum cleaners here) i KNOW all these. i TELL MYSELF all these too. is it my fault i'm scared stiff of anything with more than four legs? it's just a dead grasshopper in my bedroom.. but to sweep it up with a piece of paper requires me to go near it and being in such close proximity with it makes my throat constrict. i KNOW it is dead, and even if it jumps up and bites me, i WON'T get rabies. but does knowing all these help when nothing is gonna make me any less scared of it? if you refuse to help, don't make the situation worse.

so i faced my fear and got rid of it myself. but i realised that facing your fears don't necessarily make them any less intense.

on a lighter note...

HAPPY BELATED 21ST BIRTHDAY JOLYNN!!!! i hope this year would be full of blessings and joy for you.. enjoy the chalet. i just wish i was there. :(

it makes me a little sad that i'd have to miss out on all my close friends' 21st birthday celebrations. 21st birthdays are supposed to be some huge event... so chalets will be booked, parties thrown and celebrations in full swing. 3 of my close friends will be having their birthdays next month... bernard, jiehui, peishan. while i sit at a distance and observe. sigh.

and my own birthday? will be smack right in the middle of the exam period. again. what's new?

it's on hot stifling days like these i just wanna wallow in self-pity, sit around doing nothing, and mope.