Showing posts with label Christmas. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Christmas. Show all posts

December 13, 2018

Christmas: Heaven is Here

I remember a Christmas—I had to have been about eleven—when my single mother took me a side one day and said, “Ash”—she probably really called me by my nickname SMASH—“I have to ask you a favor.” She then proceeded to tell me that this year her Christmas budget was close to nothing. She said, “I need your help, the only thing I was able to purchase for you was a nail polish, and this year I need you to be ok with that.”

I was long past the years of asking Santa for presents, but I had never imagined a Christmas when there was going to be close to nothing under our tree. Being the brave young woman I was, I looked my mother in the eye and said, “Do not buy me another thing, if you have any money left get something for the little girls.” My little sisters were 5 and 7 years younger than me, and I was pretty sure they still had faith in the little jolly man with the red suit.

Christmas morning came, and just as she had promised all I opened was my nail polish. I sat quietly as the others opened their meager gifts.

It was hard to breathe as I chocked back tears. I wasn’t sad about the presents, but it killed me to watch my mother go around trying to smile—I could see it all over her face . . . she felt like she had failed us.

Soon there was a knock. We all scampered to the door of our little duplex and as it swung open we were surprised to see what looked like a little miniature tree standing boldly on our porch. Instead of leaves, this little tree proudly sported little wrapped up dollar bills—tiny ribbons held them tightly to each branch.

Tears filled my eyes as we picked up the little magic plant and carried it into our tiny kitchen. I looked up to see my mother’s face—it was wet from tears—as she watched us count what felt like a million dollars. We felt rich that Christmas—rich in blessings, rich in dollars, and rich in love. Someone loved us enough to know that year . . . we just needed a tiny sprout of hope, not in a little jolly man in a red suit . . . but in Christ. They were His hands that day. Angels that dropped off a tiny reminder in that tiny duplex: we were not forgotten.


Fast forward about five or six years. It is Christmas time again. My mother has remarried a very generous kind man who announced, “Kids”—there were twelve of us between the two of them, probably six of us living at home—“This year we want to do Christmas a little differently, we want to give our presents to a family who needs it. We will give you a budget and assign you partners to shop for each of their children and we will drop everything off at their house on Christmas Eve. Our goal is to make sure they have no idea where it came from. It will be really fun . . . the only catch is: we won’t be buying anything for any of you.”

My mind quickly took me back to the nail polish and the money tree, and the look in my mother’s eye. I shouted with excitement, “Yes!”

I took it to another level—as I often tend to do—and knocked on their door with a fake “research questionnaire for school”. I had to meet the people we were going to be shopping for. These total strangers let me in their house. I surveyed the room. They had no TV, and I didn’t see any sign of a scrap of food.  They had four little kids. They talked very kindly to their children as they filled out my fake questionnaire. As I drove home that night tears fell down my cheeks as I thought about all the fun things I was going to purchase for their family.

Christmas Eve came. The boxes were all lined in our front room, decorated beautifully. We loaded them into our cars. We drove in silence and when we approached their tiny apartment my step dad turned and said, “Ashlee, you are the fastest kid I know. Once we get all the presents loaded on the porch, why don’t you be the one to ring the doorbell and run around the corner.”

The porch was loaded and everyone had piled into the cars. I rang the doorbell and ran as fast as my legs could carry me.  I slammed myself into the car and we sped away. I noticed over the fence from their apartment was a Kmart. I suggested we go over to the parking lot and look over the huge cinderblock fence to see if we could see the family. (Like I said, always trying to take it to the next level.)

My stepbrother hoisted me up so I could barely peek my eyes over the wall. And there on the porch were all the presents . . . along with a mother, weeping so hard she couldn’t even bend over to pick up one box. I could hear her sobs, I could feel of the gratitude she felt, but I also could remember a moment when my own mother had cried those same tears—and I felt joy.

This time we got to be His hands—someone else had the opportunity to remember His love . . . and we got to be apart of it.

