Gastonia Man pees in the ABC store parking lot and won't show his hands to the police afterward.
A Gastonia man was wrestled to the ground on Wednesday after he urinated in the parking lot of an ABC store and refused to show a Bessemer City police officer his hands.
It's a shame Merle Haggard has passed, this one is a natural for an "Okie From Muskogee" parody:
We don't piss on the street in Gastonia,
And we always show our hands to the BCPD;
We don't shoot our homies down on Main Street
We like living right and holdin' our pee.
Well I'm proud to be a groaner from Gastonia,
A place where you don't pee against a wall;
We still wave our weiners IN the restroom
And wash our hands as we leave the stall.
Showing posts with label peckerwoods. Show all posts
Showing posts with label peckerwoods. Show all posts
Thursday, May 05, 2016
Saturday, October 04, 2014
Wednesday, March 05, 2014
Friday, January 03, 2014
Meanwhile, In Indian Trail, NC...
...which is just a half hour's walk down the road, one of our town politicians got tired of elected life and wrote a resignation letter - - in Klingon, the language of a fictional race from Star Trek.
Tuesday, December 31, 2013
Yer Johnson Or Yer Life
A box cutter and a trailer were involved, as you might imagine, as was threats to tie the victim to a tree.
I didn't know that the area south of Indianapolis was that much of a Deliverance-style wilderness, myself...
I didn't know that the area south of Indianapolis was that much of a Deliverance-style wilderness, myself...
Sunday, December 29, 2013
Meanwhile, In Cartersville, GA...
...a couple come to blows over the Bible:
A man and a woman were arrested for battery following a fight over the Bible and the Ten Commandments, Georgia police said.
The fight occurred at 1 a.m. Saturday morning in a hotel room in Cartersville.
When the police officer entered the motel room, he saw blood on the carpet and a bloody towel in the sink, the police report states.
Carolyn Unfricht, one of the detainees, told the officer that the conversation had become tense, and that she used a Bible to hit Daniel Camarda across the face, the Atlanta Journal-Constitution reported.
If I had to bet I'd say it was probably a King James Bible placed by the Gideons.
A man and a woman were arrested for battery following a fight over the Bible and the Ten Commandments, Georgia police said.
The fight occurred at 1 a.m. Saturday morning in a hotel room in Cartersville.
When the police officer entered the motel room, he saw blood on the carpet and a bloody towel in the sink, the police report states.
Carolyn Unfricht, one of the detainees, told the officer that the conversation had become tense, and that she used a Bible to hit Daniel Camarda across the face, the Atlanta Journal-Constitution reported.
If I had to bet I'd say it was probably a King James Bible placed by the Gideons.
Tuesday, December 03, 2013
Saturday, November 16, 2013
Meanwhile, Just South of Monroe, NC...
...where they chain foster children to the porch with a dead chicken tied to its neck...
Later on, of course, they progress to tying people to trees and making them squeal like pigs:
A Union County social worker was one of two adults charged with intentional child abuse Friday after deputies found a child handcuffed to a porch with a dead chicken around his neck.
Dorian Lee Harper and Wanda Sue Larson, both 57, have been charged with numerous offenses after a deputy discovered the child at 4116 Austin Road, south of Monroe, authorities said.
Larson is employed as a supervisor with Union County Department of Social Services. She and Harper had adopted four children and were serving as foster parents for a fifth child, officials said.
A deputy was responding to an animal services complaint at a neighboring home Friday when he walked up to Harper’s and Larson’s residence and saw a “10-12-year-old child secured to the front porch at the ankle, by what appeared to be a pair of handcuffs,” officials said.
“The child also had a dead chicken hanging around his neck and appeared to be shivering,” the Sheriff’s Office said.
Larson was not present when the children were discovered but is accused of being complicit in the ongoing mistreatment of the children, the Sheriff’s Office said. She was also charged with willful failure to discharge her duty as a public official.
