When old friends met

Tan Jee Peng (4th from L), me, Boo Cheng Kee, Boo' wife,
Tan Dek's wife and Tan Dek

Imagine meeting your old friends who served as teachers 37 years ago again!

Well, I did meet them. They were Boo Cheng Kee, Tan Dek and Tan Jee Peng. We gathered in front of Royal Selangor Pewter, Straits Quay, Penang.

We talked of old time most of the time. Boo had us in stitches when he related incidents which he could remember vividly. He mentioned Anchor Chong, a teacher whose hobby is drinking Anchor beer. The lockjaw that I suffered three decades ago was also one of the incidents recalled. You can read about the incident in one of the posts under the label 'Reminiscence of Life in Jerantut'.

In one of the incidents mentioned by Boo, one Mr Phang, a Commissioner of Oath for Civil Marriages used to say 'Zhu Shen' (which means 'You Animal' when he meant ' speak louder because his Mandarin was very poor. He could have said 'Shuo da shen yi dian') when he asked the bride and bridegroom in front of him to vow that they were sincere in wanting to tie the nuptial knot.

We took some photos but I could not produce them here because I did not bring my camera along. I will try to put some here if I ever received from my old friends later.

Later we adjourned to Mr Bala's house. He was a lecturer of a teacher's college and Boo's friend. We had more vigorous talk of life in old Jerantut. Then when it was time for lunch we had our fill at a vegetarian restaurant in Burmah Road.

We hope to meet again.

Let us keep the key of happiness ourselves

In real life situation, we often feel angry because someone has done something to make us angry or he has disappointed us.

We feel angry because of the act of someone. If we have such a feeling, we are letting him keep the key of happiness. On the other hand, we should keep the key of happiness ourselves. We should think this way. His act has made us realise that we should not have done the same so that others will not get angry.

Being angry is detrimental to our health. When we get angry for three minutes, the energy extended will only be replenished after three days. Hence it is not worth it. Count up to 20 when we are about to get angry. Don't let anger control you because it will be like letting the one who makes you angry hold your key of happiness. Your feeling is controlled by his words or act. However, if you have total control over your feeling and have the mental set as mentioned earlier, you have actually keeping the key of happiness to yourself.

Serving others really pay off

I have the chance to listen to a different type of talk on motivation and I want to share with readers what I have gained from the talk. The talk was given by a person who has studied Confucianism and Buddhism and practises them in company.

According to the corporate figure, to change the mindset of the workers, the employer himself has to change. Hence he practises the teaching of Confucius and the Buddha in his capacity as the leader of his company. He shows respects to the workers by bowing to them every morning and thanks them for their work. The rules of the company was discarded and replaced with 'Di Zi Gui' (The rules of disciples) which teaches how one should behave in the capacity of a son, father, leader, subject and so on. It stresses filial piety. All workers who have read 'Di Zi Gui' have marvellously become very good workers, dedicated and hardworking.

He also practises dana and gives lots of money to the needy. The karmic effect is great and his company's performance becomes better and better. The attitude of serving others more than oneself really pays off.

A tragic incident in Penang

It is sad to learn of the death of one teacher and five students during a dragon b0at practice in Penang. The 28-year-old teacher was on the boat although he was a non-swimmer. Being an advisor of the team, he wanted to see the condition of the place but it was a journey of no return.

The parents of the four 17-year-old students who drowned together with an 16-year-old Form Four student must be missing their dear ones. As one parent told the reporter, she had some knowledge of Buddhism and knew that life is uncertain, including the arrival of sudden death.
She took it as something destined.

According to Buddhism, all of us have to undergo all four stages of life, namely birth, old age, sickness and death. Whoever is born must die one day. Hence while we are still alive, we should contribute towards society and help others whenever necessary. When it is time to go, we will have no regrets.

Will is needed to achieve our goal

This is the last day of the year 2009. From tomorrow onwards we will usher in 2010. I hope the new year will be filled with things or events that benefit the masses rather than make lives harder for them.

Usually we look forward to having a good year ahead. Expecting good things will prompt us to put our best food forward to realise what we set out to achieve.