I will never forget either of these Christmas’ and the lessons I learned feeling the earthly angels . . . and how powerful it feels to be one.


Heaven is close, there are angels all around us—some we can see, and others we can only feel. This Christmas let us always remember the miracles—we even have the power to create some.  Three wise men followed a star to bring their love to a little baby far away. Most of the time we don’t have to look or travel too far to find someone who needs to be reminded that they are loved—a little glimmer of light can help us remember we are not forgotten.



December 10, 2017

The box that saved my life

This morning I sat in bed and thought about a moment of service that changed my life.  A box to "people of Japan". If you have read my first book, you know this story . . . but I wanted to share it with you again today in a new way.  #lighttheworld

January 16, 2017

Light the World...cute face

You might recognize a cute face at the end of this video!!

December 15, 2016

Our choice to shine

Yesterday I talked with a young man—I had never met before—who told me about a struggle he was facing with suicidal thoughts. My heart ached as this young kid described the feelings of insignificance and powerful beliefs that he was a loser. He said there had been many times that ending his life felt like the only way out. Luckily many words came to my mind as I tried to council and encourage and bring hope, but the image of his little face stuck with me most of the day.

I got thinking later of some of the negative battles I fight in my mind—and though they are not the same as this kid—they have at times felt so real and have been followed with feelings of insignificance in a world much bigger than me. Sometimes it is easy to feel forgotten. Negative thoughts bombard our minds. Does my effort really make a difference? How am I important...if I am just one? 

Last night we took a few pictures of our Christmas lights. This one answered some of those questions for me.



Look at this little light bulb. It belongs to a huge strand of lights. I am sure at times this little bulb has felt forgotten on a stand full of lights that look like they shine way more clearer and way more bright. Then the snow comes along and tries to suffocate any warmth that it was trying to give. I am sure at times—if this bulb could think—it thought, “Well . . . here it is . . . proof that I am a nobody. My life, and my purpose are completely forgotten today. In fact, I might just give up because if nobody can even see me . . . then what is my purpose to shine?” And in that moment when the light bulb was thinking of just turning off, it realized it had come to a crossroad. And for a light bulb, this crossroad only has two options. The first being giving up and turning off, and the second being: shining anyway. Shining, not because anyone can see or will even notice . . . but because it was what it was created to do. Shining anyway, because God sent it here to earth to shine.

Lucky for us, this little light bulb—though he couldn’t see the others, or know what road they chose to take . . . he kept shining. He just knew that once the snow stopped everything would be ok. Even though the snow kept falling on him—he didn’t give up for a second, because he believed at some point it would be over. 

Then pretty soon, the snow stopped falling. He thought for sure that the hardest part was over. Then he realized that nothing changed for him, he was still stuck under a pile of white.

And so he was, at another crossroad. This time he wasn’t sure what the end of the struggle would be. The snow was no longer falling, but he was still scared and alone. So this brave little light, you know what he did . . . HE FOUGHT. Silently, alone, defeated, and scared he decided he wasn’t just going to shine . . . He was going to shine brighter than he ever had before.

And guess what. That determined little light bulb found that the more he shinned, the more heat he let out—and the more heat that surrounded him, the less he felt secluded and abandoned. And pretty soon, that snow—that he thought would never be lifted—began to melt away.

We each have a light shining from within us. Every moment we get to decide if we will use it to light our path or if we will let it die. If you have ever wonder if you make a difference—let me promise you . . . you do. Your light is significant, your love is powerful, and you are not forgotten. We are all part of a grand strand of lights, not one of us is going to lose it’s light without it effecting all the rest.

So like I told that little boy yesterday, “He loves you, He sees you, He believes in you. To Him you are smart, and kind, and loving, and helpful, and handsome. Don’t you dare ever let anyone tell you anything different, including your mind. Those thoughts in your head—they are the lie. Your life brings light to so many people. Anytime you hear those thoughts, you get on your knees and you say a prayer. God will not forget you—but when it feels quiet—you just keep fighting!”