The child handcuffed to the porch is the 11-year-old Harper and Larson had been fostering, authorities said. The children are now in custody of an undisclosed social services agency outside Union County.
Well, that ought to discourage immigration to this part of North Carolina for the forseeable future.
Update: It's on Drudge, so now the whole world knows about it.
Later on, of course, they progress to tying people to trees and making them squeal like pigs:
A Union County social worker was one of two adults charged with intentional child abuse Friday after deputies found a child handcuffed to a porch with a dead chicken around his neck.
Dorian Lee Harper and Wanda Sue Larson, both 57, have been charged with numerous offenses after a deputy discovered the child at 4116 Austin Road, south of Monroe, authorities said.
Larson is employed as a supervisor with Union County Department of Social Services. She and Harper had adopted four children and were serving as foster parents for a fifth child, officials said.
A deputy was responding to an animal services complaint at a neighboring home Friday when he walked up to Harper’s and Larson’s residence and saw a “10-12-year-old child secured to the front porch at the ankle, by what appeared to be a pair of handcuffs,” officials said.
“The child also had a dead chicken hanging around his neck and appeared to be shivering,” the Sheriff’s Office said.
Larson was not present when the children were discovered but is accused of being complicit in the ongoing mistreatment of the children, the Sheriff’s Office said. She was also charged with willful failure to discharge her duty as a public official.
The child handcuffed to the porch is the 11-year-old Harper and Larson had been fostering, authorities said. The children are now in custody of an undisclosed social services agency outside Union County.
Well, that ought to discourage immigration to this part of North Carolina for the forseeable future.
Update: It's on Drudge, so now the whole world knows about it.
Saturday, November 09, 2013
Sowin' Those Wild Oats
In a pickup truck at a Waffle House parking lot, so drunk you mistook a cheeseburger for a sandal.
This article made it to the UK Daily Mail, probably the most popular paper in the UK. So this is how the Brits form their stereotypes of US citizens.
This article made it to the UK Daily Mail, probably the most popular paper in the UK. So this is how the Brits form their stereotypes of US citizens.
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
I Don't Remember That From Matthew 25
[34] “Then the King will say to those on His right, ‘Come, you who are blessed of My Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. [35] ‘For I was hungry, and you gave Me something to eat; I was thirsty, and you gave Me something to drink; I was a stranger, and you invited Me in; [36] naked, and you clothed Me; I was sick, and you visited Me; I was in prison, and you came to Me.’
You notice there is nothing in that passage about coming to the prison with meth:
"Mom Accused Of Smuggling Meth in Bible Visiting Daughter in Jail."
Must be one of those newer translations.
You notice there is nothing in that passage about coming to the prison with meth:
"Mom Accused Of Smuggling Meth in Bible Visiting Daughter in Jail."
Must be one of those newer translations.
Monday, August 12, 2013
Ixnay On the Essiahmay
In Tennessee, a judge changed a boy's name from Messiah to Martin.
He might get a complex and end up crucified, otherwise.
He might get a complex and end up crucified, otherwise.
Sunday, August 11, 2013
SC Police Capture Redneck Ninja
Apparently the ninja's disconnected cell phone auto-dialed 911.
The officer noticed that Shuler was carrying a large walking stick and what appeared to be a knife in his back pocket, the report states. Police found another pocket knife in his front pocket and concealed pipes measuring seven inches and four inches long.
The pipes had pieces of cord attached to them and the police initially mistook them for improvised batons, according to the report. Inside one of the pipes police found a shell and buck shot.
Police discovered the pipes were actually improvised shotguns, and Shuler was charged with unlawfully carrying the firearms.
Officers also found a razor blade hidden in Shuler’s phone case and a needle in the bill of his hat.
So: A cane or staff, two home-made shotguns, two knives, a razor blade and a needle. It's possible that the shotguns will get the guy charged under the 1934 National Firearms Act, a federal offense.