Personally, I hope to have good health as I realise that health is more important than any other things in our lives. To enjoy good health we need to lead a healthy life in terms of food, mental set and physical activities. It boils down to consuming a balanced diet, being optimistic and exercising regularly. This is fine in theory but practising what is said in the previous sentence is not easy. For example, we tend to buy delicious food although it maybe too sweet or too oily. We can't control our temper albeit we know very well it is unhealthy. As for exercising, we are not consistent. We only exercise when we realise that we need to do it to be physically fit.

Hence will is needed to achieve what we have planned to do.

Live and let live

I was watching the news when I learnt that a turkey meant to be slaughtered by the President of America on Thanksgiving Day was spared its life. This is wonderful. According to Buddhism, sparing the life of a living being, animals included is better than building seven pagodas.

In real life situation, we can go for vegetarian diet as a way of sparing lives of animals meant for food. These include pigs, cows, goats, chickens and so on. As our food consists of vegetables, we don't have to resort to killing chickens, for example, for food.

If the spirit of non-killing is extended to other things,then wars which involve killings can be avoided. Acts of murder will be a thing of the past. How nice it would be if all human beings practise sparing lives of other fellow men and other beings.

The spirit of 'Live and let live' will then prevail.

Earning a decent living versus making easy money

Whenever I see the disabled try to earn a living themselves, I really despise the snatch-thieves. Very often, these physically-handicapped people will be selling lottery tickets, packet food or some other ware. They make money through their own effort.

As for the snatch-thieves in Malaysia, they prey on ladies carrying handbags. Not only do they take away other people's possession, they also do harm to the victims. Normally they will push the ladies until they fall. There have been cases of victims who died because of snatch-theft. Making easy money this way is really despicable.

Longing for sisterly love

I am the second son in the family. I have one brother and two younger sisters. Since I was a boy, I have been longing to have a sister. This is because usually an elder sister will love her siblings and does everything for them. Whenever I saw other children being pampered by their sisters, I was really envious and jealous of them. This longing for sisterly love is always with me.

When I had a chance to take part in the Students' Exchange Programmed held at Penang Hill way back in 1966. I met a Kuala Lumpur girl who was two years older than I. Jokingly, I asked her to be my god-sister and she agreed. After the camp, we used to correspond until I joined a teacher's college. In the letters I wrote to her, I always begin with "Dearest sister," and I could feel the sisterly love she had for me through the letters she wrote to me.

Friendship is the play of karma

In real life situation, we don't expect things to happen our ways. For example, you had planned to buy Wan Tan Mee at a certain stall but when you reached the place the stall was closed. Hence it is better for us to act according to circumstances.

A fresh graduate may not get a job suitable to his training at the university. Well, accept the job first and wait for a chance to do something related to your field when opportunity strikes later. This is the play of fate or karma as Buddhists call it.

We sometimes happen to see a stranger but we take a liking to him or her. It shows that somewhere in our last life we know him or her. React by smiling at him or her, hoping that he or she will reciprocate. At times friendship is gained this way as fate has it.

In the past I used to I wonder why I liked someone and detested another. Through the study of Buddhism I now realise that it is the play of karma. The one you like is the one very close to you such as your father, mother, wife, husband or sibling and the one you hate was your enemy or had done a lot of harm to you.

Think nothing of what you have given away

Newton's third law states that to every action, there is a reaction. For example, if we push at something with a certain force, we will experience the same amount of force acting in the oppositing direction pressing at your palm.

What I mention above applies to science. In religious term such as the one in Buddhism, every cause will result in an effect. If you treat others well, they will treat you in the same way. The reverse is also true.

Hence it is to our advantage if we choose to practise doing good karma. We can start by praising others not amounting to flattery, saying kind words, avoid scandalising others, abstain from killing however small beings are, and helping the needy in kind and money if we can afford it.