Just like that little boy I want you to know you make a difference. And remember, even Christ was just one man . . . your light can change the world around you as you follow His example and shine anyway. Even if no one else can see—SHINE.

December 13, 2016

The Day I learned how to believe

One snowy day—many years ago—I was driving in my car. The back seat was fairly quiet—wait no that was a different time . . . on this drive my car carried precious cargo: twins that were four years old, a two year old, and a five month old. Questions streamed to me by the minute, and this particular day they were all centered around one thing . . . Christmas. The streets were lined with lights and glowing windows. Snow covered much of the ground, and on every corner stood some sort of symbol of the holidays.


I had probably answered a million questions when THE ONE came blaring out. I knew it wasn’t going to be many more years—for us to keep our secret, with twins that were already smarter than me, but I thought for sure I at least had one more year. We had just passed a blow up Santa waving on the street when Bailey blurted it out, “So Mom . . . Bostyn and I want to know the truth—you know—about Santa. Is he . .  . real? I mean, he goes in EVERYONE’S houses and brings them presents? So how come some kids don’t get any, and CHIMNEYS? Seriously? ” Trying to protect—what I believed at that time was—their childhood innocence, my response was anything but the truth. “Well . . . girls, what do you think?” Bailey spoke up again, “Mom . . . that is why we asked you . . . so . . . is he? “ The conversation repeated a few more times—they demanding to hear it from me, and me afraid to shatter the fun of believing. My answer was the same with every question: “What do you guys think?”

Soon the car went quiet—I . . . not knowing how to tell them what they already knew, and them  . . . sick of getting the same question to their questions. I looked back a few times to two girls staring blankly out the window. I could feel their frustration, but did not know what to do about it.

My mind raced through all the excuses one could muster, but I couldn’t get myself to say any out loud. About to settle and just create a story about how reindeer fly and elves make toys I looked back in my rearview mirror again. This time they were holding hands and looking into each other’s eyes. Bostyn leaned over, kissed Bailey on the forehead and said, “Don’t worry Bailey . . . at least we know Jesus is real.”



Faith isn’t about the things that we can see—it is about a hope for the things we cannot. There are many Santa’s in the world trying to bring joy at Christmas, but the true symbol of that glorious holiday is our Savior who will be a light every day of the year—for you, for me, and for all of us Santa’s doing our best to bring light to our babies’ eyes.

For every disappointment we will face—like the day we find out one of our dreams was just a made up character in a red hat and suit—Christ will make up the difference, He will settle the scores. Because He loves you—no matter where you are going, no matter where you have been. He loves you, even if you have never believed in Him.

The greatest joy we can ever receive this Christmas doesn’t come wrapped under our tree, or shine in the sparkle of a string of holiday lights. It is miracles in our lives. It is hope in our hearts. It is love in our families, and healing inside our minds. It is relationships mended, and hearts changed. It is medical discoveries, and lives spared in tragedies. It is angels watching over us. It is a path that leads us to Christ, as our teacher, as our Savior, and as our friend.


He is the light, He is the joy, and He always was and always will be . . . the greatest gift.


Merry Christmas! 

December 12, 2016

Follow the Light

Our Light the World donation and devotional on Friday was really fun. Horrible weather and all we got some great donations. Thank you to everyone who came and supported the kids. It was incredible to see all these young kids sit and listen to the presenters. It was silent in the building. I think Nathan was one of their favorite of the night. And you will see why in this video. His strength and message is so powerful. Thank you Nathan for coming and sharing your light with us. 



November 19, 2016

Shelter for a King

The past few weeks I have had a couple experiences that have made me realize there are a lot of people in this world who need us.

For a long time I believed that I needed other people . . . to make me feel good about myself, to fix me when I was hurting, to tell me I was of worth so I could feel it inside. I thought life was about waiting around for angels.