The officer noticed that Shuler was carrying a large walking stick and what appeared to be a knife in his back pocket, the report states. Police found another pocket knife in his front pocket and concealed pipes measuring seven inches and four inches long.
The pipes had pieces of cord attached to them and the police initially mistook them for improvised batons, according to the report. Inside one of the pipes police found a shell and buck shot.
Police discovered the pipes were actually improvised shotguns, and Shuler was charged with unlawfully carrying the firearms.
Officers also found a razor blade hidden in Shuler’s phone case and a needle in the bill of his hat.
So: A cane or staff, two home-made shotguns, two knives, a razor blade and a needle. It's possible that the shotguns will get the guy charged under the 1934 National Firearms Act, a federal offense.
Monday, July 29, 2013
Unworthy of the Love of a Good Woman
She flattened the tires on his truck to prevent him from driving while drunk.
He responded by beating the crap out of her. Already out on bail, too. Click the link to read the rest, and to look at the pic of this useless piece of crap with his improbably yellow hair and the appropriately-named wifebeater t-shirt he's wearing.
Where else but Rock Hill, SC?
He responded by beating the crap out of her. Already out on bail, too. Click the link to read the rest, and to look at the pic of this useless piece of crap with his improbably yellow hair and the appropriately-named wifebeater t-shirt he's wearing.
Where else but Rock Hill, SC?
Saturday, July 27, 2013
The Charlotte Area's Very Own Punisher
He started his very own list of sex offenders to kill.
When Charles Parker registered as a sex offender in Jonesville, S.C., he became a prospect on another man’s kill list.
Parker, 59, died last week at his home, shot in the neck and chest and then stabbed. His wife was also shot and stabbed.
Sheriff’s officials believe the double murder in Jonesville – a town of about 900 residents 75 miles southwest of Charlotte – was not the byproduct of a botched drug deal or a home invasion. Rather, they suspect that Parker’s death was intended as the opening phase of a man’s quest to purge sex offenders from Union County.
“He went through our sex offender registry,” said Sheriff David H. Taylor, “and individually picked out targets.”
After the suspect, Jeremy Moody, 30, was arrested Wednesday, he acknowledged to the authorities that he had planned to kill again Thursday. And he said he had explained to Parker why he had been targeted.
“I’m not here to rob you,” investigators say Moody told Parker. “I’m here to kill you because you’re a child molester.”
Turns out that the victim was not a child molester, although he was a registered sex offender.
The murderer is a some sort of skinhead or just a skinhead wannabe:
Moody, a resident of nearby Lockhart, S.C., had long been a subject of monitoring by law enforcement officials, who followed his postings on social media websites before losing track of his online presence about a year ago.
Taylor declined to elaborate on what specifically prompted his agency’s concerns about Moody, who has a criminal record and the word “skinhead” tattooed across his neck.
“We’ve never thought of him as possibly being a serial killer, but he is someone who we have been watching for the last several years,” Taylor said. “We’re in the South, and it isn’t often you see people running around here with ‘skinhead’ tattooed under their neck.”
Whether Moody has formal ties to white supremacist groups remains a focus of the investigation. Both the Parkers were white.
Here's a pic of the ugly bastard with his even uglier tattoo:
From reading the article, you get the impression that he was on law enforcement's radar mainly because of that tattoo, although he has a NC criminal record, as well. Looks like he's a drunk with a temper problem.
Guess he'll fit in right well with the Aryan Brotherhood in prison.
When Charles Parker registered as a sex offender in Jonesville, S.C., he became a prospect on another man’s kill list.
Parker, 59, died last week at his home, shot in the neck and chest and then stabbed. His wife was also shot and stabbed.
Sheriff’s officials believe the double murder in Jonesville – a town of about 900 residents 75 miles southwest of Charlotte – was not the byproduct of a botched drug deal or a home invasion. Rather, they suspect that Parker’s death was intended as the opening phase of a man’s quest to purge sex offenders from Union County.