As material things are not permanent, we should not attach to it so much that we are not willing to part with them. Giving away food and money that we possess to the needy is one way of learning how to practise detachment. The working of karma is such that things given away without attachment will come back to you, sometimes many times more. Hence practising dana is actually a very good thing to do as it benefits the donor too but with one condition, that is, you must not expect to get something in return if you donate something to someone. The moment you have given away your possession, you should forget about what you have done. Only then will the law of karma work.

Hence think nothing of what you have given away.

Looking at life from another angle

In our daily lives, we are always worried about something. You may worry because you lose something. Worry occupies your mind when someone talks bad about you. Somebody may cheat you out of your money and you feel upset. If only we can look at life from another angel, then all these will not happen.

For example, you may lose your prized possession. If you are aware that it may one day get spoilt even if you don't lose it, you will not have attached so much to it that you fear parting with it. Looking at it this way, we may not worry shoud you lose your favourite thing.

If you get cheated by someone and your money goes to him, why not think that in your past life, you may have taken his money and now he rightfully gets it back. Having this train of thought may put you at ease when someone swindles your money.

Be grateful of what you have been endowed with physically and make full use of it for helping others. Should you lose one arm, you can bravely say, 'Thank God I still have another arm.' Looking at life from another angle really helps get rid of uncalled for worries.

How to counter backbiting

Some people like to talk bad about a certain person behind his back. He will dwell on the weaknesses of that person without realizing that as human beings we are not infallible. According to the teaching of the Buddha, the best way to counter such person is talk good about him in front of others. By so doing, we will make him feel ashamed that he has scandalised you and yet you are so kind as to praise him instead.
The next he is with others, he will not resort to backbiting again. It is a case of kindness begetting kindness.

Actually, we should see the good of others and rather than his weaknesses. If everyone can do this, there will be no squabbles among the human kind.

Don't take fingers for granted

We take our fingers for granted. This should not be so as in my case. I never realised that our forefinger is so useful as it helps us do many things, writing included. Besides writing, I find it difficult to hold my chopsticks when I replace the forefinger with my middle finger in holding them. In the end I resort to using fork and spoon for the time being when I partake of noodles.

My trigger finger improved a little as the swollen finger had shrunk to some degrees and I could flex my forefinger a little. I still need to go for physiotherapy sessions. I really hope to get over all these and I can use my forefinger again.

The disability to use one finger has caused so much trouble to me. I now really admire those without hands and yet can manage to go about doing things. Hence we should thank God for endowing us with perfect limbs to be part of us.

'Jiak' and the Hokkien

Food is very important to the Hokkien so much so that they will ask “Lu Jiak Par Bui?” (Have you eaten?) whenever they meet one another. The reply is invariably “Jiak liau, lu ni?” (I have eaten. How about you?”

To earn a living is ‘t’an jiak’ (earn to eat) in the lingua of the Hokkien. Again food is involved.

To work for others for pay is ‘jiak t’au lor’ to the Hokkien. Here again “jiak” (eat) is linked to ‘t’au lor’ (job)

When you ask the Hokkien, “Lu aei seng lee jou liau ang chuai?” (How is your business?), the businessman will reply “t’an jiak, t’an jiak, kneah.” (Just enough for eating (food) only). See, eating or food is again associated with business.

The saying ‘jiak ka lau, oh ka lau’ which literally means ‘eat until old, learn until old’ (life-long learning) is what the Hokkiens used to say when old people are still willing to learn new things. The word ‘jiak’ or ‘eat’ is mentioned.

So much for ‘jiak’ and the Hokkien.

Time when we do make mistakes

Some people simply cannot tolerate anyone's faults, however small they are. These perfectionists, so to speak, do not realise or purposely unwilling to learn that all human beings are not infallible. From time to time, we may make mistakes unintentionally.

As long as the person who has made some mistakes in his job admits that he has made them in a certain matter and strives to rectify them, his boss should excuse him and not reprimand him as if he had done something so serious that he had to be dealt with severely. Of course, a person should not be making mistakes repeatedly, or else he can be termed as a inefficient worker.

Sometimes, fearing mistakes tend to make one make the mistake one is afraid of committing. I still remembered how I was scared of knocking into a tree when I was learning how to cycle that I really crashed into one.