For a long time I believed that I had been robbed: of life, of love, of family—of the past, of the future, of worth, of value. Only in those moments I never once realized . . . I had no idea what it was like to have nothing.

A few nights ago I heard a story about a woman who worked at a homeless shelter who noticed a new lady walking in the soup kitchen door with no shoes on. She ran into her office and searched high and low to find the shoeless woman a voucher so she could send her to a store to purchase some shoes. When she walked out to deliver it, she noticed that the woman's feet were now covered. Confused she looked around the room to find that one of the shelters usual dinner guests was now barefoot. She hurried over to the woman walking around with no shoes and questioned what had happened. The hungry, barefoot woman exclaimed, "Well . . . I noticed she didn't have any shoes, and I have two pairs." The very humbled shelter director walked into her office in tears wondering how on earth she had never seen things that way. In her closet at home sat twenty pairs of shoes, but she had never once taken them from off her feet to protect the naked feet of another. 

It is stories like this that motivate us to want to help someone else, but it is moments where we get to help that we gain a testimony of the impact we can have another person's life and the blessings it can bring to our own.

I have been battling impressions for a few weeks on how to share some stories that have changed my life. So today these impressions win. I am going to share some tender moments, not to bring attention to the people in them, but to help bring to light the others in the story who need you. 

Each week our family does some sort of activity together. Some days we watch a few motivational videos; others we play at the park.  Sometimes we read the scriptures and study a bible story, or attend a dance recital or basketball game.

The last few years we have been trying to incorporate situations where the kids can develop empathy and learn to serve someone else—babysitting for a friend; cleaning our church building; or making dinner for a family in need.

This month we decided to try something new. We signed our whole family up to serve dinner at a soup kitchen at a men’s shelter. Honestly, I originally called the shelter because I was looking for an eye opening moment for my children, wake them up to life outside of our bubble. Help them gain some appreciation for all that they had. Help them to be more accepting of each other, and the sacrifices that are made for them every single day.

I knew it was going to be an eye opening experience for our very sheltered children, but I didn’t realize the impact it was going to have on all of us.

We had talked about it for weeks, but once Sunday night came everything seemed to try to keep us from getting there. Determined to carry out our commitment, we loaded our family in the car and headed to the shelter.

We entered the building, unsure of what exactly we had signed up for. To get to the kitchen we had to walk down halls lined with men from all walks of life.  The kids kept their heads down and walked silently in a row. Once we got to the kitchen, we washed up and were given our assignments. The four big kids would be dishing up the food, and Shawn and I were assigned to help the two youngest serve the trays to all the men who had come for dinner.

The meal looked like Thanksgiving—including a giant tray of Jell-O. All of which had come in as donations. The kids each took a job and did their best to get their assigned food onto the tray. Sometimes they spilled gravy all over the rolls, sometimes the turkey fell in the Jello, but each time I went back for another tray they were laughing—grinning from ear to ear. Talking to the other volunteer that had come to serve that day. She was telling them stories of the men she had met there, and about all she had learned from serving them.

Every tray we delivered was greeted with a, “Wow. Thank you so very much.” One gentleman said to Tytus, “I have been coming here a while now . . . and every time I have had to stand in line for a long time to get this tray. What a treat to have a kind little boy serve me. Eating like a king today. ”

My heart stopped for a minute, as I stared into this humble man's eyes. A king? All Tytus had done was say hello and bring him a tray of food. I looked around the room. It was full of kings, grateful for a meal . . . but even more excited to see a smile. 

The workers said that it is rare to have more than two volunteers to help dish up the food every night, let alone be able to serve these men individually.

After the last man was served their food, Kaleeya and Tytus went around taking orders for drinks. We only had two options—water and tea—but the sparkle in their eyes as they pushed the button and filled those cups was that of pure love. 

Those cups were not the only ones being filled in that room. There were eight of us who went to the shelter that night, thinking we were going to fill up trays and cups for hungry men. I think we were the ones there to be filled. 