“He went through our sex offender registry,” said Sheriff David H. Taylor, “and individually picked out targets.”
After the suspect, Jeremy Moody, 30, was arrested Wednesday, he acknowledged to the authorities that he had planned to kill again Thursday. And he said he had explained to Parker why he had been targeted.
“I’m not here to rob you,” investigators say Moody told Parker. “I’m here to kill you because you’re a child molester.”
Turns out that the victim was not a child molester, although he was a registered sex offender.
The murderer is a some sort of skinhead or just a skinhead wannabe:
Moody, a resident of nearby Lockhart, S.C., had long been a subject of monitoring by law enforcement officials, who followed his postings on social media websites before losing track of his online presence about a year ago.
Taylor declined to elaborate on what specifically prompted his agency’s concerns about Moody, who has a criminal record and the word “skinhead” tattooed across his neck.
“We’ve never thought of him as possibly being a serial killer, but he is someone who we have been watching for the last several years,” Taylor said. “We’re in the South, and it isn’t often you see people running around here with ‘skinhead’ tattooed under their neck.”
Whether Moody has formal ties to white supremacist groups remains a focus of the investigation. Both the Parkers were white.
Here's a pic of the ugly bastard with his even uglier tattoo:
From reading the article, you get the impression that he was on law enforcement's radar mainly because of that tattoo, although he has a NC criminal record, as well. Looks like he's a drunk with a temper problem.
Guess he'll fit in right well with the Aryan Brotherhood in prison.
Should You Stand Your Ground In An Assault With Pizza?
And can you shoot someone assaulting you with a pizza?
More weekend hijinks from Fort Mill, SC:
Deputies were called to 1034 JW Wilson Road where they met with a 40-year-old woman who told police her boyfriend, Jimmy Ray Poage, threw pizza at her, according to a York County Sheriff’s report. Poage then grabbed her around her neck and slammed her against the kitchen counter.
When deputies arrived at the home, the woman’s arms, face and clothing were still covered in pizza sauce, the report states. There were also red marks on her neck and a cut on her back.
Poage initially denied throwing the pizza or hitting his girlfriend, but then recanted, deputies said, and told authorities he did throw the pizza only after she threw it at him, the report states.
Ah ha! He's claiming self-defense!
More weekend hijinks from Fort Mill, SC:
Deputies were called to 1034 JW Wilson Road where they met with a 40-year-old woman who told police her boyfriend, Jimmy Ray Poage, threw pizza at her, according to a York County Sheriff’s report. Poage then grabbed her around her neck and slammed her against the kitchen counter.
When deputies arrived at the home, the woman’s arms, face and clothing were still covered in pizza sauce, the report states. There were also red marks on her neck and a cut on her back.
Poage initially denied throwing the pizza or hitting his girlfriend, but then recanted, deputies said, and told authorities he did throw the pizza only after she threw it at him, the report states.
Ah ha! He's claiming self-defense!
Friday, May 10, 2013
Whoops, Walked Right Into That One
That would be a steak knife in Rock Hill, SC:
A Rock Hill woman told police that she accidentally “walked” into a steak knife her brother’s fiancée was holding while they were drinking Wednesday night.
Police went to a Chestnut Street home at about 11 p.m. to investigate a stabbing, according to a Rock Hill police report. They found a woman, 47, with stab wounds in her upper left side.
The woman and her brother told police the stabbing was an accident, the report states. The brother, 43, told officers that his fiancée, 46, was using a steak knife to take their air conditioning unit out of the window because she did not have a screwdriver.
He said everyone in the house had been drinking beer and “having a good time” as his sister told his fiancée not to take the air conditioner out of the window, the report states.
The woman said she walked toward her brother’s fiancée, who turned around quickly. That’s when the woman says he accidentally walked into the knife, the report states, puncturing her upper left side.