A rare occasion when buddies met

How do you feel when you have the chance to meet your old buddy after a lapse of so many years.?

Well, I had a chance to meet my buddy when I was in Kuala Lumpur to attend my son’s convocation.

I felt elated when I visited Yong Cheng Suan, my buddy in the house he bought for the use of his children two of whom are still studying in Universiti Tenaga. I was able to meet all his offspring who share the same house in Sri Kembangan. Coincidentally, my whole family was with me too. It was really a rare chance for us to meet with all our family members present.

We talked of old times for a while and Yong brought us to a Chinese restaurant for lunch. The exchange of news resumed at the lunch table. Our children also got acquainted to one another while partaking of sumptuous food at the eatery.

I really admire Yong who grows his own vegetables on the land beside his house in Raub, Pahang. On the day I was at his Sri Kembangan house, he let us taste the ‘dragon fruit’ and papayas that he harvested from his own farm. They were very delicious and pesticide-free.

Meeting a student who has become a doctor

At the hospital where I was treated for the dislocation of my jaws, an Indian man came to my bed and said, "You look familiar to me. Are you Mr Yeoh?" Then I asked him whether he was my student and he answered in the affirmative. I could not talk clearly because of my inability to move my jaws.

Later on a nurse came to tell me that the doctor wanted to talk to me. When I went to the doctor's table, he was the student who talked to me just now. He is now the medical officer of the hospital. Dr Ganesh then enlightened me that I taught him Malay when he was in Form Three. After completing his Sixth Form education in Methodist Boys' School, he furthered his studies in medicine at Universiti Putra Malaysia. He has been a doctor for thirteen years.

Through my student's help in arrangement for things to be done, things got expedited and I was relieved of my pain faster than should be. Through this blog, I would like to thank Dr Ganesh for his help when I was in predicament (Read yesterday's blog for details).

I had wanted to be a doctor

When I was small I had wanted to be a doctor. That dream remained with me until I entered Form 6. However, I could not stand viewing microorganisms under the microscope as it was very straining to my short-sighted eyes- my power then was about 800 for both eyes. Then I shifted my course to Physics and Mathematics. I did badly in Sixth Form and had to contend with entering a teacher's college. That buried my dream forever.

Then one year, I was attracted to the Chinese Medicine course and enrolled to study oriental medicine. I had only a year's stint and family burden did not allow me to have time for this pursuit and I gave up after a year, learning quite a lot about Chinese medicine and herbs.

Hence you see, we cannot have what we want and life is not a bed of roses.

Being mindful helps to avoid hurting our limbs

How often do you accidentally kick something and how many times do your fingers poke at something unintended?

Well, I often kick things on my way to a certain place like the bathroom or out to the balcony. My head knocks into something every now and then when I get up.

All the above happenings can be traced to my being not mindful. If we are not mindful, our limbs will get at things not meant to be touched. Hence we should be mindful at all times so that what I have mentioned earlier will not take place.

How to be mindful then, you may ask. Well, we must be aware of where we place our legs and where our hands go and so on. If we are mindful every moment of the day, our limbs will not sustain uncalled for pain.

Lending a hand when someone needs it

I was inside my car, ready to drive off when a passer-by kept pointing at my front tyre. When I got off my Proton Iswara, I realised that my front tyre was flat. My wife suggested that I change the deflated tyre with the spare one in my boot. I agreed and started to take out the tools - a jack and a wrench to unscrew the nuts to remove the flat tyre.

I thought it was an easy job but it was otherwise. As the levering iron was missing from my boot, it was very difficult to elevate the jack so that the flat tyre was off the ground with my screwdriver doing the job. Finally I gave up and decided to contact a tyre shop.

At that time, a woman nearby was cleaning the drain outside her house. I approached her to find out where I could find a tyre shop. Out of my expectation, she volunteered to ask the tyre man to come. Without much ado, she rode her motorcycle to the shop and brought a man to help me change the tyre. When he left, I thanked the woman profusely. She said that we should lend a hand when someone needs help.

This incident shows that human beings are by nature kind and there will always be someone who will help us when we are in difficulty.