By the end of the night our kids didn’t want to leave. They asked if we could stay just a few more hours.
Up on the ceiling above us was a sign, “You can’t save a man by telling him of his sins. He knows them already. Tell him there is a pardon and love waiting for him . . . Make him understand you believe in him, and never give up.” Fanny J. Crosby

Sometimes it is easy to forget that we are all children of God. We almost get entitled—thinking maybe because of our faith we are loved just a little bit more. But if we really study the books that our faiths are built on, we will find that God loves the sinners, the hypocrites, and the imperfect—so all of us.


I always pictured that I would need to go over seas to feed the world and teach my children how to serve them, but turns out there are many who are poor—in body and in spirit—right in our own back yard. The simple act of seeing someone sitting alone at a table, and brining them food can help them feel remembered—like they are eating like a King.

On the way out I took a picture of another sign. It was small and taped on the wall in the back kitchen, “Go make the invisible God visible.”

My heart has been full thinking of that shelter these past few weeks. Remembering times in my life when I was the poor being helped.  Knocks at my own door with trays of food, arms to hold babies, and hearts to bring peace. 

I wish I could go back and spend a little more time in appreciation for all that was done for me. I wish I would have known that many of those hands holding my babies were probably hurting too. 

Sometimes God sends others to help save us—from pain, from fear, from starvation. And other times we get to share our love—and be saved in a different way. We don't have to have it all figured out to be able to help another. In both experiences I have felt closer to God, because it is Him who is blessing us with the light. 

Even the broken, can comfort the lonely. Even the imperfect can show perfect love. 

I am so grateful we live in a world that still has people who care—for every mouth and every heart is numbered in heaven.

We can #lighttheworld. It doesn’t cost anything to bring light to another, and we don’t have to give it up to share it. It multiplies inside the more we give it away.

This holiday season . . . let us remember the One. The one who washed the feet of those who served Him, and let them do the same for Him.


We are all in this together—children of God.

I have the goal to travel around this country sharing hope . . . with victims, with the broken, with the hurting. I always thought that maybe words were my only mission to do that. And then I saw there are some people who don't even have food to eat and shoes on their feet. So these communities that I visit. I want to do more than tell stories and share hope . . . I want to give it. 

Every single person you meet has a story. For some, life has failed them . . . others have failed at life. But we are all God's children and it is up to us to help them find Him. It is amazing to see that in those moments . . . so do we.

These experiences have made me ask some questions to myself. How many pairs of shoes do you have? How many meals do you take for granted? How many times do you withhold a smile, to someone looking for a sign their life is worth living?

I know individually we can't save the world—that is like thinking we can fill the ocean all on our own—but we can put in our two drops to try. We can make a difference. I need your help. Get out in your community. Send money to organizations who are seeking to save. It is our job alone to share our light with everyone we meet. 

Someday we will all stand before God. He won't be proud of how many shoes we collected at the end of our life . . . but how many we took off of our feet to give to one of His children.

Be the light. This holiday season, and forever. 






December 2016:
I am going to be teaming up with some local organizations and Mormon.org for their #lighttheworld campaign. Please join us. If you have any way you can help, us or others, just find a way to bring light the world. No matter your religion, your skin color, your socioeconomic status, your faith—or lack of faithyou can make a difference. 

We are going to be collecting donations for the local shelters and families in need and having a little Christmas devotional. Please stop by and come say hello. I will announce the location next week along with all the details. If you know of a family who could use anything specific please contact me directly themomentswestand@gmail.com so I can get that organized. If your family wants to sponsor a family or if you want to make a donation and will not be able to come meet up with us please feel free to contact me. 

Thank you all in advance. We have all been blessed with so much. As we clean out our closets this week, and make purchases through the next month for strangers in need I know we will have angels assist us to direct us where to go, who to feed, and what feet to cover. Those shoes taking up dust in your closets . . . could change someone's life. 

Happy Thanksgiving. I am thankful for all of you. 
Ashlee








 
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