Wonder if the brother's fiancée was named Bladie Mae?
A Rock Hill woman told police that she accidentally “walked” into a steak knife her brother’s fiancée was holding while they were drinking Wednesday night.
Police went to a Chestnut Street home at about 11 p.m. to investigate a stabbing, according to a Rock Hill police report. They found a woman, 47, with stab wounds in her upper left side.
The woman and her brother told police the stabbing was an accident, the report states. The brother, 43, told officers that his fiancée, 46, was using a steak knife to take their air conditioning unit out of the window because she did not have a screwdriver.
He said everyone in the house had been drinking beer and “having a good time” as his sister told his fiancée not to take the air conditioner out of the window, the report states.
The woman said she walked toward her brother’s fiancée, who turned around quickly. That’s when the woman says he accidentally walked into the knife, the report states, puncturing her upper left side.
Wonder if the brother's fiancée was named Bladie Mae?
Friday, April 26, 2013
Paging Mr. Darwin
In my hometown of Gainesville, Florida, a man was hospitalized after trying to shoot a squirrel with a .40 S&W cartridge taped to the end of the barrel of a BB gun. The cartridge exploded, striking him with fragments.
This genius, a felon prohibited from owning real firearms, claims he was trying to kill a squirrel for dinner. Well, the BB gun involved, a Crosman 760 Pumpmaster, is capable of killing a squirrel without additional help. Or it would be easy enough to catch squirrels in a havahart trap, for that matter.
This genius, a felon prohibited from owning real firearms, claims he was trying to kill a squirrel for dinner. Well, the BB gun involved, a Crosman 760 Pumpmaster, is capable of killing a squirrel without additional help. Or it would be easy enough to catch squirrels in a havahart trap, for that matter.
Friday, February 22, 2013
The Possum Will Drop Again
A victory over PETA:
New Years Eve apparently include a possum drop again this year in the North Carolina mountain community of Brasstown.
The state Senate voted 41-2 Thursday in favor of a bill that would give a state agency the right to issue a permit to organizers of the annual Brasstown Possum Drop.
The event, in an unincorporated community in Clay County, began nearly 20 years ago. Organizer Clay Logan said he wanted some sort of fun way to bring in the new year. Rather than raise a ball, as in New York City, he and other event sponsors put an opossum in a large, glass-walled box, and slowly lowered it to the ground.
The animal is then released, Logan says.
But the event was blocked two months ago by PETA, which claimed it amounted to animal abuse. PETA successfully got a court order stopping the event, saying the N.C. Department of Environment and Natural Resources did not have the authority to grant a permit allowing someone to temporarily hold a wild animal.
Don't know if this means that PETA will surrender on the issue, though. Liberal groups are stubborn about such things.
New Years Eve apparently include a possum drop again this year in the North Carolina mountain community of Brasstown.
The state Senate voted 41-2 Thursday in favor of a bill that would give a state agency the right to issue a permit to organizers of the annual Brasstown Possum Drop.
The event, in an unincorporated community in Clay County, began nearly 20 years ago. Organizer Clay Logan said he wanted some sort of fun way to bring in the new year. Rather than raise a ball, as in New York City, he and other event sponsors put an opossum in a large, glass-walled box, and slowly lowered it to the ground.
The animal is then released, Logan says.
But the event was blocked two months ago by PETA, which claimed it amounted to animal abuse. PETA successfully got a court order stopping the event, saying the N.C. Department of Environment and Natural Resources did not have the authority to grant a permit allowing someone to temporarily hold a wild animal.
Don't know if this means that PETA will surrender on the issue, though. Liberal groups are stubborn about such things.
Monday, January 14, 2013
Thursday, December 13, 2012
Yer White Trash Musical Interlude
Ray Wylie Hubbard singing James McMurtry's Choctaw Bingo, with McMurtry himself and Gurf Morlix along for the ride:
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
